Chapter fourteen.
It's well after midnight when Aislinn is relieved from her duties and Mordred decides to walk her home. The crescent moon is covered by a few clouds casting an eerie glow as they walk down the steps into the citadel, the air is crisp and there are subtle hint of the forth coming spring in the air. "You know sometimes I forget how much we have grown up" she says as their steps sync "and how sometimes we're forced to" she adds smiling to herself. Mordred looks at her "do you remember how on nights like this our parents would let us stay up and chart stars?" he asks casting his gaze up to the stars which glow and twinkle against the dark night sky.
"I lost count of how many times we did that" she says reminiscently smiling at the memory of both their families sitting under the stars by the river "hey Lin look" he says softly and without thinking. Aislinn stops but doesn't pick up on the fact that Mordred just called her Lin, or maybe she did but she had chosen to ignore it either way it didn't matter all he wanted to do was show her something. Aislinn comes back to Mordred's side and glances up at the stars but can't see what he is referring to "it would help if I knew what I was looking at" she says glancing at him.
Mordred grabs her hand and fixes her index finger so it's pointing forward, he raises their hands so she is pointing upwards then positions her hand just under a constellation "can you see it?" he asks. She squints tracing imaginary lines between some stars until they join up "the scorpion" she says when she realizes what it is "if I remember correctly that was the first pattern my father ever showed me." Mordred lowers her hand back to their sides but doesn't make a notion to let go of it "Aislinn, I'm sorry" he says and in the moonlight he can see her smile "it's alright, it's just hard the anniversary of their death is coming up and I always get upset around then."
"I know how it feels" he says placing an arm around her "we should do that again sometime" Aislinn says some joy returning to her voice as Mordred begins to continue them on down the path. "If you like, there are a lot of this we still have to do" he says and he feels her arm snake around his waist "I'm looking forward to it" she tells him resting her heard on his shoulder. They continue walking in silence for another minute or so until Mordred reaches her front door and opens it for her "ladies first" he says laughing and she bows at him walking through her front door.
Aislinn goes and lights the candles around the main room engulfing the darkness until only shadows dance around the outskirts of the walls. Mordred seats himself at her table and picks up the book she left there "one thousand herbs and their uses" he says pursing his lips "surely Aislinn you don't need that." Aislinn laughs seating herself across from him "only a bit of light reading" she says smiling at him as she unravels her braid shaking her hair loose. "So Merlin told me something interesting" Mordred says his voice almost void of emotion "oh yeah?" she questions taking her book from him "yeah, Aislinn why didn't you tell me about the nightmares?" he asks.
She groans running her hand through her hair letting a few red strands fall onto the table "it isn't that important" she says not wishing for him to delve any further but Mordred does to her despair. "Aislinn it does, if you're not sleeping you're going to become ill" he says sitting forward taking her hand "you know you can tell me anything" she smiles a little at him but avoids his gaze. "I know you don't like talking about your emotions or anything about you really" he says chuckling "and you don't have to but I'd like to know" Aislinn sighs trying to think of the right way to form her sentences but nothing is coming to her.
"They are just so real, I can feel everything and sometimes I am sleeping and I can feel rope around my neck and dried blood" she says her voice dropping "it's like I'm back there and I can hear Morgana's laugh" the expression on her face is one he's never seen before. Mordred swallows "I'm sorry" he says and it's all he can think of to say "don't feel sorry, I'd just love some sleep" she says chuckling, Mordred gets up from his seat forcing her to her feet as he goes. "Sleep sounds brilliant" he says spinning her under his arm as he leads her towards her bed in the deep recesses of his mind; a place where he dare not go he might have other intentions but now they are not relevant.
Aislinn smiles and he's quite sure he has never seen her look more beautiful but every time he sees her she proves him wrong. "Go get changed, I'll put the candles out" he says letting go of her and as she disappears into her room. When he comes back she is changed into her night gown brushing her hair and just like he knew she proved him wrong again. Just like the time he woke up next to her seeing her in her night gown felt like he was breaking some sort of law or a sacred bond. "What?" she asks shuffling on her feet before him and he has to remember how to breathe again "huh? Oh, nothing" he says smiling exhaling.
Mordred undoes the straps on his armour and places them in the corner of a room then pulls his chainmail over his head and places it with his armour his red undershirt joining them a few seconds later along with his boots. Aislinn is curled up on her bed knees bowed up against her chest watching him "never knew it was this easy to get you in bed" she laughs. Mordred looks at her for a moment before he gives her one of his smirks "sorry, I'm just too tired for this" Aislinn smiles and falls back onto her pillow "yeah you're not sorry are you?" he asks seating himself down and leaning on his elbow.
Aislinn stretches a little "no you're right, I'm not" she says yawning before she slides under the covers "are you sure you want to stay here tonight?" she asks him as he joins her under the bed sheets. "Well I'm not walking back to the castle" he says "it's too far" he tells her resting his cheek against his hand "but yet you walked here" she comments looking up at him "yeah but I had a purpose" Mordred chuckles. Aislinn rolls her eyes "oh yeah, by the way where is my kiss?" he asks his face remaining neutral through the entire sentence.
"You can't just-"
"I won didn't I?" he questions but needs no answers "and I remember a certain red haired woman who said that if I won a match she would kiss me and if I won more than one-" Aislinn throws her hands up silencing him. Mordred ignores her and presses on "and if I won more than one.." he begins again but she cuts him off again. "I didn't say anything about winning more than one and with the way you're going you'll get absolutely none" she hisses rolling over to face away from him "Aislinn" he pleads inching towards her placing his arm around her. "Mordred" she says mocking his appeal to her trying not to laugh.
"Come on, just one" he laughs moving his hand down to her waist beginning to tickle her. Aislinn squeals withering around under him "Mordred!" she yelps trying to push his hands away from her but he doesn't yield to her plea "sto-" she gasps "stop it! Mordred!" she shrieks flinging her feet around. Aislinn brushes some hair back from her face once he stops tickling her "do that again and you'll die" she breathes taking hold of his hand to make sure he doesn't do it again. "Give me my kiss" he orders smiling a little "if I do will you stop tickling me?" she asks he remains silent for a few moments his expression one of deep thought.
"Alright" he whispers lowering his face towards hers. Mordred's lips skim over hers before he presses down against her own, Aislinn places her hand against his chest slightly gripping onto his shirt. She feels his tongue glide over her bottom lip and she shivers a little Mordred moves his hand down to her waist. He is the first to pull away "so how many times have you threatened to kill me?" he asks breathlessly Aislinn giggles "this year or this week?" Mordred scoffs and settles down "just shut up and go to sleep" he commands.
It feels like it's only been five minutes since he closed his eyes and it feels like he has only been asleep five minutes when he's woken by Aislinn's leg ramming into his ribs. Momentarily he's winded and confused as to why she would kick him until he hears her whimpering, her leg flings out again hitting him. He jumps up from the bed grabbing one of the lit candles racing back to her bedside "Aislinn" he whispers shaking her but she doesn't answer him. Mordred places the candle on the table and shakes her again but just like the first time she in unresponsive "Aislinn!" he says louder this time and she jolts, flinging her hand out "let me go!" she screams.
Aislinn's eyes fling open her features shrouded in confusion and her eyes look watery against the soft candlelight "wh..Mord-" she says exhaling as her eyes dart around and it's clear to him she has forgotten where she is. "What...what happened" she asks gripping his arms pulling herself into a kneeling position "you were having a nightmare" he says sympathetically brushing her hair back off her face. The confusion on her face disappears and her face turns blank, she doesn't answer him all she does is remain silent her eyes avoiding his own.
Mordred moves his hand slowly from her face instead taking her hand waiting for her to speak but when she doesn't he speaks for her "you need to get some rest" he tells her observing her for a moment. "Usually when I have a nightmare I can't get back to sleep" Aislinn whispers pulling her hand out of his grasp; for some reason there is this immense shame that's hanging over her. Something like this shouldn't be happening, to her or to anyone, this was a sign of weakness – a sign she wasn't strong enough. Mordred moves back onto the bed repositioning the pillow "come 'ere" he says holding his arms open waiting for her to move.
Almost reluctantly she moves towards him when she is close enough he wraps her arms around her waist pulling her in closer. Although he can't see her face he can guess what expression is on her face, possibly the same one she had on it a few seconds ago one of emptiness, a hollow expression. He hadn't seen that look on her face for many years, it was the same one he had seen when they were younger, when her parents had been killed. For some reason all the pain he had felt for her then comes flooding back upon him like a tidal wave. He had watched her – a girl of only eight grieve over the loss of her family, he had seen her break down midsentence in tears and he had seen her not eat for weeks.
It was the same feeling he had now that he had felt then. Mordred rests his face against her back the rivets of her spine resting against his nose changing the pressure with each breath. Aislinn shifts a little and Mordred lifts his head up hesitating for a moment before he brushes her hair back behind her ear running his finger down the skin on her neck. She moves her head so she can see him, the same look still plastered on her face "what are you doing?" she asks her eyes darting over what she can see of him. "I don't know" he says running his finger back up her neck admiring the colour and the freckles on her skin.
"You have beautiful skin" he says glancing up at her and he can see the start of a smile starting to form on her lips but it doesn't go further than that. "Just another thing to add to the list of beautiful things about you" he whispers kissing the same spot on her neck where his finger had been moments ago. "I think you're blind" she says her voice strained "no, my vision is perfectly fine" he tells her kissing her neck again. All he wants to do is comfort her and drown out his confusion because he doesn't know what's wrong but all he can think of doing is kissing her and it's all he wants to do.
She goes to say something but is distracted by his lips against her neck "I doubt it" she mutters closing her eyes allowing him to pay attention to her neck. "mhh hmm" Mordred mumbles moving his lips up over her jaw bringing himself onto his knees so he can kiss her better. He meant what he said; he always meant it when he called her beautiful because that's what she was beautiful. She was like the first flower in spring or the first star of the night; he could compare her to a lot of things a sunrise, a sunset the list was endless. He brings his lips to hers straightening himself up against her running his hand down her neck continuing until his hand rests at her side.
When he feels her hand against his at her waist his heart stops and he is scared she will push him away but he honestly wouldn't blame her if she did. Aislinn was distressed and having Mordred kissing her probably wasn't the best idea but when she didn't push him away he calmed down a little. Despite that he was still as nervous as all hell and if he didn't control his movement's he'd be shaking, she always turned him into a nervous stuttering child again. Aislinn's hand moves from his and runs up his abdomen to the middle of his chest where she pulls on his shirt pulling away for a moments breath.
"You can push me away if you like" he whispers placing her hand on her cheek before he brushes his hand across her jaw through her hair "why would I do that?" she asks gently placing her lips back his own. Aislinn chews on his bottom lip before she drags her lips down across his jaw and to his neck. Her lips against his skin feel like cotton tickling the skin as she plants kisses in a wet line, moments later he feels an unexpected pierce in his skin and he lets out a small gasp. It takes him a few seconds to realize that she bit him but he didn't expect to like being bitten so much and she must read his reaction because she bites down on his neck again.
Mordred tangles his fingers in her hair as she drags her teeth down the rest of his neck, leaving red marks stopping above his collar bone. His breathing has become heavy, dazed by her and her touch. Mordred didn't know that her touch was able to do this to him, to drive him wild with ecstasy and longing. Aislinn's hand travels up under his shirt stopping at his chest; he grabs her thighs pulling her on top of him and as he does so finds her lips again. She digs her nails into his chest pushing herself against him, Mordred runs his lip over her bottom lip before forcing them apart with his tongue.
She grabs his shirt and slides it up over his head, separating them momentarily before it slides off the bed and onto the floor. He's warm, his entire body a warm numbness and can feel himself beginning to sweat. "You still wear it" Aislinn says running her hand over his collar bones down the silver chain of his necklace, he glances down only able to see the onyx stone against his skin. "Yeah, I always wear it" he says smiling "I told you that once before" Aislinn smiles letting her fingers linger over the metal "that's right, but I don't listen to you." He chuckles grabbing her hand and kissing it.
"Gee, thanks" he whispers causing her to laugh a little "you're welcome" she remarks kissing him once more before he runs his hand down her spine. Mordred chooses to even the playing field pulling her night gown off her almost ferociously but he can't stop himself. Unlike him, she's cold – the exact opposite and despite how heated he feels she is like ice, or something close to it and when he touches her he's somewhat convinced she will melt. "You're so cold" he whispers gradually sliding his fingers over her arm, goose bumps following seconds later "I'm always cold" she admits watching his fingers trail over her skin before she grabs them and kisses his palm.
For a few moments he looks over her and the shadows dancing across it, the freckles spotted across her face and the rest of her body and now, with what she has shown him beautiful is an understatement.