First off, let me apologize for the extremely late update. I have been busy with finals and just personal/fandom crisis that led to the delay of this update. Thank you all so much for the kind reviews/follow/favorite. I promise now it's summer I will update more regularly. Thank you for still sticking with this story.
Chapter 9. It's Hard To Get By Just Upon A Smile
You know I've seen a lot of what the world can do
And it's breakin' my heart in two
Because I never wanna see you a sad girl
Don't be a bad girl
But if you wanna leave, take good care
I hope you make a lot of nice friends out there
But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware
(Wild World, Cat Stevens)
Enjolras was waken up the following morning by a piercing shriek coming from his bedroom, followed by various grunts and a usually-raspy-but-now-high-pitched female voice asking various questions and delivering exclamations.
Somewhere among the noises he could hear Grantaire's voice, full of panic and tired at the same time.
"Mademoiselle I do not know anything. I don't remember anything. Please stop asking questions."
"What do you mean you don't know anything surely you must know something! How did you and I end up in the same bed?..."
"I honestly do not…"
"Don't give me that Monsieur Grantaire!"
"I don't know what you want…"
Enjolras rose from the couch, stretched out his arms and yawned sleepily. It was one of those few moments in the day when he allowed himself to relax and simply be droopy. This morning Enjolras had found no reason to rush. The corner of his mouth curled up into a smile as he heard Éponine stomping her foot, and he burst out laughing when Grantaire shot out of his bedroom with one leg putting in one trouser, his hair all messy.
"Good morning Grantaire."
"Morning Enjolras." He grunted while managing to pull up his trousers. "Found a surprise in my bed. I have to admit I have always dreamed of waking up in the morning with a Mademoiselle by my side, but never have I ever thought it would turn out this way."
"Be careful what you wish for." Was Enjolras' response.
"I didn't...did I?" Grantaire gestured to the bedroom worriedly.
"No."
Éponine came out right after Grantaire. The two men stopped talking and turned to her, anticipating an anger from hell. Fortunately, she only glared knives and daggers and samurai swords at them before stomping out the door, not forgetting to slam it especially hard.
"Quite a girl isn't she?" Grantaire commented.
"Very memorable yes." Enjolras agreed. "Now about that time when you went to talk about Robespierre but instead chose to gamble with the host…"
"Ah, Mademoiselle Éponine, there you are!" exclaimed Joly when Eponine walked into the back room. "I've been expecting you."
Éponine blinked. "Yes?"
"How are you feeling this evening?"
"I'm feeling fine…"
"Have you anything to eat?" he hastily cut in.
"Erm…"
"Good evening Mademoiselle Éponine." Shouted Feuilly from behind her. Éponine turned around and was met with three smiling faces, one of them was even of Grantaire. Meanwhile, Joly continued babbling excitedly.
"Would you like something to eat? You look so thin Éponine. After consuming such a large amount of alcohol your body needs nourishment! Your skin is so yellow, I worry for your liver function."
"Well I…"
Without warning, Joly grabbed her hand and almost dragged her to a table nearby. "Take your time. I'll get you something to eat. No wine for you tonight, I think you'd have to forgive me."
"I…"
Éponine sat down and looked around her. In a corner there were Combeferre, Courfeyrac and Enjolras deeply engaged in a conversation as usual. At a table near her Bossuet and Bahorel were laughing while Grantaire laid back in his chair, his gaze fixed upon the other trio while pretending to listen to Bossuet and Bahorel. Nothing was out of the usual. It could not be that this was a conspiracy; les amis ganged up together to do something to her could it?
"Mademoiselle Éponine…" said a shyly Jehan sneaking up from behind her. "I could not help but ask…I noticed that last night you were quoting Aeschylus, yes?"
"I was?" Éponine was confused.
"Yes you were." Jehan's eyes were sparkling. "Don't you remember? 'I killed him, struck him down. I don't deny it! The deed is done, I'm proud of it!' So I take it that you have read the Oresteia?"
"Oh no Monsieur Prouvaire…"
"Call me Jehan." He smiled. Éponine nodded.
"I have only read the first play of the trio. I've heard things about the other two, and I am genuinely afraid of what would happen to my favorite character."
"But you must read it!" exclaimed Jehan, his hands clasped together. "It is absolutely vital to the core idea of the play, the ending of the last play."
Éponine sighed. "If you insist Jehan. Will the fate of Clytemnestra be terrible though?"
"Oh absolutely. That vicious, vile, brutal woman…"
"I happen to like Clytemnestra." Éponine cut in coldly. She knew too well the prejudice against the queen of Argos, but she couldn't help liking her. Clytemnestra was unapologetically proud and smart. She would not let the men in her life tramped on her. Éponine aspired to be like her. Instead of being completely horrified and offended like most men Éponine knew would, Jehan instead smiled and asked her calmly.
"Would you kindly explain to me why?"
While Éponine was explaining to Jehan how Clytemnestra was inspiring to her, Courfeyrac passed by the two of them. Noticed the topic of their conversation, he chuckled.
"Sweet Jesus, once Jehan had started about one of his four dead poets there is no stopping him. Good luck Mademoiselle Éponine."
A plump middle age woman brought Éponine her dinner: beef ragout and bread. Nutritious and sufficient, Éponine silently commented in her head. Years of living in constant hunger taught her not to refuse free food. She was proud, but pride would have to yield to basic need. She tried to thank Joly but he brushed her off, saying it was unnecessary.
Éponine spent the rest of the evening talking about other epic poems and tragedies she had read with Jehan. He promised to bring her Dante's Inferno the following evening.
This was the first evening she did not spend by Marius's side. Aside from Jehan, the boys kept her busy by dropping into the conversation, teasing her or to simply sneak her some wine from their glass (Joly would frown upon this, but Joly did not see anything). Éponine started getting relaxed and let her guard down. It had been years since she could enjoy an evening, she could not remember a time when she was laughing and enjoying herself like this. She realized, that Les Amis, aside from having radical political ideals and discussions, they too were only normal human beings. They were schoolboys, concerned with classes, professors, grades, gambling, operas and women (Enjolras was the only exception to this). Their incessant chatting and good humour kept her from thinking about her own misery.
It was almost like coming to Monsieur Marius's apartment, she thought to herself.
Speaking of Marius, around 11 he rose from his spot and quietly disappeared down the stairs. This was fairly new, as Marius usually left around the same time everyone did. Éponine excused herself and immediately followed him. Wherever Marius was heading to, he was determined. He did not stop or hesitate or to look around. She followed him to the Luxembourgh until he took a quick left turn into a small alley.
Wait a minute, she thought to herself, I know where this is.
The alley led to Rue Plumet, as she had expected. She watched as Marius carefully lifted the loose latch on the gate and disappeared without a sound into the lustrous garden. Éponine slowly walked up to the gate. Her fingers latched onto the bars, holding tightly. She stood there for the longest time, staring into nothingness, deeply engulfed in her thoughts.
Though she frequently delivered their love letters, due to Monsieur Fauchelevent's strict rules when it came to his (adopted, Éponine Thenardier might add) daughter, the matter had never really crossed her mind since Marius was forever banned from seeing Cosette directly. It gave her comfort, almost a pride, in knowing that she had some sort of power over Cosette. Cosette might have his love, but she was the one who could meet him any time she wanted, she was the one who spent most time by his side. Cosette exchanged pretty words with him, but Éponine was the one who heard his voice, looked into his beautiful blue eyes, touched his fingers.
Now what, she asked herself. How long are you going to continue down this path Éponine? How long are you going to keep on deluding yourself? She felt tired, an exhaustion deep within her core that could not be fixed.
You're digging a hole for yourself here Éponine.
Éponine would probably stand there forever if it had not been for the familiar voices that were getting closer. Recognizing the voice of her father, she quickly withdrew into a small hole in the wall nearby, meanwhile keeping an ear on the quickly approaching gang.
"This is it gentlemen." She heard the hoarse voice of her father. "We make it tonight, then we won't have to worry for months. There are two women in the house, and I heard the old man was gone tonight. This should be easy."
Several other voices rumbled in agreement, of whom she recognized as Claquesous, Babet, Montparnasse and even Gueulemer.
No. Marius is still in there. They're going to kill him for sure.
Almost immediately, without a thought, Éponine stepped out of her hiding spot to greet her father.
"Hello dear Papa. Long time no see." She smiled. "How have you been?"
"What is this?" Babet grunted, while Claquesous and Montparnasse exchanged confused looks.
"Éponine, what are you doing here?" Thenardier whispered.
"Haven't you missed me Papa? I've been out a lot. What are you doing here tonight? I thought I told you this was a biscuit."
"Biscuit or not, dearest daughter, we've got business to do." Thenardier replied.
"Ah, you see, there's no reason for you to. There is nothing, absolutely nothing in this house papa."
"Be careful Éponine, you might cut yourself." Murmured Montparnasse, who lifted his sleeve to reveal the blade he had been hiding. She laughed.
"We must have faith in other people 'Parnasse."
"Get out of the way Éponine." Clasquesous stepped ahead. "We've been waiting for too long. Biscuit or not, we are going to finish this once and for all."
"Well then." She said, placing herself between Patron-Minette and the gate, with her back leaning on the cold iron bars. "Don't even think about getting in there."
"Why?" questioned Gueulemer.
"Because I don't want you to." She hissed, her eyes narrowed with a hint of anger in them. "I don't want you to rob this house tonight. Go find somewhere else."
"Let me handle this." Montparnasse stepped ahead, but she stopped him by talking out loudly.
"Step any closer and I will yell. I will yell so loud that people all the way from Montfermeil can still hear me." She was almost shouting. "I will scream. The neighbours will be woken. The police will come and arrest us all. Who cares if I'll be arrested too, or if one of you will kill me? My life is as miserable as it can be, I don't care if I will die lying on the ground, eaten by dogs afterwards. I will scream. There are six of you, but I am everyone."
Éponine opened her mouth and started screaming. Her father reached out and landed his hand on her face. Her head banged against the iron bars. She could taste the fishy, salty taste of blood on her tongue, so she wiped her mouth. However, as she had anticipated, the neighbors nearby started getting restless, they turned on their lights and some windows were being opened. Ashamed of being defeated by a seventeen year old girl, the Patron-Minette exchanged looks before they retreated back to the streets. Meanwhile, Éponine figured the noise must have alarmed Marius some how so she followed them a few moments later.
That was close, she thought to herself. This meant that tonight she could not go home to sleep. Not that she had been going home to sleep for a while; she had been crashing at Enjolras's apartment for two consecutive days, though one was unintentional. It was already very late, but it hardly mattered to Enjolras who usually worked all night. However she could not put herself at his mercy anymore, she did not want to bother the man. Besides, she was almost certain he would notice her bloody mouth as well as the bruise which was beginning to form around the corner of her mouth. She could stop going to les amis meetings for several days till the bruise faded, but she could not face the judgmental and pitiful look on Enjolras's face anymore. He respected her, and he wouldn't ask too many questions before she was comfortable answering them, but she knew that look in his eyes. The look that asked a million questions before they were voiced, the look that seemed to ask why is your life so terrible. No, she did not want that look. She wanted solitude, to go lick her wounds alone.
Another night spent under the bridge, she lamented, remembering the comfort and softness that a bed offered two nights before.
If only you knew what I would do for you pretty boy. Éponine bitterly laugh. But then again, it's probably better that you don't.