Travels through the Alphabet with Mai
Part 3: Carve
Mai pricked the tip of her thumb with a blade and watched as one fat, red drop emerged from below the skin. She allowed it to hover there for a moment before sticking the appendage in her mouth. The metallic taste lingered on her tongue. She liked to test her blades that way, anoint them in blood.
Tall for her age, frail looking, she stood in her bedroom wearing nothing but a thin nightgown. It was late and the streets of Capitol City were dark. Mai had flung the shutters back, letting in soft night air. The moon hung heavy in the sky, almost full and surrounded by shimmering stars, like a monarch with adoring subjects. A lantern burned on her bedside table, illuminating the room with its yellow light. Her wardrobe door was open wide and she pondered where she would carve his name. The girl wished that she could carve it on her heart, slice through skin and tissue and bone to reach the thick muscle before making delicate incisions, beautiful characters that represented his name. She wished that the prince bore her name somewhere too, twin carvings, a link of blood and pain that joined them together across time and distance and change.
But the wardrobe would have to do, somewhere inconspicuous so that her mother did not notice. Mai removed neatly folded tunics and skirts and dresses, putting them down on her bed. She pulled out one of the shelves and turned it upside down, exposing the rougher, unfinished side. Her lips drawn tight with concentration and her pale eyes narrowed, Mai put knife to wood, making the first stroke with some hesitation. The wood was unresisting and the blade bit into it easily, like a kitchen knife sliced tender, juicy meat. Her confidence grew.
Little shavings of wood curled up and Mai blew them aside. When she was done, the girl traced the carving with her index finger, lingering over each character. Somehow, she felt closer to Zuko, having his name in her room with her, where she slept, where she read, where she threw her knives and where she dreamed.
With a sigh, Mai returned the clothes, making certain they were as neat as before. She closed the wardrobe door with a gentle click and headed over to the window. The night was her time to be alone and silent, no mother or father or princess to disturb her thoughts. She craved the fall of dark, felt safe and free beneath its velvet cloak.
She smiled and thought about other places she might leave her mark, little carvings here and there throughout the room, making it hers more than theirs. The plan was a simple one but it made her happy and happiness was hard to come by.