It has been a few weeks since the Varia first moved into Jalen's house. There have been fires, broken windows, and neighbors running to his house, but look at what happened today.
Jalen was asleep in his room, moaning and turning in his sleep. Bel was also asleep in the room across from Jalen, laughing and throwing knives around in his sleep. Suddenly, Lussuria burst in Jalen's room and turned on the lights.
"WAKEY WAKEY! IT'S 1:30pm! Kids shouldn't sleep past 12:00, so I kind of gave you a hour and 30 minutes extra!" Lussuria grabbed Jalen's sheets and threw them across the room, then opened up the blinds, letting in the sun.
"AHHHH! LUSSURIA! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"
Cue pillow in Lussuria's face.
"Awww... so cute... you should always stay in your 12 year old form..."
"Lussuria," Jalen sighed as he yawned, which sounded weird, "I just want 30 more minutes. Go... bother Bel..."
"Shishi~ too late~" Bel said creepily, knives shining in his hands.
"Oh look, you just had to wake up Bel-chan. He probably didn't finish his bloody dream, and is now ticked off," Lussuria sighed, and ran in Jalen's closet.
"Hey! Um... good morning, Bel-sempai," Jalen bowed politely. Bel laughed and threw a knife at Jalen's head.
...
"AUUUUUUUGH! STOP THE BLEEDING! MOMMY, HELP ME!" Jalen ran all around his room, his arms flailing around, and blood spurting out of his head. Bel laughed again, before walking out.
"Never wake the Prince again, if you know whats good for you, shishi~," Bel said, and shut the door to his room. Jalen grabbed a towel hanging on his wall and wiped the blood off of his head. He sighed and laid on the floor.
If only I was in my 25 year old form, I could handle him...
Jalen sighed again and closed his eyes. It takes a lot of energy to go into that form, and he used most of it during that fight a few weeks ago...
He can only go into that form about once a week now, but he could go into it more if he got more sleep...
"But would you be able to sleep peacefully with a bunch of assassins living with you?" Jalen asked out loud accidentally.
"Yep, and its not all that hard," Lussuria answered, suddenly sitting beside Jalen, "You just have to understand everyone here has something different about them that makes them unique. You just have to not act scared, act strong and pissed off. Act kind or nervously cute. If you find something about you that makes you different from the rest, you'll be unique in your own way..."
Jalen nodded slightly, and soon stood up and grinned.
"I know what I have to do! Thanks, Lussuria!" Jalen gave a peace sign and ran out the room. Lussuria smiled gently, before sweat dropping.
"I was trying to help him, but I just started rambling... I hope he'll be okay..."
"VOOOOOIIII! PUT ON SOME CLOTHES, BRAT!"
"How dare you get in front of the boss looking like that!"
"Um, he's wearing a t-shirt and pajama pants, he isn't exactly nude."
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The Varia were all in Jalen's living room, looking at TV. They never really did this at Varia, so they didn't really know what they were looking at.
"Pikachu, blast Team Rocket away!"
"Ahhhh! Team Rocket is blasting off again!"
The Varia all looked at this in mix emotion.
"VOOOOOIIIII! THOSE STUPID TWERPS! IF I WAS TEAM ROCKET I COULD EASILY STEAL THAT PIKACHU!" Squalo hollered, swinging his sword back and forth.
"Ash Ketchum looks so kawaii~. I would love to have a Pokemon Battle with him~" Lussuria blew kisses at the TV screen, shaking his butt.
"Do you ever wonder if kids are listening to you, Lussuria-sempai?" Fran asked in monotone, completely ignoring the TV.
"Shishi~, I would be the boss of Team Rocket," Bel played with a knife in his hands, "We would kill all of the peasant trainers with Knife Pokemon."
"Hmph, Boss would be the Boss Of Team Rocket, and I would be 2nd in command," Levi said proudly. Jalen felt a vein pop.
"Shut up, Levi-a-thon!" Jalen yelled, making sure to say Levi's full name.
"What? But, I didn't do anything!" Levi yelled in defense, standing up. Jalen stood up too, and pointed straight in Levi's face.
"Just you being inside of my house is enough to make me throw up! You talking is making me want to drown myself in boiling water, lava even!"
"Just jumping in lava is enough to kill you, you don't need to go to the extra mile and drown yourself in lava."
"If you weren't apart of the Varia, I swear I would have killed you in your sleep!" Jalen yelled, getting in front of the TV.
"Scum, get out the wa-"
"Wait a minute, Xanxus! You all need to know this! Fran told me this, so he can leave!"
Fran said, "Arigatou," and left the house in a hurry.
"Levi... I always suspected you of this as soon as I met you, but I didn't know you would actually do it," Jalen took a deep breath and pointed a Levi, "You were that evil, perverted old man that raped those 2 little kids and left them in the dumpster!"
Everyone was silent, until Bel jumped out the window, Lussuria ran out the door back door, and Squalo grabbed Jalen and ran for the front door. Levi was too stunned to move, and it's a shame he didn't.
Xanxus' scream of fury and Levi's high-pitched scream was all you heard before the house was destroyed.
Jalen looked at his house in horror, before Squalo said in a irritated tone, "Never cut off Xanxus when he's talking. Never."
Jalen looked at Squalo, then back at his burning house, and did a little prayer.
For his laptop.
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Varia Chat
Jalen has entered the chat.
Top Magician has entered the chat.
Jalen: Hi Fran.
Top Magician: Hi Jalen. What are you doing on the chat alone? Do you not have a life?
Jalen: You're on too! Do you not have a life?!
Top Magician: I have a life, I'm just bored.
Jalen: Don't you think maybe I'M bored too?!
Top Magician: No.
pRince The RiPper has entered the chat.
pRince The RiPper: wassup stuid pesants hoo hav no lif
Top Magician: Fake Prince-sempai, there are many things wrong with what you just typed. Your username is grammatically incorrect and didn't you mean 'what's up?' not 'wassup'? You call us stupid, but you can't even spell stupid. Doesn't that make you stupid? You also can't spell peasant, and you're a fake prince so you can't really call us 'pesants'. 'Who' is not spelled like 'hoo', 'Have' is not spelled like 'hav', and 'Life' is not spelled like 'lif'. So, did you mean, 'What's up stupid peasants who have no life'?
pRince The RiPper has lost connection.
Jalen: I heard a crash in Bel's room, you better run Fran.
Top Magician: Oh, I used an illusion to make it seem like you typed it and not me...so... yeah.
Jalen has lost connection.
Top Magician: Review and tell the author how you like this story so far, and Jalen is getting his Varia Uniform and Box Weapon next Chapter, so keep reading. Also, if you like Gintama then be happy cause the author is writing a Gintama story. If you don't like Gintama then go and watch it because it is the Best Anime Ever... And even if you just start watching it you can still read it because... well... you'll see. Why am I saying this for you again?
Author-sama has logged on.
Author-sama: I am soo sorry! I know this chapter is short and kind of pointless, but the next chapter will develop to the storyline, I promise! Anyway, I hope you like it.
Top Magician and Author-sama: Bye nii!
Top Magician:...Can I go watch Bel-sempai kill Jalen now?
Author-sama: After this, Fran... After this...