"Come on, Crusaders! You can do it!" Sweetie Belle yelled, standing on top of the chaotic mess of a statue Scootaloo and Applebloom were pulling through the abandoned streets of Canterlot. Scootaloo looked up disbelievingly at the white filly. Sweat was starting to form on her face and Applebloom was panting with exertion.

"Oh yeah, like you can talk! Why don't you come down and help us?" Applebloom nodded her approval. Sweetie humphed with annoyance, a smirk on her face.

"Because I was the one who acquired the wagon!" It was true- Sweetie Belle had claimed to have "contacts" in Canterlot (aka, some of Rarity's clients) and she had sweet-talked them into letting them lend the wagon. Scootaloo looked unimpressed, but continued pulling without argument. Maybe she could earn her cutiemark in delivery service. She knew Ponyville needed a new mailmare anyway- the clumsy pegasus they currently had often delivered the wrong packages to the wrong addresses.

"Hey! Ah think ah see the train station, Scoots!" Applebloom said, and she was right. With a final heave, the two fillies pulled the cart into the train station, causing Sweetie Belle to fall off the top. Suddenly, a look of panic crossed her eyes.

"There's no way they'll let us in with Discord!" Sweetie exclaimed, so the Crusaders sat down and thought for a while. Little did they know a purple pony passed by them, her expression turning to alarm when she saw their package. The Crusaders, too busy thinking, ignored her, and Applebloom was suddenly struck by an idea.

"What if we use our capes to cover up the statue?" she said, and the two other fillies looked at her like she had just cracked the meaning of life. They nodded simultaneously and untied their capes, throwing them over the statue with a flourish. Then they bought their tickets and headed onto the train.

Leaving behind an extremely confused and surprisingly sober Berry Punch as a witness to their crime.

"Okay, Crusaders!" Sweetie Belle announced, her high-pitched voice filling the clubhouse where the Crusader's newest acquirement was hidden, "We have two options here!" Applebloom and Scootaloo were looking towards Sweetie Belle intently. Being the sister of Rarity gave her an automatic diploma in the area of love, even though technically Applebloom was more qualified, having successfully drawn the attention of a certain baby dragon, and having helped her shy brother finally propose to the pegasus of his eye.

"What are they?" Applebloom asked, and Sweetie pulled out a large poster board from behind Discord to help explain her theories. Upon it a drawing of a sad Pinkie Pie was placed in the middle of Discord and and the outline of a stallion. All of which had five legs, for some unexplained reason.

"Number one!" Sweetie Belle pointed to the strange drawing of Discord, "We free Discord, which we seem to have a talent for, and get Pinkie her true love back, or," This time her hoof hit the stallion, "We find her a new love interest."

"Doesn't she already have one? Rainbow and Pinkie are dating, aren't they?" Scootaloo added in, but Sweetie Belle shushed her.

"She obviously isn't very happy with her!" Applebloom nodded, agreeing with Sweetie. If Pinkie was happy with Rainbow, then she wouldn't be all sad about Discord.

"Either way, option one is preferred in my case," Scootaloo reasoned, "Remember the whole Hearts and Hooves day mess? We kinda failed at finding Cheerilee a date. Besides, Plan One had the added advantage of raining candy."

"Well Ah opt for option two. Mah sister was in big trouble the last time Discord was out. And we nearly lost all ah crops because of him." Applebloom added, shooting a disapproving look at Scootaloo. Tension was mounting between the two ponies.

"I personally agree with Applebloom, Rarity almost squashed me with that dumb rock she brought in," Sweetie stated. Applebloom winced. Ouch, that must have hurt.

"Humph. Well I guess we could try Big Macintosh again."

Applebloom shook her head. "Big Mac's already married! You can't just go around pairing up married men with mares, it's just not right!"

"How were we supposed to know that?"

"You attended the wedding, Scootaloo!"

A crack.

"Well I just forgot then! You should have reminded me!" Scootaloo argued weakly. Applebloom glared at her.

"It was a week ago! You really have a short memory! Like a chicken!" Scootaloo's eyes lit with a raging fire.

"What did you just call me?"

"Ah chicken."

A crack.

"I will kill you!" Scootaloo screamed, diving towards Applebloom. The yellow filly shrieked, and dodged, toppling over Discord's half-cracked statue, sending it falling right next to Sweetie Belle, who noticed the statue's condition.

"Bauck bauck!" Applebloom taunted. Sweetie paled as she watched the statue crack further. A claw was exposed. Scootaloo screamed in rage, diving back on to Applebloom.

A tail was revealed.

"Guys..." Sweetie Belle said weakly. It was too late. The last chucks of the stone fell away, leaving... nothing. Rubble was left at Sweetie's feet. The two fighting Crusaders were snapped out of their spat by the sound of the statue smashing. As the three looked down at the rubble, Scootaloo summed up the situation pretty well.

"We're dead."

#PAGEBREAK

It was amazing how fast news travelled in Ponyville. Especially when a being of mass destruction was involved. All it took was some well placed cries of terror from one Berry Punch and the whole town was anxious. They only started getting terrified when a stories of a blue box materialising out of thin air starting circulating around, the gossip claiming it was Discord's work.

Of course it actually wasn't, but was something equally strange. The blue box was the TARDIS, the spaceship of Doctor Whooves, the last Time Pony. Of course, it had to be Lilly Valley who witnessed the TARDIS landing. She was just watering the flowers in a quiet spot of the town when she heard a wheezing, groaning sort of noise. Curious, she hid behind some bushes and saw what few ponies had ever seen before, a true once-in-a-lifetime experience.

And then she promptly told everyone she knew.

Now, when one happens to be the last Time Pony and a time-travelling one at that, one tends to keep one's secrets. So it was no surprise that Doctor Whooves and his companion Derpy had both taken on fake names in order to keep quiet. They were known to the town as Time Turner and Ditzy Doo, but as soon as they stepped out of the TARDIS they were Discord's evil soldiers. Both of them were unaware of this new development.

"Here we are, Derpy!" The Doctor said, stepping out of his spaceship,"Ponyville, just in time for Winter Wra- hang on. Where's all the snow? Oh, blast it, the TARDIS got it wrong again, didn't she?"

Derpy sighed, trying to roll her crossed eyes. "Obviously, Doctor. When are we?"

The Doctor pulled out his sonic screwdriver, fumbling with it a bit in his hooves before giving up and holding it in his mouth. "Hearts and Hooves Day, 2002 AC. Something must be wrong if the TARDIS brought us here," he said, mumbling it through the screwdriver in his mouth.

"On Hearts and Hooves Day? Seems like a pretty nice day to me."

"No, the TARDIS always takes us where we need to be. There must be something wrong."

Derpy sighed again, walking after the Doctor as he trotted along, sonicing every tree. Why couldn't the TARDIS have just taken them here for a date. If the ship really was as perceptive as the Doctor said it was, it must have picked up on Derpy's hopeless crush quite some time ago. Maybe this was its strange way of trying to set the two up.

"A-ha!" the Doctor cried, dropping his sonic and pointing at a piece of stone on the ground. It appeared to be part of the wing of a statue. Derpy paled as the Doctor peered more closely at the broken wing. Could it be... Not them...

Derpy gazed among the trees, keeping her eyes wide open, both staring awkwardly at different places. "D-doctor?" she asked, her terror clear in her voice, "a-are there-"

The Doctor quickly looked up from the statue, his eyes widening at the implication in Derpy's half-question. "NO! No. No. Not the angels. This wing is a bat's, see? It's just radiating a lot of time energy, that's all. And even if it was an angel's, nothing can kill them when they're stone. Which means this wing would have moved a long time ago."

Derpy sighed, relieved. Trust the Doctor to terrify her over nothing. "So what is it, then?"

"Oh, Derpy. My dear Derpy. Something much worse." the Doctor replied, his eyes dark. Derpy gulped nervously. Worse than the angels? The whole reason her eyes were bent were the angels, although that's a different story.

Suddenly, a high pitched war cry rang through the clearing. The Doctor and Derpy froze, as a huge mob of candy-coloured ponies burst through the entrance to the town.

"GET THEM!" a pastel yellow pony yelled.

"Derpy," the Doctor whispered, backing away slowly, "I think we should..."

"RUUUUUUNNNNNNN!" They both cried simultaneously, galloping away from the mob of angry ponies.