It didn't matter if the world ended at that moment. If a bomb exploded right next to them, it wouldn't matter. Sam could stay like this forever. He had waited so long for this moment, had dreamed about it everyday for the past 6 years, and it was just like he remembered. Actually, it was a million times better. She still smelled like roses, just like he remembered. He held her tight in his arms, kissed her with passion, and she reciprocated.

He really could do this forever, but something flicked in his brain. Dean. That was wrong, he just couldn't do that to his brother. As much as this was what he wanted the most in his life, some things came first. He stopped the kiss and looked in her eyes, still holding her face in his hands.

"I love you Jess. You have no idea how much. I thought about you every single day ever since we met. All I wanted in my life was to be with you. But I told you, I can't. I can't do that to Dean."

"I know."

They stayed in silence for a little while.

"Please, Jess, don't tell him. He'll hate me even more if he finds out for someone else. I need some time, but I have to be the one to tell him."

"Okay, Sam. I won't tell him. But I can't be with him anymore, after remembering everything, it's not fair to any of us."

Despite of everything, Sam was not a fan of this idea. He knew Dean was gonna be sad, and he hated that. But he also knew it would be even worse if they stayed together. Why things have to be this complicated?

"Just do what you have to do… I'm gonna gather courage to tell him."

Another moment of silence. Sam felt he was done, if he stayed there any longer, he might do something really dumb.

"I need to go, Jess. We'll talk later."

And he left.

Sam was just devastated. Kissing her and knowing he could never be with her made him feel even worse than he already did. He knew he had to tell Dean, but he just didn't know how. He didn't even know where to start.

2 days later, Dean arrived home and he didn't seem very happy. Sam was at the kitchen, and Dean didn't even wait for him to ask. He sat at the counter and started talking.

"Jess broke up with me."

Even though Sam knew this was coming, he felt bad anyway. His brother was hurting and he couldn't stand to see that. He sat by his side.

"Oh man, I'm sorry… did she say something?"

"Just that she was confused, she wasn't sure about what she wanted, she needed some time…"

Dean would hate him forever, but he deserved the truth. It was the least he deserved. Sam took a deep breath to gather some courage. He had to do it.

"Dean, I…"

"Hey guys! I'm home and starving!"

Jo. She chose that exact moment to arrive and come to the kitchen too. This talk would have to wait.

Couple days after that, Jo found Sam sitting on his bed, holding the photo of Jess and him. She sat by his side.

"So… rumor has it that Dean and Jess aren't together anymore."

He didn't look at her.

"Rumor confirmed."

"But he doesn't know the truth, right?"

"No… I asked Jess not to tell him, I'm the one who has to do it."

"Soo… why haven't you yet?"

"I'm gonna do it Jo, I just need courage."

"Better do it soon, Sam… the longer you take, the worst it will be."

"I'm gonna tell him Jo, I really am, Dean has to know the truth…"

"Dean has to know what?"

Sam and Jo turned their heads at the same time to the door, where Dean was standing. Sam got up and went towards him.

"Dean? Wha… what are you doing here?"

"What Sam, I can't get off work a little earlier and come home? I do live here, you know?" He stared at Sam for a few moments. "So… what is that truth I need to know?"

Sam turned to his sister.

"Jo, leave us alone, please."

He closed the door behind her and turned to Dean.

"Go ahead, Sam. I'm listening."

"Dean… I need to tell you something that happened. I understand if you hate me, but try to understand first, okay?"

"Sam, you're scaring me."

He picked up the photo he had left on the bed and handed it to Dean.

"Take a look at this."

Dean did as Sam asked, and his eyes widened immediately.

"You… and Jess… but when did you take this? You look… different."

"Look at the back."

"2001? San Diego? What the hell is this Sam?"

Sam asked Dean to sit down, and started telling him everything. How he had met Jess in that camping trip all those years ago, how he fell in love with her, how they were separated. How he couldn't tell anyone about her, not even Dean. How he thought about her every single day, how his biggest dream was finding her someday. How he was sure she was the love of his life.

He told Dean how devastating it was for him to finally finding her again as his brother's girlfriend. How he meant to tell Dean the truth, but gave up when he saw how happy he was. How he decided to keep it as a secret, since Jess had lost her memory, so nobody would find out. How he did that to see Dean happy, and how it killed him to be as close to Jess. He told Dean how she had found that same photo, but before she could do anything about it, she fell down the stairs and got her memory back. How she remembered Sam and how she confronted him about everything. And how that was the reason she broke up with Dean.

After Sam finished, it took a while for Dean to show a reaction. Sam waited. When Dean got up and looked at him, there was anger in his eyes.

"So, you lied to me all this time? Are you fucking kidding me, Sam?

"Dean, I to…"

"What? First you don't bother to tell me you met the woman of your dreams, because this is really no big deal at all. Then, you hide the truth from me, when I show up dating her, and why? Because you felt sorry for me? Because your poor cripple brother had finally found somebody that liked him for who he was, and if this didn't work out, he would never find anyone else? That it, Sam?"

That wasn't happening.

"Dean, I… of course not! I did this because you're always putting me before yourself, and I knew you would give up on her for me if you knew the truth… I did this because you were finally happy!"

"This is a lot of crap, Sam. I cannot believe you lied to me. You had to right to do that, I had the fucking right to know! If you truly cared about me, you would have told me, I don't care if it would hurt, we don't fucking lie to each other! You're an asshole, you know that?"

Sam took a few deep breaths.

"You know what Dean… I should have told you. I should have, that way you would know the pain I was feeling. Do you have any idea what it was for me to see Jessica every day, after spending every fucking minute of my life wondering where she was, if I was gonna ever see her again, and knew I could never have her? I should have told you and take her from you, and date her in front of you, I'm sure you would prefer that."

"Sam, she was your girl first, I would have understood! But the point is that you lied to me, this was a huge deal and you hit the truth! I can't forgive that Sam, I'm sorry. I can't even look at your face, don't talk to me, please."

And he left.

Dean spent the next days completely ignoring Sam. It was like he didn't exist. Sam was devastated with this silence treatment, but he knew Dean needed time. He just wished that ended eventually.

Sam came back from college and he was relieved to be off today, he wasn't on the mood to work, at all. He was alone, Dean and Jo were both at work (not that it mattered if Dean were home, it would be almost like being alone anyway), and he was divided between doing something to eat or taking a nap. Then, of course, there doorbell rang. And sure enough, it was Jess.

"Hey… come on in."

She passed by him to get into the apartment, but didn't meet his eyes. Sam waited, but she didn't say anything.

"So… how have you been?"

"You can imagine… I've been better. What about you? Must have heard I broke up with Dean."

"Yeah, I'm aware."

He motioned towards the couch and they both sat down.

"Did you tell him?"

"Yes."

"Judging by the look on your face, I guess it wasn't a happy talk."

"He's pissed because I lied to him. Because I never told him that I had met you, and also that his new girlfriend and I had a history together. I told him I did it because I wanted him to be happy, and he thinks it's because since he's a 'cripple', I didn't wanna ruin the only chance for him to be happy, since no other girl would be interested in him."

"That's bullshit, Sam."

"I know. But he doesn't understand. And he's right, I shouldn't have lied to him, it was wrong… He won't talk to me, he won't even listen to me. I don't wanna lose my brother, Jess."

She put a hand on his arm.

"You won't lose him Sam, he'll come around eventually."

"I hope so."

Silence. Jess was the first to break it.

"So… what about us? What's gonna happen now?"

He looked at Jess right in the eyes.

"There can't be 'us', Jess. How can we be together? How can I do that to Dean? I said, I can't lose my brother. I love you, you don't have the slightest idea how much, but I can't put anything before my brother. I just can't. He will never forgive me. We can't be together, whatever it is that we have, we must end it here. As much as it hurts."

He could see tears rolling down her face.

"So, we're just supposed to forget each other? How can you ask me to do that? I… I just remembered you."

He had to be strong, he knew that. His heart was bleeding, all he wanted to do was take her in his arms and go, and never look back, but he just couldn't do that.

"Just so you know… I'll never forget you, Jess. Never did, never will. I will never love anyone as much as I love you. Even if I met a thousand people, even if I lived a thousand years… even if I have a family, a wife and kids, it will always be you. Forever. Remember that."

There were more tears now, in both their faces. She tried to say something, but she couldn't. She took a deep breath, and all that came out was "I need to go."

"I want to give you something before you leave."

Sam went to his room and got a piece of paper from his drawer. He returned to the living room and gave it to her.

"I wrote you this, in one of the countless times I was thinking about you and missing you. I added the last verse after I found you." She started to unfold the paper, but he stopped her. "No, read later, not here please. Just… I wanted you to know."

Jess put a hand on his face and kissed him on the lips. It was wet and salty, and he couldn't think it would be the last one.

Then, still holding his face, she looked in his eyes.

"This is not the end, Sam."

Jess left Sam's place and she couldn't even see straight, with all the tears. She got into her car, and she was breathless. It took a few moments for her to calm down enough to open the piece of paper, firmly clutched in her hand. She wiped the tears away, and read it.

The day we met
Frozen, I held my breath
Right from the start
I knew that I found a home for my heart
Beats fast, colors and promises
How to be brave?
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubts, suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

I have died every day waiting for you
Darling, don't be afraid
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What's standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this

One step closer

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

Jess remembered Madam Ruby's words that day in the amusement park.

"When the time comes and everything tells you to give up on him, don't do it. Keep trying. You two are meant to be together, it's written in the stars."

It didn't matter how long it took. She wouldn't give up on Sam. They were really meant to be together.

Sorry again for taking so long to update, but here you go guys! It's almost in the end, prob a couple more chapters to go!

Did you like what Sam wrote? Do you recognize it?