My eyes are watering and I need some sleep, but you guys make me so happy to still be a functioning human being. :) Thank you to all who have reviewed/favourited/followed!
Disclaimer: Nah na na na na - wow, FANTASTIC BABY [props if you get this reference]
Without any further complications from the Vulcan or the doctor, the days slide by like pearls on a string. Even despite his misgivings, Kirk finds himself relaxing against all odds, the matter with the Argelians slipping into the back of his mind after he completes a report and sends it off to Starfleet. He makes sure to leave the whole 'out of body' experience out of the report, of course – the last thing he wants is an order to get back now to solve this matter. Knowing his luck, he'd probably get demoted for "not adhering to the standards set out by the Federation".
"So what do you think we should do when we hit shore leave?" Sulu asks, two weeks after the skirmish with the Argelians. "I hear Tu'van has some pretty awesome hiking trails."
Kirk snorts. "Hiking? Give me more credit than that, Sulu. We'll find something to do."
"Is it going to be illegal?"
The captain grins a lopsided grin. "What do you think?"
"Count me in," Sulu smirks. "Want to join us, Uhura?"
Uhura rolls her eyes, though both Kirk and Sulu know that she means it fondly. "No, thank you. You boys go ahead and have fun breaking all the rules. I'll just watch when you get arrested and thrown into jail."
"Well, you know what they say," Kirk says flippantly. "It isn't a party until somebody gets arrested."
"Chekov?" Sulu appeals to the teenager, who still has his head bent over his books and notepads. "Come on, man, you've got to get out of this ship."
"No, is okay," Chekov says, his voice distant. "You go ahead."
"Mr. Chekov," Kirk says in his best stern I'm your captain so you'd best obey voice, "I highly suggest that you vacate this ship at least once this shore leave. Actually, make that an order. I order you to leave this ship at least once."
"Aye, Captain," Chekov says in the same distant tone, still wrapped up in his equations.
"What about Mr. Spock and Doctor McCoy?" Sulu asks.
"You know, that is a fantastic question. Where are they, anyway?"
"Probably the med bay," Uhura says from behind her book.
Sulu begs off visiting the two of them, instead choosing to try and coax Chekov out of his obsession over his numbers, figures and equations. So Kirk heads down alone, nodding cheerfully at all the excited crew members as they chatter excitedly about the upcoming vacation. He figures they could all use the break – the unexpected attack by the Argelians had left a good number of souls shaken. His own nerves were unusually frayed due to his personal concerns about his two friends.
Kirk reflects on the activities he'd already scoped out for this shore leave. There was supposedly a mountain on the planet Tu'van that nobody had ever scaled because of how high it was. Which, of course, meant that he and Sulu were going to try and reach it, legends and myths about the snow monsters be damned. He figures that they stand a good chance since the locals are all about three feet high and unable to tolerate the cold up on the mountain, and if anything, both he and Sulu –
His train of thought stops when he opens the door to the med bay. Spock is sitting on one of the bio beds, looking bored beyond belief as Bones appears to be massaging his neck for him. "What the hell?" Kirk demands. "Is this your idea of foreplay, or something? Why didn't anyone tell me? I've got a crick in my neck, really need someone to sort it out-"
"I can break your neck for you," Bones offers, his voice tart. "That'll sort it, right?"
"Watch the tone, Bones, or I'll maroon you." Kirk grins. "Exactly what are you doing, anyway?"
"We thought it logical that Doctor McCoy should learn how to employ the Vulcan nerve pinch," Spock says in his monotone. "So far it is proving unsuccessful."
"I bet you didn't learn how to do it the first try," Bones retorts.
"You are correct, Doctor. I learned it on the second attempt."
"Well, a hop, skip, and a jump for you," Bones snaps. "Something you want, Jim, or did you come just to taunt us?"
"I actually came in to see what you were planning for shore leave, but this is fascinating, too." Kirk hops up on a bio bed.
"Careful, Captain, or else the doctor may just practice on you," Spock says.
"Look at that! He has a sense of humour after all. Didn't know you had it in you to make a joke, Spock," Kirk quips.
"It wasn't a joke," Bones mutters, going back to squint at Spock's exposed neck. "How the hell do you make it look so easy, man?"
"Practice," Spock deadpans.
"…That is a very disturbing idea."
"Is it? I was not aware. I would apologize if I had any remorse." Spock fixes his stare on Kirk, ignoring Bones' mutinous mutterings from behind him. "To return to your original point for visiting, Captain, I believe I have no concrete plans for shore leave."
"I don't, either," Bones says. "I'll probably be here all leave trying to figure out how to do this blasted pinch. And trying to teach Spock here how to operate on something without killing it."
"I am still under the impression that you were influencing the holographic simulation in order to see me fail."
"You stabbed the fake patient in the heart, I didn't influence you to do anything-"
"Maybe you two should go out together," Kirk suggests, tactfully ignoring the bickering. "Make a day of it. At least you two won't damage anything on the ship if you get into a fight."
"The Captain does present a convincing argument," Spock says – well, more like directs to Bones, since he is still facing forward. "It would also fit in with your suggested plan for acquainting ourselves with each other, Doctor."
"Fine, whatever. Will it shut the both of you up?"
"That's the way to take it, Bones," Kirk says in that maddeningly cheerful tone.
"And yourself, Captain? What plans do you have for shore leave?"
It is then that Kirk realizes how terrible this idea is, coming to Bones and Spock to tell them about his plans to scale an unscalable mountain on an alien planet that not many people have heard about. "Er, nothing," he stalls. "I think Sulu and I were just going to… hit up some local bars. You know, pick up some women. The uh, usual." He checks his wrist – "Oh, look at the time, it's almost my shift!" – and then flees the med bay, leaving only a slightly angry Bones and a resigned Spock behind.
"He's going to do something stupid, isn't he," Bones says. It's not even a question anymore.
"The likelihood of Jim performing a deed that may potentially lead to his death is very high, yes," Spock says.
"And Sulu's not going to say no, is he."
"Given that Lieutenant Sulu has been present for almost every one of Jim's 'stupid-ass decisions', as you have termed them, I believe that that is the general trend, yes."
"Can we fire him from being Jim's friend?"
"Though I do say that I concur with your sentiments, Doctor, I am afraid that that is not an avenue for us to pursue."
Bones only sighs and goes back to practicing. "Well, you'll have to mop him up if it comes to that. Okay. Let's try this again."
I don't put it past Spock to stab someone in surgery quite by accident. He's logical but does he also know what he's doing?
Much love,
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