Author's Note: I'm trying out something new. This chapter is written in songfic fashion and set to the words of the Rascal Flatts song "Come Wake Me Up." I have heard it a million times and today as I actually listened to the lyrics in my car I just saw this chapter play out in my mind like scenes from a movie. The words and emotions they are singing in the song just seemed to fit so perfectly to what I saw happening in this chapter. Hope you like it!
- Detective Olivia Stabler -
One More Day
(Chapter Four: Come Wake Me Up)
Elliot sat alone in his bedroom staring out the window. The darkness of this particular night was deepened by the midnight storm that had blown in. Dark clouds hung so low they seemed to drown out the lights of the city and he had never felt more alone then he did in this moment.
Getting over her was something he knew would never happen. But getting on without her was proving to be equally challenging. He pressed his hand against the cold glass of the window as rain trickled down the outside of the pane.
I can usually drink you right off of my mind But I miss you tonight. I can normally push you right out of my heart But I'm too tired to fight
"I need you," he whispered as thunder crashed again.
Then there she stood. He could see her reflection in the glass of the window, standing behind him in the soft glow of the candle light. Elliot smiled and turned to face Olivia.
"We talked about this," she said softly.
"You said you would be here for me, as long as I needed you."
"I am here. But this isn't healthy."
"Being without you isn't healthy."
Elliot slipped his fingers between hers and placed her hand against his bare chest.
"Do you feel that?"
"Your heart," she replied staring into his eyes.
"It's broken. It hasn't been the same since the day I lost you."
"I'm not lost. More like….misplaced."
"I am being serious. Do you have any idea how bad it feels to go on not seeing you or talking to you or touching you? I am forever left wondering how it feels to hold you and touch you and…."
"And?" she asked as Elliot cupped his hand against her jaw and kissed her tenderly.
Another soft, but passionate kiss followed that. Then another and another.
Yeah the whole thing begins And I let you sink into my veins And I feel the pain like it's new Everything that we were, Everything that you said, Everything I did and that I couldn't do Plays through tonight
"Elliot, stop," she gasped as he nipped playfully at the sensitive flesh just below her ear.
"Why?" he asked before pressing his mouth to hers once more.
"This isn't right."
"Is this my dream or yours? I'm the one calling the shots here. This is my fantasy," he replied tracing his thumb over her full lips. "And I think this is exactly right."
"I don't want to hurt you," she blurted out.
"I'm already hurting. And this pain inside me, it's never going to stop. But I can still have you. Here in my dreams," he said with a smile. "Don't you get it, Liv? We are soul mates. We are so much a part of each other, not even death could keep us apart."
"But it isn't real. I'm not real. This is all in your head."
"You feel real," he said smoothing his fingertips slowly up her arm.
He stared deep into her eyes as he brushed his nose against hers. Then kissed her tenderly.
"And you taste real," he whispered before kissing her again.
Olivia slid her hand over his chest to feel his heartbeat once more. Then he watched as she slowly unbuttoned the dress she wore and let it fall to the floor.
"Tell me you want this as badly as I do," he whispered kissing her softly.
"I do want this. I always have," she replied softly.
Elliot lowered her slowly to the bed and there they made love for the first time.
Tonight your memory burns like a fire With every word it grows higher and higher I can't get over it I just can't put out this love I just sit in these flames and pray that you'll come back Close my eyes tightly. Hold on and hope that I'm dreaming Come wake me up.
After, she laid covered only by the thin material of the bed sheet and smiled as she stared at him across the pillow.
"Are you alright?" she asked.
"I am amazing. How are you?"
"Pretty good," she said with a shy smile and a laugh. "That was incredible."
"I always knew it would be."
"Now what?"
"I don't know," he replied shrugging his shoulders.
"It's your fantasy," she replied. "You call the shots, remember?"
"How could I forget?"
Olivia smiled again. He loved her smile. He loved everything about her. He loved her.
"You wanna do it again?" she asked with a sparkle in her eyes.
"You're not too tired?"
"It's a fantasy, remember? I am only tired if you want me to be."
"This is true."
"Or we could do something other than this. If you want to?"
Elliot smiled.
"Every time we do something other than this….you disappear on me."
"Hmm," she replied with a guilty smile.
Turn the TV up loud just to drown out your voice But I can't forget Now I'm all out of ideas And baby I'm down to my last cigarette Yeah you're probably asleep Deep inside of your dreams while I'm sitting here crying and trying to sleep Yeah wherever you are baby now I am sure you've moved on And aren't thinking twice about me and you tonight
Elliot laid there for hours watching her sleep. She seemd so comfortable, so at ease and so at peace. He knew this couldn't be real. That somehow it was all just a dream. But he didn't care. Here in this world he was with her. She was his and he was hers and there was nothing or no one who could keep them from each other. She was safe now. And here, he could keep her that way.
Tonight your memory burns like a fire With every word it grows higher and higher I can't get over it I just can't put out this love I just sit in these flames and pray that you'll come back Close my eyes tightly. Hold on and hope that I'm dreaming I know that you're movin' on I know I should give you up But I keep hopin' that you'll trip and fall back in love Cuz I'm feeling anything Baby this pain is worse than it ever was I know that you can't hear me but baby I need you to save me tonight
He watched her carefully. Every breath she took, inhaled and exhaled, he was memorized by her. He laid there exhausted, yet still somehow still so afraid to fall asleep. They were good here together. Safe and happy and in love. And as much as he knew he had to, Elliot didn't want to fall asleep. Or wake up. He just wanted to stay here, right here. In this bed. In the warmth and safety of her arms. In love with her, forever.
"You should get some rest," she whispered raising her head from his chest to look up at him.
"Maybe I'm not tired."
Olivia smiled.
"Maybe you are something else," she replied with a smile raising up to kiss him once more as the sheet slid away revealing everything it covered.
"Maybe," Elliot replied as she leaned in to kiss him and they made love once more.
Tonight your memory burns like a fire With every word it grows higher and higher I can't get over it I just can't put out this love I just sit in these flames and pray that you'll come back Close my eyes tightly. Hold on and hope that I'm dreaming Come wake me up. Oh I'm dreaming. Come wake me up. Oh, I'm dreaming.
A loud crash of thunder shook the apartment and jolted him awake. Elliot scratched his head and looked around the empty room realizing he was alone once more.
"It wasn't real. It was all just a dream," he mumbled to himself as he climbed from the bed.
He made his way into the kitchen. There sitting at the bar sipping a cup of coffee, was Olivia.
He rubbed his eyes to get a clearer look. Then pinched his arm to make sure he wasn't dreaming.
"Liv?"
"Hey," she replied with a smile. "It was so late when you finally fell asleep last night I guess I passed out, too. I took a shower and borrowed some clothes. I hope you don't mind."
"Not at all," he said smiling at the sight of her in his NYPD sweat shirt and boxer shorts.
"I wanted to make you breakfast. You have been having such a hard time lately. I got as far as the coffee before the early morning storm knocked out the power. But it's still hot," she replied pouring him a cup.
"Thanks," he said taking a sip of the strong dark liquid. "Listen, I know this is gonna sound strange, but did anything happen last night?" he asked scratching his head still not quite sure if he was awake or still dreaming.
"With us? No."
"Oh," he replied laughing as if he were joking.
"But it sounded like things got pretty hot between you and your dream girl."
Elliot spit coffee all over the counter.
"What?"
"You talk in your sleep. You didn't give her name, but you said something about it being your fantasy. Then I moved in here on the sofa," she said pointing to the pillow and blanket she'd left there. "You were moaning and asking her to do that again. It sounded like the two of you needed a little alone time," she said with a smile.
"This is so humiliating."
Olivia laughed.
"How long have you known me Stabler?"
"A very long time."
"Then you know you have nothing to worry about. Your little sex dream secret is safe with me," she said patting him on the chest.
"Thanks."
"No problem. Now get dressed or we are going to be late. We still have to stop by my apartment so I can grab some clothes for work."