Disclaimer: See Chapter One
Chapter Eleven
You say you've got a feeling,
You've figured out the writing on the wall
And angels on the ceiling
Won't calm you when you call
-Beth Hart, "Hiding Under Water"
xxx
Sanji was expecting Zoro to confront him when they had finally gotten back to their apartment after dinner.
However, he most certainly wasn't expecting Zoro to pin him bodily against the wall, holding his wrists securely above his head while he trapped the cook's long legs with his considerable weight advantage, his free hand coming to grip Sanji's collar as he bared his teeth. Truth be told, Sanji was a little intimidated. Sure, he figured that Zoro could be violent if he wanted to…the skill with which he handled his swords attested to that…but he didn't think that the other man would actually hurt him.
"Oi, Marimo, what's the big idea?" he tried to sound like he wasn't at all afraid of what Zoro was planning, and thought absently that he managed pretty well. "If you really wanted to molest me, you only would have had to ask."
"Why did you do it?"
"What?" Sanji blinked. He expected Zoro to be angry with him…furious, even. But thought the man's body position implied that he was just barely controlling his rage, his voice was something altogether different. He didn't sound angry. He sounded hurt.
"Why couldn't you tell me last night? Why didn't you trust me?"
"Zoro, can you even imagine what my mental state was when I walked through that door last night? I could hardly understand it myself. Why on earth would I waste my time trying to talk someone else through it?" Okay, so Zoro might not have been angry, but Sanji was certainly well on his way. What right did Zoro have to just demand information from him? From him, about a private matter that should have been of no concern to the swordsman.
Admittedly, the fact that Zoro did care was endearing, but right now he was too angry to really focus on that particular aspect.
"Because maybe I could have helped you! Do you realize how hard it was to see you come through that door all pale and shaking and just ask to sleep with me on the couch? Sanji, you're a whiny little girl sometimes, but you're also one of the strongest people I know, and the fact that you were affected like that made me realize that this wasn't some minor thing. You could have…"
"Told you. I know," Sanji forced himself to stop pushing against Zoro's hold and relaxed, letting the other man hold him against the wall. "I'm sorry. But really, it was nothing against you. Plus I knew you'd be finding out today anyway, so there was no need for you to hear it twice. Last night I just really needed to know that there was somebody there for me."
"Stupid cook," Zoro grunted, but Sanji noticed the distant look in his eyes still hadn't really gone away.
"Something else is bothering you," he said softly, staring into Zoro's dark eyes. "Tell me?"
"Just a silly thing," Zoro scoffed. "I was…alright, I was afraid that maybe you didn't tell me because you were afraid that I was one of these men out to get you, okay?" he blurted out, a slight flush colouring his cheeks as he finished speaking.
Sanji blinked about five times before breaking out into raucous laughter, and Zoro snarled at him as he finally managed to get a handle on his mirth, although his shoulders still shook with silent chuckles. "You really are an idiot, Marimo. Yeah, it's true that we butt heads a lot, but I never thought you wanted to kill me! Besides," he stopped chuckling and settled for staring at Zoro again. "If you really were one of Krieg's men, Kaku and Lucci wouldn't have let me come back here last night. Think about that for a second."
Zoro apparently did, because he didn't respond immediately, but he stood there returning the cook's stare without moving an inch. Sanji's wrists were starting to hurt from the firm grip the swordsman had on them (and he couldn't help noticing that one of Zoro's hands was big enough to wrap around both of his wrists with room to spare) but he didn't say anything else.
Time suddenly seemed to slow down as Zoro leant forward, their faces only inches from each other before he moved so agonizingly slowly to press his lips to the blonde's in something that could have almost been called a kiss if it wasn't so hesitant. The hand gripping Sanji's collar came up to brush lightly against his jaw, and Sanji closed his eyes as Zoro moved back marginally and dropped his forehead to rest on the cook's shoulder.
Well. This was weird. Of course Sanji had his own thoughts (as well as the well-informed hypothesises from his friends) that Zoro was attracted to him, but trust the other man to only act on his feelings when he was torn between knocking Sanji through a wall and just walking away and doing nothing. Sanji wondered if Zoro even knew how to kiss properly; the man was celibate to a fault, and the thought that there had been someone else wasn't something he had ever considered.
"I know how you feel."
"You what?" Sanji blinked as Zoro lifted his head a tad, his hand still ghosting lightly over Sanji's jaw and down his neck.
"That you feel betrayed because Kaku didn't tell you the truth. That's how I feel about you," Zoro finally released his wrists and straightened. "It hurts where it shouldn't, because we're nothing to each other, but it's the same feeling I got every time you flirted with someone else or…every time I called you those names."
"Slut, you mean?" Sanji rubbed his wrists as he raised his curled brow.
Zoro flinched perceptibly at the word and turned away. "I think I'm the one who should be apologizing. I'm making a big deal out of this, and I'm not even the one in danger. You're the one whose life is on the line, and here I am getting angry with you when I should be supporting you. I don't know why you put up with me."
"Yeah, I don't either," Sanji dug a cigarette out and lit it, taking a drag of smoke before continuing. "You're the most annoying, ill-mannered brute I think I've ever had the displeasure of meeting. You only care about your swords, and you act like I belong to you even when you've never shown any signs of wanting the same. You're consistently inconsiderate to women and you have possibly less tact than Luffy."
He could see Zoro curling into himself at every line and felt a little remorse before he strode forward. "But that doesn't matter, right? So what if we hate each other? So what if I think you're a pig and you think I'm a woman? That's not important. What's important is that every single time you look at me with that disgusted look in your eye something tightens in my chest and I feel guilty, even if I haven't done anything wrong. What matters is that right now I want to run away from this apartment forever because…"
But he never got to finish as Zoro grabbed him and pulled him into his strong embrace, holding the cook so tightly that it was almost painful when he took a breath and kept going. Sanji quickly butted the cigarette out in a nearby ashtray before he set anything on fire. "Because I'm in danger, and if you got hurt because of me, I wouldn't be able to live with myself," he finished quietly, bringing his own arms around Zoro's broad back and turning his head so that he could kiss the side of Zoro's neck, managing to wiggle out of Zoro's hold enough that he could trail light kisses along Zoro's smooth jaw and up to his lips. "Now let me show you what a real kiss is like."
Zoro opened his mouth to say something but Sanji swallowed the words as he threw Zoro off-balance with a jerk of his heel and caught the younger man's lips in a searing kiss, taking advantage of the other man's pause to slide his tongue into Zoro's mouth as he gripped at the swordsman with one hand fisted in Zoro's shirt and the other finding whatever purchase it could in his mossy hair. He hiked one leg around Zoro's waist and hoisted himself farther up to better the angle, exploring every crevice of Zoro's mouth and stroking the other man's tongue lightly until Zoro finally responded, tentatively brushing their tongues together before he realized that this was just another type of fight and treated it like one. He set one hand in the small of Sanji's back and supported him as the other came under his thigh to push him farther up, holding the smoke-flavoured kiss until his lungs were about to burst before he pulled back with a gasp, staring up into bright cobalt eyes as Sanji gave him a self-satisfied smirk.
Before Zoro could react, he found himself falling backward and hit the ground with a painful thud, thankful that Sanji had kept his hand behind the swordsman's head so that it wouldn't hit the floor. He was still a little taken aback by the slender mass of blonde cook who was suddenly pressed up against him like he needed him to live, but it wasn't necessarily a bad thing. "Oi, hold on!" he finally gasped as Sanji continued to pepper his exposed skin with kisses, and he was currently sucking the other man's earrings into his mouth as Zoro spoke.
"Sorry," Sanji looked a little ashamed as he started to pull away, but Zoro held him in place. "Zoro, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…"
"Don't apologize. Not for that," Zoro assured him.
"But I'm making assumptions again," Sanji protested. "I mean, just because Usopp and Kaku and Ace think you're jealous doesn't…"
"Cook, shut up," Zoro growled before pushing himself up and catching Sanji's mouth again as the blonde allowed his eyes to flutter closed and he lowered himself against Zoro, the other man finally taking some initiative and twining his tongue with the cook's, the taste and scent of nicotine and spice surrounding him. Deciding that Sanji wouldn't care if he took it a little farther, he untucked the blonde's dress shirt and slid a hand slowly up his back, revelling in the feel of smooth, perfect skin under his calloused fingertips as Sanji let out a gasp.
His motion broke the kiss, and as they stared at each other, Zoro set his hand firmly on Sanji's back and pushed him so that they were lying completely flush against each other. Sanji gave him a coy smile before he allowed himself to relax and pillowed his head under Zoro's chin, his own hands continuing to explore the larger man's body leisurely. "Hey."
"Hmm?" Zoro cracked open an eye and cocked his head to the side. Sanji had been silent for so long that Zoro almost thought he was asleep.
"Do you…do you think we could move the beds around so that they were connected?"
"Probably. Why?"
"Sleeping on the couch is gonna get old real fast."
"Wait," Zoro shook his head. "You mean, you want to sleep with me? Like, all the time?"
"Only if you do."
"Aren't we moving a little fast, cook?"
"Hey, the first night Ace and I did this we were screwing by this time," Sanji reminded him.
"Lovely image."
"Isn't it, though?" Sanji sighed. "Gorgeous man."
"Look, I'm jealous already, okay? I don't need you to rub it in any more," Zoro grumbled as Sanji laughed and nudged his chin with his head. "So. Bed?"
"Bed sounds great," Sanji got up and stretched, making sure the door was locked before striding into the bedroom where he and Zoro got the beds sorted out. He took a quick shower and got ready for bed, opting not to wear a shirt because the green-haired man was practically a human furnace, and climbed into bed wearing only a thin pair of boxers as Zoro lumbered to the bathroom.
He was almost asleep by the time the bedsprings creaked and Zoro clambered in, wrapping around him from behind and kissing the back of his neck. Sanji couldn't help but smile at the action: everything he had said about Zoro being rough and uncouth and uncultured was all too true, but there was this surprisingly gentle and caring side that he showed very rarely that Sanji appreciated. He would never want Zoro to treat him like a woman, of course, but the fact remained that he was a hopeless romantic, and if their relationship was all sneering and name-calling it wouldn't be the most pleasant experience.
Wait. Relationship?
"Hey, Marimo?"
"Yeah?"
"What are we?"
"Who cares?" was the intelligent response. "What, you want to put a label on whatever we have going?"
"Forget it," Sanji rolled his eyes, figuring that he should have known it would be hopeless to talk to the Marimoabout these things.
"Hey, we don't need a title, okay?" Zoro let his hands caress Sanji's sides as the blonde squirmed a little bit at the ticklish sensation. "Why can't we just be what we are?"
"And what are we?" Sanji pressed.
"Whatchamacallit…whatever you call you and Ace…friends with benefits?"
"Friends?"
"Okay, rivals with benefits. Better?"
"Yeah. I guess," Sanji let his hand rest over one of Zoro's and wasn't at all surprised when after only a few seconds he heard soft snores coming from behind him. Rolling his eyes for good measure before he closed them, he shifted back farther into Zoro's warmth and waited for sleep to come.
000
When he opened his eyes, the first thing he noticed was that it was daytime. The second was that something was lightly flicking his forehead. And the third was that there was a person perched on the edge of the bed staring at him. Like he was a bug. And he hated bugs.
"Kaku," it was a growl and a groan mixed into one. "What are you doing?"
"Waking you up," the long-nosed man made it sound as if it were a perfectly natural thing to be doing. "It's nearly noon, and you have work in five hours."
"Yes, thank you," Sanji moved Zoro's arm off of him before sitting up and attempting to rectify the mess his hair was in. Rather unsuccessfully, at least until Kaku did it for him and Sanji let him work the snarls out of the blonde strands. "I'm so happy you know my work schedule."
"Hmm…it's my job."
"And how well I know that."
"You're still angry with me," Kaku's hands dropped to his shoulders. "And don't say you're not, because I can tell."
"Then I won't," Sanji shrugged out of the older man's grip and stood up, going over to the closet and pulling out a pair of loose-fitting sweatpants. He could feel Kaku staring at him the entire time and wondered if he was really just being a child about all of this.
Especially after last night. When Zoro had said those things…when Sanji realized that he had been doing the same thing to Zoro that Kaku had done to him, why didn't it change his mind? Zoro had understood. Zoro had forgiven him. And Zoro wasn't one to forgive easy, so…
He shook his head and turned around as Kaku gave him a wan smile. "Hey," Sanji sighed and allowed himself a moment to compose his thoughts. Was he angry? Not anymore; not really. It was such a silly thing to be angry about, anyway. Kaku had to keep his work a secret because otherwise it would cost him his life. And those were reasons that held a lot more serious complications than his own excuses of 'you'll find out tomorrow and I'm tired' that he'd used on Zoro. "Why do you have a key?" he finally asked.
"Because of Lucci," Kaku replied. "Whenever he's working on a particularly difficult case it's unpleasant to live in the same building as him. Zoro gave me a key so I could hide out here and save my sanity."
"Well, it hasn't worked," Sanji leant back slightly and propped a hand on his hip. "You're insane."
"Insanity is just another name for brilliance."
"Tell yourself that, boy," Sanji couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face. He had noticed how easy it was to forgive Kaku when they were together the other night, and now being with him again only heightened that feeling. He couldn't stay mad at him. "Look, Kaku, I forgive you," he said firmly.
"That's what you said the other night…"
"I mean it this time," Sanji reached for his cigarettes on the dresser and lit one. "But I'm warning you, long-nose, if you pull a stunt like that again…"
"No more secrets," Kaku promised, holding up his hands in a gesture of surrender before turning to glance at Zoro. "He's a heavy sleeper, is he?"
"Whatever. Oi, you come here for a reason?" he asked.
"Training? We never really got to do anything last time."
"Oh, yes, because of the phone call that changed my life. Well, at least the pigeon isn't with you this time," Sanji sounded a little relieved as they made their way to the living room.
000
Zoro woke up slowly until he realized that the warm body he had last remembered holding in his arms was gone, and he wondered if Sanji was coming back before he heard the unmistakeable sounds of a fight going on in the living room.
Swearing under his breath he threw the covers back and staggered out of the room as fast as he could. "Hey!" he yelled, rushing into the living room and blinking in disbelief as two heads swivelled to look at him. Unfortunately, Sanji was in the middle of some kind of intricate one-handed spin-kick, and the shift in concentration made him lose his balance and land rather heavily on the man below him.
"Ow. Stupid swordsman, you just don't barge in like that," Sanji pushed himself up onto his elbows, his bare torso gleaming with a light sheen of sweat as he levelled a glare on Zoro. "Sorry, Kaku."
"Understandable," Kaku winced slightly before removing his cap and fiddling with his now sweat-slicked hair in order to minimize the darker ring where the cap had been. Sanji reached and ruffled it for him with a grin.
"Just returning the favour," he winked and Kaku shoved him off with one hand before setting it on the ground, pushing himself up so that he was perpendicular to the floor with his other hand settled on his hip before he rotated his arm and pushed off with the hand he was using to brace himself, gaining just enough momentum to flip around and land on his feet. "Hmph. Show-off."
"You're just jealous," was Kaku's response. "But truly, Zoro, it's dangerous to interrupt a choreography session. If Sanji had been a millisecond farther into that kick he could have easily injured one of both of us."
"Sorry," Zoro scratched his head. "But I heard fighting, and it looked like you were trying to kill each other."
"Idiot," Sanji walked up to Zoro and gave him a brief peck on the lips. "Nobody's going to barge into our apartment and try to kill me. Chances are they don't even know where I live, yet. Right?"
"We don't believe that they do," Kaku replied. "But then, that is what we've been trying to find out. They may not know anything more than that you are Zeff's foster-son, and we can't even be sure that they know what you look like. After all, you're supposed to be the sous-chef, so having you work as a waiter may in fact throw them off."
"Hooray," Sanji twirled a finger in the air. "More shifts on the floor."
"Don't complain," Zoro grunted. "As long as it keeps you safe, I'm happy."
"Aw, Marimo-kun is worried again," Sanji sighed dramatically. "You're so cute."
"I'm not cute," Zoro grumbled under his breath. "Well, now that I know nobody's going to die out here, I'm going to get dressed." He belatedly realized that he was still standing out in the open with nothing but a pair of boxers on, and while he was sure that Sanji didn't care and Kaku could pretty much ignore everything, he decided that it was probably a good idea to put some more clothes on.
As he walked back into the bedroom, Kaku turned to Sanji and raised an eyebrow.
"What?"
"You kissed him."
"Oh…yeah," Sanji scratched his head. "Stuff…kinda happened last night."
" 'Stuff?'"
"Not that stuff," Sanji sat down on the couch. "But I guess we're together now…or whatever you want to call it."
"Well, I'm happy for you."
"Come. Sit. You're making me uncomfortable with your hovering," Sanji patted the seat beside him and Kaku moved over, seating himself on the edge of the cushion. "Now. What do you want to know?"
"How did yesterday go? Rob didn't talk much when he came home, but how did all of your friends take the news?"
"Really well, actually," Sanji admitted after a moment. "But then, none of them are really the type to shun me just because I'm suddenly in a little danger. In fact, a lot of them think it's exciting."
"Good. It's always hard to predict how those close to the intended victim…"
"Don't call me that. You make me sound like I need rescuing."
"Forgive me. But it's always hard to predict if people will take it with a grain of salt or make altogether too big a deal of it," he finished. "And how did they take to Rob?"
"Well, Luffy and Usopp and Chopper love him," Sanji rolled his eyes. "Scared the living daylights out of me with his ventriloquist act, though."
"You should hear him around the house," Kaku replied sympathetically. "Sometimes I need to leave just because of that."
"And yet you still put up with him," Sanji couldn't resist teasing as he grabbed one of the blankets off the couch and wrapped it around his shoulders, not wanting to go into the bedroom to grab a shirt while Zoro was still…ah…possibly not fully clothed. "Hey, Kaku, you said no more secrets, right?"
"I did," Kaku was looking a little wary at where this was going.
"I know you claim that you and Lucci aren't involved now, but were you ever?"
"You really want to know, hmm?"
"Consider it payback for blabbing to your coworkers that Ace and I were together," Sanji replied with a rather amiable smile.
"Alright, then," Kaku stared at his hands in his lap for a minute. "Yes, then. We were lovers. Once."
"How long ago?"
"Couple of years, maybe. It's not important," Kaku looked rather desperate to change the topic. He started to fidget and crossed his ankles, now moving his eyes to focus on a spot on the far wall.
"Hey," Sanji put a hand on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Kaku had a wistful smile on his face. "You always hear that getting involved with your coworkers leads to trouble, but you never think it would happen to you. That's why I refuse to do anything about Kalifa. It's true that we don't work together nearly as much as Lucci and I do, but the last thing we need between our members is unwanted tension."
"So why do you still live together?"
"Habit, mostly," Kaku admitted, leaning slightly towards Sanji. "It's familiar; comfortable in a way, I suppose, although the notion of 'comfort' really doesn't hold any stock with Rob. I should have known it was doomed from the beginning, really, because he is relentless in his pursuit of bringing justice about, and justice will always be his mistress. I was a distraction for a time, but it could only have ever been temporary."
"Anything I can do?" Sanji felt compelled to ask.
"Unless you can inject even a shred of humanity into him, I'd say no," Kaku replied bluntly. "But I don't need to stay here any more, and it's obvious that you and Zoro would rather I leave so that you may continue whatever you started last night. I'll be at the restaurant."
"Oi, you're not going anywhere," Sanji moved to grip Kaku's shoulder. "And believe me, if Lucci can't see that you're a prize, then that's his loss."
"Yes, because I'm what most people would find attractive…"
"Kaku, can you just stop with that?" Zoro had come back out and plopped on Kaku's other side, nudging the older man's foot with his own. "Yes, we know your nose is weird. I have green hair and blondie over there has a swirly eyebrow. Now get over it."
"Oi," Sanji sniffed and pointedly looked anywhere but at Zoro, who seemed like he was about to continue when a cell phone went off. "That's me," Sanji reached for the end table, only to find Kaku already there and holding the phone to his ear.
"Hello? Yes, yes. May I ask who's calling?" he nodded and clapped a hand over the mouthpiece. "Sanji, you wouldn't by chance know a man named Brook, would you?"
"Give it here," Sanji leaned over and swiped the phone. "Hey, Brook."
"Ah, my friend Sanji! I was hoping I'd catch you at home. May I ask who that was who first answered?" Brook's smooth voice flowed through the phone.
"My mother," Sanji replied sarcastically before continuing.
"Ah. One of your guards, then?"
"If you want to call him that," Sanji admitted. "Why are you phoning?"
"I'm with Franky and the lovely Miss Nico, and we were wondering whether you would like to go out with us for an afternoon drink before your shift tonight. It would be possible for us to take you directly to the restaurant so that you would not be alone."
"That'd be great, Brook," Sanji replied truthfully. Even if he didn't know the thin man all that well, Robin was always wonderful to talk to whenever he was feeling a little conflicted about something. Besides, he was sure that she would have tons of advice.
"Would you be able to meet us or should we come there to pick you up?"
"Give me a second. Mom, can I go out with friends, or do they have to come here first?" he asked, blinking shyly and blushing a little as Zoro basically fell off the couch due to the fact that he was laughing so hard.
"Don't patronize me, boy," Kaku replied smugly. "I would prefer it if they were to come here."
"Mom says you have to come," Sanji told Brook.
"Yohohoho!" he laughed, causing Sanji to wince and hold the phone away form his ear. "Excellent. We shall see you soon, then, friend!"
"Yeah. See you, Brook."
He clapped the phone shut. "Brook, Franky and Robin are taking me out for coffee. You idiots want to come along or not?"
"Nah. You need some time alone," Zoro cracked his neck with a sound that made the cook grimace. "I'll see you after your shift, alright?"
"You want anything before I go?"
"I'm sure that we can find our own food," Kaku said. "Right, Zoro?"
"Yeah. You're spoiling me with all your fancy dishes, cook," Zoro stood up and tugged on Sanji's wrist, pulling them so that his hands were settled on Sanji's hips. "Not that I don't appreciate it, but I don't want to turn into some sort of food snob."
"Not like you ever could be, you uncouth swordsman," Sanji smirked as Zoro leant in for a kiss. "Zoro, off, we've got company."
"He doesn't care."
"Off, you horny idiot," Sanji shoved him away. "Honestly. This is your first real relationship and you're starting it like you'd rather eat me than kiss me. It's no wonder you've never had a girlfriend, really, because if you came onto them like that they'd only accuse you of being a pervert."
"Look who's talking," Zoro shot back.
"My tastes are much more refined than yours," Sanji picked up the blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders again. "Well, I'm going to get ready. I'll meet you at the restaurant?" he asked Kaku.
"Yes. Get one of your friends to walk you in if I'm not waiting outside."
"Fine."
"And Sanji?"
"Yes?"
"I don't really appreciate being called 'mom.'"
"Deal with it, buddy. You're acting like one. I mean, not that I'd really know, but…" Sanji shook his head and gave them a small smile before heading into the bedroom, leaving them both wondering about what exactly had happened in his past.
Notes:
1. Not a whole lot to say this time around, other than an update report. I won't be around next week for the 'scheduled' update, so it will either be a day early or a day or so late. Any preferences? The week after should be back to normal :)
2. I got a review regarding Mihawk's name, so I'll try and clear it up. I realize that in Japanese it is technically spelt 'Jurakyuuru', which would Romanize to 'Juracule,' but I've never seen it spelt that way in fanfics. I have seen Juraquille, but that isn't correct either (it would have to be 'Jurakiiru'). The reason I use 'Dracule' is simply because A. it is the most common name seen in fanfics and B. this is the 'official' English translation used by Funimation, and their script has been approved by Toei Animation (and, Funi has said, Oda himself). Hope that makes sense!
3. This weekend is a long weekend! I work every day! Hooray!
My job is quite physically taxing, so expect me to be tired by next week…:( I mean, I love it, but it kinda sneaks up on you and lays you out after a few days…
I console myself with the fact that 21st Century Breakdown is out tomorrow. However, I won't get to listen to it until way late.
I think that's everything. Hope everyone enjoyed, and please keep the reviews coming!