Katherine Beckett (KBPOV)
After Castle asked me on a date, took me about 30 minutes to really understand what have happened. I didn't need to think to know that my answer would be yes, but after I hang up I had to think about the consequences. If we started a relationship would I be able to make it last, like really last, I didn't want another relationship like I had with Peter. Maybe Castle was my chance to find real love, whatever that meant. And if we went on a date and the spark wasn't there anymore? What would we do? Go back to being friends? Maybe it would be too weird. I didn't know how things would play out; I kind hoped that everything would be alright, but what did I really consider alright? I considered alright us as friends, lovers or sex buddies? I didn't know.
Even with my problems thinking where everything would lead, I was anxious for the date. Castle appeared to be too because one hour after he asked me, he had already called me back informing where we would go. It was a nice restaurant called Veritas I have heard about it. It had more than one thousand options of wine; Castle has chosen well. He also informed me that he would pick me up at 9 pm.
Friday couldn't arrive soon enough, at Thursday I left the office in the middle of the afternoon to search a new dress; I wanted to look sexy but not the kind of sexy that screamed that I wanted to get laid, that wasn't the mission of the night. Not that I didn't want to sleep with Castle, who wouldn't want? I went at Barneys and bought a good and old fashioned dress on the Chanel style, a black and white dress that showed my curves without being vulgar. I took the opportunity to also buy a new lingerie, I didn't want to use the same lingerie that I used with Peter, with Castle; and not to say that I stopped being a shoe addicted girl, I bought a new pair of high heels that were screaming my name when I passed through them.
On Friday I started getting dressed at 6pm, way to early but I wanted to be sure that I wasn't late, if there was something that always made me mad was when people were late, so I always made sure that I wasn't. When I was ready and looked myself at the mirror, I felt positive that everything would be alright, the dress was perfect with the high hells and the new lingerie made me confident of myself. Nothing in the world usually make you feel better about yourself than new clothes that look really good on you.
At 9 pm on the dot, Castle knocked on my door, before opening I looked at the hall mirror and passed my fingers through my fingers, just to be sure that I was indeed as beautiful as I thought previously.
"Hey Castle." I said smiling and trying to taking in how handsome Castle's looked. The navy suit he was wearing fitted him perfectly and the color was perfect, matched his eyes.
"Hey Kate, I brought you flowers." He said showing me a bouquet that was behind his back with white roses.
"Wow, thank you Castle. You didn't need to." I said taking the flowers and going to the kitchen to find a vase to put it on.
"Well, I need to. We are going on a date and I wanted to, I don't know; make sure that you know it that we are going on a real date." He said looking nervous at me, almost like he was afraid that I would back out.
"Castle, I know this is a date. That our relationship after today could and probably will change."
"Yeah, it will." He said walking towards me and standing in front of me. "I want you to know Kate, that I like you and I hope that soon you will became my girlfriend, but if you are not ready or don't feel the chemistry or whatever reason you may have in the future to not want to be my girlfriend, I want you to know that I won't cut you out of my life or hold it against you or anything like that, okay?"
"Hey Castle, I know that you won't." I said putting his face between my hands and looking into his ocean blue eyes. "I want to go on this date with you and discover if we could be something more, but if we can't be, I don't want to lose my best friend, okay?"
"Yeah, okay." He said looking intensely at me.
"Good." I said looking into his eyes and taking a step so I was face to face with him; his lips were so close to me, that I could almost taste it. I inclined myself towards his lips that were so delicious and closed my eyes ready to finally get a taste of his lips, which I wanted to kiss for so long. I touched lightly his lips with mine and whispered. "I will only really kiss you when you bring to my door after our date safe, satisfied, and if you play your cards right, I will even let you feel me up. But I won't put out on the first date, it's not like a ladies behave. Understood Castle?"
"Hum?"
"You understand that I will only kiss you after the date and if you play your cards right I will even let you feel me up" I whispered at his lips again.
"Yes, I understand."
"Great, let's go! I can't wait to taste all the wines they can offer! I hope you aren't going to drive, because I want to taste at least five tips of wine!" I said walking away like nothing ever happened and picking up my bag and opening my door. "Let's go Castle; I don't want to be late."
"Yes, of course. Let's go." He said regaining his posture.
When we arrived at the restaurant I was glad that I didn't saw any paparazzi, although normally I wouldn't care, I didn't want our first date on page 6 the next day.
When we sat and chose our first glass of wine, we stared at each other almost afraid to say something and ruin everything. We sat there with our hands on the table looking into each other eyes. After a few minutes like this, Castle said something.
"How was your week?"
"It was great, work is great like usually is. How was your week?"
"Good, I am still working on this new book, I am almost finished with it and I am excited about it."
"I am glad Castle, when will you tell me about the story?"
"Well, maybe you can come to my house next week, have dinner and I will show you it. I bet Alexis would love to see you again, she really likes you." He said with a pleased smile on his face.
"I really like her too. And Castle, we didn't even finish our first real date and you are already inviting me out again? You are really sure about yourself, aren't you Mister Castle?'" I said smiling and taking a sip of my wine.
"I will let you know Miss Becket, that I am indeed really sure about myself. Why? Don't you think that the date is going well?"
"I think it's perfect. This restaurant you picked up is perfect, I loved it." I said looking around at the restaurant where the decoration was made on soft colors and had beautiful and big chandeliers; I have always liked chandeliers, when they are beautiful, they make everything look so classy.
"I am glad you like." He said squeezing my hand. "When I heard about it a few weeks ago and about their collection of red wine I thought about you immediately and I glad that I could bring you here."
"I am glad too." I said squeezing his hand back.
After that first awkward moment we couldn't stop talking, we talked for three hours almost without stopping, after a few more glasses of wine my head was feeling a little light, since at that point on my life, it was impossible for me to get drunk.
When we have eaten the desserts and drank a little more wine, we decided to call it the night and agreed to talk in the morning so we could maybe schedule something on the next day.
When he was going to leave me on my door, I was ready to invite him in to spend the night with me, I was ready, he knew about the scars so he wouldn't get scared or anything and the wine made me feel good about myself, or maybe was Castle's presence that made me feel so good about myself but at the time I didn't want to think about it. And I also ignored his earlier statement saying that he wanted to be my boyfriend.
"Well, good night Kate. I hope you liked our first date." He said kissing me at the cheek and going.
"But Castle, you don't want your kiss? The date was amazing, I am safe and satisfied. You deserve a kiss." I said.
"Kate, I really want to kiss you since the first day we met, but when I kiss you, I want you to be the more sober possible, because I want you to really remember. Understood?"
"I understood." I said with a serious face.
"Good. Call me tomorrow so we can go out for lunch or something like that, if you want to."
"I will probably want to, goodbye Castle."
"Goodnight Kate."
When he left I entered at my apartment and went straight to bed, took off all of my clothes and entered under my blanket; want to know my last thought? Well, even if you didn't want to I would tell you: Castle said he liked, I should start running soon, I can't make him develop stronger feelings, because in the end he will probably get hurt. And a little voice inside my head answered to this statement: I don't want to run, because maybe, just maybe, I really like him too, and maybe, just maybe, I could fall in love with him.
In the morning, I woke up with a light headache. As I usually did, I stayed on my bed for a feel more minutes, looking up to my ceiling, looking for something that I knew wasn't there and not really sure of what I was looking.
When I remembered the night before, a little smile played on my face and I started feeling something new, maybe I was starting to feel plain happy, something that I had heard but haven't felt in decades. But quickly the smile disappeared and I quote from Douglas Coupland came to my mind:
"Happy. And then I got afraid that it would vanish as quickly as it came. That it was accidental – that I didn't deserve it. It's like this very, very, very nice car crash that never ends."
But like everybody do, I hid the thought somewhere on my head and forgot about it, I got up, took a shower, and tried prepared myself for a new day, maybe I would call Castle and schedule to meet him again that day. When Castle came back to my mind, the smile came back to my lips.
I started watching Scandal, if you guys don't watch, please do. It will ruin your life but will be totally worth it!
See you guys next week, don't forget to review please :)
Good week.