My eyes sting as I open them to mornings sun, it reflects off a mirror on the opposite side of the room. I'm wondering why my body feels so heavy, and then I remember. I have a small figure lying across my chest, arms and hair splayed out. She stirs on top of me and her eyes eventually crack open, her beautiful brown ones meeting mine. Her brow creases a fraction in confusion, and then last night seems to come back to her. I was waiting for her alarm that we had fall asleep together to kick in. But once her confusion passed she simply smiled, relaxed and let out a croaky "Hi"
"Morning beautiful" I say closing my eyes and laying my head back. I'm not very good in the morning and we didn't exactly sleep for very long. I lay there slowly waking up and my thoughts coming back to me. I think I should make Bella breakfast in bed, start get day off positive. But before I can move a thought crosses my mind.
"Are your parents home? Wont it look a little sketchy me being here?" I say with slight alarm in my voice; I don't want to get her in trouble.
"My mum and dad would have left for work by now. So you don't have to rush off, unless you want too. Sorry I didn't mean to keep you captive last night." She starts talking fast and faster as she goes on. I think now she has woken up she is getting embarrassed and flustered. Though she still doesn't lift her head off of my chest as she speaks which makes me feel better.
"I'm in no rush to leave, and I wanted to stay last night. You needed someone to be with you, and it made me feel good you wanted me to be the one to comfort you." I smile to myself over that little fact. And what makes me feel ever better is when she buries her face into my chest and says "I need you Edward, you make me feel better" I wrap my arms around her and hug her to me tighter than before. We lay like that for a few more minutes then I hear her stomach growl. I decide she needs breakfast so I use all the strength I have to get myself out of bed. She looks a little hurt when I turn to look at her.
"Are you leaving?" She says, her voice confirms her upset.
"No silly, I'm going to go make you some breakfast." I smile sitting on the edge of her bed. She sits up too and looks at me. "What did I do to deserve you Edward? Are you some fallen angel who will disappear soon?" I close my eyes and place my forehead against hers. "No Bella I am no angel, and I think you are a little confused or sleep deprived. It's what I did to deserve you" My heart is beating so fast I think it's going to jump right out my chest. I want to kiss her so badly and she hasn't pulled away yet. I don't know how long we sit there for but my phone buzzes bringing me out of my trance caused by Bella's sweet smell. I sigh and pull back and I could swear I hear Bella whimper a little in protest. It's just Jasper checking to make sure I'm still alive. We normally don't go this long without talking. I put my phone back into my pocket and turn back around to look at Bella.
"What would you like for breakfast? Tea is obviously a given, but what would you like to eat?" I say while standing up, trying to keep my distance. If I keep getting close my self control will soon cave and I may do something she regrets me doing.
"Tea please and some toast with butter. You are really sweet for doing this" I stand smiling down at her, god she is beautiful. I leave her sat on her bed and head downstairs. I walk straight through to her kitchen and fill the kettle. I take the bread out of the breadbin and walk over to the toaster. While everything is doing I take a second to think about last night.
Bella wanted me to stay and comfort her, she even let me sleep in her bed. Does she feel something for me? It feels like it, and if she doesn't can I stay and watch her be treated this way. Can I stand by and feel the pain of her being with someone else when I so desperately want to be with her? I don't know if I could bear the pain but I couldn't let her go either. She was too important to me and meant too much. If she did like me, would she leave Jacob? Or would she be too scared of what he would do in retaliation? I would protect her, if he ever tried hurting her. Before I can think too much about it the kettle goes off and the toast pops up. Good timing Edward, I stir the tea and let it brew while I butter the toast. Soon I carry her food upstairs on a small tray and lightly kick the door open with my toe. She is still sat on the bed, legs crossed and smiling up at me. That smile could cause wars, bring peace and break any man. I walk over, placing the tray on her bedside table. I pick up my tea, bringing it to my lips. She murmurs a thank you, but she sounds upset.
"What's wrong beautiful?" I said with worry and concern lacing my voice.
"I need to end things with Jacob but I'm not sure how to" This news both excites me and worries me. I'm scared for her, Jacob doesn't seem above lashing out when he hears what she says. So this makes me fear she will hurt her, and I can't let that happen.
"Can I ask why you want to end things? Don't get me wrong I think you need to. You can do so much better than him and you deserve to be treated better. I'm just curious" I say looking her straight in the eye. She looks so sad, like she is going to cry.
"Hey hey beautiful don't you cry" I wipe my thumb under her eye catching her tears before they fall. I gently grab her hands and pull her to stand just at the side of the bed. I bend my knees and hug her round her waist. I pull her to me and bury my face in her hair. I try make soothing noises and just hold her. "You don't have to tell me, I didn't mean to upset you I'm sorry"
"No you haven't upset me" She sobs into my shoulder "I'm so embarrassed at myself that I fell for his lies. That I've put myself through this again and I'm happy and sad and embarrassed." She continues to sob while I try soothing her. But after a while she stops and pulls her head back. She stares at me dead in the eyes, I can't move I'm like a deer caught in the headlights.
"Can I ask you something Edward?" She says without breaking eye contact. I nod because I'm not sure I could find my voice if I tried.
"How do you feel about me? In all honesty?" She stares at me waiting for my answer. I'm not sure what to say. Do I tell her how I truly feel? What if she tells me to leave because she doesn't want to have some guy hung up on her following her around? But what if by some miracle she likes me back? Is it worth the rejection? So many questions rolling around in my head. My mouth doesn't seem to want to work, but my body takes over. My hands are still on her hips from our hug, so I pull her a little closer. I tighten my grip on her hips and wait for her response. She looks at my hands and takes her bottom lip between her teeth. Her gaze slowly moves up to mine but then moves back down to my lips. I know in that second what I'm going to do and it will be worth it.
"You Bella, are everything to me. I want to be the one you choose, the one to treat you right." I would have said more but before I can finish Bella's mouth is on mine. She kisses me hard and urgently, fisting her hands in my hair. Once my mind catches up to what is happening I moan and grab hold of her thighs picking up and wrapping her legs around me. With my hands on her bum I hoist her up and use my free hand cradle her fast. I start walking forwards and soon my shins are touching the bed. Bella's mouth is everywhere, on my neck, jaw, lips and ears. We are both moaning loudly and a small voice in the back of my head thanks god her parents aren't home. I lower her onto the bed but keep her legs wrapped round me. I then go to work, biting and nibbling her neck and ears. Her hands dig hungrily into my back, pulling me closer to her. I can't get enough of her, I'm like a man who has been starved for weeks and now been shown a banquet. So many things I want to do, but what to do first? I move my mouth back up to her lips, earning a moan from her as I take her bottom lip between my teeth. One hand on her thigh and the other now fisted into her hair.
"Mmmmm Edward" She moans out, then bites me shoulder.
"What do you want baby? What do you want me to do?" I purr in her ear, then bite onto it.
"Undress me and touch me" She says and begins to pull my shirt over my head.
"Gladly" I pull her up to we are both kneeling, face to face. I help her take off my T-shirt and hers quickly follows. I lay her back down, kissing down her throat on along her collar. I stop at her perfect boobs and start kissing. I pull her bra down to expose her nipple and quickly clamp my mouth onto it. I use my left hand to massage her right breast, and run my thumb over her hard nipple. I switch over, repeating the motion until her back is arched. I then carry on my journey down to the waistband of her jeans. Her hands are in my hand and I can't help but laugh to myself.
"Something funny?" She smiles down and me worshiping her body.
"Just last night I was having to close my eyes while you changed." I smile to myself
I run my arm along her waist and up over her ribs and the swell of her breasts. I then trail my hand down her arm and lace my fingers with hers. My mind is now racing and thinking about what we are actually going to do. I want this so bad, but I don't want it to be in reaction to that prick. I trailer kisses back up her stomach and then finish at her lips. We aren't as urgent now, I think we have both realise we shouldn't do this.
"Bella, I want this, my god do I want this. I just think maybe we should wait until you're not with Jacob. I know you, you would feel guilty even if he is a total dickhead." I murmur while playing with our laced fingers.
"I think you're right, Edward. Look I know I was rude and interrupted you before but I've liked you since we met. And you are the one I want to be with. I know you will treat me right and I can be myself around you. I want to be with you, but we shouldn't do this now" She sounds sad over the last fact. I smile to myself and hug her to my chest. We lay there for a while, while our breathing returns to normal. I stroke small circles into her back and occasionally kiss the top of her head. Once we are together and I know we can be together properly I may never leave this room. All I need is right here, in my arms in this moment. Normally when I feel so strongly about it I play my guitar. Ok that is one thing I would change. I would bring my guitar round here, so I could sing to her. But then inspiration strikes me, it's a long shot but I try anyway.
"Bella did you say you had a guitar? When we spoke about me singing for you?"
"I have an acoustic guitar in that cupboard over there" She said pointing to the door next to her bookshelf. I stand up and walk over and open the door. I still have no T-shirt on but I really couldn't care less. I reach into the cupboard and grab the neck of the guitar and pull it out carefully. I strum experimentally seeing if it's in tune, and to my surprise it isn't too bad. I pull up her desk chair and sit myself down, adjusting the tuning to what I want to play. This has gotten Bella curious and she sits up in bed with a confused look.
"You wanted me to play for you right?" She nods "This song was in my head and realised it matched us fairly well. So I thought I would sing it to you, if you like?" She nods again looking like an eager child. I finally finish tuning the guitar and take a last sip of tea which is now luke warm. I take a second to gather my courage then I start to strum. I look down at the guitar but just before I start to sing I look up and look into her beautiful eyes.
Four letter word
But I don't have the guts to say it
Smile 'til it hurts
Let's not make it complicated
We've got a story
And I'm about to change the ending
You're perfect for me
And more than just a friend
So we can just stop pretending now
Gotta let you know somehow
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your storm
I'll make you shiver
I'll keep you warm
Whatever weather
Baby I'm yours
Be your forever, be your fling
Baby I will be your everything
Baby I
Baby I will
Baby I will be your everything
We used to say
That we would always stick together
But who's to say
That we could never last forever
Girl, got a question
Could you see yourself with somebody else?
'Cause I'm on a mission
And I don't wanna share
I want you all to myself right now
I just wanna scream it out
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your storm
I'll make you shiver
I'll keep you warm
Whatever weather
Baby I'm yours
Be your forever, be your fling
Baby I will be your everything
Baby I
Baby I will
Baby I will be your everything
No matter what you do, yeah,
Oh, I'll be there for you
And every time you close your eyes
I will be by your side
'Cause every time you make me sing
Baby I will be your everything
I'll be our shelter
I'll be your storm
But I'll make you shiver
I'll keep you warm
Whatever weather
Baby I'm yours
Be your forever, be your fling
Baby I will be your
Baby I
Baby I will
Baby I will be your everything
Baby
Baby I will
I'll be your storm
Baby I will be your everything
Baby I
Yeah, yeah
Baby I will
Baby I will be your everything
Soon my strumming finally fades out and comes to a stop. I slowly place the guitar to one side, leaning it against her desk and bringing the chair forward. She sits with tears in her eyes and some already falling down her cheeks. I used my thumb to wipe away the tears once again but don't speak. Though wanting to know I meant what I sang I slowly lean in and softly brush my lips against hers. I kiss along to her ear and skim my nose against the shell of her ear. Thinking I had gone this far today I may as well go the whole way. I take a deep breath and whisper "I love you Bella."