Warning - This chapter is full of fluff, all the pillows in my house are now fluff-less because all the fluffiness has been transferred here. Reason? Because I am a single, boyfriend-less girl and I am currently living my romantic life through Remus and Tonks :P

I do not own Harry Potter... obviously! (*rolls eyes*)

Mid-September

Remus Lupin was sitting in library, facing the fire, on the sofa and was doing one of the most dangerous things - Thinking! He was damned and he knew it. Things with Tonks were getting serious, even though nothing had been said by either of the parties... Yet. But it wasn't a secret between them that they both fancied each other. Who was he kidding? This... whatever it was between them ran deeper down 'just a fancy'... at least from his side. The moment he had set his eyes on her, he had known it was never going to be just a fling or something casual. And he also knew she wasn't the type of girl to do causal encounters either.

They could both see in each other's eyes. The way they behave could have easily passed as friends but they knew it was more than that. How a mere touch of a finger caused the other to shiver or how they often caught each other staring when they thought the other was not looking or how they looked for excuses to touch or to linger just a moment more.

He could easily tick his options on his fingers. He knew he was serious for her, now, the two scenarios were, that either she felt the same way about him or she did not. Part of him, noble part of him hoped that it was just a crush that she felt that would fade away with time, but there was other part of him that pained at this prospect. The noble part of him didn't want her to get hurt by committing herself in a relationship with him, a relationship which was very complicated, which would never be accepted in society. But the selfish part of him, part which said that he too deserves happiness in his life, wanted to scream to hell with society. The same selfish part wanted Tonks to return his feelings so that they can be together, so that he can make her his sweetheart, that part believed that mutual love will overcome every complication, every problem.

He could hear a voice in his head, a voice that so resembles Sirius saying it's not as if you have to marry her, it's too early for that. Yes it was too early for thinking such heavy things such as marriage, but didn't it is where a long term relationship leads? Granted he would be happy and content in just being with her but it wouldn't be fair on his part to burden her with that. She must have seen dreams regarding her marriage, her wedding, how can he expect such a big sacrifice on her part? What kind of husband will he become, where the wife will have to arrange her schedule as per full moon? Where he couldn't even gift her expensive materials because of his ever lasting poverty? Who knew how long this war will last, what if they lose? The condition and prejudice regarding werewolves will be worse. How will she face bigotry that will come by association to her? And children... He forced his mind wheels to come to a halt. He was thinking too ahead. What if she didn't even want to be with him in the first place? But What if she did? The same question arises again that where the relationship will lead...

Just to avoid all these complications he sometimes hoped that nothing was serious from her part. But then if that was true, he will be crushed. He kept wondering what will be complicating things more. Her returning his feelings or her not returning his feelings?

He felt a headache coming it was all very confusing. Every time he tried to think, he felt like he was caught in a never ending cycle. He had no clue what to do, and decided that he will let the things go, as they were going. But he will not be able to escape from it forever, he will have to face it soon. He knew she had seen love in his eyes. Love that wanted more than just being friends. Soon she will question him... he knew what she will ask of him... What will he do then?

He sighed. He was damned and he knew it.

He was lost in his musings but jerked out of them when a scent filled his nose. Her scent. It was enough to make his heart race. He didn't even heard her coming. He felt her small cold hands crept to his shoulders and felt her squeeze his shoulders. He didn't knew that the shiver that ran down his spine was because of her touch or the sudden cold that her hands have brought or both.

"Wotcher Remus" Her sweet quiet voice, so like music filled the silent library.

He closed his eyes and let his head fall back at her loving touch. He felt electricity down to his very core. "Hello Nymphadora"

She didn't admonished him for calling her by her name, she hardly did these days. Whether it was due to the fact that she had resigned herself that he would never call her Tonks or whether she liked her name when he said it, He didn't knew. But he felt special that only he was allowed to address her by her first name.

She didn't removed her hands, rather started softly pressing his shoulders, kneading softly. "You are all in knots" she said while pressing her thumbs into the side of his neck. "Is there anytime you are not so tense?"

He could hear her frowning without even looking at her. He tried to form words, which he was finding quite difficult, with her hands applying pressure at all his sore muscles. This was another aspect of their relationship that he had grown comfortable with. He hardly felt so cozy and comfy with a person, let alone a woman. He was often cautious and wary regarding physical touch. Hardly anyone wants be in a close proximity with a werewolf, handshakes, hugs, pat on back was rare occurrences to him. His being a werewolf colored everyone's perception. But with her it feels natural. He now yearned her touch, it was soothing.

He opened his eyes and found two big brown eyes, that he had come to love so much, peering into his dark blue ones. He felt her breath on his face but instead of shying away from it, he felt serene, as usual. He tried to breathe her in.

He exhaled slowly and said raising his eyebrows at her "When you are as old as me, you cannot be anything but tense."

She rolled her eyes at him "Oho Remus, how old are you? Hundred and forty two?" She said but didn't ceased movements of her hands. He was sure though if she continued doing it, he will lose all coherent thoughts. He brought his both hands and halted her movements by catching her each hand in each of his, and placed delicate little kiss to each of her palms. Lately, there places of kisses were also increasing, earlier it was limited to cheeks during good-byes and good-nights, then it progressed to foreheads, top of heads, hands and they no longer waited for good-night for pressing a kiss to the other... he wondered soon it will reach to lips...

She sighed happily at his kiss. He pulled her forward by hand so that now her cheek rested beside his cheek, her arms dangling from his neck, hugging his neck from behind, and her hands were caught in his, with only back of sofa between them. The feel of her soft cheek on his stubbled one was exciting. He rubbed his rough cheek against her soft one, lightly. If he would have known any spell, he would have ceased the time because he had no desire of going anywhere from here, no desire to leave her side or her warm presence. He was like gray in the sky before sunrise and she was his rose-pink light of dawn.

Oh how much he loves her... she has no idea...

"How come you are early from work? And why are your hands so exceptionally cold? It's not even that cold outside" he asked her, rocking there heads slightly and he wonders if speaking words will break the peaceful aura that surrounds them.

"Take it as a disadvantage of being a m. m. magus "

"M. m. magus ?" and he wondered how come her hands are so cold but rest of her body is radiating warmth.

"Hmm... Metamorphmagus is such a long word, takes about 2 second to roll off my tongue and when I was a child I was hardly able to pronounce it, so I shorten it to m. m. magus. "

He chuckled. It was such a tonks-thing to do.

"Alright then, how is your being m. m. magus related to your cold hands?"

"Well I have always had this problem and since m. m. magus are so rare I can hardly confirm my theory with other but healer at St. Mongos probably guessed that it has to do something with the blood of m. m. magus , so whenever it gets even a little cold outside, my hands, my feet and nose are always colder than others" Then as if to prove her point she suddenly pressed tip of her nose to his exposed neck above his collar, he yelped at the sudden cold.

"Blimey Nymphadora, you are a walking freezer!" He tried not to get distracted from combination of her cold nose and warm breath when she chuckled in return.

"And you are a walking comforter." She then nuzzled her nose in his neck and he felt a fluttering in his chest and stomach. He couldn't help but notice that way she inhaled his scent in the process, under the pretense of nuzzling. His breath quickened at the thought. No other person makes him feel the way she does.

He pulled her forward, indicating the place next to him on sofa "Come on then, sit with me" and she gladly obliged. He propped his legs on the table and she curled up around him. Encircling her arms around his waist, pulling up her legs, folding them and placing them on his thighs. And lastly she placed her head on his shoulder. He in return enveloped his one arm around her shoulder and pulled her closer. He couldn't help but his heart swelled a little at such intimacy, he thanked his stars for her being in his arms, because it felt like heaven. He felt so alive at all the places she touched him. He tingled all over at her touch, at her closeness, he could practically feel the warmth radiating from her. This was what was missing from his life all these years. How is he ever going to survive without this?

When did you became from a stranger to such an inseparable part of my life? What am I going to do without you, dearest? Surely, you deserve more than a battered broken werewolf, you deserve someone whole and young like you, but how, oh but how will I ever manage to see you with another man?

As soon as that thought entered his mind, an unbidden image sprung up in front to his eyes, Nymphadora in a wedding gown, next to a handsome faceless man. He felt his blood boil and a felt a sudden ache in chest as if someone had set his heart ablaze. He tightened his hold on her and pulled her to him, his other hand encircled around her waist possessively.

"Remus?" Her voice came as a wonderful distraction from painful thoughts.

"Hmm, N. dora "

She raised one eyebrow at him and asks with a half curious smile playing on her lips "N. dora ?"

He nodded. "You see, I have figured your problem" he said while making a show of looking pensive, staring at the ceiling and then back at her "I think that, you apparently can't pronounce your own name therefore insist everyone that your name is Tonks" he said and ducked from the blow he knew was coming from her. And indeed it came.

She poked him in the ribs rather pointly and and mock-glared at him "I can very well pronounce Nymphadora" she completed with shudder.

"Oh but your secret is in open. You shortened metamorphmagus because its long and difficult to pronounce, I thought I would do same with your name and call you N. dora"

"Or you can call me Tonks" she rolled her eyes at him.

"I will start calling you Tonks, the day you start calling me Lupin" he challenged her, raising his eyebrow at her knowing very well that she will relent.

"Fine, Remus! just call me Dora then. But not in front of others, I don't want them to pick up same habit as yours."

A name from him to her, that only he could call her, I rather like the idea.

"Dora it is then" he smiled at her and adjusted his hold on her, placed his one arm around her waist and stroked mass of pink fluff on her head, that she called hair, with the hand that was draped around her shoulders. She settled back on his shoulder. "So, Dora, what were you saying earlier?"

She became oddly quiet for a moment and he thought she wasn't going to say anything, but then she said in a voice that sounded small, unlike her "What do you think of me?"

He looked at her a little surprised with such a question. She was biting her lower lip and he felt an urge to pull that lip out of her teeth delicately and instead bite it for her. She looked like she was questioning her wisdom of asking him such a question. She looked a little insecure and not for first time, he observed that she tried to hide all her insecurities under her jovial personality, which a common person will probably not notice. He decided to be honest, but before he could have said anything, she spoke again.

"I mean, like when you met me for the first time, what did you thought of me? Didn't my attire bothered you?"

When I saw you first time, I thought you have the most beautiful eyes I have ever seen. He decided to not to tell her that part.

"Tonks..err.. Dora" he corrected and smiled at her "I have learned my lesson hard way, after being treated by people the way I have been, when they find out that I am a werewolf, I know never to form opinion and judge one by their appearances." He looked into her eyes and found her staring back into his eyes. He swallowed.

"I thought, you looked rather cute" he emphasized by poking her waist lightly and making her squirm. "But what struck to me most about you was, that even though you looked like a modern youngster, you didn't behaved like them- I mean, you weren't ignorant like others, spending time at home or partying thinking Voldemort was not back, But you not only understood but also decided to do something about it. And I couldn't help but notice that you weren't just a pretty face but also intelligent, smart and with sharp common sense, and trust me when I say that because I know common sense is not so common in people."

She nodded and put her head back on his shoulder and tightened her hold on his waist. He touched her foot with the hand that was on her waist, and true to her words they were icy cold, he closed his big hand around both her feet and rubbed lightly to warm them. He could't help but think that this will be what it will be like to be with her together, spending leisure time within the confines of the room with war worries left behind. "Why did you ask?"

"Just felt like asking.. I mean it's not daily that anyone compliments me and you are good for my ego" Her voice was muffled into his chest, he felt vibrations going through it and goosebumps erupted all over his body at the sensation. Though she has said lightly enough to pass it off as a joke, he knew there was uncertainty in her tone and decided to drop off the subject for her sake. He rather asked a question that had been buzzing in his mind for a long time though her warm breath was distracting him and he noticed that her head has shifted from his shoulder to his chest and felt like doing a small victory dance. His heart was beating faster than normal and he knew she will be able to feel it, if not hear it.

"Dora... Why my being werewolf never bothered you?" he asked tentatively, waiting nervously for her answer.

She looked up, placed her chin on his chest and peered through her pink fringe that was now peppered with red. Her nose and lips were now dangerously close to his and the temptation to cover the distance was maddening. "Why should it? You are a wolf only on full moon night, only for few hours, rest of the time you are as human as next person"

"But other people rather take me as a monster." he said frowning

She smoothed off his frown with her finger and then placed her hand on his cheek, stoking lightly. "To hell with other people, I am not other people, other people are ignorant. I mean their logic is at fault. They say werewolf are monster and bite innocent children and people but they tend to forget if that the same innocent person is bitten, he will turn into a werewolf too, then how just a bite will rob them of their innocence? And it's not even in your control, why to blame you for something that is not under your command and you are helpless in front of it." she looked into his eyes and kissed tip of his nose. "And you are the most wonderful man I have ever met." she whispered the last part.

She was looking at him intensely as if captivated and he was sure that he was looking at her the same way. He could see longing in her eyes and he felt his mouth go dry. Was this finally the time? He could feel her breath on his lips, slightly flushed cheeks and his own breathing was quickening. She shifted her glance from her eyes to his lips and he swallowed. His heart was beating fast and blood was pounding in his ears, he was sure he wouldn't be able to hear anything over the pounding. She looked in to his eyes, tilted her head and leaned very slightly, that if he wasn't looking closely he might have missed the movement. He was acutely aware of how their hands have shifted. Her one hand was still on his cheek, which had became considerably warm whereas her other hand rested on his chest, he was sure she could feel his heart reverberating around his ribs. His own hands had shifted to her waist and he could feel her warm skin from the flimsy material of her top.

Was this the moment? But what will happen next when all the cards will be placed on the table? He was just thinking about it few minutes ago and he hadn't even decided what he will do. If he kissed her now he won't be able to take it back, what if he ruined her life? What if she will get trapped in his miserable life? All the question buzzed in his head, he saw her leaning further and her eyes fluttering closed and he panicked.

But his utter misfortune was that he panicked at the exact moment she had decided to cover the distance, but before her lips could have touch his lips, he had turned his head in a way that her lips landed a little away from the corner of his mouth.

Oh no!

He closed his eyes in dismay, this was not the way he had wanted as he heard her breath hitch, and felt her pulling away from his face slowly. He willed his head to turn and meet his eyes. He slowly gathered the courage, took a deep breath and turned towards her to see her eyes opening. What he saw there made his heart clench. Those beautiful big brown eyes were filled with hurt.

Oh my...

He was too dumbstruck to react, but he saw her blinking her eyes hard to keep the tears that were now welling up in her eyes, at bay, making her eyelashes wet. Her cheeks were coloring. His heart sank, this was the last thing he had wanted, she will probably think that he didn't wanted to kiss her where the truth was that he had yearned to do so, longer than he cared to admit. She slowly removed her hands from his face and chest, and her legs from his thighs, all the while avoiding looking in to his eyes. He felt a pang of remorse at the loss. He opened his mouth but no words came. Do something. He saw as she pulled herself away from his body and rose sharply from the sofa, turned around when he heard a tiny sob escape from her and she clapped a hand on her mouth to stifle the noise. This was enough to will him to make a move and he grabbed her wrist and pulled her down next to him. She wiped her tears hastily all the while turning her face away from him. He was resisting the urge to bang his head on the table when he cupped her face in both of his hands and forced her to face him, when she still was not looking him in the eyes he ducked his head and their eyes met.

Tears as big as pearls were running down her beautiful face and her eyes shone with unshed tears. It was both breathtaking and heartbreaking sight at once. Breathtaking because she looked uncommonly innocent and pure with tears in her wide eyes and heartbreaking because he hated seeing tears in her eyes and moreover because he was the cause of it.

He hasn't even done anything yet and she was already crying, he was already breaking her heart.

But probably she was crying because he hasn't done anything?

"Dora, I m sorry..." he said lamely, while trying to ignore the burden on his heart, why can't he think anything better to say? "I just panicked." wiped tears from her cheeks with his thumb, then stroking her wet cheekbones.

"Yeah I am probably that type of girl who makes people panic when they try to get too near" she said quietly and shakily and first he thought she was being sarcastic but the written sadness on her face told him otherwise. His heart sank further. He had made her doubt herself.

He took a deep breath. "No, Merlin no! You have no idea what you mean to me. No woman has ever made me feel the way you do. I just panicked.. Because.. Well... Do you know what it will mean? To be associated with me? With a werewolf?"

She frowned at him and he felt disappointment flood in him when a thought came into his mind that she probably has not considered the implications of being with the werewolf, she was just acting on pure feelings.

But then she proved him wrong by saying "I know Remus, what you mean, and trust me, I know the implications. People will not approve, but then since when I have paid any attention to people? If I would have then I would not have joined the Order in the first place, which is a threat to society in the eye of Ministry. My principles and my judgement will not be based on other people's opinion. I know the kind of man you are, gentle and kind, I couldn't care less about people." she said it with utmost sincerity and his heart went out for her, he was barely able to look away. He wanted to say that it won't be that easy, but he didn't wanted to make her feel as if he was trying to push her away. God knew, he was too weak for that.

So he questioned another problem."I am so poor, I will hardly be able to take you to expensive restaurants, hell, I won't even be able to take you to cheap restaurants, how will you feel then when you will want to go to a place that I hardly can afford?" he said feeling embarrassed because his financial position was one of the topics he hardly wanted to discus with the woman he loved.

"Remus, I don't want to be with you so you can feed me, I can manage that well enough on my own, even if I tend to burn my food sometimes. I don't care how poor or rich you are. I will be well content with just a stroll by street or you know... Sitting under the tree near the lake or something" She gestured vaguely with her hands flailing here and there "All I want is your company, it will be enough for a date. But if you don't want me..." she finished looking defeated.

How can I not want you?

It was true though that if any woman who couldn't care less about his money was Tonks.

"Don't ever doubt that. You know, I am really sorry I made you cry, as I said I just panicked while thinking that you may not understand the implications of being with me." he tried to muster all the sincerity in his tone and he was rewarded with a beautiful albeit little watery smile in return. He sighed and prayed that he hasn't ruined the moment.

Why am I still talking? It's time to do something.

He leaned forward and she closed her eyes in anticipation. He didn't wanted to look away from her face but his own eyes closed on their own accord. Ever so lightly his nose pressed in her cheek and he took in the breath let out by her and pressed his lips to hers tentatively. At once everything around them froze and he felt like he will faint from the sensation. His heart thudded violently with happiness. He started moving his lips tentatively over hers and his blood sang when she returned the kiss. He was so overwhelmed that he never wanted to let her go. He stroked her temple with his fingers while his other hand crept into her hairs, pressing her mouth more firmly against his. Her own hand tangled in his hair where, her other hand peeked a little under his shirt beneath his collar, caressing, making him shiver. He had no intention to stop but he wanted to gauge her reaction. He pulled away from her slowly.

He saw her opening her eyes, with shallow breathing, glow from the fire dancing in her brown orbs."For a moment there, I was afraid that may be you don't feel the same way about me." she whispered though happiness shone brightly in her eyes.

"How could I not? The moment I looked into your eyes first time I knew that I was lost and knew that I will never be the same again." he whispered back and hoped that it didn't sounded too corny or sappy because no matter what, it was the truth. She flashed him a dazzling smile and this time there was no stopping. This time when there lips met there was no tentativeness no hesitancy. Though they were gentle, desperation and all the hunger that were bottled up within them for all these months, was obvious from their movements. He pulled her flush against him while rubbing her back urging her forward with one hand and feeling the supple skin of her neck with other hand. The way she caressed his chest forced him to take a ragged breath. She pressed her tongue into his mouth boldly and their tongue met in a frenzied dance such that they both moaned. His tongue caressed her's and the sensation took his breath away. He pulled her up in his lap without breaking the kiss, where she straddled him, he didn't wanted even an inch of space between them. He pressed her to him, clung to her as if she was his lifeline. The way her now warm hands on his back, pulled him towards her, he knew she felt the same. His one hand managed to creep under her top and he felt the silky smooth skin of her bare waist. She moaned appreciatively when he caressed her bare back and he couldn't express the way she was making his body hum. He pulled away from her mouth to breathe but had no intention of letting her go, he didn't felt like even wasting a second. He kissed his way from back of her ear to her jaw, licking and nipping her skin lightly in the way making her shiver. He knew he was being fast and needy but Merlin knew he had waited too long.

"Remus.." she whispered while stroking his back.

"Uh huh" he replied while kissing her neck, apparently all words in English language forgotten. He kissed her pulse, grazing his teeth lightly and felt that he had never tasted something so glorious.

"I... want... to tell you.. something."she spoke with difficulty and his chest swelled at pride that he had brought her to this reluctantly pulled his lips away from her and looked into her eyes, shining with adoration for him and he fell in love with her all over again.

"Yes?" he replied panting and realized that she was out of breath as well. She looked like a dream, peace of his beautiful imagination, there sitting on his lap flushed against him, her pink hair now flecked all over with red, mussed and disheveled, her red lips puffy and wet from his kisses, little pink marks on her jaw and she had never looked more admirable, more adorable, more desirable that an 'awww' almost slipped from his mouth but he forced it back down his throat. He didn't wanted her to think that he was... girly... at this moment!

"That was the best snog of my life." she smirked wickedly taking his appearance and he knew he looked no better than her.

"I assure you the sentiment is mutual." he said while pressing a kiss to the corner of her mouth. He couldn't wrap his head around the idea that he finally was allowed to do so "You are intoxicating, you know that? I have wanted to do that to you the moment I set my eyes on you."

"Shame we wasted so much time then."

"Not anymore" he said huskily while lowering her to the sofa for another snog session.

After an hour of lots of snogging, groping and caressing, they lay on sofa together. He lay on his side holding Tonks who lay on her back. His head was on her shoulder for a change, he was tracing pattern on her stomach through her t-shirt and she was stroking his hairs, their limbs were tangled. Though there was a nagging worry behind his mind that this will be painful in future especially for her, he pushed aside the worry for their sake, after all how many times did he get in his life to be in the arms of the woman he loved? Who by some miracle reciprocated his feelings, though up to what extent he was still unaware and he didn't feel like breaking the peaceful aura that once again had settled around them. He can't remember when was the last time he was so happy, though it scared him like hell because his past was proof that whenever he had been happy, the reason for his joy has been snatched away from him. But right now, all that mattered was that she was by her side, igniting his soul and he can't remember the last time he had felt so alive. Until now he was only surviving but now he felt like living his life, with her. With that thought he snuggled closer to her, kissed her collarbone delicately and inhaled her scent feeling her heartbeat and her chest rising & falling in rhythm, she in return, kissed his forehead. He knew that if their was heaven anywhere on earth, it was here, in her arms.

He was home. Finally.

A/N - so what do you feel about this chapter? Enough fluff to keep you bouncing? How do you feel about their snogging session? *blush* *blush* It was my first time writing something like this. Please review and if you feel like please 'favorite' and 'follow' the story. Next chapter will be up soon, within a week probably.