Pretty Poison

(Chapter Twelve: Helpless)

Olivia opened her eyes to the soft sounds of the baby crying in the other room. She rolled over and turned off the monitor so he wouldn't wake Elliot, as she climbed from the bed and picked up her gown from the floor and slipped it back on. She looked at Elliot asleep in the bed and leaned in to kiss him gently before heading down the hall to check on their son.

Tonight was the first time since Olivia had given birth to Noah that they had made love. Their son was now eight weeks old and between the rush at work and keeping up with appointments for the baby they hadn't really had much time alone together.

Earlier that afternoon as she got off work Olivia had gone to pick Noah up from Kathy's and then headed back to her apartment. Elliot had driven himself that morning because Olivia had to take Noah for a check up at the pediatrician's office and then went in to work a little while after that.

When she and her son arrived home, Elliot was already there. Olivia held the baby in one arm and unlocked the door balancing the diaper bag and a stack of files in her other hand. As she stepped inside and called to Elliot she noticed a vase of red long stem roses and the most wonderful aroma filling the apartment.

"Hey you," Elliot said returning from the living room where he had lit a few candles and turned on some soft romantic music to set the mood.

"Hey. What are you up to?"

"Nothing. I just realized that you and I have not had any couple time at all since our beautiful son was born."

"So, I have arranged for a nice romantic evening for mommy and daddy. Daddy is going to give Noah a bottle, then he is going into his room to watch the new movie daddy got for him."

Olivia smiled as Elliot took the baby from her arms. "Elliot it is too early for him to go to bed, he will be up again at like three in the morning and not want to go back to sleep."

"Liv, it is already after seven. By the time I feed him and play with him a little and give him his bath, it will be late enough he should sleep. Besides, I talked to Kathy and asked her to try and keep him awake more today so he would sleep good tonight."

"You did, huh?"

"Yes, I did. And I bought a bottle of your favorite wine."

"Oh El, that is really sweet. But I can't, not while I am breast feeding anyway. Just a little sip gives him a horrible belly ache."

"Well, we'll have to save it for later." Elliot kissed her lips gently. "Why don't you go relax. I have already started dinner. I am going to go change little man here and then get him a bottle."

"If you have him I might take a quick bath."

"Sure baby, take your time." Elliot winked at her. "I think my son and I are going to turn on the last of the ball game and get him fed. We got about another hour on dinner, it's in the oven."

"Well, it smells amazing, whatever it is."

"Baked Italian Chicken with mushrooms."

"Sounds good. This is such a good surprise." Olivia kissed Elliot then kissed the top of Noah's head as she handed Elliot the bottle she had heated up. "I'm going to get in the bath, I wont be too long. I want to play with him a little before he goes to bed. What movie did you buy him?"

"Umm…another Baby Einstein video. He loves them. All the bright colors, he just stares at the screen."

"He does love them. Kathy plays them for him over there, too."

Olivia ran a hot bath to soak and relax for a little while then returned to the nursery to find Elliot had finished feeding Noah and given him his bath already. He was putting a fresh diaper on his son and putting into his sleeper when Olivia came back in the room.

"Did he eat good?"

"About half the bottle."

"I'll nurse him for a little while before I lay him down." Olivia reached down and picked up her son from the changing table. She cradled him in her arms and kissed his little hands as the baby cooed.

"I'm gonna go check on dinner," Elliot said as he walked back down the hall toward the kitchen.

Olivia carried Noah back to the living room and laid him on a blanket in the floor. She scattered a few toys and a rattle around the blanket and laid in the floor to play with him. Around eight fifteen, she picked the baby up and headed down the hall to the nursery to nurse him and put him in bed.

Olivia rocked her son as she nursed him. Noah batted his dark eyelashes and closed his sleepy eyes as moved his little fingers in Olivia's hair. When the baby had fallen asleep she picked him up and tucked him into his crib, turning on the baby monitor.

When she returned Elliot had set the table with candles and they enjoyed a romantic meal. He took her by the hand and lead her into the living room where they slow danced and held each other tight. A little while later they decided to retire for the evening. They checked on the baby and turned off his television and headed down the hall to their room for a little grown up time.

Olivia smiled as she looked back at Elliot now. He had gone out of his way to make tonight special and romantic for her. And when he made love to her he was slow and sweet and gentle and amazing, taking his time with her until she was ready for him. He was the most wonderful man she had ever known and she was so lucky to have him in her life.

She walked into the nursery and checked on Noah by the glow of the night light. She reached into the crib and picked her son up in her arms as she moved to the rocking chair to rock him and nurse him for a little while. She hummed softly to the baby boy as he stared up at her with Elliot's big blue eyes.

Olivia smiled down at him as she buttoned up the front of her gown and raised the baby to her shoulder to burp him. Afterward she stood up and walked slowly around the nursery rocking him. Noah snuggled his little face in against her collar bone and began to fuss a little.

Olivia whispered softly to him and patted his little back, but things only seemed to get worse. She held the baby in her arms and carried him to the changing table to look him over. She checked his diaper again and it was fine. But the infant's sad little sobs soon became cries of anger and frustration.

Olivia watched as tiny little tears fell from Noah's eyes. She couldn't take much more of this, she hated seeing him cry and not knowing what to do to sooth him.

"Oh baby, don't cry. Mommy's sorry," she said softly as she scooped the infant up in her arms and raised him to kiss his forehead. But this time something was different. She kissed the baby again and propped him against her chest as Elliot turned on the lamp in the corner of the room.

"What's up?" He asked walking over to survey the screaming infant.

"I think he feels warm, Elliot."

Elliot leaned down to kiss the baby's forehead. Then he brushed his fingers across the Noah's flushed cheeks.

"He has a fever. Where is the thermometer?"

"In the basket under the changing table."

Elliot moved to get the thermometer while Olivia laid the baby back down on the changing table. Elliot placed the tip of the instrument into the baby's ear as Olivia tried to occupy him to keep him from moving around. Finally it beeped.

"102.6," Elliot read off the numbers as they flashed. "I'll call the pediatrician."

Olivia took a deep breath as she tried to keep from crying. This was the first time Noah had ever been sick. The thought of her baby being in pain and her not knowing what to do to make him better was almost too much. She moved to the bathroom and got a cool damp wash cloth then carried her son back to the nursery and held him in the rocking chair as she placed the cool wash cloth over his forehead in an attempt to lower his fever. She rocked him and held him tight and sang softly to him, but nothing seemed to work.

A few minutes later Elliot returned to the nursery. "He said to watch his temperature closely. Use a cool wash cloth for a few minutes," Elliot smiled upon realizing she already had one. "He wais keep that on him for a few minutes. If his temp does not go down any then try a cool bath. He said if it goes any higher or he stops nursing then bring him in. He said it is probably due to the shots he got in his appointment this morning. He said to give him baby Tylenol and watch him closely. If it continues through tomorrow or he shows signs of a cough or wheezing, bring him back in."

"So that's it? He just thinks it is because of the shots?"

"Right now, yes. And what you are doing is exactly what we need to be doing. We have to give him the medicine and wait it out."

"God, I just feel so horrible. I mean listen to him. Obviously he is in pain of some kind and I can't even help him." Elliot watched as Olivia began to cry.

"Hey, it is going to be okay. Babies get sick all of the time and they turn out fine. I'll check him again and I am sure he will calm down in a few minutes. We'll bring him into the bedroom tonight, so he is right there with us if he needs us. Baby, we are doing everything we are supposed to be going."

Olivia drew a staggered breath and nodded her head as Elliot wiped the tears from her eyes.

"I just feel so helpless," she whispered looking down at her son.

Elliot took Noah's temperature again and it had already began to lower. He gave him some medicine and Olivia rocked him in the rocking chair again.

"Why don't you try nursing him again. Just to see if that calms him any. I am going to pull the bassinette from the living room back into the bedroom and get his pacifier."

Olivia sat in the chair and rocked the baby and nursed him while she sang to him. After several minutes he had calmed down and almost gone back to sleep. She stood up and moved slowly down the hall toward their bedroom. She raised Noah to her shoulder and burped him, then rocked him gently in her arms until he had fallen back to sleep. Elliot checked his temperature one more time and then She laid the baby in the bassinette and tucked his blanket tight around him and kissed his little forehead.

Elliot slipped his arms around her waist as they stared down at the sleeping baby.

"Well, we survived our first fever," he said softly.

Olivia turned and looked up at him, her eyes full of tears once more. "I have never been so scared of anything in my life."

"You did really well, sweetheart. These things happen sometimes. And you learn from them. And the next time he has a fever, we know that things to try on our own, before we call the doctor. It is scary. But it is all part of being a parent. And there will be bumps and bruises and scraped knees and broken hearts. And each time we will learn a little more, how to handle each situation. Having babies, kids in general is scary business. You want nothing more than to be able to protect them from everything, but you can't. I love you." Elliot hugged her tight as he felt her exhale deeply.

"I love you, too. And I don't know what I would have done if you weren't here. It may have been just a little low grade fever, but it scared the hell out of me. I don't know anything about babies and fevers."

"Honey, I didn't either. Until I had kids. You will learn this. And every time he cries or gets sick, you will worry. Hell, sometimes you worry for no reason at all. But before long you will handle this like a pro. When he cries or is sick, you will just jump into mommy mode and it will all be routine."

"You think so?"

"Yes, I do."

"You are an amazing mommy. Noah is a very lucky little guy. And he knows it."

Olivia looked down at her son asleep wrapped tight in his favorite blanket and she couldn't help but smile as the baby smiled in his sleep.

"God, I have so much to learn."

"So do I."

"Do you think he is a happy baby?"

"I know he is, Liv. He is happy and healthy. All babies get fevers now and then."

"You thing we are doing a good job raising him?"

"Yes, I do. And do you now what else I think?"

"What?"

Elliot kissed the beck of her head.

"I think maybe we should get a little rest while he is asleep. We can get up again in a few hours and check him again. But if you don't get some rest, you are going to end up sick."

"Okay," Olivia said with a smile as she hugged him tight.