"Are you upset that Mister Lonely Boy is still in your group?" – Dorota walks into her room, where she sits by the window, staring outside and the room is a mess.
"No" – She answers quietly.
"Then what is it?"
"Nothing, I just have so much to do, my exams are just around the corner and…"
"Miss Blair. Your room is never dirty, look this mess…"
"Well if you were doing your job right, it wouldn't have been that way" – She replies but the strictness in her voice is absent.
"You can tell Dorota. Did Mister Humphrey upset you?"
"Yes" – She barks. – "YES"
"Oh…" – Dorota starts picking up the shoes from the floor.
"He has the decency to yell in my face and…" – She has no arguments because she knows that he was right.
"Miss Blair, don't get mad, but I don't think Mister Humphrey would ever say anything to hurt you"
"Yeah, well he did" – She stands up from the window bench and starts helping Dorota tidying her room.
…
Chuck comes one day, God knows from where and he gives her a necklace with a ring on it, promising her that one day, not too far from then it'd be on her finger. She promises him that she will always wear it. She doesn't tell him anything about Humphrey and the scene they had in college.
The following days she is keeping as low profile on college as she can. She doesn't wear clothes that would draw attention on her, but dresses like an actual student. More laid back pants, jeans, jackets, shoes…She doesn't try to make new friends, and she just goes there with one goal, to study and not to fool around.
Until one day a girl gives her an invitation for a student party in some bar nearby NYU, and she is sure she won't go. But little she knows that she will end up exactly there.
…
She attends one of the most boring dinner parties in a restaurant with her mother, Cyrus and friends of theirs who happen to be probably the most boring snobs she has ever met. She can't even make it till the end of the dinner, she lies that she doesn't feel well and excuses herself. Eleanor calls her a town car and she's gone.
She remembers about that party her classmate told her about, and even though she's overdressed for that, she tells her driver to get her there. She knows she feels like mingling with people even if that means that she'll have to endure college conversations and silly accents.
…
Some of the students in her group are welcoming her and hugging her, which bothers her but feels ok in the same time, because she thought nobody actually knew her name. She wears long deep green silky dress that floats around her, not suitable for the party but still people are admiring her. The necklace with the ring is on her neck of course. There are two options – she'll either stay there and talk nonsense to some of her classmates, excuse herself after half an hour and go, or get herself a drink and gets the best out of a mediocre college party.
…
She gets slightly tipsy, few of the girls in her group are giggling and worshiping her dress, telling her how flawless her style is and one of them spots the ring on the necklace. They can't stop cackling and screaming when she tells them the story about her and Chuck and one of them actually knows who he is, so compliments her on her choice. She doesn't feel excited or happy. That's when she orders another drink.
…
In the steamy and semi dark bar, she spots the mop hair of Humphrey and rolls her eyes.
"Another" – She tells the bartender who refills her glass of vodka.
"Is there a problem" – One of the girls asks.
"No, just a face I can't stand. From high school you know" – The girls turn around to the direction where Humphrey stays with some guys.
"Oh my God, you know Dan Humphrey?" – They giggle.
"Yes" – She sighs and takes a long sip.
"He is one of the most talented guys in our group and for sure one of the most handsome ones" – The first girl says and the rest of them agree with her. All Blair can say is "argh". But she knows they're right. – "He was dating that blond heiress, but I think he's single again"
"Don't care" – Blair says, and feels that her eyes can't hold open. As the girls are babbling about Rufus and Lily's history and the possible incestuous relationship Dan had with Serena, she finishes her glass, gets her purse and leaves the bar, trying to find a way not to meet Dan as she walks to the exit.
Her feet are betraying her, she knows that her makeup isn't perfect after probably six glasses of vodka and her eyes don't seem to stay open even though she tries. She closes and opens them very slowly and with each step she makes, she feels like the whole place is part of a dream.
Someone holds her arm as she walks out of the bar and she thinks that moments like that, when you go out from a place where the air is stall and smells like cigarettes and you breathe in clean air, are making life worth living.
"Are you ok?" – The guy asks her as he helps her sit on a flowerpot.
"Call me a cab" – She grunts, trying to get the phone out of her purse.
"But the night is young, and you are too pretty to go home" – He uses a phrase that makes her feel even more like vomiting.
"I'll get myself a cab" – She mumbles as she gets the phone out of her purse, yet she doesn't know why she does it. When she tries to stand on her feet, she realizes it'll be a hard mission.
"Come on, let me help you" – The guy puts his arm around her waist – "You must be some rich lady, aren't you…this fancy dress is very lovely"- He whispers in her ear as she tries to get rid of him, but his grip is too strong for her to fight in that condition.
"Leave me alone" – She cries. – "Take your filthy hands off my Stella McCartney, you sick animal" – She digs her nails into his hand.
The next thing she sees is the guy holding his nose with his two palms and getting dragged away by the security. Someone says "You should go, before this thing gets bigger, he's the owner's kid". She can't see in the crowd who are those people. The same voice adds "You know her, take her home"
"Come on Waldorf" – He takes her by her hand and stops a cab.
…
"What are you doing?" – She doesn't move when he tries to sit next to her.
"You think you're able to tell your address?" – He knows how stubborn she can be so he goes around the car and sits inside. The cab takes off. – "You're aware that you might end up raped like this?" – He says as she turns her head to the window. – "Are you listening to me?"
"Unfortunately" – She sighs.
"And what were you doing alone there"
"Alone? Please?" – She still doesn't look at him. – "I was there with friends"
"You and I both know that's not true. You either despise them or don't know their existence. So you were bored…" – He notices the necklace with the engagement ring on it. – "What's that?" – He changes the topic feeling his stomach clenching.
"You know what it is" – She snaps, her face still turned towards the window.
"It should be on your finger you know"
"I'll wear it wherever I want"
"You know it should keep you tuned right?"
"We love each other so whenever it happens it'll happen"
They stay quiet till the cab stops in front of Blair's building. She can barely get out of the cab so he helps her to get out of there as a decent lady.
In the elevator she can't stand on her feet so she slides down the wall and sits down.
"It's your floor, get up" – He says. She raises her eyes towards him.
"Cut that hair" – She says, trying to get up and not succeeding till he gives her a hand.
"Is Dorota here?" – He holds her waist firmly. – "You need coffee"
"I need to die" – She whines.
"Coffee first" – He helps her lie down on the sofa and goes in the kitchen to prepare coffee for her. – "Sit up, you have to drink this"
Her hair is messy, the makeup is no longer visible, except the remains of the mascara around her eyes, the necklace with the ring is behind the back. She sits up with effort.
"Why are you…doing this?"- She takes a sip and burns her lips. – "You could have brought me lava instead" – She cries holding her lips.
"You're welcome" – He says and prepares to go.
"Wait" – She says. – "Thank you" – It's a miracle she manages to stand still on her feet and makes few insecure steps towards him. - "I'm avoiding you on purpose, and you know that, but…thank you…for…thank you!" – She makes another step, lifts herself a bit, the closeness of his face still very familiar and she presses a soft kiss on his cheek almost on his jaw, because he moves away.
"It's ok…" – The sensation of her lips on his skin makes him shut his eyes. His heart races, he is sure he doesn't breathe and he knows he should go away from there immediately. He walks to the elevator doors presses the button. – "You're too young for another marriage" – He says for himself but she hears him.
"It's the way it should be"
"Even you don't believe in that" – He looks at her, his eyes shinier and bigger than ever, his lips a bit opened like he wants to say something else and that's when she realizes she's sober. She blinks and the ding from the elevator tells her that he left.
She doesn't sleep with the necklace on her neck that night.
In the morning it all comes back to her and she realizes that guy who punched the anonymous who was bothering her, was actually Dan.
Tbc