Part Three

Yaakuntik

The next afternoon, Kathryn walks into town to go to the communications station and send a message to the Enterprise. Sekaya and the kids are playing down by the lake, and Kathryn insists that I stay and spend time with my family. She has walked into town with me several times, and I know she knows the way, but I still offer to accompany her. No, she says. She'll be fine. She seems a bit standoffish, and I wonder why, but I figure she needs some space, and I let her go.

The afternoon is beautiful. A breeze blows across the lake, creating little white caps. Xaman sits in an inner tube tied to the dock, shouting in delight as the waves bounce him up and down. Eme plays closer to the shore, and I help her build a sand castle while Sekaya watches Xaman. It's almost five o'clock when I look up and realize that the gentle breeze that has kept us from getting too hot all afternoon is blowing dark clouds across the horizon.

"Time to come in, Xaman," my sister calls.

"But Na!"

"No arguing. It looks like it might storm. You know it's not safe to be out on the lake if it storms." Begrudgingly, my nephew swims to shore and then pulls the inner tube up onto the dock and secures it with a rope so it won't blow away. By the time we've made it into the house, the rain is coming down in big, thick drops. I look anxiously at the clock. Kathryn should have made it into town and delivered her message by now. If there was no line at the communications station, and if she walked quickly, she would be nearly back to the cabin by now, I think. If not...

My sister seems to read my mind. "Maybe she saw the bad weather moving in and decided to stay in town."

"Maybe."

"Muluc will be here soon. Maybe she caught a ride with him."

Muluc arrives at the cabin after closing his shop for the day. He has a small ATV that he uses to get around, but the top of it is not covered, and he's sopping wet when he comes in the door. "Looks like a real storm's moving in," he says as he takes off his coat and shoes and leaves them in the entryway.

"Did you see Kathryn in town?" Sekaya asks.

Muluc looks from her to me, and concern crosses his features. "No, did she go in today?"

"She went in to send a subspace communique," I explain. "She left a few hours ago. I think she should have been back by now."

"I can comm Alom down at the communications station, and see if she decided to wait it out there."

"Yeah. That might be a good idea."

Muluc picks up his mobile communicator, the old style, flip-open type. Most families on Trebus have just one. He dials the code for the communications station and his friend Alom answers immediately. "Did you see our friend, Kathryn Janeway, down there today?"

"He'le, Muluc. She was here, but she left a couple hours ago. Just before the rain started, I think. I asked her if she wanted to stay here, wait it out. She said a little rain never hurt anyone, and she'd make it back to your cabin before it got too bad."

"Okay, Alom. Thanks."

"She hasn't made it home?"

"No, but I'm sure we'll see her soon. Thanks for your help. Muluc out."

As if on cue, a clap of thunder rings out through the sky. Eme, who has been playing in the bedroom, begins to wail, and Sekaya quickly goes to comfort her. Xaman emerges from the bedroom behind them, trying awfully hard to be brave. "It's just a storm, Eme," he says, rubbing his sister's back while his mom holds her. "It's okay." But I can tell that he is nearly as scared of the storm as she is.

I nod to Muluc, silently indicating to him that he should join me on the other side of the room, away from the children. Sekaya picks up on my silent cue, and does her best to distract Xaman and Eme while Muluc and I talk in hushed tones. "What do you think?" I ask.

"You know Kathryn better than I do. What do you think she would do if she got caught out in a storm?"

My mind flashes back about six years, to another storm on another planet, another moment of fear and uncertainty. "I think she'd do her best to get back here. If for some reason she thought she couldn't, she'd try and find shelter. She's a pretty resourceful woman." Even though my words are confident, I can't hide the worry in my voice.

"If she's stuck somewhere in the woods, we have to find her," Muluc replies. "Those trees are very vulnerable to lightning strikes. It happens almost every time there's a storm. Not only that, but there are some pretty fierce animals out there. Usually they keep to themselves, but if they're scared and skittish, like they get in the thunder, they might attack anything that moves."

"Damn it!" I exclaim. "I wish she had her communicator, but neither of us have worn them since she got here."

"The storm would probably put up too much interference to use it anyway. We'll have to go out on foot."

A lightning bolt sizzles through the atmosphere, followed by another crack of thunder. I hear the rain pelting down on the cabin roof as my brother-in-law's words sink in, and a cold fear settles in the pit of my stomach. Lightning, predatory animals... Why did I let her go alone?

Muluc speaks softly to Sekaya and I see her glance in my direction, a worried expression on her face, but she nods, assenting to his plan. She helps him find appropriate rain gear for both of us. All these years, Sekaya has kept a raincoat of my father's in the closet. She pulls it out for me and I put it on, feeling strange wearing my father's coat when he's been gone for so many years. Muluc puts on his own rain gear and hands me a flashlight and a phaser. "We should split up," I say. "We'll have a better chance of finding her quickly."

"Agreed."

"Be safe," Sekaya warns us. "If the storm gets much worse, come back, even if you haven't found her." Muluc nods, but my sister knows from my steely expression that I won't be coming back until I find Kathryn, alive and well or... I stop the thought. I will find her and she will be fine.

Sekaya kisses her husband and hugs me. Muluc kisses the children and tells them to be brave and look out for their mother, and that we'll be back soon. "This cabin's weathered many a storm," he assures me as we step out into the howling wind. "Sekaya and the kids will be fine." We agree on separate paths and set off into the darkness. It is not long before the cabin lights have disappeared in the deluge.

The wind wails, and the thunder crashes so loudly I can feel the vibrations resonate through my entire body. I try to imagine I am Kathryn, alone in the woods, headed towards the cabin, when it starts to rain. I might take a route other than the one I knew, I realize, if I thought it might be a shortcut. I plan my search pattern with this in mind, trying to picture the path she might have taken, trying to imagine what she was thinking. "Kathryn!" I scream into the woods. "Kathryn!" Even if she is capable of yelling back, I don't know if I would be able to hear her over the racket of the storm.

I can't stop the fear from rising in my gut. In the cabin, with Muluc and Sekaya standing nearby, I could keep my emotions under control, but now, alone, amidst the roaring of the storm, I cannot stem the terror I feel. It courses through my body like a flood, spurring me on. I have to find her. "Kathryn!"

Lightning crackles through the sky and I smell smoke. It has hit a nearby tree, and I hear a loud crack as the tree splits in half and hits the ground. The rain pours down in heavy drops. The parts of my pants not covered by the coat and boots are soaked through, and the rain is beginning to penetrate even my heavy rain gear. I push the hood back so I can hear better. "Kathryn!" My flashlight can barely penetrate the darkness and the heavy rain, and I can hardly see more than two meters in front of me. My eyes sting, and I realize that it is not only the rain, but rising tears that blur my vision. I stumble, tripping over a fallen tree branch, and I have to haul myself back to my feet again. That's when I think I see something - a large, leafy tree branch propped up against a big, old tree trunk at an unnatural angle. It doesn't look like it could have fallen there naturally, but like it was put there on purpose. I shine my light directly at the branch, and I catch a glimpse of white skin. "Kathryn!" I am running, then, the few steps that it takes for me to reach the stump. I pull away the large branch, and there is Kathryn, holding her knees to her chest, shivering. I kneel down in front of her. "Kathryn, are you all right?"

"Chakotay?"

"Yes. Yes, it's me. Are you okay?"

"I tripped. I think I twisted my ankle." Her teeth are chattering. "I was trying to get back before the s-s-storm. I thought I could t-t-take a shortcut."

"You're in shock." Without giving it a second thought, I am taking off my father's raincoat and wrapping it around her. I hoist her onto her feet and drape her arm over my shoulder, but we only walk a few steps before I realize that the wind and her twisted ankle are going to make walking like this too difficult. I scoop her up into my arms and cradle her against me; the fact that she doesn't protest only proves to me that she's really in bad shape. I am practically running back to the cabin, moving as fast as I can through the storm with Kathryn in my arms. The wind is picking up again. The storm is getting worse, and I hope Muluc followed his wife's advice and returned to the cabin.

When I reach the front door, I bang on it with my foot. "Let me in!"

Muluc opens the door, his hair and pants wet. "Thank the spirits," he breathes. "I just walked in a few minutes ago. We were praying that you found her."

"She's hurt. Maybe hypothermic."

"Chakotay." Kathryn's voice is slurred. "Chakotay, where am I?"

"It's okay, Kathryn. You're safe. We're home now, and you're safe."

"I'm c-c-cold."

Sekaya is hot on Muluc's heels. "Shh," she tells me. "I don't want to wake the children. Put Kathryn in her room."

I bring her into the bedroom and unwrap the heavy raincoat from around her shoulders. Her lips are blue, and her teeth are chattering, but Sekaya is way ahead of me. "Chakotay, get out of those wet clothes. I'll take care of Kathryn."

"But..." I start to argue, and my sister cuts me off.

"You won't be any use to her or to me if you catch your death. Go change."

"My clothes are down in the tent."

"No, they're not. I brought some of them up here. They're in our room. Now hurry up, and don't wake the children."

My sister's tone makes it impossible to argue, and I follow her instructions, but everything is a blur. I strip off my soaking wet clothes and pull on the first thing of mine that I see - a pair of grey trousers and a black shirt that I yank over my head. I slip soft moccasins onto my feet and throw my sopping clothes over the back of a chair, trying to be mindful of my sister's instructions to be quiet when there's only one thing on my mind - Kathryn.

By the time I rush back into Kathryn's room, my sister has managed to get her out of her wet clothes and has helped her change into a heather grey sweat suit. Whether it belongs to Kathryn or my sister, I don't know. Sekaya is tucking Kathryn under the covers, but Janeway is fighting my sister and seems confused. "No, wait!" she protests. "I have to find Chakotay."

"I'm right here, Kathryn."

"No," she argues, "you're not Chakotay. You're Teero. Where's Chakotay?"

Her words send a sharp pain through my soul, and I take my sister's place, sitting down on the edge of the bed and taking Kathryn's shoulders in my hands. Sekaya quietly leaves the room. "Kathryn, look at me. Look at me." Even through the soft material of the sweat suit, her skin is cold to my touch, and I know hypothermia can cause mild confusion. I shake her gently, and it seems to bring her back to reality.

"Chakotay?"

"Yes, I'm right here. We need to get you warm, Kathryn, okay?"

"Okay."

I help her get under the blankets, mindful of her injured ankle, and run my hands down the length of her arms. "How's that?"

"B-b-better."

"Still cold?" I ask. Kathryn nods, and I do the only thing I can think of. I climb up onto the bed next to her, outside of the covers, and surround her body with mine. I let my own warmth seep through the layers of blankets and clothing that separate us, and I gently rub my hands up and down her arms and the length of her back. After a few minutes, she sighs contentedly, and her eyes begin to close with fatigue.

My sister knocks gently on the still open door. "Can I come in?"

I extricate myself slowly from Kathryn's body and sit on the bed beside her. "Sure."

"I made some broth. See if you can get her to drink this. It will help her warm up."

"Thanks, iits'in." I smile gratefully at my sister, then try to rouse Kathryn. "Hey," I say gently, rubbing her arms, "you awake?" She makes a noncommittal sound that I choose to interpret as an affirmative. "Come on, Kathryn. Sit up and have some soup." I manage to get her to sit, and as I prop her back up against some pillows, she gasps. "What's wrong?"

"My ankle. Hurts."

I look to my sister. With the storm raging outside, there's no way to get a doctor out here tonight. "We have an analgesic in the med kit," Sekaya says. "It will dull the pain until we can get you to a medic tomorrow."

Kathryn nods, and I see that she is beginning to come back to herself. I take the steaming bowl of broth from my sister, and Sekaya leaves us alone again. I lift a spoonful of the hot liquid to Kathryn's lips. She swallows it, then reaches for the bowl. "I can feed myself, thank you, Commander."

Then I laugh out loud. It is so good to hear her command tone; I never thought I would be so happy to hear her address me by my rank, but at this moment, it's the best thing she could have said.

"What? What are you laughing at?"

"Nothing." I exhale a long, slow sigh of relief. "I'm just happy you're okay. I was a little worried for a few minutes there."

"I'm fine, Chakotay." I reach out to brush her hair out of her face, and I see that she is surprised by my gesture of tenderness. She spoons up some more of the broth, but I can see her eyelids drooping from exhaustion.

"Here, let me take that," I say, reaching for the broth. She's managed about half of it, and when I take the bowl from her, her skin is no longer icy. Her lips have returned to their normal color, and some pink is returning to her cheeks. "You need to rest."

She nods and settles back against the pillows. I stand to bring the bowl back into the kitchen, but her voice stops me. "Don't go yet."

"I'll be right back. I'm just going to put this in the kitchen and talk to Sekaya for a minute, okay?" She nods, weakly. I bring the bowl back into the kitchen where Sekaya and Muluc are sitting at the table, clasping each other's hands. "She's going to be fine," I assure them. "A mild case of hypothermia, I think. Maybe a sprained ankle. It's nothing serious."

Sekaya stands and goes to the cabinet where she keeps the med kit. "It's a good thing you found her when you did. Did she tell you what happened?"

"She wasn't very coherent when I found her. I think she tried to take a shortcut after it started raining, and tripped and twisted her ankle."

"Here's a hypospray with an analgesic. This should dull the pain for about twelve hours." Sekaya pauses and listens outside. It sounds like the storm is finally beginning to die down. "We'll be able to get a medic out here tomorrow without any trouble." She hands me the hypo and looks back at her husband. "We're going to bed. You can take some blankets and a sleeping bag out of the closet and sleep on the floor if you'd like, Chakotay. I'm sorry we don't have another bed."

"Don't worry about it. I'll be fine." I pause. "Thank you. Thank you both for everything tonight."

"That's what family is for," Muluc says as he pats me on the shoulder and heads for the bedroom. My sister hugs me and wishes me goodnight. I turn off the lights in the kitchen and return to Kathryn's room. My own heart rate is finally returning to normal, and the adrenaline that has been coursing through me since I left the cabin in the storm is beginning to dissipate. At first, I think she has fallen asleep, and I stand in the doorway, watching the slow rise and fall of the blankets that indicates her steady breathing.

But she seems to sense my presence, because she turns towards the door. "I thought you'd gone."

"I told you I'd come back." I extend the hypospray to her. "An analgesic for your ankle." She tilts her head to expose her neck, and I press the hypo against her skin and release its contents with a hiss.

"Thank you." She looks at me, only her head protruding from the pile of blankets on the bed. "That's the second time you've had to come and find me in the middle of a storm."

I'm surprised she's coherent enough to make the connection and even more surprised her willingness to bring it up. "I don't think I've ever told you this," I reply, "but my name is derived from an ancient god of storms." I grin down at her.

"Well, that explains it, then," she says, as if it really does.

"You need to get some rest. Let me tuck you in."

Her eyes are beginning to close already, and I can't help but find her slightly incoherent sleepiness endearing. She tries to protest. "I'm... fine.. Cha.. kotay."

"Mmhmm." I don't argue with her. I simply help her get comfortable and arrange the pillows around her small frame, then pull the blankets up around her chin. "Goodnight, Kathryn," I whisper. "Sleep well." I lean over and place a kiss on her forehead, then turn out the lights and exit the room.

I don't think I can sleep, so I make myself some tea and sit at the kitchen table, listening as the wind becomes progressively softer, and the rain lightens, and finally stops completely. I keep replaying the evening in my mind - the fear I felt when I thought I might lose her, the relief at knowing she was going to be okay. Something Muluc said to me the other night keeps coming back to me - when he said that with Sekaya, he always feels something, even if it is frustration or anger - that with her, he has no choice. My sister's words echo in my head, too. "Part of you is on Trebus, but part of you has never been here. Even when we were children, your heart was in the stars. That's where you belong. Maybe Kathryn is part of that." In the early hours of the morning, I decide to be honest, truly honest with myself. Maybe I will find the courage to be honest with Kathryn, too. Maybe I will find the strength I need to share my heart and my soul again, truly, deeply and fully.

The storm has passed, and the sun is about to rise in a blaze of red and gold. Silently, I leave the cabin and go down to the water's edge. Like I did that first night I was here, I strip down to nothing. The storm has churned up the water and left it cold, but in the early morning calm, the lake is tranquil. I look down and see my own reflection - the tattoo that has come to mean so much to me, my dark eyes that mirror my sister's and my niece and nephew's, the touch of grey in my hair. Then I plunge my whole body into the water, and when I come up for air, for the first time in a long time, I feel whole.

I dress and go back into the house. The dawn is close at hand, but the sun is still only a glimmer of golden fire on the horizon. Noiselessly,, I make my way into the doorway and peer into Kathryn's room. The door is open a crack, and I slide into the room without making a sound. She is sleeping peacefully, her breathing normal. Her auburn hair is splayed across the pillow and her expression is neutral. I stand there watching her for a long time and feel a wave of love wash over me. I have no choice; she always makes me feel something. I have found what I lost.

Morning comes, and my family gradually awakens. The children are anxious to see Kathryn and know she's all right. Xaman brings her coffee in bed, which delights her, and Eme entertains her by putting on a show with her dolls. Muluc summons a medic, and he shows up promptly to heal Kathryn's ankle and double check that there is no other damage to her system. She's fine, and by lunch time, she's walking around the cabin with no problem. We haven't had a moment alone because my entire family is fussing over her, and although I feel like I discovered something last night, I don't know how to tell her, or if she will even welcome hearing it.

It is evening, and I am sitting on the dock, alone, when I feel her presence behind me. I turn my head to see her standing at the end of the dock, wearing a pale yellow sundress that buttons all the way up the front. Her hair tumbles loosely over her shoulders, and her feet are bare. "Join me," I offer, patting the wooden slats beside me. She does.

"Sekaya said to tell you they'd be spending the night in town. I guess we have the place to ourselves."

I chuckle. "Not so subtle, are they?"

"They just want you to be happy, Chakotay."

I look into her bright blue eyes, and I smile, feeling a rush of joy surge through me. She smiles back, but the question remains in her eyes. I need to tell her, but I don't know where to begin. Haahil. Truth. She has always deserved the truth, this incredible woman beside me - this woman with whom I have shared so much, and yet so little, of my life. "When we realized you were missing last night, I was scared." She watches me, allowing me to continue, and doesn't say anything. "I was terrified, actually. I was running through the woods, screaming your name. I couldn't even let myself think about what I would do if we didn't find you." I pause, take a deep breath. "I don't want to live without you, Kathryn." She opens her mouth to speak, but I hold up a hand to stop her. "Let me finish. When I came here, I wasn't sure who I was or where I belonged. I lost... so much in the Delta Quadrant. We all did. We gained something we never could have imagined, but we lost something in the process, too - you and I especially. When I invited you to join me here, I wasn't sure I knew who you were anymore. I thought that anything more than friendship between us was impossible; I convinced myself of that a long time ago."

"So did I," she says softly. "But anything is possible... isn't it?"

"I hope so," I answer. She gives me a soft smile and holds up her left hand. I interlace my fingers with hers. "I was afraid, before you came, that I'd discover that our friendship was nothing more than convenience - two people who had no one else to turn to, seventy thousand light years from home. But seeing you here, being with you here, I've been reminded of so many things I had forgotten, or ignored over the years. You're beautiful, Kathryn. So beautiful. You make me laugh, and I love that I can make you laugh. I had forgotten how much fun we have together. I had started to believe that I was too damaged by the things that had happened to me, that I'd been betrayed too many times, made too many mistakes. I thought that we had been through too much together, we'd spent too much time putting our own feelings last, that we wouldn't be able to change our relationship. But last night I realized that I can't deny how I feel for you. I can't, and I don't want to. I want you in my life, as deeply, as truly and as often as possible."

She squeezes my hand. "I feel the same way. I thought I'd be glad to spend some time away from everyone after seven years in close quarters. I thought I needed space, but it didn't take me long to realize how much I missed everyone, especially you. It's one of the reasons I came here." It's her turn to take a deep breath. "I came with my mind open to options that had never seemed possible before. Despite what I said last night, I had hoped that you might be open to those possibilities, too. I know you were at one time. I didn't lie to you - I do cherish our friendship, and it is enough for me - but I would be lying if I said that I hadn't hoped we might be able to explore something more."

I reach up with my free hand to cup her face. Her skin is so soft, and her eyes widen but do not leave mine. My senses are heightened, and I hear the warble of birds in the trees and the lapping of water against the shore. I breathe in the sweet smelling air and imprint on my memory the way Kathryn's skin glows in the fading sunlight, the way her eyes are big with unshed tears. I feel as though the time passes in slow motion as I move my face closer to hers, holding eye contact until the closeness makes it impossible. Then I can smell her scent - a hint of lavender and roses, coffee, and Kathryn - and our lips meet. Her lips are soft and supple as they move against mine, and my whole body is electrified by the kiss. My tongue darts out to taste her, and she parts her lips. Then I feel her tongue seeking entrance to my mouth, dancing with mine, and I am tasting her, smelling her, reveling in her.

When we can no longer breathe, I break the kiss. I rest my forehead against hers, one hand still cupping her cheek, my other hand still entwined with hers. We are both breathing hard. My hand slides from her cheek down her arm and comes to rest on the wood of the dock. She pulls back slightly and looks into my eyes, and we breathe at the same time, "I love you." Then, together, we burst out laughing - not with humor, but with joy. Pure, unadulterated joy. Kiimak ool.

And then, I am pushing her back onto the dock, covering her body with mine. I feel the soft flesh of her breasts against my chest, the heat between her legs pressing into my thigh. My hands are tangled in her hair and my tongue is exploring her mouth, slowly, savoring every moment, every taste. I want to discover every inch of her body, to sample every bit of soft, white skin. My lips trail over her cheeks, and I plant butterfly kisses on her eyes. I find the indent just below her left ear and nip at it gently. She gasps, and her body arcs up into mine, accenting the feel of my own hardness swelling between us. Her hands stroke down my back and over my buttocks, pulling me further into her, and it is my turn to gasp. My hand finds her breast, and I can feel her hard nipple through the material of her cotton dress. I roll it between my fingers and she tosses her head back in ecstasy. "Oh!" I don't know if the exclamation is hers or mine, or both - a sensation shared between us, only possible because we are both present in this moment.

Her hand is caressing me through my pants, and now I know the moan that escapes is mine, but I reach down and still her ministrations. "Kathryn," I pant, "hang on." I meet her eyes, and she looks disappointed, but I kiss the tip of her nose and reassure her, "I was just going to suggest that we move to the bedroom."

She wraps her arms around my neck and pulls my head down to hers for a long kiss, after which she releases me. "Good idea."

I get to my feet quickly and extend my hand to help her up. Then, to her shock, I lift her in my arms and carry her into the house, peppering kisses over her cheeks and lips as we walk. I kick the cabin door open, and close it again behind us with my foot. Her lack of subtlety notwithstanding, I'm suddenly extremely grateful to my sister for her foresight in having left us alone tonight.

I lay Kathryn down on the bed - the bed that I built for her - and set myself to opening the buttons that fasten the front of her dress. One button at a time, I uncover her skin and her lacy periwinkle blue bra and panties. I kiss my way down her body, savoring every moment. My fingers feather over the lacy material of her bra, and I feel the weight of her breasts in my hands as my mouth travels lower.

Hands, mouths, fingers, skin, hips - gradually, we discover each other, body and soul. We find pleasure in each other's pleasure. My entire body shudders as my fingers find her wet heat, and I see the joy she takes in my groan of bliss when she kneels before me and takes me into her mouth. It is a journey of cries and moans, heat and wetness, hard muscles and soft skin. Finally, I am above her, poised at her entrance. I feel the heat radiating from her, her slick moisture coating my hard length as I slowly lower myself, sinking deeper and deeper into her eyes, into her body, into her soul. "Kathryn." I gasp her name as we join completely for the first time.

"Chakotay."

This is the most perfect sensation I have ever felt, and I can see from the euphoria on her face that her experience is as powerful as mine. I am overwhelmed with emotion as I move within her. Our eyes are locked together, mirroring our bodies and our souls. We have become part of each other, and this final act is a celebration of a connection that runs far deeper than our physical bodies.

Our tempo increases, and her moans of pleasure become louder. I let myself feel everything; I hold nothing back, and her cries escalate as our mutual ecstasy mounts. Her eyes never leave mine as she calls out and her entire being tenses. Then I am emptying myself into her body - emptying myself and filling myself at the same time, clutching her shoulders, shouting her name.

After, we whisper words of love and devotion. We kiss and touch, comforting, reassuring, tender. I hold her, relishing the feel of her warm, soft body against mine. I never, ever want to let her go. Yaakun. Love. Yaakuntik. Beloved. I whisper these words to her, whisper their meaning. She whispers back, words of adoration, faithfulness. Laylie. Always.

Together, we find sleep. We let the darkness claim us for a few hours, then wake and make love again. Afterwards, we realize we are hungry. We went to bed the first time before the sunset, and now it is two o'clock in the morning. We get up. I pull on some loose pajama pants, and Kathryn wears one of my long, button-down shirts. It barely covers her ass, and I watch her walk around the kitchen without disguising my appreciation of her assets. She slaps my cheek lightly, teasing, and accuses me of being a dirty old man. Then I grab her and tickle her until she is screaming for mercy, and I silence her with big, wet, open-mouthed kisses. I am tempted to take her again, right then, across the kitchen table, but I'm not sure I have the stamina for that, and I doubt my sister would appreciate it. So I let her go and fix us some toast and tea.

We sit at the kitchen table talking until the wee hours of the morning. We talk about Voyager - about Quarra and Teero and New Earth. She talks about what she has felt and been through since our return home, trying to find her place in a world she barely remembers and doesn't feel part of anymore. I tell her everything I've been contemplating since I came to Trebus - my experiences during the war, my thoughts about losing my family, losing myself. We share our deepest fears, our most profound thoughts. We bare our souls to each other, and I have never felt so free. Around the time the sun comes up, we crawl back into bed, curling around one another. The bed wasn't really built for two people, but I have never slept so comfortably.

We are woken suddenly by a small body that jumps on top of us in the bed. "Time to wake up, Oeyum! Time to wake up!"

It takes me several moments to realize that I am still in bed with Kathryn, and it is Xaman who has jumped on top of us. "Xaman!" I exclaim, glad that we kept some clothes on when we came back to bed. "What time is it?"

"It's the afternoon! Come on, it's time to get up." Xaman climbs off the bed, over Kathryn, and she rolls over and sees him, suddenly self conscious, pulling the blankets up around her chin.

"Xaman!" Sekaya admonishes from the doorway. "You know you should knock before you enter your uncle's room." I can tell that my sister is trying desperately to keep a straight face.

Xaman puts his hands on his hips and gives his mother a confused look. "This is Kathryn's room."

"Either way. You shouldn't run in without permission."

The boy turns back to look at us, chagrined. "Sorry, Oeyum."

Kathryn is sitting up in bed beside me, and I'm impressed that she's dealing with this situation so well. She's usually a very private person. "It's all right, Xaman," she says. "You're right; it's time for us to get up."

Xaman looks at us for a moment, then back at his mother. I can tell he's about to say something he knows he shouldn't, but he can't help himself. "Kathryn," he asks, "are you going to be our real tilla now?"

Kathryn looks at me, a blush rising in her cheeks. "What do you think, Chakotay?"

I pull her back into my chest, wrapping both arms around her from behind as I look over her shoulder at my nephew. "I think it's a great idea. Do you agree, Xaman?"

My nephew thinks it's the best idea he's ever heard, and, judging by the look on her face, so does my sister.