I do not own Phineas and Ferb.

Let us all pretend that Sleepwalk Surprise happened before Across the Second Dimension.

First Day

The routine was the same for the next week. The new agents would get up and meet at the tree at six twenty in the morning. Candace would be late and Stacy would have to try a variety of methods to get the lazy teen out of bed (Perry's personal favourite was when Stacy dumped a bucket of ice cold water over the sleeping Candace) and they would all spend the day doing different exercises.

By the end of the week Monogram decided that they had advanced enough to go on their first field mission. Candace managed to climb tall structures without freaking out, Phineas and Ferb could do triple backflips, Baljeet was picking up speed during the daily sprints and Buford managed not to shoot any of his teammates during target practice.

As for the Fireside Girls...well, they were the Fireside Girls. Their multitude of patches already gave them more of an advantage than anyone else.

At the end of the last training session, Monogram motioned for the kids and their animal partners to gather in front of him. "I must say, you've all been working hard and I can see it's paying off. You still have a bit to go before you become skilled like your partners, but I think you're all ready to go on your first mission."

"Yes!" Phineas exclaimed, doing a handstand in glee.

Candace leaned over and pushed her little brother sideways. Phineas yelped and toppled over, sprawling on the deep purple tiled floor. "Thanks sis."

Monogram cleared his throat. "Your animal partners will meet you tomorrow morning at seven. You'll get your briefings and from then on you will listen to your partners and work together. Remember, you are fighting for the Tri-State Area."

"Yes sir!" the kids shouted, saluting him.

"Excellent. See you all tomorrow morning." Major Monogram nodded and left as Carl entered. The intern was holding a box full of metal bracelets. Phineas and Ferb's eyes widened in curiosity and they inched forwards.

"What are those?"

"These are how you'll be able to disguise yourselves." Carl plucked a thin metal bracelet from the top of the pile and held it out. It had one green button, one blue button, one red button and one yellow button. "It's easier for our animal agents to avoid detection. After all, a panda looks the same as another panda. But a person doesn't have that luxury."

"So those are cloaking devices?" Phineas asked eagerly.

"You got it. If you press the green button the bracelet will make your appearance different. Here Phineas, give it a try."

Phineas took the bracelet and slipped it on. He pressed the green button and waited. "Did something happen?"

"Look in the mirror," Isabella said breathlessly, digging out her compact mirror from her pocket and holding it out.

"Awesome!" Phineas cried. His red hair was longer and now blonde. His blue eyes were black and his nose was considerably shorter. "Which button do I press to go back to normal?"

"The red one," Carl informed.

Phineas pressed the red button and grinned. "That is so cool! Do you invent stuff like this often?"

"I dabble." Carl shrugged. "Now, the blue button will allow you to contact the agency. Just hold the bracelet up to your mouth and speak into it. You'll be able to hear our responses clearly. The yellow button sends us a distress single. We'll be able to trace your location and help you."

The new kid agents received a bracelet. "Don't play around with it," Carl warned. "It's not a toy."

"We won't," Isabella promised. "Thanks Carl."

"No problem. Now you better get going. You have a big day tomorrow."

...

At quarter to seven Phineas and Ferb carefully opened Candace's bedroom door. The room was dark and there was a lump underneath the pink and purple blanket. With mischievous grins the two brothers raced into the room and jumped on top of their sister.

"Wake up!" Phineas shouted as Ferb poked her playfully in the side.

Candace shrieked loudly and shoved her siblings off of her. Scowling she shoved her tousled hair out of her face and glowered at them. "You better have a good reason for attacking me while I'm trying to get my beauty rest."

Phineas grinned up at her from the floor. "You only have fifteen minutes to get ready."

"And that means you only get ten minutes in the shower instead of your usual twenty," Ferb added.

"Brothers," Candace muttered. But she climbed out of bed and snatched some clean clothes from her closet. A minute later the brothers could hear the shower running and Candace's soft humming.

"Mission accomplished." Phineas grinned. "I can't wait to say that when we foil Dr. D."

Perry waddled into the bedroom in his pet form. Phineas smiled. "No need to do that, buddy. Mom and Dad left at dawn for their antique convention."

The platypus chattered and stood up. Are you ready?

Phineas managed to interpret the chatter correctly. "Yeah, I'm pumped!"

Ferb nodded.

Someone hammered on the front door downstairs and Phineas hurried down the wooden staircase. Ferb trailed behind carrying Perry.

"Hey, Stacy!" Phineas greeted after he swung the door open. "Is Agent S meeting you here?"

"Actually, he came to me first," the Asian American teen explained, shifting her shoulder so they could get a clear view of the snail perched there. "He seems to know that Candace isn't one to be fast in the mornings."

Phineas listened intently. He could no longer here the rushing of water. "Well, I think she just got out of the shower. So I think she'll be down soon."

"I'll just wait in the living room." Stacy walked into the house as if it were her own-she certainly spent enough time there-and started flicking through the channels on the television.

The grandfather clock in the front hall struck seven and Phineas beamed. "Mission time! Let's-oh, hold on. Candace! Stacy and Agent S are here!"

"I'll be down in a few minutes!"

"Okay!" Phineas lowered his voice. "Alright, let's go!"

...

"Baljeet?"

The Indian child froze by the front door. He glanced over his shoulder at his mother, who was holding a coffee cup and wearing her housecoat. "Son, why are you holding a panda? Wait, let me ask a better question. Where did you get a panda?"

Baljeet grinned nervously and adjusted his grip on Agent P. "Er...it is a new toy."

"It's blinking."

"It is a very expensive new toy that I got from the Internet," Baljeet elaborated, hoping his mother wouldn't care enough to ask further questions.

Thankfully, Mrs. Tjinder did not function properly in the early morning and so shrugged and went back into the kitchen. Baljeet let out a sigh of relief before rushing out the front door and grabbing his recumbent from the garage. "You can just sit in my lap," he told the panda.

The duo biked to Buford's house, where the burly child was lounging on his front porch. "Geez took you long enough."

Ignoring him, Baljeet climbed off his recumbent and wiped the sweat from his forehead. "Are we ready to go?"

Agent P nodded and motioned for them to follow. The two boys went up the front steps of the porch and approached the welcome mat. Buford arched an eyebrow. "Are you telling me there's been a secret entrance under this thing the whole time?"

Agent P nodded and yanked on a piece of loose thread. The mat sprung up, revealing another tube slide.

"We are going first," Baljeet said firmly, pushing past Buford and jumping down the slide with Agent P close behind.

Buford scowled. "A guy gets stuck one time..."

The three landed into Agent P's pink and fluffy lair. Agent P landed neatly on the cushy pink couch while Buford bounced right off and Baljeet landed upside-down. The screen buzzed to life and Admiral Acronym appeared.

"Ah, so you are my new agents. It's rather odd seeing humans in my division but I suppose I'll get used to it. You are Baljeet Tjinder and Buford van Stomm, correct?"

Baljeet smiled. "Yes ma'am. It is very nice to meet you."

"Charmed," Buford croaked, trying not to breathe in the heavy lavender smell.

"I am Admiral Acronym-your superior officer. As this is your first mission, I will not be so critical. But I expect perfect behaviour and conduct during future missions. And you will always listen to my orders and those of Agent P. Understood?"

"Understood!" Baljeet parroted obediently.

Buford could only nod.

"Good. Professor Dementia has bought up all the glue in the Tri-State Area. Go and find out what he's up to and stop him. Oh, and boys...if the name isn't a giveaway, Professor Dementia is a bit-"

"Insane?" Baljeet supplied.

"Very insane. Good luck, boys."

The three saluted her and Agent P hustled them over to his small black and white hoverjet. It took a bit to squeeze Buford in but soon they were soaring through the skies.

"I am getting airsick," Baljeet moaned, leaning over the side.

Buford snorted. "Don't be a wimp."

An old, crumbling warehouse on the outskirts on the city came into view. Buford frowned. "You'd think an evil scientist would have some tricked out lair."

"Do not judge a book by its cover," Baljeet warned. "It may not look so bad on the inside."

Agent Peter gave a squeak in agreement. He too had been fooled by the less-than-impressive exterior of the building. Had he ever gotten a surprise when he slipped in through the broken window and found a dozen laser guns pointed at him.

The hoverjet landed a few feet away from the building. The boys climbed out and activated the cloaking device on their bracelets. Baljeet cautiously approached the warehouse. "There are probably security cameras somewhere. We must be quiet and stealthy-"

"You're going down, evil creep!" Buford shouted and charged for the rusty door.

Baljeet winced as Buford knocked the door down and ran into the building. The bully soon started screaming in panic. "Oh, Buford."

Agent Peter cradled his head in his paws. Baljeet jogged after his friend and peered around the doorframe. He had been correct in his assumption that the interior of the lair would look nothing like the exterior. High-tech gadgets beeped and glinted. There was a shelf that was stocked with jars that had a questionable substance in them. A giant shark tank was set up against the wall.

And in the middle of the lair was Buford, trapped in a glass bubble.

Professor Dementia was short with wild grey hair. One eye was yellow and one eye was green and the former twitched ever so often. "Children are nasty creatures," he mumbled. "They are a useless, noisy life form. I hate when children trespass on my property. Do you know what I do to children?"

"You let them go?" Buford asked.

"That's right. I let them-no! I feed them to my little cuties."

Buford swallowed thickly when the man gestured towards his sharks. "They're...adorable."

Concerned, Baljeet started for the bully. Peter was quick to follow. The two crawled across the floor as the evil scientist paced in front of Buford. "You nearly messed with my plans. I was going to send an army of monkeys across the Tri-State Area and take it over during the chaos."

Baljeet froze and stared. Peter twirled a finger around his ear. He's crazy. None of his plans make any sense most of the time.

Buford seemed to realize this. "And how could me walking in here mess with your stupid monkey plan?"

"Don't play dumb with me. You know exactly how," Dementia snapped. "I have a plan to execute. It's time to feed my little babies!"

Peter sprang up and slammed into Dementia. Baljeet jumped up and raced over to the trapped Buford. "Get me out of here, Jeet!" Buford said frantically. "I can't breathe!"

"Just shatter the glass!" Baljeet said in exasperation. "Pretend it is my face and punch it."

The Indian child let out a yelp as a fist sailed in his direction. There was a sickening crunch as knuckles collided against glass and the bubble fell apart. Buford nursed his bloody knuckles and frowned. "Okay. Next time, we do it the panda's way."

"That is such a brilliant idea," Baljeet drawled sarcastically. "Why did I not think of that?"

"There's another one!" Dementia howled. "It's an infestation!"

Baljeet and Buford ducked to avoid the laser blast. Baljeet kicked the gun out of the man's hands and Buford caught it. "Hasta la vista," the bully growled and pointed the gun. Dementia threw his hands in the air.

Peter nailed him across the head and the evil scientist fell unconscious. Buford slammed the laser gun on the ground and stomped on it for good measure. "I guess we should free the monkeys."

Baljeet rubbed his forehead. "How do you deal with this lunatic every day?" he asked his animal partner.

Lots of coffee, Peter thought tiredly. Lots and lots of coffee.

...

Isabella and Agent Pinky got their daily briefing and took off to Professor Poofenplotz's lair. "Why would an evil scientist want to steal the Tri-State Area's supply of sunscreen?"

Pinky shrugged. He never really questioned why Poofenplotz did what she did. She never gave him backstories like Doofenshmirtz did to Perry. He did his job and that was that.

Isabella's eyes widened as the large, needle-like structure with the Saturn-style top came into view. "Wow. This is her evil lair?"

Pinky barked in confirmation and gestured towards her bracelet. Isabella quickly pressed the green button and braced herself for battle.

The dog stalled the hovercar and leapt at the window. It shattered from his powerful kick and Isabella quickly jumped through the jagged opening after her pet. She landed beside her dog and held up her fists, glaring at the skinny, white-haired woman before her.

"Pinky the Chihuahua," Professor Poofenplotz cooed. "How awful to see you. And who is this?"

"None of your business," Isabella snapped.

"I wasn't aware the O.W.C.A. hired humans now. No matter." She quickly flipped a switch and the two agents found themselves tied up in rope. "You little pests won't get in my way."

"What kind of maniac buys every bottle of sunscreen in the Tri-State Area?" Isabella asked as she struggled in her bindings.

"That would be me, dear. I know you're new, but pay attention. The cretins in the Tri-State Area have always been jealous of my beauty. Because of that they have forever been making fun of my pale complexion. But I shall give them theirs when every citizen finds themselves with a severe sunburn!

"Dry, peeling skin will force them to come to me for sunscreen which they will pay a hefty price for. With that money I will bribe the mayor out of office be ruler of the Tri-State Area and eventually the world! But first I have to use my Sun Ray to strengthen the intensity of the sun's rays!"

Isabella stared at the cackling woman. She slowly turned to look at Pinky. "Is she serious?"

Pinky nodded wearily.

"You know, when I pictured my first mission, it involved a villain more sinister and less vain."

Pinky smirked and glanced up. Poofenplotz was prepping the Sun Ray and mumbling to herself. He tilted his fedora down and Isabella watched in awe as blades popped out of the rim and sliced through the ropes. "Cool. When do I get a hat?"

Pinky broke free and cut through Isabella's ropes. Pinky tackled Poofenplotz and Isabella ran for the machine. She unplugged it and smashed the contraption to bits and pieces.

"You little brat!" Poofenplotz cried angrily. She landed a swift kick to Pinky and charged at Isabella. The Mexican-Jewish girl narrowed her eyes and launched into a spinning roundhouse kick. Poofenplotz went sailing into the crates of sunscreen.

Isabella put her hands on her hips. "That's Agent I to you, lady."

...

Ginger, Adyson and Gretchen followed Agent F through the skies. Adyson was having trouble navigating with a jetpack and narrowly avoided crashing into a billboard several times. Ginger let out a sigh of exasperation. "If you keep this up we'll never get to the bad guy's lair!"

"Sorry!" Adyson cried as she bumped into Gretchen. "I'm not used to travelling like this. Why are you guys so good?"

"We played jetpack volleyball with Phineas and Ferb that one day. Where were you?"

"At a dental appointment!" Adyson wailed.

Agent F let out a sigh and kept a close watch on the clumsy girl. Eventually they made it to domed evil lair of Dr. Bloodpudding and the girls disguised themselves.

"How are we supposed to get in?" Ginger asked.

Adyson let out a sudden scream and pitched past them. Her jetpack started smoking and she found herself crashing through the glass roof. Ginger and Gretchen cried out in panic and hurried after their friend. Agent F shook his head and quickly flew after the girls.

Ginger and Gretchen found Adyson sprawled on the red-tiled floor, surrounded by glass shards. "Are you okay?" Ginger asked in concern.

Adyson cautiously sat up. "I guess so."

"Intruders!"

The three Fireside Girls didn't have time to prepare themselves as a laser blast shot towards them. Agent F tackled them out of the way.

"Sorry," Gretchen said quickly. "Alright girls. Time to focus!"

Dr. Bloodpudding sneered at them. "Are these little girls your new partners, Agent F? Surely the O.W.C.A. isn't desperate enough to hire snot-nosed brats."

"Who you calling a snot-nosed brat?" Ginger asked angrily.

"They're not very smart either."

"That's it," Gretchen growled. "Listen buddy, are you gonna tell us your evil scheme or what?"

"Of course not! I don't sink to stereotypical villain behaviour," Dr. Bloodpudding said disdainfully.

Agent F nodded his head in confirmation. He always defeated his nemesis first and then found out what the plan was, just in case he needed to disassemble a machine or something.

Dr. Bloodpudding whipped a remote out of his pocket and pressed the button. The girls jumped to avoid the cages falling from the ceiling. Agent F was not so lucky. "Ginger, you free Agent F. Adyson, let's kick some butt!" Gretchen ordered.

While Adyson and Gretchen fought the evil scientist Ginger removed a hairpin from her raven locks. "I got my Lock-Picking patch a few months ago," she informed the frog as she freed him.

Agent F shook his head in amusement. Are their Fireside Girl patches for everything?

Ginger let out a startled shriek. Dr. Bloodpudding had grabbed her by the front of her shirt and he sent Gretchen sliding across the floor.

"Hey!" Adyson cried. Agent F went to Ginger's aid and Adyson went to see if Gretchen was alright.

"A little sore," the bespectacled girl groaned as she stood up. "But I should have seen the uppercut coming."

Agent F nailed Dr. Bloodpudding in the stomach and the man fell with a grunt. Ginger hit the ground and spotted the cage Adyson had recently opened. "In there!"

Agent F nodded and delivered a swift kick to his nemesis' backside. The man slid across the floor and into the cage. Adyson raced over and firmly shut the door. "Woo-hoo! We did it!"

"With minimal cuts and bruises," Ginger added.

"So what was your evil plan anyway?" Gretchen asked the trapped Dr. Bloodpudding.

"I was going to use that machine to eliminate the mayor of the Tri-State Area," Bloodpudding growled. "Then I was going to destroy his idiotic brother and swoop in and take over!"

Agent F went to work taking apart the machine with Adyson's help. Gretchen shook her head.

"The Tri-State Area is full of nut-jobs."

...

Phineas and Ferb excited the elevator with Perry in tow. "How come we didn't fly the hovercar up to the window?" Phineas asked.

Doofenshmirtz is getting tired of me crashing through his door and breaking his windows, Perry thought.

"We should start working on making some animal translators again," Phineas mused. "That way we can communicate with each other."

Ferb flashed a thumbs-up and Perry chattered in agreement. The agents approached Doofenshmirtz's door. As the evil doctor already knew who they were there was no point in using the disguise feature of their bracelets. But the other functions would come in handy.

Phineas opened the door and paused in the doorframe. "Er...what's up, Dr. D?"

The evil scientist was crouched in the middle of his lair surrounded by metal scraps and wires. A half-finished –Inator sat on the balcony. "I slept in," Heinz said sheepishly. "So we're gonna be a little behind schedule, boys. Perry the Platypus knows where the waiting area is so he can show you the way."

The two boys followed their pet platypus to a collection of chairs by a low-rise table stocked with stolen magazines. "I wonder if the others are having this kind of experience."

I doubt it, Perry thought dryly. There's only one Doctor Heinz Doofenshmirtz in the world.

Ferb flicked through a mechanics magazine and gestured towards a glossy page. Phineas leaned forwards and studied it. "Cool! We should totally do that on our day off."

"Whoa, whoa!" Heinz glanced up from his –Inator. "You can read Spanish?"

"Nah. We're just looking at the pictures."

Perry gave a pointed chatter. Heinz caught on and went back to work. The platypus didn't want the evil scientist to get too casual with his boys. There were some boundaries to their relationship.

"Done!" Heinz exclaimed.

Phineas gave a yelp of surprise as he was thrust from his chair and to the floor. "Hey! Why's the floor covered in super glue?"

Ferb tried to lift his leg but found it was firmly glued to the floor. Perry scowled. If my fur gets ripped off trying to get out of this Doof is going to be sorry!

Doofenshmirtz clapped his hands together. "No more delay! Now it is time to explain the genius that is my Seafood-Be-Gone-Inator!"

Perry rolled his eyes.

"When I was a little boy in Gimmelshtump there was this dinky old seafood place. You know, I should have realized that the place was shoddy when some of the fishes only had one eye-anyway, I had a nickel and I was hungry so I bought some fish. It was Gimmelshtump tradition to eat a fish raw to signify your manhood. I don't want to get too graphic with the details so let's just say I got the worst stomach bug in history and my family couldn't live in our home for about a week. And I couldn't change my clothes for a week...

"So to make myself feel better about that humiliating moment I'm gonna use my Seafood-Be-Gone-Inator to make all the seafood in the Tri-State Area to go bad! Everyone will be too sick to leave their houses-"

Or hospitals, Perry thought.

"-and I'll be able to waltz in and take over the Tri-State Area! And I'll be able to laugh at everyone!" Doofenshmirtz grinned gleefully.

Phineas and Ferb just stared. Perry couldn't really blame them. It had taken him a while to get used to Doofenshmirtz's odd (and often downright weird) schemes. He managed to activate the laser on his communicator and aimed it at the coating of glue on the floor.

Phineas brightened when he felt the glue starting to melt. He pulled himself free and tackled Doofenshmirtz to the ground.

"Oof!" Heinz swatted Phineas off his shoulders. "I don't think so, kid!"

Perry sent a punch to Heinz's stomach. Ferb calmly walked over to the –Inator and began to disassemble it.

"Wait, wait!" Heinz protested. "Three to one isn't fair! Norm! Get out here!"

The giant robot stumbled into the room. "How may I help you, Dad?"

"I'm not your father!" Heinz snapped and smacked Perry aside. Phineas frowned and sent a kick to his ankle. "Ouch! Norm, help me!"

Norm bent down and easily picked Phineas up. Perry froze and turned around.

"No, no!" Phineas said quickly. "I got this. Go give Ferb some time."

The evil doctor was making his way towards Ferb. "You know, I'm probably going to have this limp for a week."

Perry obeyed and Phineas glared at the robot. "Okay Norm. Put me down."

"Dad wants me to keep you detained."

"Not your father!"

Phineas glanced down and noticed Norm's front hatch. Curious, he managed to use his foot to open the hatch. A squirrel glanced up at him from his wheel. "Wait, you run on squirrel power?"

"Yes. Yes I do."

"Don't tell him that, Norm!" Heinz cried. Perry had located the bottle of super glue and was advancing upon him menacingly.

"Come on boy," Phineas cooed and managed to lure the squirrel out of its little 'home'. Norm powered down immediately and Phineas grinned in triumph. "Oh yeah! Agent Phineas for the win!"

After Perry gave Heinz a good dose of super glue and Ferb finished disassembling the –Inator the three headed home. "Are you sure he won't just rebuild the machine?" Phineas asked.

Perry gave a dismissive chatter. Not his style.

"Whatever you say, Boss."

...

"Why are we in a dump?"

Candace gingerly climbed over the mounds of trash. Sergei the Snail was perched on her shoulder. "This is so gross."

Stacy fiddled with her bracelet. "We better activate these things. You never know when we'll run into this Professor Glockworth fellow."

Candace pressed the button and struck a pose. "How do I look?"

"Great," Stacy drawled. The three agents peered over another massive garbage mound. "Geez! What is that?"

Sergei frowned. He had known that when Glockworth had made his headquarters in a junk yard that something wasn't right.

A large, hulking glass machine was pulsating light. Glockworth circled the machine, cackling loudly. Major Monogram had already warned them about Glockworth.

"He's not one you want to mess around with. Let Sergei deal with him. You two will always be in charge of destroying his inventions."

Sergei jumped off of Candace's shoulder and brought a startled Glockworth to the ground. Stacy and Candace stayed in their hiding spots. "Wow," Stacy breathed. "That snail can kick butt."

Candace frowned. "Well, how are we supposed to destroy that thing?"

The two girls managed to catch Glockworth shouting about how he would use his Solar-Eradicator to block out the sun and make it eternally dark so he could-

"Blah, blah blah." Candace scowled. "Do all these guys talk so much?"

"Isn't it standard of a villain to do so?" Stacy asked.

"Whatever. Hey, look! A baseball."

"So what?"

The redhead shrugged. "The stupid machine is made out of glass. What if we break it?"

"Is that smart?"

"You got any better ideas?"

Stacy shook her head. Candace wound up and tossed the baseball. The contraptions shattered into jagged pieces and started sparking.

Glockworth screamed in panic and fury. Stacy stumbled out of her hiding spot and grabbed the snail. She sent a swift kick to Glockworth and knocked him out. "Candace!" she shouted. "I don't think killing our nemesis on the first day is a good idea!"

Candace raced over and lugged the evil dude behind the garbage pile. They braced themselves.

The contraption exploded. A giant shockwave roared over the Tri-State Area. Candace swallowed and slowly glanced up. "The good news is the sun is still there," she said feebly.

Sergei glared at her.

The shockwave had knocked out the power in the entire Tri-State Area.

...

Phineas and Ferb returned to a dark house while Candace and Stacy stayed behind. A half-hour later Candace emerged from the tree hatch with a furious Perry right behind her. Phineas frowned in concern. "What happened?"

Candace explained how she and Stacy defeated their nemesis. Perry brandished a small metal device and Phineas leaned in closely. "What's that?"

"O.W.C.A. Animal Translator," Candace said nervously.

Perry attached it to his fur and took a deep breath. Phineas and Ferb leaned forwards in anticipation while Candace recoiled slightly.

"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND, CANDACE FLYNN?!"