She lost herself sometimes, the longer she stayed a dragon without changing her skin. She only had flashes of memories of those times but it was normally blank pages in her mind. But this one, this one she now could remember.

It had been during her time with Smaug, which she had come to figure was less than a decade. They had been traveling, something that had taken her long enough to convince him of – though she truly did love to fly. They had just set their feet on the ground, having been flying all day, settling on the western outskirts of the Greenwood.

Smaug heated the ground and she curled herself on top of it, moving so he could curl around her. He settled his great red head over her neck, a dragon's means of security and safety for their females. Smaug did not know she was a skin changer, not yet; he cast her out when he did discover her human form. But at that time, they rested peacefully.

It was not long before dawn that they were awoken. Not to any sound, no, elves hardly make a sound when they did not wish to. But they smelled, of earth and leaves, but there was something sweet in their scent. And it was that to which the dragons were alerted.

Smaug was not viciously cruel, though he had a temper – one she had tested numerous times. But as any creature he did not like to be disturbed, and he liked it even less to find unwanted visitors in his territory. On any other given day Smaug might have let the elves run by, so long as they did not come too close. But he was particularly territorial on that day, as any male would be with a threat so close to a female and the days so near the season of mating. And so he stood, a gleam in his serpentine eyes, facing the trees. She stood along with him, humanity but a small speck in her mind, so over clouded with instinct she let loose a wall of flame at the trees the same time Smaug did.

And as the yells and screams reached their twitching ears, they both charged. Smaug took the fleeing elves to the north and she to the south. She cared little for their taste, they were awfully thin compared to other animals, but a few she speared with her sharp teeth and swallowed. She had just burned three when she heard the snapping of a twig, and she raced in the direction of the fleeing elf.

She could smell his fear, it was nearly palpable. The trees were nothing to her, she simply ran through them. But a small piece hit him and he fell, allowing her slow to stop directly above him. His blue eyes were wide with fear, his breaths coming in deep pants, his entire body quivering with absolute terror.

It would be easy to kill him, there were so many ways; she could step on him, pierce him with a talon, eat him, burn him, fling him against a tree, or leave him to Smaug. But staring down at him, feeling how afraid he was, she remembered what she had forgotten; that she was human. She was not supposed to be doing this, she should not have killed the others. And so she did not kill him, though she told Smaug she had killed them all.

…

Legolas returned to her after many days, not able to push aside in his mind the fact that the dragon woman had spared him. She was sitting with her back against the wall sleeping when he stopped in front of her cell. The prison was so large now that she was a woman, and he stood staring at her sleeping face. She looked so peaceful, so harmless. Until she opened her eyes, that was where the sense of danger came from – those golden eyes.

"Why did you let me live?" he demanded when he saw she would say nothing. He stared hard at her seeing she would not answer him, the proof in her clenched jaw. "You killed the others, you killed them without thought. Why did you spare me? What makes me different?"

She laughed at him, a dark sardonic sound. "You think too highly of yourself."

That offended him, not only because of her words but because she had been the one to say them. "Do not mock me dragon," he said angrily, spitting the word dragon.

She did no more than turn her heard toward him and stare at him blandly. "It had little to do with you," she told him honestly.

He stepped closer to the door of her cell, looking at her through the wooden bars. "Then what was your reason?"

She stared long at him unmoving, her eyes making him uneasy, something that nearly made her smile. "You reminded me I was human," she answered honestly, surprising him.

"Do you not know humanity as a dragon?" he asked curiously, realizing she hadn't had to have spoken to him at all. In fact she had no reason to answer him, and then he was left wondering why she had.

She turned her eyes away from him, thinking back to that time. There were so many blank spaces in her memory. "I had been a dragon for eight years," she told him. "The beast that attacked your people was in essence a dragon. Until I saw your fear."

He was left standing outside of her prison staring at her wondering many things; one of which being if she had truly done any wrong – if it was true she had not been of human mind then how could she have known better than to attack? He did not like the answer he found.

"You should not be down here."

Legolas turned to see Tauriel coming to stand before him. "This is the dragon,"

"That slaughtered our people," she finished angrily.

"Who gave me my life," he said, what he had meant to say though Tauriel's words had effected him and now he was thinking of those the dragon had killed.

Tauriel stared at him appalled. "That makes no difference," she insisted.

"Perhaps it does," he said softly.

"She slayed my brother," Tauriel yelled. "She is a monster."

All of this they had spoken in the elven tongue, which she did not understand – though she knew the redhaired elf bore her no love, it was in the tone of her voice and the fire in her eyes.

Tauriel turned to see the dragon looking at her. "It is best to leave beasts to rot," she sneered, hating the woman. Her words did not have the desired effect and Tauriel stared warily as the woman smiled.

Both elves nearly jumped when suddenly she was dragon, and they were shocked silent at the mind numbing roar that she let loose. As quickly as she was a dragon she was a woman again. "Was that enough of an animal for you?" she asked tauntingly before she sat once more.

The stone wall was cold against her skin, the back of her dress having torn both times her wing had unfurled. She turned her head to look at the elf prince, seeing him still watching her. And then he left, leaving her alone in the dark once more.