Notes: Almost a week late. Ah well. I know I'm evil for making you wait but I've had a couple of weird/tough weeks. Will try and see about getting another chapter out shortly. And a slight cameo appearance by Kitra and Kashi. Sister and brother twins of mine. They pop up occasionally in my KH stories.
In Life and Death
Chapter 22: Hearts in Pieces
A knock sounded at the front door. Riku looked up from the crossword he'd been working on. He stared at the door for a minute until there was a second knock. It was barely past noon on a Friday in late March. He wasn't expecting anyone at that moment. He hardly had any visitors anymore.
A third knock followed. "Hey Riku? You in there? It's Kairi."
Riku smiled and jumped up when he heard her voice. He dropped the crossword book on the table beside the door as he pulled it open. "Hey."
She breathed out a large sigh of relief as she adjusted the strap of the bag she was holding. "Oh I was afraid you weren't home."
Riku smiled brightly and shook his head. "Nah. I'm home. Just hanging out until I have to leave." He grabbed her bag and pulled her into a hug.
"Sorry I'm early."
"Are you?"
She pouted as he released her. "You didn't forget, did you?"
"Uh…" He scratched at the back of his head. "Maybe…" He hadn't exactly forgotten that she called three days ago to say she had a free weekend and wanted to visit. He had just forgotten it was this weekend.
"Riku!"
He smiled sheepishly. "Oh sue me. You're welcome anytime. Even if I forget."
She rolled her eyes and shook her head as she stepped farther into the apartment. "Anyways… school let out early. Something about the water main."
"It's no problem. Really." He shut the door behind her and then turned around. "I feel like I haven't seen you in forever. I'm just glad you could come. It's been like two months."
A sigh was emitted as she looked down at the ground. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry."
"I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I understand."
She smiled. "Besides, you could always come to the island for a visit."
He shook his head slowly.
"Didn't think so."
He set her bag down on the couch and turned for the kitchen.
"So… not to change the subject or anything… but I was going to make something for lunch soon. Hungry?"
Her smile broadened as she followed him. "I could be."
"Come on."
An hour later found them standing at the kitchen sink. Riku was washing the dished they used and Kairi was drying and putting them away.
"Riku…" She said softly, breaking the silence that had dropped when they started. "How are you?" The words came out slowly, as if she dreaded the answer.
"I'm great." He smiled and flicked a handful of bubbles at her.
She frowned as she wiped the bubbles away with her dishtowel. "I'm being serious Riku. How are you really?"
"I'm fine."
"Damnit Riku…"
"I promise. I'm fine." He insisted, turning away from the sink and moving towards the table.
"Riku!" She dropped the dishtowel in the sink and followed. "Come on! You're wallowing."
"I am not." He snapped suddenly as he turned around to glare at her.
"Yes you are! You aren't doing anything."
"I'm doing plenty. I just finished cooking you lunch… we did the dishes… hey! I even pick up after myself and do my laundry."
Her eyes narrowed. "That's not what I meant."
He sighed and shook his head. "I'm working."
"You're avoiding."
Nearly four months had passed since Sora left him. Riku hadn't seen or heard from him in that long. Kairi and Rain both expected him to fall apart, like he had when he first found out about the babies and again when they died and Sora was in a coma. And while he would admit the first couple of weeks weren't easy, he was determined not to let himself fall off the edge again.
With a sigh, he changed the subject. "How is he? Has he… asked about me?"
Kairi didn't answer.
"You can tell me the truth. I won't fall off the world."
Kairi sighed softly. "Truthfully… I don't know what's going on with him. I haven't talked to him in probably two months."
Riku crossed his arms after he pulled a chair out and sat down at the kitchen table. "But you said he started back at school."
She nodded, taking a seat across from him. "He's still going. But he doesn't hang out with me and the others anymore. He's hanging out with… Kitra and her brother."
"Who?"
"Kitra and Kashi." She repeated, leaning on the table. "Do you remember them? They moved to the island about a month before you graduated, I think. Tall, thin, black hair, green eyes… both are sort of anti-social…"
He nodded slowly. "Yeah, I think I remember them. But why is h handing out with them?"
"Honestly… I… well… I mean… we knew them before. Not well but we knew them enough to say a hello in passing. And then one day, Sora… he just sits with them at lunch. And the he's hanging out with them after school. And he never calls me back. I think it has more to do with the fact that they're twins than anything else."
Riku nodded slowly again as he leaned back in his chair. "In a Sora way… it makes sense. He's dealing."
"By pushing you and me and everyone else away?"
He shrugged. "It's his way."
"It's unhealthy."
"He just needs more time."
"Time?" She threw up her arms in frustration. "How can you be so calm about this?"
"Because I know him." Riku said softly. "Because I have faith in him. Because I love him." He shrugged. "Pick a reason."
"Riku…"
"Look…" He pushed his chair away from the table and stood up. "I know how it sounds. I do. Maybe I'm crazy. But I'm willing to wait. For as long as he needs. Weeks, months, years… however long it takes. I know he'll come back to me."
Kairi leaned farther on the table and looked up at him. "And what if he finds someone else instead while you're waiting for him to come back?"
Riku shrugged. "If he can find someone else that will make him happy… then I'll be alright. Because as much as I love him… I want him to be happy."
"Riku…"
"Oh stop." He waved her off, smiling. "I'm alright. Really."
She sighed and leaned back. "But all you're doing is working. You don't need two jobs."
"Three. I got a weekend security job."
"Shit, Riku." She rose swiftly and reached over to grab his arm. "When do you have time to sit and relax?"
"I don't. That's the point. Keeping myself busy."
Her grip increased. "What about going back to school?
He shook his head. "I told you I can't."
"You only tried for a week."
"Yeah. While I was sitting in class I couldn't think of anything but Sora."
"Riku…"
He pulled away from her grip and turned his back to her. When he spoke, his voice was soft. "When I'm working, I have a role to play. I have tasks to do and rules to follow. I have to think about what I'm doing. I don't have time to grieve over my babies who died and my fiancé who left me."
"Oh…." She bit her lip and lowered her gaze, feeling guilty. "And here I am, bringing it up again."
Riku waved the comment off and smiled as he turned back to face her. "No worries. I have to get going anyways."
She rolled her eyes. "Figures. I just got here and you have to leave. I never get to see you anymore."
He shrugged. "You graduate in a couple months. Why don't you move in?"
"Move in?"
He nodded. "I don't see Sora coming back anytime soon. And he's not using his room. You might as well have it. You originally talked about moving in."
"Yeah but…"
He shrugged again and headed out into the living room. "It was just an idea."
"Yeah…" Kairi nodded after a moment. "Okay. Maybe we can make Sora jealous." She followed after him.
He laughed. "I'm not sleeping with you."
Her mouth dropped open and she slapped his arm. "I will forget you said that."
He smiled. "In the meantime, maybe I can see about trading a shift and…"
"Oh that would be great!" She jumped up and threw her arms around him.
He pried her off. "Like I said, maybe. But I have to go now."
"Fine, fine."
With a smile, Riku grabbed his keys and slipped out the door.
Kairi pouted slightly and fell on the couch. She pulled out her phone and dialed Sora's number. She wasn't surprised when she got the answering machine.
"You've reached Sora. He's not here right now. Leave a message and he'll get back to you."
Kairi sighed as she heard the voice and waited for the beep. "Hey Sora. This is Kairi again. Just calling again to let you know I'm at Riku's for the weekend. Riku's working three jobs now so he doesn't have time to think about the asshole who abandoned him. Though maybe Riku is better off without that guy. Because now Riku can find someone else." She purposely used his name too many times. "Now we can all go on with our lives and forget about everything. That's what you want, isn't it? You ran away from Riku and from me. And I just think… this is worse than when you didn't tell him. I think you're a coward! Come on Sora! You've always been fearless! No matter what was thrown at you, you came out on top. Sora, the mighty hero." She was crying then. "You suck, Sora. You suck." She hung up the phone.
"Shit…" She dialed the number again and listened to his message again. "Okay. I'm sorry. I was too harsh. This is just your way to deal, right? That's what Riku said. One day, you'll wake up and be okay and come running back to us. Only thing is… will it be too late?" She sighed and shook her head slowly. "I got to go Sora. Riku's working at the theater in the mall tonight. I'm going to go be a friend and annoy him." She paused and bit her lip. "I love you Sora." Hesitation laced her voice as she said it and slipped the phone closed.
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
"I love you Sora."
Tears threatened the gentle eyes as the message was deleted.
"Sora? Sweetie, who was that?"
The brunette wiped at his eyes and forced a smile as he turned to his mom. "No one. Just checking messages."
"Kairi again?"
Sora didn't answer.
"I wish you would talk to her. Him I can vaguely understand. But not Kairi. Sora… you need your friends."
Sora pushed past his mom roughly, moving into the kitchen. "I have friends."
"Your real friends." Rain turned to watch him. "I'm sure these new friends of yours are wonderful kids. But you can't replace Kairi or R… him."
Sora shrugged slightly and dropped his gaze, still not answering. He knew there was nothing he could say to his mom. Of course he knew he should talk to Kairi. And to Riku. But every time he picked up his phone, something inside him stopped him because he could hit a number. He opened the refrigerator and grabbed a can of soda.
Rain studied him a moment, her gaze falling on his hand as he popped the can open. "Don't you go thinking I haven't noticed you're still wearing that ring. That you've never taken it off."
Sora looked down at his hand and clenched it. "I take it off all the time."
She shook her head. "I've seen you come out of the shower, dressed in a robe and that ring."
"I take it off." He insisted.
"Then do it. Right now. Take the damn thing off."
Sora fingered the ring, spinning it around in circles. But he didn't move it.
"Just as I thought."
"I have to go." Sora set the discarded soda can on the counter, grabbed his keys, and slammed the front door shut behind him.
"Of course you do." Rain sighed deeply as she slunk into one of the chairs. "You're just deflecting Sora. Pushing people away because it's too painful isn't going to help anyone. You have to feel the pain… to face it… so you can move past it." She leaned forward and rubbed at her forehead. Tears slipped down her face. She couldn't make her son understand he was only hurting himself more. And she didn't know what to do anymore. "I can't help him…"
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
Sora shifted his weight back and forth as he knocked on the door. He felt vaguely nervous and couldn't exactly explain why. The messages Kairi left did upset him, but that wasn't anything new. Her messages always upset him. His eyes were on his feet as the door opened.
"Sora! Dear, come on in."
He smiled at her as he stepped inside. "Thanks Kitra."
Her short black hair was spiked and her green eyes were hidden behind her thin, purple rimmed glasses. "How does this day find you?"
"Not doing so good." He muttered. The extent of what he told them was more than he told everyone else because he told everyone else nothing. He told the twins that he had been living with and engaged to Riku. Both vaguely remembered him. He told them they had a fight, though not what about, and he left. "Where's Kashi?" He asked, following her into the living room and looking around. "I thought maybe, if you guys don't have any plans, we could catch a ferry to the main land and go to the mall. Maybe see a movie?"
"Oh yes!" The other half of the pair came out of his room and smiled at the brunette. He looked exactly like his sister, except for the longer hair and lack of boobs. Before his sister grew the latter, they used to switch places and play pranks on people. "Dude! Shopping after. My wardrobe is so totally calling for facelift."
Kitra rolled her eyes. "It bears no surprise that you would want to go shopping."
He ignored her and looked to Sora. "I've got no plans. We were supposed to be in school for a few more hours."
"We all were." Kitra snapped, clearly unhappy with being overlooked.
He ignored her again as he grabbed his keys and wallet from the living room table. "Why don't you and me go and we'll leave the sourpuss behind." He grabbed Sora's hand and headed for the door.
"Hey!" Kitra called after them as she grabbed her purse and ran out the door.
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
Three tickets for the new vampire movie, Nightblood, were dropped on the table as he pulled out one of the chairs, spun it around, and sat backwards on it. They were sitting at a table, half hidden behind a large potted plant and a trashcan, in the food court. The entrance to the movie theater wasn't too far away. "There you go."
Sora eyed the tickets. "Did he… see you?"
Kashi smiled and shook his head. "I don't think so. He was busy with a customer and that redheaded girl… Kairi, right? She was hanging out at the counter."
"Kairi…" Kitra mused as she took a sip of her drink. "Now she's a real looker."
Kashi nodded as he leaned forward and rested his arms on the back of the chair. "Yeah, she is." He agreed. "So is he."
Sora's eyes were still on the table.
"Seriously." Kashi turned slightly to watch Sora's reaction. He never quite believed Sora's story. He had a feeling there was something more. "You were shacking up with that guy and you left?"
Sora shifted in his chair but didn't look up or say anything.
"Must have been some fight to make you give that up."
"Kashi!" Kitra kicked at her brother under the table.
He turned to glare at her before turned back to Sora. "Fine, fine. Now that you've spied on him, will we be sneaking in to see the movie or simply skipping it?"
Sora fingered the tickets. "I want to see it." He said softly.
"Then now is the time for us to go." Kitra pointed towards the door. "A big crowd is forming that we can meld with." She jumped up, grabbed the tickets, and motioned for them to come. "Follow."
Kashi waited a moment longer before getting up and Sora followed. "I'm sorry." He said softly so no one else around would hear. "I shouldn't have said anything."
Sora shrugged as he shuffled along. "It's alright. Don't worry about it." He sighed softly and his voice dropped more. "It was my fault. I'm the one who left because I couldn't deal. And I told him to stay away."
"Deal with what?"
"You two. Here, now. We need to go in now!" Kitra grabbed both their hands and pulled them along.
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
"So you saw him tonight, right?"
Riku nodded as he hit the unlock button and opened the door to the van he no longer needed. "That Kashi guy isn't as sneaky as he thinks. He kept staring."
Kairi laughed as she opened the passenger door and slipped inside. "They were sitting in the food court forever."
"It's kind of cute." With a smile, he turned the key and started backing out. "I don't mind being stalked."
"If they do it again, I say flirt with the guy."
He pulled out of the parking lot and looked over at her. "Who? Kashi?
Kairi nodded. "Might just make Sora jealous."
"Kairi that's evil."
Her smile deepened. "Maybe a little bit. I could get his number and you could call and ask him out."
"Kairi!"
The rest of the drive home was silent. It wasn't until the van had been parked and locked and they were standing in the hallway when she spoke. "Can I ask you something?" She asked slowly, not looking at him.
Riku pulled the keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door. "Sure. Shoot."
"What really happened?" She asked as she followed him in. "I got that there was a fight. I made assumptions but… neither of you really told me anything."
Riku was silent for a long while as he closed and locked the door behind her and sat down on the couch. "Okay." He said finally, lying down and propping his feet up on the arm. "Sora wanted… to get physical. But for the wrong reason. I said no. He accused me of sleeping with Ally and Connie. Then he wrote me a letter and left. He said he couldn't be with me… because he loved me too much and he couldn't chance it again… getting pregnant."
Kairi nodded slowly as she took a seat on one of the chairs. "That's pretty much what I thought but it's nice to hear it confirmed. Thanks for being honest."
He shrugged. "I have nothing to lose now."
"Speaking of Ally and Connie… whatever happened to them?"
He folded his arms behind his neck, getting more comfortable. His gaze lifted to the ceiling. "Ally was only here to help with Sora. She wasn't needed anymore once he woke up and wasn't freaking out anymore. I assume she's gone back to her old job."
"And Connie?"
He let out a sigh. Guilt tugged at him as he thought about the blonde. He had promised to keep her updated and call her when he last talked to her. "The last time I talked to her… was when… I called to cancel our so-call date. I never called her back after that."
She was silent for a minute, thinking about the few times she had met the blonde receptionist. "Why were you talking to her anyways?"
Riku smiled. "She was my spy on Veera. I never told her the real story of course, but she figured out it was a fake right away. She was really suspicious of everything Veera did."
"She was? Really?" Kairi shook her head slightly and leaned back. "She never seemed to pay attention to anything that happened in the place."
The comment made him laugh. "Yeah. She did, didn't she? Was all an act. To lull the people around her. She said she leaned a lot when people assumed she was too stupid to understand or pay attention. She said everything Veera did was shady. Something about thefts and her roommate and about a lack of paperwork."
"Huh… well… I'd be lying if I said I wasn't surprised. Maybe you should call her."
He sat up slowly and looked at her, curious about her train of thought. "Why?"
"Talk to her. See what else she may know, if anything."
"Again… why?"
She shrugged. "Because it'll give you another thing to do while you're avoiding."
He considered it for a moment before shrugging. "Fine. I'll call her. Got nothing to lose."
Kairi grinned widely. "And Kashi too?"
He crossed his arms and averted his gaze. "Maybe."
"What if I told you I already have his number?" She pulled her phone out of her pocket and flipped it open. "Sora gave it to me before he stopped talking to me."
"Kairi!"
She scrolled through her contacts. "Come on! You could call him now!"
Riku shook his head, his arms still crossed. "I changed my mind. I'm not doing it."
"I'm not telling you to sleep with the guy."
"Kairi!" He jumped up and headed towards the hall, wanting to get away from the badgering.
"Just a little harmless flirting. One date. That is… if you can even go on a date with someone."
That stopped him. He turned and walked back towards her. "What does that mean?"
"Have you ever been on a date?" She asked slowly, turning around in her chair to look at him.
"Of course."
A smile tugged at her lips. "That's a lie. You told me you've been in love with Sora forever."
"So? Doesn't mean I never dated anyone else."
She giggled slightly. "You never dated Sora. You got drunk and slept together. Then you didn't talk again for months and slept together again. You moved in together, got engaged, and broke up. There was never a single date."
"We were too busy." He admitted with a sigh and shook his head. "And by the time Sora told me, he wanted to lock himself up. We never got the chance."
"That's your problem." She rose from her chair and held out her phone, Kashi's number on the display. "You need practice."
"You need to stop talking now."
"You won't know if it'll work if you don't try."
With a sigh, he reached for her phone and pulled his own out. He programmed the number into his before closing both and handing hers back. "You are stubborn."
She laughed as she slipped her phone back in her pocket. "Pot calling the kettle black, huh?"
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
"You are joking with me, right Kashi?"
He shook his head as he looked across the living room at his sister.
"You are being completely honest? He just called you up and asked you out?"
Kashi nodded slowly.
Her eyes practically blazed as she glared at him. "You told him no, right?"
He cracked a smile and didn't answer.
"Kashi!"
"Hey." He shrugged. "The guy's hot and Sora doesn't want him."
Kitra crossed her arms as she leaned back in the chair she was sitting in. "Sora doesn't know what he wants."
Kashi let out a laugh. "Well… while he figures it out, I'm going out with Riku."
"Kashi, you can't." She rose and crossed the room towards her. Her similar form loomed over him as she pointed an accusing finger at him. "It's like… sick or something."
That made him smile. "Why?"
"How did he even know?"
Kashi shrugged and leaned back. "He saw me at the movie theater the other night. He thought I was stalking him."
"Well… you sort of were. Me too. And Sora."
"Well… he didn't see you or Sora." He said with a arrogant smile as he stood up. "He only saw me."
Her eyes narrowed. "You don't have to sound so smug about it."
"Why not? Sora doesn't own him."
"He's still wearing the ring."
He pushed her back slightly as he was getting annoyed at her lack of personal space. "Again… so what?"
"He's our friend." She snapped. "That's what. You don't date your friend's ex."
Kashi rolled his eyes. "I didn't ask him out. He went after me."
Kitra sighed and stepped back. She was getting tired of this. "Is there any way I can convince you not to do this?"
"No."
"Fine. Have fun." She sneered.
"Thank you. I will." He watched until she disappeared into her room. A smile spread across his lips as he went into his own. Sometimes it amazed him how stupid his sister thought him to be.
-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-
End of Chapter 22. Stay tuned for Chapter 23: Happy Birthday
Author's Notes: Yes. Muhahahaha! Little evil laughter.