Slow Burn

A/N: Spoilers for Extreme Prejudice. This chapter is set after they thought Dearing was dead… the first time. Many thanks for all the reviews – including the guest ones which FFnet won't let me reply to directly; every one is appreciated. And anyone would think I was having fun making you all wait for something to happen…

Chapter 9 – Light the Blue Touch Paper

Tony stood with Abby by Gibbs' desk, listening, along with the rest of the bullpen, to Vance finishing his announcement that Dearing was dead… laid out on an autopsy table below decks right now.

With Fornell beside him, Vance wound up, thanking everyone for their hard work and Tony exchanged glances with Tim and Ziva, who was perched on McGee's desk. As everyone began to disperse, the buzz of relief was palpable that the hunt for this guy who'd haunted them for months was finally over.

Tony watched the Director move along the upper deck in the direction of his office for a moment before turning back to Gibbs.

"That's it then. Who'd have thought it would be over so quick and easy in the end." He caught Gibbs' look and held up his hands. "Well, okay, not easy as in easy but after this week and all this build up, it seems almost an anti-climax now that we've got him. But maybe we can get back to normal… whatever passes for normal around here."

Gibbs nodded. "Guess so, DiNozzo."

Tony looked over at Abby, who was biting her lip and looking thoughtful. "What's up with you two? I mean there's no doubt it's him, is there? Nothing's hinky?"

Abby shrugged. "50% DNA match."

"Well, considering he must be a crispy critter, that's not surprising, is it?" Tony glanced back at Gibbs but his expression was impassive.

"No, it isn't, Tony," Abby agreed. "We've worked with a lot less and still gotten IDs that stood up in court."

"In Israel, we sometimes had to be content with an identification from a small scrap of tissue," Ziva reminded them.

Tony held Gibbs' gaze, trying to read his expression. "But it's not as… satisfying as being able to look the guy in the eye as you take him down and really know you've got him, am I right or am I right?"

Gibbs tilted his head in acknowledgement. "Yeah… somethin' like that."

"I guess we have to go with what we've got," McGee commented as he turned back to his desk. "It's over… that's the main thing, isn't it?"

"Guess it is. Okay, guys. I got other… stuff to do." Abby turned away only to be stopped by Gibbs' voice.

"Abbs." He waited till she turned. "Any of that stuff urgent?"

"Well, no, Gibbs but…"

Gibbs shook his head, cutting her off. "No buts… Go." He let his gaze run over the three agents. "You too. Paperwork can wait till tomorrow. You all look exhausted. Go home."

Tony stared at Gibbs, momentarily surprised, but McGee and Ziva didn't need telling twice and began gathering up their gear. With a wide smile on her face, Abby ran over to hug Gibbs, reaching up to kiss him on the cheek.

Abby giggled when she pulled back, wiping at the smudge of lipstick she'd planted on his cheek. "This is why it's probably better the other way round. You don't leave lipstick on my cheek. Well," Abby grinned as she teased. "Almost never. There was that one time."

Gibbs fought a smile, tilting his head. "Go."

"Yes, Sir." Abby threw Gibbs a sloppy salute and when he raised an eyebrow, her grin widened. "Ma'am."

As Abby turned, Tony tilted his head, pointing at his cheek. "Plant one, Abbs. I don't mind being covered in lipstick."

Abby smiled, leaning in to press her lips to his cheek. "Yeah, I heard that about you, Tony." She threw her arms round his neck for a hug and whispered in his ear. "Go for it."

"Abbs, behave," Tony muttered as he returned her hug and she pulled back with an unrepentant grin on her face, waggling her eyebrows with her back to Gibbs.

Oblivious to the byplay for once, Gibbs shook his head, amusement lacing his voice. "Get outta here, the pair of ya."

"Alright, alright… I'm going, I'm going." She waved her hands, backing away and grinning at them. "You two do whatever it is you were gonna do tonight. Night, guys."

As McGee and Ziva left too, Tony began closing down his own computer and gathering up his belongings.

Gibbs sat down, a smile tugging at his mouth as he watched Abby leave. "You two oughta be on the stage as a double act."

Tony smiled. "Nice to know we've got an alternative career when you finally fire me then."

Gibbs smirked, pointing at his cheek. "You've got…"

"Oh, right… Thanks." Tony scrubbed at his cheek. "Got it?" When Gibbs nodded, he asked, "You're not gonna stay, are you? That 'you look exhausted' comment applies to you too, y'know. Be honest… is there anything that can't wait till another day, Boss?"

Gibbs eyed the paperwork on his desk before shaking his head ruefully. "Maybe not."

"Well, there you go then… for once, follow your own advice and go home."

Gibbs shot him a look. "Maybe."

"C'mon, you know it makes sense… Basement?"

Gibbs nodded before countering, "Piano?"

"Yeah, I thought I might. Seems like a while since I had some time at home just to hang, y'know." Tony hefted his backpack onto his shoulder. He moved over to stand in front of Gibbs' desk, trying to suppress an attack of nerves. "You, er… if you feel like some company later, just come on over… I'll order enough takeout for us both and if you don't make it, I'll, er, have it reheated tomorrow… which is another bad habit I've picked up from you, by the way."

Gibbs gazed at him for a moment before nodding. "Okay… Thanks."

"I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to… you probably want some time on your own too… I just thought…"

Gibbs rolled his eyes at the rambling. "Okay… I got it. Go."

Gibbs paused outside Tony's apartment door. He could hear the piano playing through the closed door and leaned against the wall, listening to the soothing sound for a few moments.

On the way over, he'd tried working it through in his head why he'd been so restless again tonight; why he had no appetite for his basement for once and why he couldn't settle to reading or watching a game.

He was no nearer an answer that didn't start to freak him out than when he'd started the car to drive over here.

Even without a specific invite, usually neither of them needed to think twice about going to the other's home. It wasn't unusual for Tony to just turn up at his house unannounced or for Gibbs to just head on over to Tony's apartment if he knew the guy didn't have any plans.

So why did he feel antsy and nervous?

Why did tonight feel different from all the other times?

The piano stopped and Gibbs shook himself out of his thoughts, raising his hand to knock, and he waited a few moments before he heard Tony approaching, talking to himself.

"Well, that's fast even for that place." The door opened and Tony looked momentarily surprised before a big smile spread across his face. "Y'know, I really gotta tell that Chinese place that one of their delivery boys looks just like my boss."

Gibbs rolled his eyes, a grin tugging at his mouth. "Looks like I forgot the food."

"That's no tip for you then."

At that moment, the real delivery boy appeared at the end of the hallway and Tony grinned at Gibbs. "Now he looks nothing like you but he has got the food at least, so that's a bonus straight away… and it's still fast." He jerked his head. "I got this. You go on in."

As Gibbs moved past him into the apartment, Tony headed down the hallway to intercept the delivery of their food. When he returned laden down with bags, Gibbs was standing at his window, gazing out at the darkened city.

Tony noted the preoccupied expression on Gibbs' face as he headed for the kitchen. As he began unpacking the bags, Tony called out. "Basement not cutting it?"

"Stairs were empty," Gibbs muttered before he could stop himself.

Tony's head popped around the kitchen archway. "Say again?"

Gibbs shook his head and Tony disappeared back into the kitchen. Gibbs huffed a breath, relieved the younger man hadn't heard that comment as he wasn't sure he could explain it to himself, let alone Tony.

It was like several instances over the past few weeks, when he'd realized Tony's presence somehow helped him feel grounded… either in person or on the phone, as it had been on the evening of the bombing.

It was disconcerting that he'd felt more comfortable and at ease with Tony than he had with Ryan recently; although with her never ending mind games, maybe it wasn't such a mystery and was hardly a fair comparison.

Tony accepted him for who he was.

Didn't try to change him. Didn't play mind games the way Ryan had. And he didn't have to watch every single thing he said like he'd ended up doing with Ryan.

He could be himself.

Tony also had a seemingly unshakeable faith in him which was humbling at times, and Gibbs felt he didn't always deserve. But it made him want to make the effort not to disappoint the younger man.

Gibbs was jolted out of his thoughts as Tony brought the food through, dumping a couple of bottles of beer on the table. "There you go. Make a start. I just gotta feed Kate… ladies first. Hope you said hi as you came in… she'll only sulk if you didn't."

Tony grinned as Gibbs rolled his eyes. By the time he'd fed his goldfish, Gibbs had distributed their food and opened the beer, settling on the couch. As they ate, they talked about wrapping up the case and the latest on Ducky and updates on injured colleagues in the hospital.

"Have we had any details of the funerals yet?" Tony asked.

Gibbs sighed. "Not yet… Vance'll make sure we know, for those being buried here. I think for some, the families are taking them home."

"I dropped by the hospital on the way home. So many to see, I feel like doing it in shifts… popped in to see Nikki." Tony dug around in his carton. "I'm not sure what she was freaking out about more, breaking her leg or the fact that she was stuck in a germ ridden hospital for a few days more. I think Probie's gonna visit Susan tomorrow."

"How's she doing?"

"Okay, I think… her back's pretty cut up by flying glass but they say she'll be fine. Y'know the real irony? If she'd still been in her office, she'd have been okay… she was outside when it blew."

"I'll drop by tomorrow now we've got more time… do the rounds of everyone." Gibbs paused. "Vance said Agent Adams didn't make it."

Tony grimaced. "Aw, hell… not another one. He had two kids, didn't he?" Gibbs nodded and Tony went on. "Damn… and Midge is still missing, isn't she?"

"Yup. All they know is she left the building."

"And vanished into thin air. A bit like Matt Damon in The Bourne Identity, although Midge was hardly an assassin with multiple passports and not quite like Harrison Ford in Regarding Henry coz while he lost his memory, he didn't actually disappear."

Gibbs considered for a moment. "I remember that one… second wife liked Harrison Ford. Come to think of it, all of 'em did."

"Wow… you making a movie reference. Stop the world, I wanna get off," Tony teased and Gibbs reached over to try to steal some of Tony's food, who laughingly batted his chopsticks away as he leaned back out of reach.

As they ate, Tony surreptitiously studied Gibbs, seeing the tension gradually seep from his shoulders but he could still sense his distraction. The Marine hadn't eaten nearly as much as he usually did, even of his favourite dish which Tony had ordered, and was now just picking over the remains of one carton without much enthusiasm.

"You organized the insurance guy for your truck yet? Kinda symbolic your truck protected both my car and Abby's. A bit like you do with all of us anyway."

Gibbs' truck had taken a direct hit from some of the debris from the explosion and wasn't repairable. His bigger vehicle had protected Abby's hot rod and Tony's car had also escaped damage for once, which, given his track record with cars, was a welcome surprise.

Gibbs nodded. "Coming over tomorrow."

"It's totalled though, right?"

"Yeah."

"That's a shame." Tony waved his chopsticks as a thought struck him. "You gonna get the same kinda truck?"

Gibbs shrugged. "Hadn't thought about it yet. Imagine so. Works for me."

"Aw, Gibbs… there's so many cool trucks out there." Tony grinned as he was on the receiving end of a look. "Don't look at me like that, you know I'm right."

"It's a truck, Tony." Gibbs nodded towards the piano. "Heard you playing when I got here. Haven't heard that in a while."

Tony followed Gibbs' glance. "No… we haven't exactly had much time lately, have we? I've missed playing."

"It sounded good."

Tony gave him a pleased smile. "I can play again if you want."

When Gibbs came over to his apartment and either there wasn't a game on or Tony couldn't persuade Gibbs to watch a movie, or Tony simply needed to get his own head on straight, he often played while Gibbs stretched out on his couch. The Marine would sometimes bring a book to read or just simply relax and would often end up drifting off to sleep.

Tony loved those quiet evenings, when he could play and let his own mind drift while sneaking glances at Gibbs lying there on his couch, looking so at home in his space… which was just how comfortable Tony felt at Gibbs' own house.

It was an image he'd give his right arm to have in his life as something more than friends.

"I'd like that."

"I'll even take requests." Tony teased with a smile.

Gibbs snorted, reaching for his beer before a thought struck him. "But if you need some space, I can leave you to it."

Tony shook his head. "No need. Could do with some company myself. It was good being with Abby the other night but last night on my own… well, last night sucked. Couldn't seem to settle to anything."

Gibbs looked at him, concerned. "Nightmares?"

"Not so much that, just…" Tony shrugged, not sure how to explain his restlessness. "Well, it would have been just nice to have someone to talk to, I guess… someone who understands what we went through, and I think Abby's struggling to come to terms with it herself, so I didn't wanna burden her anymore… and I knew you were busy."

Gibbs stared at him seriously. "Never too busy if you need to talk, Tony… or even if you don't wanna talk."

"Thanks, Jethro…" Tony shot him a rueful smile. "I should know that by now, shouldn't I?"

"Yeah, you should." Gibbs began gathering up the debris from the takeout. "I'll take care of this." He nodded toward the piano. "You. Play."

"On it, Boss." Tony grinned widely before settling himself at the piano and beginning to pick out a soft jazz tune, something that he could just float along with and not concentrate on too much. He could hear Gibbs in the kitchen and found himself relaxing into the familiarity of the scene.

It felt like a welcome respite from all the craziness of the past weeks… and despite the worry over injured co-workers, a string of funerals to attend and repairs to the building to work around, moments like this were something to be treasured.

Tony looked up as Gibbs returned from the kitchen carrying two mugs, putting Tony's within reach on the coffee table.

Gibbs sipped his coffee for a while, a small smile on his face as he listened to Tony playing. It wasn't long before he stretched out on the couch, resting his head against the armrest and closing his eyes and Tony risked more glances his way, soaking up the Marine's presence.

Tony eventually broke the silence, but didn't pause in his playing. "So… are there any loose ends left over from Dearing we should be thinking about? Well, apart from Midge disappearing… anything case related to follow up tomorrow?"

"Nope."

Tony looked Gibbs over carefully before asking. "What about what happened with Dr Ryan's ex-husband? He's still out of jail, right? And I presume she and Parker will have to stay in hiding until he's dealt with? You gonna try and help her with that?"

Gibbs opened his eyes, staring at Tony for a long moment before shaking his head.

"She didn't ask you to help, did she?" Tony took a guess.

Gibbs didn't answer the question directly but it was answer enough. "Haven't spoken to her."

Tony frowned, letting his fingers still on the keys. "And she hasn't called you either, has she?"

Gibbs shook his head, looking away.

His earlier disappointment that Ryan had chosen to run instead of letting him help was now combined with hurt that she hadn't made contact with him after the bombing.

Gibbs figured she could probably find out easily enough that he wasn't on the casualty list, but the fact that she didn't seem to want to talk to him… that hurt, however much he tried to ignore it.

But it also told him how little Ryan was invested in their relationship.

And Gibbs was so tired of the way she blew hot and cold towards him that Gibbs was beginning to feel more relieved than anything else that he didn't have to deal with her in this immediate aftermath of the bombing.

There was a certain irony to be on the receiving end of being shut out of a relationship when he was usually the one doing the retreating.

It wasn't a comfortable feeling to experience a taste of his own medicine.

Tony watched Gibbs as he made a conscious effort to bring his face under control. If he didn't know the guy so well, it would have been tough to read him but Tony could see the subtle play of emotions passing fleetingly across his face.

Tony felt anger rise up at the thought that Ryan hadn't even made an effort to make contact with a man she supposedly cared about, even just to see if he was okay.

It wasn't the action of a woman who had Gibbs' six.

Even if Ryan couldn't risk direct contact, five minutes on a burn phone would at least have sent a message to Gibbs that she was thinking about him. After all, it's not every day your lover nearly gets blown up on the same day you decide to skip town.

If she'd cared at all about Gibbs, she'd have found a way.

He would have.

He'd have moved heaven and earth just to speak to the guy.

"Well… maybe she found out you were okay through… someone else."

As much as it stuck in his throat to try to be fair to Ryan, his main concern was to try to reassure Gibbs, but the older man merely shrugged. Tony wasn't sure what else to say and in the end just asked, "So you don't know when she'll be back?"

Gibbs shook his head. "No idea."

"I'm sorry, Jethro… I don't like to think your relationship has been affected by Dearing's manipulation."

Gibbs rubbed the back of his neck. "He only speeded up the inevitable, Tony."

"Oh…"

That was unexpected.

"But she will be back eventually, won't she?" Tony went on, cautiously feeling his way. "I mean, even though she's not here now, you're still together, right? Okay, you could be apart for months, I get that but it doesn't mean it's over over… does it?"

Gibbs shook his head, swinging his legs off the couch and sitting up, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. "We're done."

It was only when he said it out loud that Gibbs accepted it as the truth.

He was done with the games.

Tony stared at him. "Then I'm doubly sorry. I don't like to see you get hurt."

Gibbs looked down at his clasped hands for a moment and his voice was so quiet, Tony had to strain to hear him. "They all leave… in the end."

"I wouldn't."

The words were out of his mouth before Tony could stop them and he froze, wide eyed, when he realized what he'd said.

Holy shit, did I really say that out loud?

TBC…