Pre-Comment: Some throw fits. Others throw lamps. She throws knives.

Chapter Five: So You Throw Knives, Huh?

Name: Shinozaki Sayoko

Objective: To obtain part-time employment at Pizza Hut in order to learn all their se—to make the best pizza in the world.

Skill sets: Sewing, baking, cooking, cleaning, mending, repairing, throwing knives and various other sharp objects, keeping secrets.

Past Employment: Registered Nurse.

ooo

There were some things in the world you just don't question.

Why does apple pie taste so good?

Why do all the best oranges always seem to come from California?

Will the coyote ever catch that road runner?

Lots of these, and many more, were often accompanied by titles such as 'mysteries of the universe,' 'great wonder of the world,' or other equivalent and appropriate names. Some had warning signs on them, with clear conclusions, telling you it's best not to poke your nose where it ought not to belong. Others were the do not push sign on a big red button.

Skill: Throwing knives.

Lydic Verell wanted to push that button.

Clasping his hands together in front of him, he gave her a warm, friendly smile. "Sayoko, is it?"

She gave a simple nod.

"You seem to be very adept at what you do."

Like throwing knives.

"Thank you."

"It's a very impressive resume."

Is it missing a circus aspect?

"Thank you."

"I'm almost positive that Pizza Hut could use someone of your specific talents."

How good is your aim?

"It would be a pleasure."

To plant one right between the eyes?

Oh, there was just so much temptation. Normally it wouldn't bother him and he would just ask straight out, but then he had to start wondering: Why put something like that on an otherwise perfectly good resume? (Not only that, but he was afraid of the repercussions of such an action.)

Was it a button worth pushing?

Or at least poking with a stick?

Or maybe tapping it a little with that stick?

And, if the button just so happened to be, well, accidentally pushed, would he end up with something sharp and pointy sticking out of him with a severe need for a hospital and heart surgeon if God gave him that much time?

"I'm curious about something you'll have to enlighten me upon."

"Of course," she responded in that polite, sweet sort of way.

"How good at it are you?"

Sayoko blinked.

" 'It'?"

Lydic nodded towards the piece of paper lying in front of him on his desk. "You know. On your resume."

Enlightenment.

"Oh. Well I'm very good at it. I can bake almost anything. My previous employer won't admit it, but he learned how to bake from me. It was for his younger sister's birthday. It was very sweet of him, but—and you mustn't ever mention it to him—I made a replica of it in time for the party so as not to hurt his feelings. Or poison everyone."

Lydic cleared his throat.

"Fascinating."

No, tell me about the knives.

The knives.

"And… how about this… other skill of yours?"

Sayoko hummed thoughtfully. "I'm still not very good at French cuisine, but I have fully mastered Japanese, Britannian, Chinese, and German foods. Some of their confectionaries are hard to prepare, however."

Lydic cleared his throat. "Yes, yes, that's all well and good. But…"

Skill: Throwing knives.

Do or die.

(But hopefully not the latter as a result of the former.)

"…this, uh, knife skill of yours."

Tilting her head, Sayoko betrayed no other significant show of emotion other than a slight smile. "Oh, you're interested in that little talent? It's nothing special, really."

Lydic sputtered slightly.

Nothing special?

Nothing special?

Being able to hum in-tune was nothing special.

Being able to walk and chew gum at the same time was nothing special.

Being able to consume every flavour of whiskey, vodka, and scotch known to man within a twenty-four hour time period was nothing special.

(Well, in his opinion at least.)

Being able to throw knives was not just nothing special.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Lydic rose from his seat. "You throw knives! It's not every day you find someone who can do that! It's not every day you find someone who puts this sort of skill on a resume!" he exclaimed, waving his hands around excitedly.

Sayoko hummed thoughtfully. "Really?"

"Yes really. So tell me, did you work for the army?

She blinked in surprise. "The army?"

"Are you part of a secret order of assassin's hell-bent on upholding the laws of the underworld? Are you affiliated with a syndi—"

"Mister Verell," Sayoko started, shaking her head politely, "I think you—"

"—mission to kill anyone who gets in the way of your organization? Or how about—"

"Mister Verell, please, it's—"

"—cover for important people with a double life? Or maybe you're a special part of the CIA sent in to keep tabs on dirty dealings? Then what about a circus escapee who—"

"Would you like me to show you?"

Lydic paused mid-sentence.

Process.

Think.

And then—

"Really?" he gasped, eyes lighting up like Vegas.

She smiled and nodded. "I'd be happy to."

Paperwork.

More and more paperwork.

She had always wondered why someone in middle-management at Pizza Hut would need an assistant or secretary of any kind. Even if he was a sort of regional manager, it was still very, very curious. Head Office didn't tell her specifically why either.

Which was even more curious.

Well.

Now that she was actually here… mystery solved.

"He is SO lazy!" she cried in frustration.

A hand landed on her shoulder and she jumped in alarm, spinning towards it as the hand withdrew. Nakuru sighed in relief, "Oh, it's just you, Miss Sayoko. So, how did the interview with Mr Verell go?"

The woman gave her an apologetic look. "It doesn't look like I'll be a good fit here after all."

Nakuru's face fell. She had spent over half an hour discussing the best way to make chiffon cake with the woman prior to the interview and was potentially looking forward to working with her.

"Oh. That's a shame."

The woman bowed her head slightly. "Truly. I'll have to get going now—and, do be careful when removing them, they're very sharp."

Nakuru blinked in justified confusion. "Uh… okay."

"Well then, have a good day," she said sweetly, smiling before giving a polite bow and heading out.

Sighing, Nakuru shrugged and returned to her paperwork before remembering there was a stack of such paperwork that needed Lydic's signature.

Man, if she could just manage to loop his 'Y' right she wouldn't need it ever again.

Getting up to leave her desk, she walked down the short corridor to his office and knocked. Upon receiving a somewhat haggard 'Come in' she turned the knob stepping through.

"Lydic, I need you to—Holy Heaven!"

A total of fifteen small (throwing!) knives kept Lydic pinned to the ceiling by his clothing. They didn't look like they were going to budge any time soon—or very easily.

"Lydic, what—"

"Don't ask."

"But—"

"Don't ask."

"Sorry, but it's just that—"

"Damn it all, Lydia! I told you not to ask!"

Brown eyes narrowed in a glare. Striding over to his desk, she placed the small stack of forms needing his signature on the desk with a slam. Turning on her heel she headed straight back for the door.

Lydic's eyes widened. "Wait! Stop you can't just—! I'm sorry! Please—"

Whirling in fury, Nakuru fixed him with a glare. "I'll need your signature on those by the end of today. And, for the last time: My name is NAKURU!"

SLAM.

Lydic sighed.

"Fishsticks."

Comments:

Ah… Sayoko was the hardest to write. Simply because… well… as an employee, I think she'd be fabulous. Good at her job. Considerate. Cheerful. Quiet. Pretty. Ninja. Heck. I want her serving me tea every morning. And sticking my enemies like pigs.

But you never heard me say that.

So, with much ado:

Wanted: A part-time employee for one of the world's largest pizza chains.

You vote it, I'll write it.

Please R&R.

- Minute Maid

Beverage of Queens.

P.S. How many of you "Liar Liar" fans thought it would be someone else?