Disclaimer: I do not own the Big Bang Theory or Spongebob Squarepants
The scene changed with Sheldon and Amy now in a coffee shop. So far their plans with selling chocolate has not been going so well. They both were drinking water while thinking about what has been going on.
"I don't get it, we have been doing a stinky stink job so far with this chocolate selling thing. What we need is a new approach," Sheldon commented.
Amy took her time to think, and an idea popped up in her head.
"I got it, lets get naked," Amy exclaimed.
"No, lets save that for when we're selling real estate," Sheldon replied, "now get our heads cleared up, why did Lesile sell us those candy bar bags?"
"I believe she was calling us medicore," Amy answered.
"That's right, she made us fell special," said Sheldon.
"That's a point I guess I could take," Amy said, "I'M GOING TO BUY MORE BAGS!"
"WAIT AMY," Sheldon cried as Amy dashed out of the coffee shop only to freeze right in the middle of her tracks, "Why don't we try being nice."
"Afermative," Amy replied.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were now approaching another person's apartment preparing their technique of being nice.
"Remember Amy, flatter the customer, make the customer fell good," Sheldon told Amy "(knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer."
The door opened, and it was Sheldon's nemesis Barry Kripkie wearing a blue plaid shirt, brown pants, and brown shoes.
"Helwo," Barry replied.
"I love you," Amy replied.
Barry slammed the door close feeling scared. Amy pretty much overdid it right there.
"I think you took it an intsy bit there Amy, let me try," Sheldon said, "(knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer."
"Pwease go," Barry said after slightly opening the door.
"I apologize for Amy's behavior Kripkie, how are you doing," Sheldon asked.
"How am I dowing," Barry said feeling all puzzled.
"Want to buy some chocolate," Sheldon responded holding out a chocolate bar.
"We got him now," Amy exclaimed.
"Sowwy, chocowate has sugor, and sugor tuwruns into bubbwy fat, isn't that wight wover girl," Barry said.
"It tickles," Amy said just standing there like nothing is going on.
"As you can see, me and chocowate no wonger hang," Barry said showing Sheldon and Amy a picture of him at age 12.
Barry was wearing the same clothes, only he looked very fat.
"You can keep that for fiwve bucks," Barry said.
"I'll take ten," Amy exclaimed.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were walking along the sidewalk with all of the chocolate bars that haven't been sold yet.
"We haven't sold one chocolate bar all day," Sheldon said.
"Wha," Amy replied looking at the pictures of Barry at age 12
"I got a feeling that we may be too distracted," Sheldon suggested.
"Huh," Amy replied still looking at the photos.
"Lets make a pact that at the next place we go we keep ourselves completely focused," Sheldon said, "what do you say Amy."
"Um, what were you saying," Amy asked still feeling distracted.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were approaching the front of the comic book store as they were about to meet their next customer.
"Remember Amy, focus," Sheldon told Amy, "(knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer."
Stuart came out wearing a blue plaid shirt, blue pants, and blue sneakers.
"Sheldon, this is a public place. You don't need to knock," Stuart said.
"Sorry Stuart, but we're selling chocolate bars," Sheldon said holding up a chocolate bar.
Amy started to get up close giving Stuart a very disturbing look. Stuart was starting to feel frightened by Amy's stare.
"Why is your girlfriend staring at me," Stuart asked.
"Focusing," Amy replied.
"Back off," Stuart screamed slamming the door on Amy's face.
"That was a very nice place you got there," Amy told Stuart.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy continue to walk down the sidewalk while Amy was eating a chocolate bar from her bag. So far no progress has been made in selling chocolate.
"I don't get, there must be something we're not getting in on this selling game. I mean everyone else is doing it, I mean look at that," Sheldon said pointing to a billboard.
The billboard read Pringles, once you pop the fun don't stop.
"Pringles, once you pop, the fun won't stop," Amy said.
"I had Pringles, and when I popped the lid open, I didn't have fun at all," Sheldon said.
"Maybe because you closed the lid afterwards," Amy stated.
"They sell a million tubes of those not fun chips a day, and they think they can get a lot of money from them," Sheldon protested.
"Maybe they wouldn't get so much money if they didn't stretch the truth," Amy said.
"Good idea Amy Farrah Fowler, we'll stretch the truth," Sheldon said.
Then they heard Raj screaming chocolate out in the distance yet again. The two fled before he could show up.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were approaching the porch of Howard's house. They were right at their front door ready to sell the chocolate bars as they planned.
"Alright, I'll sweet talk the customer, and then you come in for the kill," Sheldon said.
"Would you like me to tackle him to the ground, or be challenged to a fight," Amy asked.
"It's a metaphor Amy, you then deliver the message that will influence the customer to buy the chocolater," Sheldon explained.
"Afermative," Amy replied.
Sheldon was about to knock, but Amy moved to the side and rang the doorbell.
"HOWARD GET THE DOOR," his mother screamed.
"I KNOW I HAVE TO GET THE DOOR, I HEARD THE DOORBELL YOU CRAZY OLD LADY," Howard screamed.
Howard opened the door, and he was dressed in his yellow button up shirt, black pants, and black shoes.
"Hello there, young man, we're selling chocolate. Is your mother home," Sheldon asked.
"Howard who is it," Howard's mom screamed.
"It's Sheldon and Amy, they're selling chocolate," Howard screamed.
"I can't hear you, I'm on the toilet," Howard's mom screamed.
"They're selling chocolate," Howard screamed.
"Selling what, they're selling cargo pants," Howard's mom screamed.
"NO YOUR CRAZY DEAF LADY, THEY'RE SELLING CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE," Howard screamed.
"Oh yeah, I remember chocolate. Sweet, sweet, sweet, chocolate. I always hated chocolate," Howard's mom screamed.
"No you don't, you just forgotten how much you love chocolate because you have lost your damn mind," Howard screamed to his mother.
Sheldon and Amy looked pretty dazzled as they were hearing Howard and his mother screaming.
"My dear friend, this chocolate isn't for eating, it's for," Sheldon said trying to think of a lie that he could use.
"You rub it on your skin, and you get to live forever," Amy retorted.
Howard was starting to freak out after he heard chocolate could make someone live forever.
"No, dear lord no. I will give you anything you want, don't you even think about giving my mother one of those eternal life bars," Howard said freaking out.
"Live forever you say, maybe I'll live long enough to see them get rid of those darn computer things! I'll take one," Howard's mom screamed.
Sheldon handed Howard a chocolate bar, and gave Sheldon a dollar. Howard was pretty ticked off with Sheldon.
"Howard, you better get in here! I'm not getting any younger! Run that god damn chocolate on me," Howard's mom screamed.
"I hate you both," Howard muttered as he slammed the door shut.
"If keep stretching the truth like this, we'll be fancy living in no time," Sheldon happily said.
"Hooray for lying," Amy exclaimed.
(Atom effect-scene change)
"It'll make your hair grow," Sheldon told the customer who was bald.
"Great, my wife's trying to grow a beard," the customer said giving Sheldon a couple of bucks.
"It'll make you sound smarter," Sheldon told the customer who was a hillbillie.
"I'll take twenty," said the customer holding a couple of bucks.
"It'll stop your face from getting any ugler," Amy said.
"Just in time," said the customer who was another replica of Amy.
"They'll make you fly," Sheldon said.
"You'll fall in love," Amy said
"They'll bring world peace," Sheldon said
"You'll walk through walls," Amy said.
"You'll rule the world," Sheldon screamed
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were now at the front door of another apartment now wearing bandages, and cast while standing on crutches. What it appeared Sheldon and Amy were trying to do was pretend they were in serious condition to fool the customer.
"This is going to be our best lie yet," Amy happily said.
"I know what you're saying Amy Farrah Powler, once this guy or girl sees what has happened to us, he or she will feel so sorry for us that he or she will buy all of our chocolate," Sheldon stated. "(knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer, (knock)(knock)(knock) customer."
"May I help you," the customer asked.
"Would you care for some chocolate, we need money for an operation," Sheldon told the customer.
"I don't know if I can buy some chocolate after what I've dealt with my whole life," the customer said.
The customer finally opened the door only to reveal it was a woman covered in bandages, and had life support materials. Sheldon and Amy were very surprised at what they just saw.
"What happened to you two," the woman asked.
"Um...we..were...hit by a bus," Amy said.
"It's better than what I had to deal with, I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms, and then I stay awake in agony until my heart attacks to put me to sleep," the woman explained.
Sheldon and Amy were feeling so sorry for the woman, and then one of the cords snapped causing the woman to fall flat on the floor on her face.
"OH MY GOD," Amy cried.
Sheldon and Amy decided to stop playing around, and help the woman back up on her feet. They carefully brought her back inside as she was still in critical condition.
"You poor thing, what are the probabilites of getting both glass bones and paper skin," Sheldon questioned.
"Is there anything we can do for you," Amy asked.
"Well, there is one thing," the woman said, "my medical bills are extremely high, and I have been keeping myself alive by buying...chocolate."
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy were leaving the apartment carrying crates of chocolate bars, and the woman stood at her window watching them leave carrying the crates.
"Its so good to get help from a group of class A suckerunies like those two, ha ha," said the woman who turned out to be Lesile Winkle.
Sheldon and Amy were struggling carrying the crates of chocolate bars, and they were also feeling disappointment.
"I know it was nice of us to help that woman out, but there's no one else in Pasadena we can sell these chocolate bars to," Sheldon said dropping the crate on the ground, "lets face it Amy, were failures."
Amy also sat her crate on the ground and just sat on it like a chair as she was also feeling disappointed.
"We should just change our names to why and bother," Sheldon said.
With the two sitting in shame, Raj pops out of nowhere still feeling the rage from when they were selling him chocolate.
"CHOCOLATE," Raj screamed.
Sheldon and Amy were now very frightened as they got together hugging each other in fear on the ground.
"Please don't kill us," Amy stuttered.
"Yeah, she's already killing me by hugging me," Sheldon panicked.
"HA HA HA HA HA! I'VE BEEN CHASING YOU TWO THROUGH TOWN ALL DAY, AND NOW THAT I GOT YOU RIGHT WHERE I WANT, I want to buy all of your chocolate," Raj said holding a buttload of cash.
Sheldon and Amy were stunned with what they just heard, and Sheldon backed away from Amy after hugging her.
"Thank you for your patronage," Sheldon said.
(Atom effect-scene change)
Sheldon and Amy now had a wheelbarrow full of money, and they had no idea where they got a wheelbarrow from. The two now had a whole bunch of money.
"So are we living the fancy life," Amy asked.
"Not yet, first we got to spend all the money," Sheldon pointed out to Amy.
"On what," Amy said.
Sheldon took his time thinking on what they were going to do with the money,
(Atom effect-scene change)
Leonard and Penny were inside a fancy restraunt as they were about to have a dinner date together. Leonard was wearing a fancy black suit while Penny wore a black dress.
"Table for two please," Leonard told the waiter.
"I'm so sorry sir, but tonight the entire restraunt has been brought out," the waiter said.
"What do they mean the entire restraunt was brought out," Penny questioned.
"But it's my only night to be fancy, who could've brought out the entire restraunt," Leonard asked.
"A bunch of rich swags and their dates," the waiter answered.
Sheldon and Amy were all dressed very fancy, and for some reason they had Howard and his mother who was finally shown. She was fat and as expected, had a mustace.
"So, how long have you two known each other," Sheldon asked.
"What did you say," Howard's mom questioned.
"My god, I hate my life," Howard said in shame.
THE END