Disclaimer: Touhou belongs to Zun, and the only things that belong to myself would be Usagi the mimic, and Moegi the japanese beetle. Everything else belongs to their rightful owner.

K/N: ...Master... ...No, me.

Y/N: Yes~?

K/N: How do you deal with it...?

Y/N: Deal with what?

K/N: You know what... To not be able to save her.

Y/N: I haven't a clue as to who you might be talking abou-

K/N: Sanae.

Y/N: Ahh, yes.

K/N: Well...?

Y/N: I simply try not to think about it, or the dreams~

K/N: ...So you have them too. The nightmares.

Y/N: Of course. There are some things that never go away, after all, little me.

K/N: I'm not that much younger than you, you know... About a millennia and a half, if I'm not mistaken.

Y/N: True, but that is to avoid confusion~

K/N: ...Right. If you say so.

Y/N: Anywho, in the end, I do all sorts of things to simply not think about your failure.

K/N: My f-?! ...Ohh. Right. ...So that's why you fool around so much?

Y/N: Perhaps~

Peeking open an eye, I sighed. I wonder if my being missing is noticed by Suwako? Kanako likely doesn't at all, but Suwako always did like me. Well, as Kogasa. Now she's just suspicious, figuring I have some grand scheme in play as I sweep away at the courtyard. Aren't we atleast some level of friends? Of course, we were far from the closest of friends, but I did save Sanae from a world of trouble when she did what finalized their entry into Gensoukyou. Sends a chill down my spine just thinking about it...

Now that I was nice and awake once more, I grabbed for the diary of the most beautiful karakasa in existence.

Tadanaka left me something. Aside from a fairly large sum of money he left with me, due to my telling him about wills, he also left me

He left me an umbrella just like mine, save for being normal. With it, I found a note explaining this. I was quite touched, even if it reopened

I chuckled with a small smile, and unfolded the perfectly preserved note. Having control over the border of time does have its perks. setting the book down a moment, I began to read.

To my dearest Hitomi, whom I have likely left behind for one reason or another. I am sorry that my life-span is not as long as yours, nor is my body as tough. I am sorry that, in comparison to yours, my life is but a momentary thing. But you enjoyed that moment in which we were together, didn't you? I know I enjoyed it. And I thank you for teaching me of these western wills. As you must already know, I left you a sum of money in that gap of yours. Gradually did I save it up, so as not to draw attention. You never said anything, but I am sure that you knew. What is there to say, really? I have gone to a place you will not go for some time, hopefully. Was I a good enough person to reach that paradise you spoke of? If I was, perhaps you could come visit some day. Or perhaps I could simply find you. Or was I cast into the depths of the Burning Hell? I cannot say that my hands are free of blood, even if I did not mean it.

But that is neither here nor there. What I leave this note for, is to explain the familiar umbrella. As we never tried to produce a child, I took the liberty of having one crafted for us. Think of her as an adoptive daughter. You once spoke of a collection of umbrellas kept, which you treated like family. Ones you kept an army of in that place that is neither here nor there, and instead seemingly nowhere at all. Will you watch over that umbrella? I was planning to bring her to your attention eventually, but I suppose that never did happen.

By the time I had reached the end of the note, it felt like I had a lump in my throat, and tears were dripping onto the note once again. It was as if this note were a dagger that ripped open one of the still healing wounds in my heart. It was as if my mind were thrown back to the day I found the note and umbrella, and had just recently lost Tadanaka.

Folding the slightly moistened note, I placed it back in the book. With my eyes still quite teary and a tad red, I went to the next page.

Today she found her. Chen. She

I really am master.

Alright, breathe. Just try to calm down. Just imagine yourself in Tadanaka's and Sanae's arms.

I couldn't help but blush a bit, and also calm down at the thought. Imagining being in both of their arms is surprisingly relaxing.

That works surprisingly well. I shall have to keep that in mind for when next I have to calm myself down. It was hard enough staying calm all day as Ran cuddled the cat she had adopted.

Right, I should start from the beginning.

Today, Ran and I were on a bit of a stroll when we discovered something interesting. An ordinary brown cat being chased by a feral youkai. I believe it was a werewolf. Would fit with how it was a full moon. Anyways, Ran swiftly went to her rescue, apparently falling in love with the little kitty-cat at first sight. Reminds me of Tadanaka, although not in quite the same way. So as to match with her own name a bit, she named the cat Chen.

Why did it have to, of all things, be Chen? Now I truly am certain that I am her. Before, I had simply been going by it just in case.

So, for the rest of the stroll, Ran carried the little cat, and we arrived home before we knew it, where Ran went to go feed the scrawny little thing.

With a sigh, I once more put the mark back in its place. That was a tear-jerker, just like last time... Not that I hate it when it gets like that, as they were good memories, but still...

With another sigh, I placed the book on my nightstand, and sat up and began to stretch. Starting to feel better~