My heart sank at the thought of losing another close friend, no wait, Soda is more than a friend he's my brother, the only one that really understands me, what would life be like without em

"god dammit Soda, you aint leaving over my dead body" darry screamed, everybody stared at us and I knew a fight was about to break out

Soda started to tear up and I could see what pain it was to have to spare the truth "darry, my life is over, the baby's dead, mom and dad are dead, johnny and Dallas are dead" he paused and shook his head in grief "everybody's dying, and if it's gonna be like this I might as well end my life"

my palms started to sweat and I forced myself not to cry

"it don't have to end like this, the world aint over, you have so much more to live for, think of how it will affect pony's life, he could end up a drop out like you, he could end up attempting suicide on himself for gods sake" darry said as he fought to keep the fear out of his voice

Soda looked back at me then sighed "the kid's got a life ahead of em, he could grow up to do big things with his grades, I doubt I'll be of any help or harm"

"don't you even say that, you know he needs you, what would I be of any assistance to him, he needs you soda, first it's you, then it's him, then we could lose the whole gang" I could tell darry was about to cry "living without johnny is hard enough, we can't lose you too"

"next" I heard from behind the counter, I had suddenly noticed that the long line had suddenly shrunk like a Texas twister came through and wiped em all out "hurry up grease" he said in a sharper tone

soda looked behind him at the man then back at me "lets go home" he said

I felt a rush of relief run over me as he said those three words, darry was right soda's the only person I can talk to if I have a problem, it just wouldn't be the same if I had to tell darry, I just only hope he doesn't change his mind

when we got home it was nearly supper time, darry made dinner, meatloaf, fried cabbage, and mashed potatoes, it was a quit meal, nobody spoke much it felt as if we were a bunch of strangers eating together for the first time, it just didn't seem right, after soda and I did the dishes we went straight to bed, I was a rough day for both of us

"pony?" I heard out of no where

I turned around to look at soda lying down practically half asleep "yeah" I said

"i was thinking, you never really said much while darry and I were fighting earlier, I just wanted to ask, what was going through your mind" he said yawning every once in a while

I stiffened, I hadn't expected him to ask me anything about what happened earlier, I was quiet for a minute, staring into his drowsy face wondering if he was actually going to listen "i don't really know, there was just so much that I didn't really pay attention" I said hoping he wouldn't ask for anymore, I had to lie, I didn't want to crush his dreams of fighting in Vietnam

soda made a sleepy moan, "i figured that, you have an active young mind" he said

I looked over at him and saw that he was sleeping, I wondered if he ever had a mind like mine, always in use, always occupied with tons of junk, sometimes I wonder if he ever had an imagination like mine...

I woke up the next morning to find soda still in bed, I figured I should let him rest, when I got into the kitchen I noticed that darry wasn't up either, it wasn't normal for me to be the first one up but after all it had happened after I got back from windrexville, I made breakfast and sat down to watch Hogan's Heroes when I heard a knock at the door, I got up to answer it and saw some random girl standing in the doorway

"can I help you?" I asked confused

she smiled at me with a real sweet grin "hey, can I talk to sodapop Curtis" she said in her country accent

"he's sleeping, can you come over later"

"sure, tell him Jessie Miller stopped by" she said then left

I shrugged in confusion and closed the door about a half hour later soda got up, "hey" I said, he just gave me a tired noise back, "some girl named Jessie Miller came earlier, said she needed to talk to ya"

he looked at me with a worried expression "where is she now?" he asked

"left, I told her to come by later, she should be here again soon"

soda looked out the window then walked towards the bathroom "I'm gonna take a shower, let me know if she comes back" he said

"okay" I said and continued watching TV

a few minutes later I heard another knock at the door, soda rushed in as he put his worn out jeans on, "hi, wanna talk out here" he asked her

"sure"

I tried not to look out the window to see what they were doing yet the temptation got me a few times, after about fifteen minutes of waiting for soda to come back in I looked out one last time and saw them kiss, I fell off the sofa and darry came in

he looked at me "what the heck are you doing kid" he asked

"watching TV" I said trying not to sound suspicious

soda came in and I looked at him, I could tell he didn't want anybody to know what had just happened but I just had to ask, I waited till darry left though "what did she want"

"just wanted to tell me something" he said not looking up

"was it about sandy?" I asked

he motioned for me to come into the bedroom, I sat down in the chair by my desk while he sat on the bed "Jessie and I have been friends for a while, we met in school, she came by DX about two or three weeks ago, she always had feelings for me, but now I'm feeling the same for her" he said

I looked down for a moment, "so yall are going out" I asked

soda nodded "she asked me out to dinner tonight, please don't tell darry about this, he'd kill her if he found out I'm going out with another girl after what sandy did to me, I know he cares about me and all, but I really like Jessie"

"i won't"

"thanks pony, I'll need your help to keep darry occupied tonight so I can get out without him knowing what's going on"

"I'll do my best" nothing more came out of my mouth that morning, all I knew was that soda was happy and if this keeps him from joining the army I'll do whatever it takes to keep darry out of this