AN: I hope everyone had a nice festive season, and a good 2013 so far.

I've got a few things in the works right now, including another chapter of If Three's a Crowd, as well as a crack story called No Such Thing as an Ordinary Day, about Parvati Patil's weirdest day ever. (It will use the characterizations from this story and the others of the same 'universe'.) I also have a small collection of very short oneshots titled Paternity, about how the women of Harry Potter told the men of their impending fatherhood...and the men's reactions.

'Ugh!'

Michael pulled a face.

Padma shook her head.

'What is it this time, Mike?'

The boy in question was now frantically trying to clean his tongue.

'Soap and tripe, I think. Tastes funny.'

'Mike, not only do you insist on eating the more exotic-looking Every Flavour Beans, you also insist on eating them two at a time. You are obviously going to end up with some unpleasant and unusual flavours.'

Michael glared at Terry.

'One day, Terry, I'm going to chance upon a combination that tastes so amazingly wonderful that it'll all be worth it.'

'And then you're going to spend the rest of your life attempting to chance upon it again.'

Michael pouted and popped another two Beans in his mouth.

Anthony swallowed his mouthful of Liquorice Wand, turning to his friend.

'Terry's right, you know.'

Michael's only reply was to swallow and make a face.

Terry simply raised an eyebrow, while Padma looked at Michael worriedly.

'Sardines and marmalade. I think. Tastes like sugared fish.'

'Mike, if you keep going, you might well be sick!'

He held up another two Beans.

'Come on, Pad, live a little! A risk with every mouthful! It's fun.'

'It doesn't sound very enjoyable to me, Mike.'

The Ravenclaw girl bit into her chocolate bar.

'But Pad, you only bought chocolate! That's boring! Why don't you try anything else?'

'I don't really like sweets, apart from chocolate, Mike.'

'Besides, she doesn't have to purchase some of nearly everything in the shop like you two. You're both completely broke.'

Michael and Anthony shook their heads.

'But-but Terry, it's Honeydukes! How can you not buy everything?'

'I can't believe it. Really, Pad, how can you not like all sweets? I mean, for once, even Tony agrees with me!'

The blond boy nodded and opened his Honeydukes bag, withdrawing a Fizzing Whizzbee.

'Here, have one, Pad! They're very nice.'

She declined, placing it back in his hand.

'No thank you, Tony. Vati gave me one once, and I didn't really like it.'

'Pad, you can't go to Honeydukes and only buy chocolate!'

'Why not, Mike?'

'You- you just can't! I mean, there's Sugar Quills, and Pepper Imps, and Ice Mice, and Jelly Slugs, and Drooble's, and Exploding Bonbons-'

'-And also Acid Pops, Cockroach Cluster and Blood-flavoured Lollipops. Mike, not everything in Honeydukes is something to rave about. After all, I doubt you'd enjoy an Acid Pop.'

Anthony swallowed his last bite of Liquorice Wand.

'Terry's got a point, Mike.'

Michael huffed.

'He's the one who only purchased peppermint-flavoured sweets. Tooth-flossing Stringmints indeed.'

Terry shrugged.

'I like the taste.'

'Next time, I'm getting an Acid Pop. Anyone care to join me?'

'Mike, you can't do that! You'll burn a hole in your tongue!'

'You only live once, Pad! I'm going to try it.'

Anthony groaned.

'You're on your own, Mike. I'm not trying one of those.'

'Terry? Please? For the sake of, I don't know, intellectual experimentation?'

Terry just looked at Michael, an eyebrow raised.

Michael's shoulders slumped.

'You're all boring.'

'No we're not!'

'No, you're boring, Tony.'

'We are not boring!'

'Are so!'

'Are not!'

'Are so!'

Terry and Padma shared a glance.

'I don't think they should be allowed so much sugar, Terry...'

Her fellow Ravenclaw nodded.

Sugar appeared to have strange effects on their friends.

'We must keep that in mind next time, Pad. Mike, Tony, how about going to The Three Broomsticks for some Butterbeer?'

'That sounds great, Terry. Let's go!'

'But I want to go to Zonko's!'

'The Three Broomsticks!'

'Zonko's!'

'Butterbeer!

'Nose-biting teacups!'

Michael and Anthony continued to glare at each other.

'Pad, next time, I think we should save Honeydukes for last.'

The Ravenclaw girl nodded wearily.

'Definitely. Chocolate, Terry?'

He accepted.

'I'm not normally fond of chocolate, but I think I need some. And not just because of the Dementors.'

'Are so!'

'Are not!'

'Are so!'