/Okay my bad, Cas brushing his teeth came first! Hehe, I got the morning routine messed up xD Please R&R! Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated ^^ Anyway, I'll update as much as possible, and please PM me if you have a request or a prompt for me /
First Breakfast
Dean had hoped for pancakes with maple syrup and he was not disappointed. It was at moments like this that Dean really appreciated how well Bobby knew him. The three of them sat at the table in Bobby's kitchen. Bobby, looking to fatten up the scrawny former angel, piled eggs and bacon on his plate next to the pancakes. Dean got his fair share of pancakes and bacon, and as Bobby sat down he offered Castiel the maple syrup. Castiel took the bottle gingerly and stared at Dean, as if awaiting instruction.
Dean smiled at his lost expression and took the bottle of maple syrup. "No 1 rule of eating pancakes, Cas: lots of maple syrup." Dean doused his pile of pancakes with a generous helping of sugary syrup. Cas did the same with almost surgical precision, his brow furrowed in concentration. Dean grinned approvingly, and ignored the swoop of his gut when Castiel smiled shyly back. Bobby stared at the pair of them and rolled his eyes.
"If you two are done with the googly eyes, I need some help packin' more salt bullets and makin' hex bags, so join me when you boys are done." Bobby left the room, grumbling under his breath. Dean could've sworn he heard the phrase 'lovelorn idjit' but figured he must've misheard it.
"Eat up, Cas, it'll be good for you to keep busy." Dean said, conversationally. He was determined to stay away from the serious topics until Sam got back. Castiel was in a good mood, and he wanted him to be as emotionally stable as possible, though he wondered if that was even an option considering what Cas went through.
"I have never required sustenance before…" Castiel told Dean, unnecessarily, in Dean's opinion, as he poked at the cooling pancakes with his fork.
"Yeah well you do now." Dean told him, his voice masking a warning.
Castiel's blues clouded slightly, but cleared up again as he took an experimental bite of pancake. The lids of his eyes flew open and he gazed at Dean with such a look of wonder, Dean positively melted.
"I had no idea humans were capable of such culinary mastery!" Castiel exclaimed, with child-like awe. Dean guessed, in many ways, he was exactly that: a child.
"Yeah well, we've done a few things" Dean smirked.
"I am glad I fought for humans. They are worth saving." Castiel declared over another bite of pancake, his words slightly muffled.
A prick of sadness made Dean's smile twist slightly, but he joked it off, "You're saying that over pancakes?"
"They are very good pancakes, Dean." Castiel told him unsmiling. But something that twinkled in Castiel's eyes made Dean think that the former angel was attempting a joke. Dean laughed, and Castiel's cheeks took on a pretty shade of pink as his eyes crinkled. It was cute. Dean dropped his fork. He couldn't believe he just called the former angel of the Lord cute. Sure, Cas was attractive! In an abstract sense. But Dean Winchester was as straight as, well the straightest pole. He liked women.
So what if his stomach made a swan dive whenever Castiel smiled at him? That didn't make him gay for the guy…did it? Dean did not like the turn this mental conversation was taking, so he did what he always did. He ran away from it. Tossing his empty dish in the sink, he told Castiel to go help Bobby, and took off to wash the Impala.
Dean knew he could run away from Castiel, but he couldn't run away from his thoughts. As he washed the Impala, he evaluated the situation. He was lonely, and Cas was the only person he was emotionally close to besides Bobby and Sam. Castiel had pulled him out of Hell for chrissakes. He felt he owed the angel, and that had caused certain unforeseen emotions to rise and convince him that he was somehow attracted to Castiel.
Dean took the whole morning to wash and clean the Impala and during that time away from Castiel, he managed to convince himself that he was just lonely and acting on a need to be physically close to someone. He felt the only way to mend this was to go get laid. And he told himself that that was exactly what Dean Winchester was going to do.
Sam arrived around noon, as he had said he would, and Dean was out in the scrap yard to welcome him back to the fold. After clapping his ginormous brother on the back, they went inside to where Bobby and Castiel were packing hex bags to protect them from being seen by both demons and angels.
Sam hugged Castiel, the already small man looking even tinier wrapped in Sam's bear hug. The four of them gathered in Bobby's study and Castiel began to explain all that he remembered.
"I feel my memory beginning to fade already…" Castiel told them, a soulful look in his big blue eyes. "There are holes in what I remember."
"Just tell us what you know," Sam assured him, "We'll figure the rest out later."
"I remember Naomi tearing out my grace." Castiel closed his eyes, no doubt reliving the horrors in his head. "She said I was a disappointment, that I had betrayed our kind." A single tear escaped from Castiel's tightly shut eyes.
"What else Cas?" Dean asked, a steadying hand on Castiel's shoulder.
Castiel's face screwed up as he tried hard to collect his memories.
"Before that…She said, I….I needed to do…a penance…."
"A penance?" Sam asked.
Castiel opened his eyes. "Yes," He gazed at Sam, "A penance for what I had done to heaven. With Metatron." Castiel's eyes fell in shame.
"It wasn't your fault Cas. Metatron lied to you. He used you." Dean gripped Castiel's shoulder tightly, seething with rage at what Metatron had done to poor, innocent Cas. Castiel who had just been trying to do what was best for his home, to help his brothers and sisters. Castiel who had been betrayed by both the person he thought he could trust as well as the home he was trying to save.
"I should have done something." Castiel shook his head, "I deserve this punishment."
"No you don't Cas." Dean said harshly. "Don't you ever think that. You, of all people, do not deserve this. You're better off with a family that cares about you."
Castiel looked up with a surprised glance so full of hope and gratitude that it made Dean feel profoundly humble to be the recipient.
"Cas," Sam interrupted their little moment, "What penance did Naomi want you to do?"
Castiel only stared at Sam, "I don't recall. But I refused. That was why Naomi tore out my grace."
They wanted me to kill you.
"I think I know what the penance was." Dean said, weakly. "She wanted Cas to kill me."\
"But why?" Bobby asked.
"Hell if I know." Dean muttered.
"Hell…" Sam's head snapped up. "Maybe because you stopped me from closing the gates of hell!"
Castiel turned to Sam with a look of terror. "That was it! Naomi wanted me to kill Dean so that she could come to you with a deal."
"Lemme guess." Dean said, wryly. "Close the gates of hell, and we'll bring your brother back?"
"That is correct." Castiel affirmed.
"I would've done it too." Sam murmured.
"You know what this means don't 'cha?" Bobby's eyes burned with anger. "They're going to be after you boys."
Castiel nodded, sadly. "Dean and Sam still have the demon and angel tablets. The angels are going to be searching for it, as are the demons. The angels cannot close the gates of Hell without the demon tablet, and Heaven will not be safe unless they get back the angel tablet."
"They're both safe." Dean told Sam," They're in Bobby's panic room."
"We can't run from them forever Dean." Sam said, frustrated.
"There is a way." Castiel told them. "If I can get back my grace, I can destroy the angel and demon tablets forever."
Dean knew Castiel well enough to know when Castiel wasn't telling the full truth.
"What's the catch?" He asked.
Castiel hesitated, "It would mean the complete destruction of my grace. I could never be an angel ever again."
