"I… I don't understand why you did that, Sebastian," Trent admitted as the car sped along. The ambulance was out of sight, but Kurt thought that that was good. The sooner Blaine got to the hospital the better.

"You tried to convince Blaine to take them," Jeff said. "Why try so hard so he doesn't? Hunter would have thrown you out."

"I – I don't know really. I was thinking about how – how lost Blaine looked. And how he used to be. And I thought that he would hate himself if he actually took them because it was against all the morals that I knew he had. And I couldn't let him do that."

Jeff scoffed.

"You should have just convinced him not to. Sebastian, if you cared, then why did Blaine still collapse after he drank some water because he thought it was steroids? Why are we going to the hospital?" Jeff's voice got progressively louder as he spoke.

"Jeff," Trent warned. "Jeff! It's not his fault. It's not anyone's fault. It's everyone's. We could have all done more, but we can't change that. We just have to be there for Blaine now."

"I agree," Kurt found himself saying. He swallowed hard.

Kurt felt grateful that Sebastian had been able to keep Blaine from actually taking the drugs, albeit through a very twisted method.

"Thank you, Sebastian," Kurt said, his voice only a whisper.

"I – you're welcome," Sebastian said, looking surprised. "But I really didn't do anything."

"You kept Blaine from ruining his future. Honestly, you did the most to help out of anyone here. You actually accomplished something. The rest of us indirectly influenced him to take the drugs," Kurt said.

"But I've also done the most harm, too. Maybe if I was a good leader, then Hunter wouldn't be leading the Warblers now."

"We can all say something like that. I could say that if I never met Blaine, then this wouldn't happen," Kurt said.

"And I could say that if I didn't convince Blaine to try out for the Warblers, then this wouldn't have happened," Trent added.

"You're right," Sebastian with a small smile. "Thank you."

Kurt had a second to realize that he was sitting with one of his biggest enemies – and his competition for Blaine, if Sebastian could be called that. Now, he was sitting there being completely civil to Sebastian and other Warblers he hadn't spoken to since Blaine had been nearly blinded.

It was insane how what had happened seemed to change so much.

At one time it had been a sign of madness to believe that the Earth goes round the Sun; today, to believe the past is inalterable. He might be alone in holding that belief, and if alone, then a lunatic.

Why had Sebastian's hate affected him so much before? It didn't seem to matter that much anymore.

He was a lonely ghost uttering a truth that nobody would ever hear.

Perhaps that was how Blaine had seen it. He'd certainly forgiven the Warblers long before Kurt could even think about them. Kurt, of all people, should have known that hate was going to come from many places, and that one couldn't let it touch them.

We are the dead. Our only true life is in the future.

But Sebastian didn't really hate them, did he? He had done more for Blaine than anyone else. Sebastian had stopped Blaine from making a terrible decision.

Until they become conscious, they will never rebel

No, that wasn't right. He had stopped Blaine from having consequences of that one decision. Well, some of the consequences.

The consequences of every act are included in the act itself.

He hadn't been lying when he told Sebastian that he thought Sebastian was the only one that actually did something helpful for Blaine.

Trent had gotten angry.

No emotion was pure, because everything was mixed up with fear and hatred.

Jeff was part of the crowd of Warblers that were peer-pressuring him into it.

In moments of crisis one is never fighting against an external enemy but always against one's own body.

Kurt had been one of the factors that really caused him to consider it. Blaine thought that Kurt would hate him for not rushing back into a relationship.

The words kept coming back to him, statement of a mystical truth and a palpable absurdity.

And well, for a moment, Kurt did hate him. But, knowing his reasons, he thought it was a good decision. As much as he wanted to get back together with Blaine, he didn't want to be hurt, and Blaine was confused.

Now he had recognized himself as a dead man it became important to stay alive as long as possible.

Thinking about (though it seemed too late now) it, he would rather Blaine work it out. And well… he'd wait for Blaine. Forever, if he had to.

Nothing was your own except the few cubic centimeters in your skull.

Because Kurt loved Blaine.

If you loved someone, you loved him, and when you had nothing else to give, you still gave him love.

And he supported him. Even if that meant telling him it was okay to not return Kurt's love.

The members of a family stood by one another without needing to know the reason.

He certainly didn't want that to happen, but if it did, well, he loved Blaine enough to let him go.

Maybe it was best that he was finally realizing that.

Perhaps one did not want to be loved so much as to be understood.

However, he didn't want to let Blaine go because he died.

That's the last thing he wanted.

And he loved Blaine. But no matter how much he imagined their futures (hopefully together), he couldn't help but imagine Blaine not breathing and dying.

What was he supposed to think?

He felt as though he were wandering in the forests of the sea bottom, lost in a monstrous world where he himself was the monster. He was alone. The past was dead, the future was unimaginable

He had been there. Blaine wasn't breathing. He was dying. Sebastian hadn't been able to save him.

Was it too late?

Blaine was so perfect, but even the best man couldn't defeat death.

The end was contained in the beginning.

So long as human beings stay human, death and life are the same thing.

Kurt watched as the car turned into the hospital parking lot.

Even through the shut window pane, the world looked cold.

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Hey, guys!

So, I'm not sure about this chapter. I almost didn't post today because this chapter kept coming out depressing and just didn't flow right. However, I promised to post, so I decided to try this out.

I added all the quotes from George Orwell's book 1984 to help the flow… and, in doing that, made it much more depressing. But I kind of like it.

If it's bad, then tell me, and I'll rewrite it.

ATTN: ALL OF THE WORDS IN ITALIC ARE NOT MY OWN. THEY ARE FROM GEORGE ORWELL'S BOOK 1984. IT'S AN AMAZING BOOK AND TOTALLY WORTH READING!

Anyway, please review, and I hope this isn't too bad.

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.