Condoms in a Quick-E-Mart
Larry loved convenience stores. He could get the most basic condiments for the cheapest prices in any of them. He bought a magazine and some cheap wine that he hoped would be useful, and went to the counter to purchase it.
He discreetly asked the clerk if he had any condoms. To be more specific, he asked for it to be ribbed, colored, lubricated, plaid, and peppermint-flavored. The clerk was as discreet as him until then. Then he shouted to the seemingly empty store about a weirdo buying said condom. Faces appeared from nowhere and they said, "What a pervert!"
Pissed off, Larry thanked the "big-mouthed" clerk and left with his stuff.