Wizard: *comes out* WONDERFUL! WONDERFUL!
Elphaba: *comes out looking for a lever*
Wizard: What are you doing?
Elphaba: HEY GET LOST! I'M SETTING THESE MONKEYS FREE!
Wizard: But why?
YOU COULD BE WONDERFUL!
Elphaba: DON'T YOU REMEMBER WHAT I DID!? AND WHAT YOU SAID BEFORE?!
Wizard: But I don't care about the past! The past has passed!
Elphaba: DID YOU LEARN HAKUNA MATATA? YOU SHOULDN'T! IT'S KINDA CREEPY!
Wizard: Oh...
Elphaba: YOU DID!
Wizard: ...
Elphaba: How could you! THAT'S CREEPY!
Wizard: Okay... *runs off stage*
Elphaba: WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING!?
Wizard: TO THE BATHROOM!
Authoress 1: *gags* Next time! Don't use that bathroom!
Wizard: ...
Elphaba: *uncomfy* UGH!
Wizard: I'M BAA-AACCK!
~backstage~
Glinda: *eats a romantic meal with Boq*
Authoress 2: *comes backstage* TACOS I SEE! NICE!
Glinda: That's Elphie's! We're having Spaghetti!
Elphaba: *comes over* FOR ME?!
Boq: They are!
Elphaba: *takes one* THANKS! OLAY! *eats and went back on stage*
Boq & Glinda: *continue eating*
~on stage~
Wizard:
WONDERFUL! WONDERFUL!
Elphaba: BOY! WHAT AN ANNOYING WORD!
Wizard: *accidentally pulls lever while singing*
Monkeys: *comes out*
Elphaba: YAY!
Wizard: NO FAIR!
Elphaba: GO FLY! YOU'RE FREE! *cackles*
~meanwhile~
Boq & Glinda: *stares into each others eyes then lay down on the couch in Glinda's dressing room*
Boq: I'm so glad you're not Nessa!
Glinda: I'm so glad you're not Fiyero!
Boq: *kisses Glinda on the cheek, gazes into her eyes, and kisses her on the lips*
Glinda: *kisses back and soon falls asleep after*
Boq: *falls asleep just after Glinda*
~on stage~
Fiyero: *comes in with a gun and D.D. in cloth*
Wizard: ...
Elphaba: OH! Another monkey? *takes cloth off*
Fiyero: ELPHABA! DON'T!
D.D.: BAAAAAAAAA BAAAAAAAA!
Elphaba: I don't believe it!
Fiyero: *slaps forehead*
Elphaba: I thought he went on vacation! THIS IS A VACATION!?
D.D.: BAAAAAAAAAAA!
Wizard: *tilts head sideways*
Elphaba: DR. DILLAMOND! CAN'T YOU SPEAK?
Authoress 1: HE CAN'T! HE LOST HIS POWERS!
Elphaba: Well, that sucks! I guess you won't be able to grade my History paper now...
Authoress 2: I'll do it! *grades* A+!
Elphaba: Oh! Thank you!
Glinda: *backstage* WHAT ABOUT MINE?
Authoress 2: It's an...b!
Glinda: YAY!
Authoress 2: Minus..
Glinda: Crap!
D.D.: BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Elphaba: HE CAN'T SPEAK? EVER?
Wizard: I don't think so.
Elphaba: *gets mad* I DON'T TRUST YOU! AT ALL! YOU'RE DEAD!
Authoress 2: *leaves*
~meanwhile backstage~
Boq & Glinda: *still napping*
Nessa: *is apparently not dead* WHAT THE HELL, BOQ!
Boq: *woke startled* NESSA! I HATE YOU! I WAS ABOUT TO SAY I DO, BUT YOU WOKE ME! DAMN YOU!
Glinda: *wakes tiredly* Huh?
Boq: It's okay Hon! Go back to sleep! Nessa is being an idiot!
Nessa: *leaves*
Glinda: Okay! *falls back asleep in Boq's arm*
Boq: *falls back asleep*
~on stage~
Elphaba: *puts in bars where the flying monkeys were*
Wizard: *stands there with the funniest face ever* What are you doing, Elphaba?
Elphaba: Putting you in there for doing this to me!
Fiyero: *comes in* HOLD IT RIGHT THERE LADY!
Elphaba: YERO! *runs and hugs*
Fiyero: FAE! YOU'RE OKAY!
Wizard: YOU KNOW HER?
Fiyero: Noooo... I just went to school with her for 4 years and fell in love with her. YES I KNOW HER YOU BUFFOON!
Boq & Glinda: *wake up and goes onstage*
Glinda: What's going on?
Wizard: I don't know. What do you think, Galinda?
Glinda: IT'S GLINDA!
Wizard: WHATEVER! WILL YA LET ME OUT?!
Fiyero: I say... NO! BECAUSE THIS IS MY CHANCE TO TELL EVERYONE! ESPECIALLY YOU THREE! I! LOVE! ELPHABA!
Glinda: AWWWWWWWWWWWW! HOW CUTE!
Fiyero: And you're not yelling at me?
Glinda: No... Why would I? You silly goose! *giggles*
Elphaba: I thought you loved him?
Boq: No! I love her!
Fiyero: And I love Elphaba! Soooo much!
Elphaba: Wait a second... WHY ARE WE DOING THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE?
Glinda: Doing what?
Elphaba, Fiyero, & Boq: Falling in love with the wrong person!
Authoress 1: *was crying* Who set you guys up into a couple arrangement?
Glinda: YOUR BOSSY PARTNER OF YOURS!
Fiyero: You should really make her go to taco bell for a long time!
Glinda: She's a super silly goose!
Boq: *laughs at the way Glinda is talking*
Elphaba: Well! We had a wonderful stage reunion! Don't you think?
Wizard: Yes!
Elphaba: I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU SON OF A BISCUIT EATING BULLDOG!
Fiyero: Mind if we?
Elphaba: *gentle* Of course! To the forest!
Fiyero: See ya! *leaves with Elphaba*
Boq: *takes Glinda's hand and looks at her* And now we have the stage to ourselves!
M.M.: *comes in* What's going on here?
Glinda: SERIOUSLY? WHENEVER WE ARE ABOUT TO DO SOMETHING, YOU COME BY! DAMMIT!
M.M.: The script told me to come!
Glinda: DAMN YOU SCRIPT WRITERS! DAMN YOU!
Boq: What do you want you big fat M&M?
M.M.: I can't believe she was here! I want her back here or something so she'll be sorry!
Glinda: Who was here?
M.M.: Elphaba! We need a trap!
Boq: HOW ABOUT HER SISTER! BECAUSE I WANT HER GONE! SHE'S ANNOYING!
Glinda: *nods* I agree! Nessa has to be the most annoying one here today!
M.M.: OKAY! Then I'll cook her with a storm! *hears a tornado coming* Ahhh! I love the sound of this!
Boq & Glinda: YAY!
M.M.: *cackles*
Boq: *is creeped out* Wanna nap in the dressing room, Glinda?
Glinda: *nods tiredly*
Boq: Good! *sweeps Galinda off of her feet and carries her offstage*
M.M.: *walks off stage*