Obligatory Disclaimer: The "Inu Yasha" series and its characters are the property of Rumiko Takahashi, Sunrise, Shounen Sunday, Viz, and other corporate types. I am none of those entities. I'm just a silly fan writing silly stories because it's fun. Suing me would only be a waste of time and funds, so please don't.

I CHOOSE NOT TO WARN!

This story contains material that might be disturbing or outright triggering to some. Reader discretion advised.

Seed of Memory
By Misarae

Chapter Five
Letting Go

She just couldn't take it anymore.

Kagome's powers were back at their full strength, so they'd all set out two days ago to retrace their steps and try to find Naraku's current hiding place. They'd all been slightly on edge, but without the scent of birds leading them, it was more anticipation than anything else. They'd slain a few random youkai along the way who challenged them for the shikon no tama, but they were mostly low level. The only one that had given them trouble was a mountain ogre. Between its size and the thickness of its hide, it had been a struggle, but one that ultimately ended in victory.

What had thrown Kagome over the edge was when Inu Yasha came over to inspect her once the ogre was in about a dozen pieces. Kagome had been caught in the ogre's hand for a bit, and he'd squeezed her tight, bruising but not cracking her ribs. The look in Inu Yasha's eyes as he sniffed her, making sure she wasn't fibbing about her condition, pierced her heart.

Oh, he was still rude and crude, but there was a gentleness and care to his actions that was heartwrenching.

If they'd come from a place of true trust and maturity, Kagome would have been thrilled, but being fully aware that it was due to an enchantment, a dream of what could have been, broke her a little every time he did something uncharacteristically nice.

Which was why she was out in the forest in the dead of night. They were very close to the waterfall and the last place she'd seen Kikyou. Kaede had given her the idea of actually tracking Kikyou down by searching for her power signature. Kagome shook her head at the role reversal. Normally it would have been Inu Yasha making this trek.

Eventually, Kagome caught sight of something very familiar. A glowing, silvery serpent slipped through the night air, carrying a shining ball of light that could only be the soul of yet another recently deceased maiden.

Kikyou had to be nearby.

Kagome actually stumbled a bit when she came to a clearing, Kikyou sitting propped against a tree with her two shikigami tending her. Kagome had to admit that Kikyou actually looked better than she had since the moment of her resurrection. There was a touch of color to her pale skin, though it was obvious she was still weak.

"Have a change of heart about saving me?" Kikyou inquired, breaking the silence.

Kagome came closer, but not too close, keeping a wary eye on the Shinidamachu floating in the air. "No, I've actually come for your herbal expertise."

Kikyou tilted her head slightly, something Kagome had never seen in the usually stoic undead miko.

"I need the antidote to whatever you put in those umeboshi."

Kikyou's features smoothed out into utter tranquility, and Kagome was struck once again by a similarity between Kikyou and Inu Yasha. Inu Yasha blustered and grumped. Kikyou went eerily calm. "Why would you ever want that?"

Kagome shook her head. "This isn't right, Kikyou, and I think deep down, you know it, too," Kagome said. "You're not doing anyone any favors by erasing yourself from Inu Yasha's life."

Kikyou gave a ladylike snort. "I am doing myself a favor. I don't need a useless puppy trailing after me all the time."

"You and Inu Yasha really are alike!"

Kikyou's eyes widened a bit.

"Someone hits too close to home, and you go on the defensive, saying hurtful things you don't really mean," Kagome continued. "I've spent the better part of a year with him. The Inu Yasha he's been since he ate those umeboshi is not the Inu Yasha I know and love."

"Isn't it easier to love him this way?" Kikyou countered. "No doubts, no shadow over him from my existence. He is free to be the man he would have been if he'd known you first."

Kagome's fists clenched. "I won't deny it. It is easier," she said, before meeting Kikyou's cool gaze with a fiery one of her own, "but I love Inu Yasha for who he is, scars, flaws, and all. It's easy to love perfection, but if there's one thing I have learned, it's that true love isn't easy."

Kikyou's mask fell, revealing her shock.

Kagome's lips twisted into a self-depreciating smile. "You and Inu Yasha never had the chance to learn that before Naraku turned you against each other. I've had the benefit of time and traveling in his company. There's rarely been a day when he hasn't been by my side. He drives me crazy most of the time, but that's part and parcel. We're both stubborn and hot tempered, but that's okay. Yes, I get angry and sad when he goes to see you, but I understand. Who wouldn't, knowing how much he suffers? How guilty he feels that he wasn't able to protect you, over and over again. I may not like it, but I understand it."

"So you saved me for Inu Yasha's sake," Kikyou said, her features smooth once more.

"I told you the truth back then, and you know it," Kagome insisted. "Why can't you believe me?"

"I do believe you, and that is what puzzles me. Nobody does something for nothing."

Kagome took a deep breath. "I believe that everyone with even a speck of good in them deserves a chance to live," she said firmly. "Human, youkai, hanyou, or undead. Do I like that you take the souls of young girls to fuel your body? No. Do I like that Inu Yasha is constantly conflicted because you're still walking around? No. Do I think that despite all that you should have a chance at whatever life you can make for yourself?" Kagome paused for emphasis. "Yes.

"Just because I won't give up my own soul doesn't mean I want you to die. The soul I currently have is and always has been mine. I don't begrudge you your piece. Not anymore."

"You did once, though."

"I am still human, y'know. I'm no saint." Kagome smiled a bit at her own joke, knowing her point had been made.

Kikyou nodded, a ghostly echo of Kagome's smile gracing her own lips. "That you are not."

The two of them let a few heartbeats of silence pass before continuing their discussion.

"So, will you tell me the antidote?"

Kikyou sighed. "I will do you one better." She reached into a fold of her haori and pulled out a vial. "Add this to something Inu Yasha is about to eat or drink, and it will reverse the effects."

"You had it all along?"

"I think, perhaps, on the deepest level, I had a feeling that you would not accept my gift."

Kagome frowned. "Inu Yasha is a person, not a thing. The only one who has any right to make decisions for him is himself!"

"Once again, you are right. All the more reason that, if he does not choose you in the end, he is a fool."

Kagome stopped her forward movements, shocked. "What about dragging him to hell?"

Kikyou's tone filled with what could only be called regret. "I was hurt and angry. Even when I discovered that it was Naraku who killed me, I still wanted Inu Yasha to pay. He was a much easier and familiar target, you see. I.. apologize for my actions back then."

"You should apologize to Inu Yasha, not me," Kagome said, carefully taking the vial.

"I know," Kikyou said with a nod. "Perhaps, one day, I will have that chance."

"You're a good person, Kikyou. I hope you know that."

Kikyou's lips lifted in a half smile, placing a hand over where her heart would be. "Your influence, I think."

Kagome grinned. "It's been there all along. You came before I did, after all."

"KAGOME!"

Kagome jumped back, slipping the vial into her skirt pocket as Inu Yasha landed in front of her, baring his fangs at Kikyou. Kagome took a deep breath, biting back the "Osuwari" that threatened to roll off her tongue, opting instead for placing a hand on his shoulder.

"She means me no harm, Inu Yasha. I sought her out."

Inu Yasha turned his head slightly to gauge the truth of her words. "She stinks of grave soil. How do you know she isn't trying to trick you?"

Kagome exchanged a quick look with Kikyou, who nodded. "This is the woman they call Saint Hijiri."

Inu Yasha's brows knit. "You're the one who's been protecting people from Princess Abi?"

"Yes, indeed I am," Kikyou said.

"So why did you come out here to meet her?" Inu Yasha asked, looking back at Kagome.

"I needed some advice from somebody more experienced in using their spiritual powers."

Inu Yasha snorted. "You do just fine on your own," he said a bit roughly, before his expression turned into something more tender. "Did you find your answers?"

"Yes, I did," Kagome said, then stepped around Inu Yasha to bow to Kikyou. "Thank you for your insights."

"It was the least I could do," Kikyou replied.

"C'mon, then, Kagome. And this time you're riding on my back! Do you KNOW how many hungry youkai could've had you for a midnight snack?"

The couple bickered until they were out of sight, and Kikyou slumped back a bit further against the tree.

"Kikyou-sama?"

Kikyou looked at her two shikigami, who had drifted around to the other side of the tree during her and Kagome's conversation. "I require rest."

Asuka and Kochou nodded, settling in, one on either side of her.

"If only I had been allowed this pleasure in life," Kikyou thought.

Author's Note: As I said before, I'm not a huge Kikyou fan, but this scene just flowed very naturally for me. IY/Kag is my OTP, hands down, but even a rabid shipper like myself cannot deny Kikyou's influence on Inu Yasha's past. When I was younger, I hated Kikyou flat out, but as I've gotten older, I've come to see how tragic the whole thing really is. And now I'm rambling on like I'm an old lady or something. :p

I am still overjoyed and overwhelmed by the continued response to this. Thank you so much, everyone!