Disclaimer Don't own the Boosh. Only Jade.
Chapter 4 - Love at first sight and room for one more.
Jade finally calmed down enough and stood up walking around the shop every now and then glancing out the window. "So let me see if I got this right, you know what that thing was?" She asked turning to Naboo.
Just as Naboo was about to answer the door to the shop tinkled and in walked Saboo holding Tony Harrison tucked up under one arm. Jade turned around in Saboo's eyes it was in slow motion her hair fanning out behind her as if someone had a fan turned on her. A tunnel of white light surrounding her as if she were the only person in the room. Birds were singing and somewhere in the distance a voice could be heard very faintly.
"Saboo. . . Saboo. . . oh my word are you high again." Tony tried to get through to him.
"What's wrong with him?" Vince asked waving a hand in front of Saboo's face.
"Saboo. . ." Tony called again before reaching up and slapping him across the face with a tentacle. Saboo shook his head clearing his thoughts. Jade looked at the two.
"That's the thing that I was talking about." She said pointing at Tony before her eyes rolled up in her head and she fell back. Naboo reached out and caught her before she hit the floor.
"Bollo. Bring her upstairs and put her in my room. "
The big ape came over and picked up Jade tossing her over his shoulder before taking off up the stairs. Once up there he brought her down the hall of the flat to Naboo's room. He kicked the door open with his foot and placed her down on the bed amid all the silky sheets and fluffy pillows.
"Nooooooooooooooo!" Fossil yelled flailing his arms over his head as he ran down the street.
"Oi, get back here. I'm gonna cut you up." Hitcher ran behind trying to catch him. He stopped suddenly. "Oh me backs gone. Get 'im boys!"
"No don't. . . I'll give you anything. Here take my gum, my belly button lint, my wallet, just don't hurt me . . . MOMMY!"
"Hold on a minute boys don't cut up this slag jus' yet." Hitcher said looking through the wallet. "Save that for later." He said shoving some money into his pockets. "What 'ave we here? Who's the bird?'
"Fossil walked over and looked over the Hitcher's shoulder at the photo in the wallet. "Oh she's my cousin. She's new here."
"Tell you what squire, I won't gut you where you stand if you can bring her to me.
"Yeah, okay. I can do that. Just don't hurt me nice green man." Fossil replied stroking the Hitchers arm.
"Touch me again and I'll skin ya boy."
Jade moaned moving her head from side to side before her eyes fluttered open she could here people talking.
"Shhh, you'll wake her. "
"This is all your fault ya pink cleft."
"I think she's coming round."
. She looked around and panicked for a minute before it hit her. She must have passed out. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. "Oh my head. . ."
Naboo handed her a glass full of a stranger bluish purple liquid. She took it and knocked it back like she was doing shots.
"Naboo what is that you gave her?" Howard asked.
"It's juice of chameleon mixed with newts eyes and vipers tail."
With that Jade did a spit take and spat the liquid out covering Tony and Saboo.
"Sorry." Jade apologized to Saboo and Tony before looking to Naboo. "Why would you give me something like that?"
"He's a Shaman." Vince pipped up from the other side of the room.
"Oh this will never come out. My dry cleaning bill will enormous. This my friends is an outrage!"
"What cleaning bill ? You don't wear clothes Tony." Saboo said.
Flash forward a few minutes
"So let me see if I got this right. Your a shaman." Jade pointed at Naboo. "And the urban cowboy over there is a shaman and the pink thing I tossed like a football is a shaman. . ."
"Thing... I'll have you know I . . ." Tony was silenced with a smack to the back of the head by Saboo.
"You two are normal right? Well except for you with the extremely small eyes." Jade asked pointing to Vince and Howard.
"Where is the stature?" Saboo asked staring like a love sick puppy.
"The one that looks like Bryan Ferry? It's in my hotel room."
"Have you played with it?" Saboo asked.
"Played with it.. . . no you sick perv!"
"I . . I didn't mean like that."
Naboo rolled his eyes and sat on his bed next to Jade. "Let me explain. The statue isn't a statue really. It holds a great evil. It's kind of like a mini cosmical jail. When the pieces move it will unlock and open."
"Well I don't know about opening but I thought it was glowing faintly when I came out of the shower."
"Where is it now?"
"Still at my hotel."
"Tea's here." Bollo said walking into the room with a tray full of tea and treats.
Jade shook her head and rubbed her eyes again. "I'm sorry did that ape just talk?"
"That's Bollo he's my familiar."
"Oh you are so not in Kansas anymore Dorothy." Jade mumbled to herself.
Bollo set down the tea tray on the edge of the bed between Jade and the others. Saboo grabbed a cup and poured some tea. "Here take this."
"There's nothing weird in it is there?"
"No just tea." Naboo replied before pouring his own cup. "Thanks." Jade said before taking a sip.
"I have to ask what happens if it opens? It's not good is it?"
"Not a chance sunshine." Tony replied from his spot on the dresser.
"If you want we can go get it. It's not far from here."
Everyone walked through the flat and headed downstairs to the shop. Jade and Naboo were two of the last ones out of the bedroom. She looked around at the flat as they went. "This place is wicked. I wish I had a place like this."
"I have an extra room if you'd like."
Jade stopped on a dime and turned to face the tiny shaman. "Are you serious?" I've been looking for a place." Suddenly the excitement drained out of her voice and she began to frown.
"What's wrong."
"I wouldn't have a way to pay you. I don't have a job and the money I have is almost all gone."
" You can work in the shop. . ."
Jades eyes lit up again. "I can? Oh Naboo your a prince!" Jade said as she hugged him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. At just that moment Saboo had walked back up the stairs and saw Naboo and Jade in their embrace and let out a small growl under his breath.