Thanks again to all who have reviewed since (a very long time ago) I posted. Don't kill me! What with school starting and stuff, I've been pretty lax. Can you forgive me?

No?

Thanks to the two people who logged in, Alesia G and LummPumm. You make my day. Or week. Or month. Or… you know, just read the story.

:•) Stardrop5

Mal summed it up for everyone.

"So," He said, "Here's how it goes. River got a little upset when she saw all the dead people. Normally, that would be a-ok. But she ain't quite right, and she's taken all the medical supplies we have on the ship. On any normal transport- or any smuggler, come to think of it- that'd be fine, we'd hang out until we landed somewhere and we could get more. Unfortunately,-"

"Get on with it."

"Thank you, Jayne, for your opinion. As I was saying, unfortunately, our crew is not normal. We seem to get shot a little more than usual. So we gotta find moonbrain, and fast."

Simon stood up, and Mal paused and met his eyes. Simon shook his head. Everyone stared at them.

"Started a gorram secret code, I bet," Jayne muttered. Mal sat down and nursed his piece of chicken-shaped protein. Simon remained standing and started to talk quietly, although the crew wasn't really paying attention.

"Thing is, I think River went up into the ship. Into the air vents. Unless we have someone we can send after her, she's going to be very, very hard to find, and who knows where she put the supplies."

Simon seemed to notice that only Kaylee was paying him any attention. The rest of the crew was muttering, and Simon sat grumpily, red-faced.

Mal shouted for order and everyone but Jayne looked at him. "Here's what I propose. We go to Whitefall."

Zoe flinched. "How many times has Patience shot you? Do you really think that's smart, being all supplies-less, sir? Also, Whitefall is… pretty far away."

"Aw, she won't shoot me. Not after our display of awesomeness last time we were there. Anyways, where else do we go? Back to Kerry?"

{}{}{}{}{}

Of course, the trip was long and they weren't prepared for it. All they had was the protein they'd kept from the useless trip to Kerry. It would, Mal thought, be enough for the journey, but once they were there they would have to borrow some food from Patience.

Borrow. Hah.

Anyways, Mal was hopeful for the trip. At least, he was hopeful for the journey there. From then on, it looked pretty bleak. He twiddled with the dash controls, making sure they were going in an absolutely straight line towards Whitefall.

He thought about Patience. She would probably shoot him again, but so what? He'd shoot her right back. No matter that the crew would probably kill him by accident, without supplies. No problem, he'd delegate to Jayne. He shuddered at the thought and readjusted the perfectly straight line to Whitefall.

That 'morning', they found River.

She was tucked up under some equipment, chin on her knees, arms hugging her legs to her. She completely ignored all the people around her, instead murmuring something about flowers. Simon pushed in front of a loudly protesting Jayne and crouched next to her. "Mei-mei, what's wrong?"

She looked at him, and her eyes focused. "Lost the medicine," she murmured. "Fell into the air vent and lost." She turned and looked at Mal. "Don't worry. I can- I can fix it."

Amazing, thought Mal. She sounded lucid when she said that. It wasn't like he believed her, but having a less-than-crazy genius around was more helpful than a crazy genius.

They landed on Whitefall two days later, with their protein just about gone. The tired crew trooped out into the sunlight, and Mal pointed towards a horizon.

"That's the way!" He shouted, making sure that Simon and Kaylee, who were looking at things, could hear him. "We walk that way for a while- just until that ridge, then we go down into a valley there."

They started off, a shambling troop of rather sleepy people in a line. Mal first, then Zoe, Simon, River, Kaylee, and last was Jayne. Inara had chosen to remain on the boat.

They reached the valley at the same time as Patience did. Mal had had a short and rather unsweet conversation with her over the comm, and she didn't look surprised or anything. She didn't have a gun, not that they could see, anyways. She smiled down at Mal from on her horse. "Ah, Mal!' she said. "You came to visit me. How… nice."

"Just for a while. Drop in on our favorite client."

"Of course. I'd be paying for food and board, hmm?"

"Uh, yeah."

"And your men… and women," she acknowledged. "They have guns?"

"Uh, yeah…"

Patience had a rifle trained on Mal faster than he could see where she pulled it from. She let out a humorless cackle. "Don't you see, Malcolm? You aren't my friend, and I don't trust you."

"That's kind of… obvious, ain't it? Big gun in my nose, no hospitality whatsoever. Ya wanna point that somewhere else?"

"No."

"Too bad. So, say I said I don't care if you shoot me. What would you do?"

Patience started to really laugh. "Not care? I'm willing to bet you have no supplies. Why else would you come to me? I don't think it's possible not to care. In answer to your question, I'd still shoot you."

Going cross-eyed looking down the gun, Mal was out of ideas. All he could think was he really, really did not want Jayne to become captain. "Zoe?"

"Sir?"

"When she shoots, kill her."

"Yes, sir."

Patience found herself looking down three gun barrels, Zoe, Jayne and River. She pulled her rifle- and pointed it at Kaylee.

"You willing to let her die?"

Several things happened very fast.

Simon shouted "NO!" and threw himself in front of Kaylee, River stepped in front of Simon, Jayne and Zoe both shot Patience in the chest, and halfway from falling off her horse, she let a bullet fly.

Someone screamed, and in the ensuing chaos that followed, Mal tried to duck out of the way of anything flying at him. When the horse had galloped away, Patience fallen, and everyone settled, he could see through the dust. Someone had to be hit. Someone had screamed. It could have been anyone, even Jayne if he'd been hit in the balls.

He met everyone's eyes.

Cliffy! Sooo sorry, I don't write stories with cliffies… except for this one. Who should be shot? Remember, the character's lives are in my foolish, clumsy hands. You don't want me to drop them, do you? Muahaha.

If you don't want your favorite character dead, press that review button and tell me who they are.

Please?

Stardrop