CHAPTER 8: The Full Moon
The sunlight shone through the window of the first year Gryffindor boy's dormitory. James stirred and rolled over, opening his eyes. He looked over to see Sirius lying on his stomach with his hands under his chin.
'Damn it! Sorry, Sirius, I must have fallen asleep!' James said.
'It's ok. I think we all did. I woke up an hour or so ago. Peter's still sleeping,' Sirius explained, gesturing to the lump on the bed opposite him.
'Has he been ok?' James asked.
'I think so. I got up and checked and he's not been sick again. He doesn't look too tangled up so I'm guessing that he hasn't been tossing and turning much. I think he's just exhausted,' Sirius replied, looking over at Remus's sleeping form.
The alarm on Remus's watch started to go off and he and Peter began to wake. Peter sat up and rubbed his eyes and, on realising that he must have fallen asleep after all, mouthed a 'Sorry' to Sirius and James who smiled back at him. Remus pushed himself up on his hands and looked over at his friends who were all watching him with concern in their eyes.
'Morning,' Remus said. He felt awful. Even though he had already been sick, he was still nauseous and had a terrible headache. He felt really weak and irritable and he was very cold. Knowing that it was the full moon that very night he didn't want to appear out of the ordinary and smiled at his friends.
'How are you feeling, mate?' Sirius asked.
'I'm fine, just a bit tired,' Remus responded, knowing now that he was definitely getting better at lying.
'Remus, I don't think you should go to class today. We'll tell the professors that you're ill and you just stay here and rest,' James told him.
'Honestly James, I'm fine,' Remus smiled.
'Have you looked in a mirror today, Remus?' Peter asked, raising his eyebrows. After Remus shook his head in confusion, Peter continued, 'You're really pale, have massive dark circles under your eyes and I don't even have to come any closer to tell that you're all clammy.'
'I appreciate your concern, guys, but really, I'm fine,' Remus said, grabbing his robes and walking into the bathroom to get changed. The three boys shared exasperated looks and walked over to the locked bathroom door.
'Remus, I really don't think this is a good idea!' Peter called.
'Come on, just go back to bed,' James pleaded.
'With the state you were in last night, I'm sure the teachers won't mind if you take today off, even if you are feeling better,' Sirius told him.
Opening the door, a now changed Remus walked out of the bathroom.
'I don't think anyone else needs to know about last night,' Remus said.
'Mate, you fainted and you were sick. It's not a good idea to keep that to yourself. You're obviously ill,' Sirius said.
'Yes Sirius I was sick. Was. Past tense. I'm fine now. Can we just go to class, please?' Remus asked.
'Fine,' James sighed.
The four boys sat in their normal seats at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. James, Peter and Sirius were all talking quietly, trying to hide the glances they kept giving Remus who was getting, if possible, even paler and wasn't eating anything. James couldn't keep quiet about it anymore.
'Remus, you have to eat something.'
'I'm not hungry,' the boy replied.
'Like hell you aren't. You barely ate anything yesterday and what little you did eat, you threw up last night,' Sirius scolded.
'Here, just have one bit of toast, please?' Peter asked, passing the food over and placing it in front of Remus, who looked at it and pushed it away. The other three boys sighed.
'Hi Remus,' came a voice and the four Gryffindors turned to see Lily Evans approach them. 'How are you fee-' she stopped talking abruptly as she saw Remus's pale face. 'Oh, Remus, you look awful!'
'Thanks, Lily,' Remus replied, raising his eyebrows at her.
'What are you doing making him go to class like this?' she whispered angrily to James, Peter and Sirius whose eyes all widened to stare at her contemptuously.
'Excuse me? We told him to stay in bed! It was his bloody choice to get up; we couldn't very well tie him down, could we?' Sirius hissed back at her whilst James and Peter shared angry looks.
'You could have at least tried to make him stay, look at the state he's in!' she retorted.
'Well, we're all so terribly sorry Evans; perhaps you'd like to try and convince him to get back to bed? Obviously we didn't even TRY and make him! Oh wait, I'm pretty sure I remember all three of us telling him to for about half an hour this morning! But if you think you can do a better job, be my guest!' James shot at her.
'Yeah, we do actually care about him, you know! There is a little thing called 'friendship' that despite what you may think, we do take very seriously,' Peter joined in.
'Guys, shut up!' Remus sighed. 'I've got enough of a headache as it is without listening to you four going at it!'
'Well, get back to bed, then! Maybe then we'll shut up,' Sirius said.
'Fine!'
Remus stood up and swayed slightly. The four Gryffindors rushed to his side and all made it up towards Gryffindor tower together.
Remus got back into bed with his robes still on and glared up at the three boys and Lily, who, once again, had let herself into their dorm.
'Happy?' Remus asked stubbornly.
'Yes,' all four of them replied simultaneously.
'We're going back down to breakfast now. We'll bring you up some food at lunch and I don't expect to see you leave this bed, ok?' James instructed. When Remus didn't answer, he nodded and the four Gryffindors left the room.
James, Peter and Sirius headed to Defence against the Dark Arts after breakfast, with Remus still on their minds.
'Only Remus would be that ill and still want to go to class! I'd love to get out of class for a day!' Sirius said.
'Yeah, I often wonder how he's in Gryffindor. I'm glad he is and all that but really, he's got Ravenclaw written all over him,' James agreed.
'He's probably sitting up there in bed worrying about the notes he's going to miss rather than resting like he should be,' Peter sighed.
Remus, however, was not worrying about missing notes at all. In fact, after his friends had left the room, he gave them five minutes to get well away from Gryffindor Tower as they headed down to breakfast, then left the common room and headed straight to his first class. He was sitting in his seat, waiting for the rest of the class to arrive when his three friends opened the door and entered. When they saw him, they stopped dead and stared at him in exasperation.
'Lupin! What the hell do you think you're doing?' Sirius hissed as he stormed over and took his seat next to the pale boy.
'Going to class. I believe that is the point of school,' he replied calmly.
'Oh, ha ha, very bloody funny,' James said, glaring at Remus.
'Honestly, for such a smart guy, you can be a right idiot sometimes,' Peter sighed, looking at Remus as if he's gone completely insane.
Remus just shrugged and turned to the front of the class as the lesson began. He knew that he shouldn't have come but it seemed the only option that he had. Professor Dumbledore had explained in his letter all those months ago that if Remus wanted to miss classes the day before and the day after his transformation, the teachers would not mind in the slightest but Remus wasn't worried about getting into trouble. If he were continually ill the day of the full moon it wouldn't take long before someone worked it out. At least if he only disappeared at night, not many people would notice, but if he missed classes, practically the whole year would notice and he couldn't afford to let that happen. He was grateful for his friends concern but he just couldn't miss any lessons. He didn't know how he could ever possibly make them understand, but they just had to leave him to it.
The first two classes of the day passed by quickly with the three boys trying very hard to ignore Remus, which proved to be much more difficult than they had originally thought and they all walked to lunch together talking as normal. They all sat down in their usual seats and tucked in with Remus, as expected, not eating a single thing.
'Remus, really, you're being an idiot,' James sighed.
'You've got to eat something, mate,' Sirius agreed.
'Yeah, you'll just end up fainting again,' Peter said.
'I don't feel like eating,' Remus told them, truthfully. His nausea was getting worse and his head felt like it was going to split in two. If he was being totally honest with himself, he didn't think he would be able to pick up any cutlery with how weak he was feeling.
'Which roughly translates into 'I feel sick',' Sirius said.
'Which roughly translates into 'I should have stayed in bed',' James added.
'Which roughly translates into 'James, Sirius and Peter were right and I should have listened to them',' Peter piled on.
Remus simply glared at them.
'Well, we've got Transfiguration and then a free period before dinner, so you only have one more class left,' James told him, his tone softening.
Remus nodded and the three boys looked at him expectantly but when he still didn't eat anything, they sighed and began to talk amongst themselves again.
'Today we will be continuing with our work on trying to transfigure a match into a needle. I assume you all remember the spell, if not it is on the board. Proceed!'
Three of the four Gryffindors were sitting in their seats at the back corner of the classroom talking animatedly without even attempting to transfigure the matches on their desk. This being Remus's first ever Transfiguration lesson, he rolled his eyes and his friends and turned his attention to the wooden splint in front of him. With the correct wand movements, he muttered the incantation and saw the sharp metal form of a needle in front of him.
'Very well done, Mr Lupin! 10 points to Gryffindor!' Professor McGonagall said, having seen the magic. 'Could you come here for a minute, please?'
Remus stood up and walked over to the teacher who gestured into a large cupboard behind her desk at the front of the classroom. The boy nodded and followed her into it.
'Mr Lupin, it is purely your choice and I'm glad that you care about your education enough to do this, but I feel obliged to tell you that you don't have to come to class the day of your transformation if you don't feel up to it.'
'I know. I just didn't want to give people any reason to be suspicious about why I wasn't there and why I'm always missing on the day of the full moon. I thought if I showed up for classes, less people would notice if I disappeared at night. I can't have anyone finding out,' Remus explained.
'That is your decision, but I want you to be completely honest with me when I ask you if you truly feel up to this today?'
'I'm ok. I feel a bit weak and ill, but one can only expect that when affected with lycanthropy. I've been dealing with this since I was four, and it's not really any worse that it usually is,' he replied.
'Well, if you're sure. You may go Mr Lupin,' the stern teacher dismissed. Watching him retreat back to his seat in the classroom her gaze softened. He didn't deserve this.
The four friends all sat together at dinner and, of course, once again Remus wasn't eating anything. For the first time, the three chose to not say anything just looked at him with raised eyebrows. After dinner was over Remus stood up and swayed so much he had to sit back down again.
'Right!' Sirius said, grabbing the thin boy in his strong arms, 'Hospital Wing with you!' and proceeded to drag the smaller boy all the way there.
'MADAM POMFREY!' James yelled when they entered the room.
The kind looking lady bustled out of her office. 'You can't shout like that in here!'
'Sorry,' Sirius said. 'We were just bringing you this twat who was ill last night yet refused to stay in bed, eat, or come here even though we've been telling him to all day.'
'All right, you leave him with me. Come on, Mr Lupin. You boys can leave now. I'll look after you friend for you,' Madam Pomfrey said, taking hold of Remus's arm.
Once James, Sirius and Peter left, Remus sat down on one of the beds and waited for the moon to rise.
The tunnel was very dark. Madam Pomfrey lead him to the door, wished him luck and left, promising to come and get him in the morning.
Remus watched her leave and opened the door in front of him to see a large, spacious room. It was at least five times bigger than his basement at home and there were no chains to hold him down. He liked it, and prayed that the wolf did too. He sat in the middle of the floor and waited for the moon to come.
A jolt of pain shot across Remus's chest and he cried out. Sickening snaps echoed around the room as each of his bones broke and reformed. Claws tore their way through his hands and feet, ripping the skin and bleeding. His spine pushed out against his skin, stretching to the point when it was almost torn as a tail appeared. Small droplets of blood were pushed out of the boy's pores all over his body as fur erupted over his skin. Remus screamed and rolled around on the floor, pain shooting through every part of him like fire. Tears rolled down his face as his cheekbones snapped and his jaw broke and everything went black. Where the boy had been now stood a huge wolf with yellow eyes darting around the room searching for a human being to sink its teeth into. It didn't recognise this place. It hadn't been here before. It ran around the room looking for anything it could bite, anything it could eat. Upon finding none it threw itself against the walls, windows and doors trying to escape, eventually turning on itself. The wolf clawed and bit itself until it could taste blood and continued all through the night.
As the sun began to rise again, the wolf's bones snapped and its fur seemed to be pushed back inside itself, turning back into pale skin. Its organs crushed themselves back together and its howling merged into screams of pain. After a few minutes of excruciating pain, Remus was lying on the floor of the room, bleeding and broken until he passed out and the world went black once more.