Chapter Six – Fear No Evil

They said time is the fire in which men burn. They said time was a predator, every second a step closer to its prey. They said time was the teacher, who eventually killed all its pupils.

They said time healed all wounds.

Remus Lupin knew it was all these things and more. Time was a surgeon's scalpel capable of great healing but also of inflicting the most grievous of wounds. Time was the greatest counsellor, but no counsellor worth his or her salt told people what they wanted to hear all the time.

Time was a contradiction. It was perhaps the only commodity it was possible to have too much and too little of at once.

That had certainly been the case for Remus since December. Time had shown its true elastic nature in the last two months. The first few weeks had been a frantic scramble; trying to get himself together, get his affairs in order while at the same time chase down any leads as to where Sirius might be, or might be headed. He'd gone to places in those first couple of weeks he had never dreamed of going, talked to people he'd spent his entire life avoiding, and in the end it had been for nothing. No-one had had any more information for him than could be gleaned from the Prophet.

So he'd come to Hogwarts, a small voice in his head praying all the while that he was wrong. That Sirius would not have come here, that he would simply flee. Because for Sirius to come here meant his depravity had reached depths even beyond that which they had already seen. Treacherous and murderous, that much he already knew. Liar, betrayer, deceiver, killer. But to come here meant he would stoop even lower. Meant he would not be satisfied until he had completed what he had started eleven years ago. He would not be satisfied until both Peter and Harry were dead. To go after a child, any child, was just...

Remus had no words to describe anyone who could deliberately, purposefully and remorselessly take the life of a child. The very notion of it offended him to the very core of his being, went against something so fundamental in his soul it stirred the wolf's rage to almost uncontrollable levels.

As much as it had sickened him, he'd been forced to cling to that rage. It was all there was to sustain him. Keep him going when; as the weeks passed his progress had slowed to nothing and time had seemed to fly past and yet all the while drag unbearably. Getting in and out of the castle had proved not impossible but challenging to say the least. It had all seemed so much simpler fifteen years ago. Dumbledore had clearly increased security, and although Remus was aware of numerous tunnels and passages between Hogsmeade and Hogwarts, getting to them without being spotted had proved incredibly difficult.

It hadn't taken him long to work out that Sirius was already at the school. In the days running up to his first full moon since arriving at Hogwarts, when his wolf senses were at their sharpest, Sirius' scent had filled the passageways that riddled the castle. That knowledge had only spurred him on, made him more determined. But all the determination in the world could not delay the moon.

He'd known he wouldn't catch up with Sirius quickly, but for some reason he hadn't thought he would still be at the school when the moon came. He hadn't been prepared. He'd had to find somewhere to go. Somewhere he could keep the people of Hogsmeade safe from the beast within.

An abandoned cottage on the edge of the Dark Forest, (better known to most as the Forbidden Forest) had proved a lucky find. The cottage itself was deeply decayed, uninhabitable, but the stone cellar had been sound; well sound enough for his purposes. A few hours spent using timbers salvaged from the rotting dwelling above had shored up the hatch. A well practiced hand had set the wards from the inside and what few possessions he had he'd shrunk and tucked safely behind a loose stone high up in one of the walls.

All he'd been able to do was sit in the dark and wait for it to come, knowing how the wolf would chafe at the tiny unfamiliar space and that without the Muggle chemicals he'd taken to using in recent years the wolf would be mobile, agitated and furious before it even realised it was confined. Knowing before the sun had even set that the pain of transformation would be nothing compared to what he would wake to, and that his recovery would be long; wasting precious valuable time he should be in pursuit of Sirius.

He hadn't been wrong. It had been the worst moon he could remember in a very long time. He'd lain on the cold cellar floor for days, unable to move through agony in his body. Not for the first time he'd longed for the days when he would meet the morning after the full moon with the comforting healing touch of Madame Pomfry, or later in time, the soothing whispers and the gentle ministrations of the lover he could not now even mourn.

Worst of all though, had been the time it had allowed him. Time he would rather have spent lost in rage and single minded pursuit. Trapped, his waking moments had been filled with thought and thinking had proved dangerous. Idle musing had passed through his mind, ideas that pricked and pulled at him.

He'd tried to push them away, but even as he focussed on healing himself, on escaping his self imposed prison, on working out new ways to complete his mission they'd nagged at him. They'd nagged at him all the way back to London on the Knight bus, clawing their way through his worries, fears and the constant whining consciousness that the money he was spending should have been for his potion. They nagged at him as he'd spent time trying to shadow Snape, looking for a way to steal a strand of the man's hair to use for the polyjuice potion he'd spent a ridiculous amount of money on. They'd nagged at him even as he'd left Peter, having just sworn once again to take Sirius Black's life, and protect Peter and Harry with his own life if necessary.

In fact they nagged at him more then. After hearing Peter's story. Doubts. Questions. Confusion. As the days ticked by his confusion only grew. He knew Sirius was in the castle. Knew in all likelihood Sirius rarely left it and could move around practically unhindered day or night, and yet both Harry and Peter were not only alive, but fairly unaware of Sirius' presence. Hell, Harry didn't seem to have any idea at all. This wasn't surprising because the areas of the castle that Remus had picked up Sirius' scent most strongly, led him to believe it was Peter, not Harry, Sirius was hunting.

But why hadn't he struck? What was he doing? The thought occurred to Remus that Sirius wanted Peter alone, but twelve dead Muggles, and at least twice that many injured or needing obliviating were proof enough of Sirius' disregard for bystanders and witnesses. It didn't make sense.

And it wasn't the only thing that didn't make sense. He'd known the story Peter had fed Dumbledore and the press was baloney from the start, but he understood why Peter had been forced to lie and yet the 'truth' still held an odd ring to it. He couldn't put his finger on it. Peter had no cause to lie to him, and his story did make sense, but...

Like weevils the doubts burrowed deep into his consciousness, distracting him when he needed focus. Delaying when so much time had already been wasted.

Time ticked on. He watched more than he acted, and berated himself daily for it. Still Sirius failed to make his move, and although Remus was of course relieved, he was also frustrated. Confused. The doubts were playing havoc with his resolve.

The first moon became the second. He'd been prepared for it this time. He'd woken not to the pain of broken bones and torn flesh, but to his own vomit, continued nausea and a lasting lethargy of body and mind. Oh the ignorance of those who considered Muggles inferior; their lack of magic had only given them cause to find more ingenious ways to achieve that which wizards could accomplish with a flick of a wand, and sometimes achieve things wizards had not a hope of achieving. No wizard had ever stepped foot on the moon for example, and while it had taken centuries for wizards to find a mixture that would defeat a werewolf's natural resistance to magical potions, Muggles had had chemicals that could render a werewolf utterly senseless for decades or even centuries.

The only real problem with the chemical route, were the side effects. Even now, two days on, Remus could feel the woolliness at the edges of his mind, the heaviness in his step. Normally it wouldn't matter, stacking shelves hardly required any real mental or physical exertion. But he was not back at the supermarket; he was trying to track a known mass murderer through the rabbit warren of tunnels within Hogwarts Castle.

It was clear Sirius knew he was being tracked now too. He'd taken to hunting Black by night, making it easier to move around, but night after night he would come unstuck. The trail would lead him into a tunnel or passage he couldn't get down, or would vanish altogether; a stark reminder that James had known and Sirius still knew these tunnels far better than he or Peter ever had.

Peter. A stroke of luck had given Peter three days of grace a week; he now spent three days a week at St Mungos. Unfortunately after ascertaining that Sirius didn't follow Peter down south, Remus realised he'd lost the one clue of predictability he'd had.

It was frustrating. The endless nightly searches for a moving target. More than once he'd made his way to the highest passageways, only to glance out of a window to see Sirius trotting across the moonlit grounds. Searching the Forbidden Forest was a hopeless endeavour, one which he had given up on after a week of aimless wandering. Wherever he went, Sirius was not.

Or if he was in sight, then he would do something so utterly confusing and dumbfounding that Remus would be struck motionless with confusion. Those niggling, nagging doubts would creep in to weaken his resolve again, and by the time he would pull himself together, Black would be gone.

He had to be stronger than that. He'd resolved, as he'd waited for this last moon, to not let himself be swayed. He would do as he'd promised. He would not fail. He would be stronger than this.

It all came back to one simple truth. One simple undeniable fact that all the odd behaviour and doubts in the world could not overcome. Sirius had been Secret Keeper. It was his new mantra, one he repeated to himself, a whisper under his breath as he picked his way through the rubble and centuries of filth and dust in the fourth floor passageways.

"...He's a murderer. He killed James. He Killed Lily. He Killed those Muggles. He'll Kill Harry. He'll Kill Peter. He's a murderer. He killed James. He Killed Lily. He Killed those Muggles. He'll Kill Harry. He'll Kill Peter. He's a murderer. He killed James..."

It was so dark in the tunnel, even his better than human night vision was failing him. One hand braced against the tunnel wall, he was practically feeling his way. He'd never liked this tunnel, although it was one he'd used most often. It led from the hidden stair behind the south wall of the main staircase to the corridor just outside the library. There was a smaller side tunnel just up ahead that led into the back of the library itself; as a student he'd used this particular tunnel to sneak into the restricted section of the library on numerous occasions. He couldn't use his wand to cast a lumos charm, he needed both hands to help him balance as he tried to navigate the uneven and often unstable floor.

Something wobbled and gave way under his foot. A fallen stone. Stumbling, Remus' shoulder thumped hard against the wall of the passageway as he braced himself against a fall, his ankle momentarily screaming at the odd angle it was forced into until he could retrieve it. He hissed, straightening up and gingerly testing his weight on his foot. His ankle smarted but it wasn't sprained, only twisted. The pain would pass.

It wasn't like he was in any rush right now. He'd grown impatient and snuck into the school earlier than usual tonight, picking up his search where he'd left off the night before. But soon he would reach a dead-end. Or at least a point where he would have to venture out of the tunnels and into a corridor to continue, and given the hour there was too much of a risk of being spotted for now.

He supposed he could stop where he was. He had planned to stop a bit further on, or maybe sneak into the back of the library, but here was a good a place as any. Feeling his way, Remus lowered himself to the ground and stretched his legs out as best he could, taking the weight off his sore ankle.

He was hungry, tired and cold through to the bone despite the warmth of the castle. The cellar of the abandoned cottage kept the rain, snow and wind out, but it couldn't keep away the cold, or the pervasive damp. Every piece of clothing he had, every blanket seemed wet to the touch now, no matter how many drying charms he used. He longed for a hot bath and a good meal. Even one of those Muggle premade meals that were heated in a 'microwave' (and weren't they fascinating inventions in and of themselves) would do him right now, even if they did taste strangely chemical. Smelling the aromas drifting from the Great Hall during meal times over the last couple of months had been nothing short of torture.

Oh yes he remembered Hogwarts food. It was funny, but he'd never eaten as well as he had when he was at school. Huge roasts, and piles of mashed potatoes. Full cooked breakfasts. Cakes and sticky buns. Steaming thick stews with great lumps of meat so tender they just melted in the mouth, and vegetables so soft yet flavoursome even the most diehard teenage carnivore would fight his own brother for the last piece of swede. Curry on a Tuesday, with piles of fluffy white rice, and soft flat bread filled with sultanas and coconut. Fish and Chips on Friday. Huge pieces of cod, haddock or plaice coated in rich, crispy batter with chips as fat as a carpenters thumb; Ketchup and brown-sauce, (Tartar sauce for the more refined diners) and about a gallon of vinegar. Great bowls of thick sticky porridge with cream and honey. Rice-pudding, and hot apple pie. Chocolate Mousse so divine with every spoon the room would be trying not to make orgasmic sounds of bliss.

Then there were custard tarts, and cherry trifles, and chocolate cake, and those pastry slices filled with gooey chocolate sauce that he never could remember the name of and had never found anywhere else and profiteroles and...

Remus hadn't even been aware he'd lost himself in a daydream of chocolate based deserts until he was startled from it by the sound of voices from the other side of the panels that separated the passageway from the corridor beyond.

"Now stay behind me, and I'll check around the corner."

"If you tilt the mirror a little more..."

Remus hadn't recognised the first voice, but the second one seemed familiar. He'd spent a fair amount of time shadowing Harry through the halls and he was pretty sure that the voice belonged to one of his friends.

"I know what I'm doing Granger. Just stay back would you?"

"Sorry."

Granger... Hermione. That was her name wasn't it? She, Harry and Harry's other friend... Molly Prewitt, now Weasley's, boy... Ron, that was it. She, Harry and Ron Weasley seemed somewhat inseparable, although they'd had some kind of falling out recently. Whatever had happened had apparently calmed down and Remus was glad. He was glad Harry had good friends – he of all people knew just how precious good friends were, and just how much they could make even the most horrible and painful of circumstances so much easier to deal with.

Feeling guilty for spying, Remus was about to get to his feet and continue his slow trek down the tunnel, when the world beyond the panels seemed to go mad. There was a crash, a yelp, a sound like a solid stone statue hitting a stone floor but not hard enough to break, a growl and an all mighty scream.

The tunnel exit was some distance away and a difficult scramble. The girls were just on the other side of the panels. Scrambling to his feet, ignoring the pain in his ankle, Remus threw his pitiful bulk against the fake wall. There was a muted thud and his hair filled with dust and dirt. The panel didn't move.

Right, new tactic required. Bracing against the solid stone wall behind him, Remus brought up first one foot, then the other. Legs bent he closed his eyes and using strength few would realise he had in his thin frame, he pushed.

Sweat trickled down his brow with the effort, but he could feel the panel giving. With all his strength he pushed, and with a final ominous creak the panel gave, tumbling him out into the hallway beyond and into the middle of a scene from one of his nightmares.

Blood on the floor.

A huge black dog standing over the body of a girl, another lying close by.

A Familiar black dog.

He was on his feet and his wand was in hand before he could fully take in the picture. Caught, the dog looked up and snarled.

"Stupif..."

Too late. The dog leapt. Crashing into him, bodily knocking him to the floor and bounding off. Momentarily winded, Remus cursed, let out a growl of his own and rolling onto his belly scrambled back to his feet and gave chase.

The dog had a good head start on him, but he had at least one advantage.

"Reducto!" With a flick of his wand the section of stone above the tunnel the dog was about to run into exploded into a shower of fragments, the hallways filling with dust as the Dog yelped, losing its footing momentarily before taking off again, this time at a considerably slower pace given it was favouring one its front legs.

Good. That evened things up a little. While the Dog had been halted and now slowed, Remus had kept running, closing the gap between them. He almost crowed with delight when he realised where the dog was headed. Oh Sirius might know the whole school better than most, but no-one knew the fourth floor like he did.

Left at the end of the hall, right past the one legged knight, on past the tapestry of Twitching Herbert the Irritated and then...

Skidding into the disused classroom a mere few paces behind the animal, Remus flicked his wand with pin point accuracy, sending all the old desks and chairs sliding across the floor to pile up over the grate in the floor in the far corner. The Dog barely managed to dodge the wall of incoming wood before it turned back to Remus growling fiercely, hackles raised.

Standing his ground, Remus held his wand before him with such a steady hand he even impressed himself.

"At least have dignity to face me like a man."

The animal before him blurred then stretched, but Remus didn't look away. His eyes were hard when he took in the face of Sirius Black, in the flesh for the first time in eleven years. Straggly unwashed hair hanging around his shoulders, matching the beard on his chin. Filth ground into every pour. Prison uniform in rags, covered by a long brown overcoat that was ripped and mud splattered.

But underneath the muck and torn clothing, behind the dark shadows and signs of age and a harsh existence there were hints of the boy that once was, and the man Remus remembered. The same regal features, the same dusky-grey eyes; haunted but just as piercing as they ever were. A thousand images skipped through Remus' mind; memories of those eyes dancing with mischief, that face alight with joy and laughter, those lips softened into a smile no-one ever saw but him.

'...He's a murderer. He killed James. He Killed Lily. He Killed those Muggles. He killed them and laughed. He betrayed you. He betrayed us all. He'll kill Harry. He'll kill Peter. He's a murderer. He's a murderer. He's a murderer...'

Remus' hand tightened reflexively around his wand, knuckles white. When his words came they dripped with condescension; a sneering mocking drawl. "Well well Sirius, looking kind of ragged aren't we? Finally, the flesh reflects the madness within."

"And you'd know all about the madness within wouldn't you Remus?" Sirius Black threw back. There was scornful amusement in his tone, even as his eyes darted around the room for a moment before settling back on the tawny haired werewolf. Subtly, he took a sidestep, and then another. Subtle, but Remus caught it nonetheless and mirrored his movement. Keeping him in sight, keeping the gap between them.

"You shouldn't have come here Sirius. You should have run while you had the chance." The words were spoken without any real thought, but as soon as they were said, Remus knew he'd meant them.

Why Sirius? Why didn't you run? Why did you bring us to this?

"Now where would the fun be in that?" Sirius replied glibly, taking another careful step. Edging round. Edging round so that...

"COLLOPORTUS DURO!*"

Sirius flinched and ducked as Remus flicked his wand, moving before the words had barely formed on Remus' lips, but the spell wasn't meant for him. The heavy wooden classroom door slammed shut with a sound that was an odd mixture of a squelch and grating of stone against stone.

With a quick glance over his shoulder, Sirius straightened and rounded on Remus once more, his expression grim yet strangely wild. "Brilliant! Now you've got us both locked in here what's the plan? Are you going to kill me Remus?" He laughed, a manic and mocking sound. "Well? Come on then! I'm right he-yah! I'm clearly not going anywhere," He spread his arms out wide. "And as you can see I'm completely unarmed! If you think you can do it, Go Ahead! Come on Remus take a shot!"

He was just stood there. Arms outstretched, even his fingers were spread, palms forward; like a man crucified without a cross. The words were there, the spell on the tip of Remus' tongue.

Sirius didn't miss his hesitation. "What are you waiting for!? This is what you wanted wasn't it!? This is why you've chased me around this bloody castle for months isn't it?! Well come on then! Do it! One little spell and it's all over with! One little unforgivable! No one need ever know! It's not like I'd be able to tell them. Dead men tell no tales! So, come on. Let's do this!" He crowed, goading merrily, then in a flash the manic almost hysterical glee was gone, replaced by a cruel twist of lips and narrowed eyes that were harbingers of his legendary talent for derisive verbal torment, "Or maybe haven't you got the stomach for it? Is that it? The high and mighty Remus John Lupin. The conscience of the Marauders. The ethical and moral stalwart. The world's first vegetarian werewolf. HA!" A bark of sardonic laughter, "Oh you could ever talk big, but never were much for the follow through. Mr Goody-Twom-shoes with his shiny prefect badge. Never one to get into trouble. Never one to rock the boat or cross the line. Always in the background, letting your friends carry the can, and in the meantime sticking your tongue so far up the professors arses you could taste the back of their teeth! OH Yes Sir! Please Sir! I'm so grateful to be let into school Sir! Oh Please let me lick your arse Sir!" Sirius sing-songed in a grating falsetto, "You haven't even got it in you to cast one small unforgivable to avenge your friends! You always were spineless Lupin..."

"Decido Modax!**" Remus hissed, his wand lashing out like a broad swipe of a blade.

This time, when Sirius instinctively brought his wand arm up to defend himself despite not having a wand to deflect the curse, the pungent mixed aroma of burnt flesh and blood filled the air. Letting out a cry of pain, Sirius clutched at his wounded limb even as the force of the spell knocked him off his feet. Without really being fully aware that he'd done it, Remus shot forward to loom over the prone figure, his breath coming in angry pants. Anger both at Sirius' words, and also at himself, for letting the cruel barbs get to him.

Reaching down he grabbed a fistful of Sirius' shirtfront and his wand jabbed cruelly into the side of the escapee's neck. "A lot can change in eleven years, Black. And I don't need an unforgivable to kill you. There are a lot more decorative and painful ways to end your sorry excuse for an existence from this range. Like setting your head on fire..."

For the first time since their encounter began, Sirius' eyes lost their manic gleam and flickered with genuine fear. His voice, far calmer than it had been before, held a strained raspy quality. "If you kill me Remus, you'll never know the truth."

"I know the truth." Remus hissed back. His tone was strong, but even as he spoke, the voice in his head that had so plagued him these last weeks rattled at the bars of the cage into which he'd tried to force it.

"Do you? Or is it that you only think you do?" Sirius challenged quietly, never taking his eyes from the werewolf's. "Tell me then Remus." He began slowly. "If you know the truth. If you truly believe it. Why did you never tell anyone I was an animagus when you knew Dark Creatures barely even registered the presence of animals most of the time?"

"I..." Remus began, then faltered. Why? Why hadn't he? Why had he never said a word to anyone? Dark Creatures. He remembered the conversation, vaguely. It was so many years ago. Third year? Fourth year? He'd been talking about werewolves, but they weren't the only Dark Creatures. Dementors. Dementors ignored animals even more than werewolves did. He knew that. He knew and he'd never said a word.

"Dog got your tongue?" Sirius bated him, dark amusement lacing his words.

Remus blinked then reared back in disgust, throwing Sirius back to the floor and taking a good few steps away as he was overwhelmed with memory. Sirius used to say that to him all the time. Whenever they'd kissed and he'd get a bit befuddled, Sirius would smile smugly and... Stop it! It was just wrong. Those words from this creature before him.

Sitting up whilst still cradling his arm, Sirius pressed his advantage."Well? I'm waiting. Come on Remus. You must have had a reason. Why didn't you say anything hmm? Why keep them in the dark. Why protect me..."

"I was protecting James and Peter!" Remus growled furiously cutting Sirius off as he paced away. How dare he!? How dare Sirius presume to assign that kind of motive to him! And yet why had he...

"They were dead!" Sirius persisted vehemently, struggling to his feet. "I hardly think the Registry would come chasing after their rotting corpses! Think Remus!"

"I had to protect their reputations! Their memories!" Remus found himself justifying. Scrambling for an answer. Not to satisfy Sirius, but himself. Why? Why? If he'd told, if he'd said something Sirius would still be where he belonged, in Azkaban! Why didn't he say something! Why had he not even thought about it? Why?

Sirius barked a laugh. "Arse Gravy! That's loose stool water and you know it! You never told because you knew deep down that something wasn't right about what you were being told! Because you knew I would never willingly put James, Lily or Harry in danger!"

Pure contradiction between known fact and Sirius' words had broken Remus from his spiral and he rounded on the dark haired man in renewed anger, tinged with desperation. Inside the hurt was back. That biting, ripping agony that had come the first time he'd set eyes on the destroyed cottage in Godric's Hollow was back, and it bled into every fibre of his being, into the shaking of his wand hand and into the tremor of his voice. But he couldn't show Sirius' that hurt. He wouldn't give him that satisfaction. The growl that rose from his throat was more wolf than man, as he halted his pacing to aim his wand back onto Sirius. "And yet YOU sold them out.

"No."

"Your brother. Your godson." Remus continued, approaching Sirius one step at a time, tensed and coiled like a spring. Prowling, stalking like the predator he was, wand held before him ready to cast. "They trusted you. We all trusted you to keep them safe and you handed them over to Voldermort like a neatly wrapped birthday gift."

"No." Sirius countered again, although he stood his ground this time and did not step back.

"You betrayed everything and everyone who ever mattered to us."

"NO!" Sirius yelled. "I would have died! I would have died to protect them!"

"And yet you're still standing here." Remus threw back with a sneer, continuing his advance. "While James and Lily rot in their graves, Peter is half mad, and Harry has a permanent reminder of your betrayal etched into his forehead."

"I never betrayed them!" Sirius spat.

"Lies!" Remus spat back his voice climbing from its previous quiet seething accusation. "You betrayed James and Lily to Voldermort, and when Peter tracked you down, you tried to kill him! Only you failed! Peter transformed into a rat and was knocked out by the explosion!"

"If Peter was so innocent explain the finger!"Demanding, challenging, defiant. Sirius stood his ground; matched Remus' tone and took it one louder. "Explain why they only found a finger!"

"HE LOST IT WHEN YOU BLEW HIM UP ALONG WITH A STREET FULL OF MUGGLES!"Remus countered forcefully.

But Sirius wasn't done. "HE DIDN'T LOSE IT! THE DIRTY COWARD CUT IT OFF, THEN TRANSFORMED INTO A RAT JUST AS HE BLEW UP THE STREET SO THAT EVERYONE WOULD THINK HE WAS DEAD! THAT'S WHY HE NEVER CAME BACK!"

"HE DIDN'T COME BACK BECAUSE HE COULDN'T! HE LOST HIS WAND WHEN HE LOST HIS FINGER!"

"WE DON'T NEED WANDS TO TRANSFORM! HE NEVER CAME BACK BECAUSE THE FILTHY WRETCH WAS LIVING THE HIGH-LIFE WITH THE WEASLEYS! WARM SAFE PLACE TO LIVE, ALL THE FOOD HE COULD EAT. HE HAD IT MADE! PAMPERED PET OF A PUREBLOOD FAMILY!"

It was like he was inside Remus' head, reading his mind, reading his doubts. Laying them all bare to exposure and light. Every incongruity in Peter's story, Sirius had an explanation for. No matter what Remus said, he took the world and turned it on its head and inside out and yet by doing so he made it make sense. An awful vile tasting kind of sense. All apart from one key fact that destroyed all Sirius' reasoning.

"ENOUGH! Enough Lies!" Remus finally cried out in desperation. "YOU were their SECRET KEEPER! NOT PETER! YOU! Dumbledore confirmed it!"

"WE NEVER TOLD DUMBLEDORE! He assumed and we let him! Only James, Lily, Peter and I knew the truth and we wanted it that way! Use your head Remus! You remember what it was like then! Everything we did, everywhere we went, the Death-Eaters were always one step ahead! We knew we'd been betrayed and we knew I would be obvious choice for Secret Keeper so we let you think..."

Sirius was still talking, but Remus wasn't really listening. The ill fitting pieces of the puzzle had been replaced and now everything was falling into a place to form the most horrifying picture. The nagging voice had broken its restraints and now screamed and berated him for his blindness, his stubbornness. The part of him that had never wanted to believe the boy he had known, the boy he had loved was capable of such evil wept in silent relief. Shame and horror, regret and fear clamoured for attention but through it all one voice cut. Sirius' voice; not the words he spoke now, but the ones he's uttered just moments ago.

"...Let me think?..." Whatever Sirius had been saying fell to silence as Remus' hushed repetition seemed to echo around the room; stopping everything into an icy silent moment. Looking up and meeting Sirius' eyes, truly meeting his eyes, Remus spoke the only thought that really filled his mind. "You, James and Lily all thought I was the spy?"

He didn't know which one of the three thinking he would turn on them hurt most.

"What was I supposed to think!?" Sirius bit out in exasperation. "All those disappearances! Days, even weeks at a time? Coming back bruised and bloody, and all you'd ever say was that you couldn't tell me? Then one day I get home and all your stuff is gone! No note. Not a word. You just moved out and left me!"

"I thought you were having an affair! I thought you were leaving me so I got out first!" The words escaped of their own volition; angry and hurt. He'd long ago accepted that Sirius hadn't had an affair, but he'd known that because he'd believed something much worse. Now everything was jumbled and the memory of those lonely nights and of that one night when he'd finally had enough gnawed at him. He opened his mouth to speak again, but then he saw Sirius' face.

"What!? I'd never have... where did...?" Sirius had stood firm under accusations of murder, deceit and betrayal, but now stared owlishly at Remus, stumbling over his words in incomprehension.

It was almost comical, but Remus didn't feel like laughing. He wanted to apologise, to say he knew it wasn't true now but his own wounds held him back, igniting a defensive waspish retort. "I wasn't the only one who disappeared a lot!"

"I was working! I was a junior Auror in the middle of a bloody war! I didn't exactly have set hours!" Sirius threw his arms out in disbelief, shaking his head. "You knew that!"

He had known. Auror training in the middle of a war seemed to have involved three weeks of classroom study then throwing the trainees in at the deep-end. He'd spent months wondering around the headquarters of the Order of the Pheonix or haunting their apartment chewing his nails to nothing as he waited for Sirius to come home. He'd spent many a night sitting up with a pregnant Lily Potter, trying to ease her worries and frustrations while trying to ignore his own. Then things had changed and he'd started to say almost the very same words to himself that Sirius had just said, over and over as he watched the door, trying not to think about what... and with another almost audible 'thunk' another nail was driven into the coffin. Another piece of the puzzle dropped effortlessly into place. Trying not to think about what... "...Peter told me."

"Peter Pettigrew. Why am I not surprised." Sirius scoffed with amusement as dark and bitter as the purest cooking chocolate. "Once again it all comes back to Peter. You know something? I didn't start thinking of you as possibly being the spy until two things happened. You started to pull away from me, and Peter told me how much time you spent hanging around headquarters, without any real reason. Funny that? James actually hit me when I told him you know. He actually hit me! Said it was my wounded pride talking." Looking down, Sirius sighed, "I should have listened."

"He played us against each other." Remus said mostly to himself. His mind working through everything he knew and he found himself slightly impressed. The kind of planning and forethought that had to gone into everything Peter had done was far beyond that which any of them would have guessed him capable of. Which was why it worked he supposed, and why no-one had worked it out. Who would have suspected poor little dim witted Peter Pettigrew of this? "He couldn't make me think you were a spy, he knew I'd be able to smell the death on you if you'd joined him, but he knew me too well. He played on my worst fear."

"And on mine." Sirius agreed sadly. At the flash of hurt in Remus' eyes, Sirius explained. "Voldermort offered you something I could never give you. Of course I was scared! He offered you equality! He offered you the chance to take control of the change! He offered you power, and money and employment and purpose! He offered you everything you'd always been denied! Scared? I was terrified! Because I knew if you did go over I wouldn't blame you! I might have had to kill you but I wouldn't have blamed you!"

"What kind of an idiot did you take me for?" Remus practically cried out in disbelief. "Even the werewolves that sided with him knew it was all lies! They only joined him to get back at everyone else! Oh now who needs to use their head Sirius?! Werewolves! They joined him in droves! That's where Dumbledore sent me! To try and stop the tide! Only explaining it was all lies was pointless because they already knew it! Reasonable arguments don't tend to work very well against those dead set on revenge."

"I don't know. I thought I did rather well just now."

"Down there Sir! There was shouting. I don't think it was students."

"Show me."

"Shit!" Remus swore gaining himself a raised eyebrow from Sirius. There were voices in the corridor, approaching fast. Of course they would have been heard; they hadn't exactly been minding their volume. The voices were dangerously close, and although the door was sealed tighter than a standard locking spell, it wouldn't take all that much for a fully trained wizard to break through.

"Go and get the Headmaster."

This time the voices were close enough that even Sirius heard. "Was that..."

"Snape." Remus growled. He was trapped. In a room with Sirius Black, and Severus Snape was about to find them. This would not go down well.

Turning to Remus, Sirius suddenly looked frantic, an expression that only became more wide eyed and desperate when he realised that Remus had raised his wand once more. "Remus. If I'm caught..."

"You'll be given the Dementors kiss. I know." Remus replied blandly, his mind too much of a whirl for him to do much else.

"Remus." Sirius entreated. "Please tell me you don't still believe..."

"I don't know what to believe right now!" Remus snapped back. The grate. They could still escape through the grate. They? Or He? He found himself looking from the door to the pile of broken furniture and back again, then finally at Sirius, who was growing increasingly agitated. He needed... he needed... He had so many more questions. Why did Sirius attack those girls in the hallway? Why if he was innocent did he laugh when the Muggles died? Who killed the Muggles, was it him? Or was that Peter too? Those and so many more. Questions he would never get answers to if Sirius was recaptured.

When Severus Snape finally broke through the charm keeping the door sealed and managed to force the broken furniture piled up against the door out of the way, he was rather irritated to realise he'd just wasted ten minutes of his life trying to get into an empty room.

* Colloportus Duro: Colloportus is a canonical spell for locking and sealing doors. Duro comes from the latin for strong, thus making this spell a stronger version of Colloportus. A similar extension is used in the third film to create Lumos Maxima: a brighter version of the Lumos Charm.

** Decido Modax: From Latin - Decido: Cut. Mordax: Corrosive. A Nasty spell of my own creation. I noticed that many canonical spells are derived from latin, but seem to have altered spellings or pronunciations. Hence the loss of the R in Mordax.