Okay, sorry, so probably the updates will be not Fridays, but Sundays. It does make more sense, when I think of it...

Enjoy!

Chapter 3

In the end we play poker almost the entire night. Cas' friends turn out to be awesome all things considered. The girls are somewhat easy, judging by the way they both hit on me, but hey – it's the end of the world. And this Mike guy seems to be really decent guy. He doesn't leave Cas' side for a second and Cas does seem to pay him more attention than the others, but I suppose they've been through a lot.

By the time they all clear out I'm drunk and beat, but I've heard more than enough to get the impression of what the world is like. All of his friends have lost families – April and June have lost their parents and boyfriends, Mike has lost his wife and his two year old. I can see it's hard for all of them to speak of their losses, but Mike seems to be the most unbalanced. When he tells his story, I notice how much Cas tenses up and how he looks at him as if waiting for him to crack. He doesn't though and by the time he finished his story, Cas relaxes and smiles at Mike as if he's about to congratulate him for winning a gold medal or something. It's a bit unnerving, especially since Mike stares at Cas as if he's hung a moon. I know it shouldn't, but it still pisses me off. April tells a story of how the other Dean found her running from the herd of croats when they spotted her looking for some food in her hometown's shop. He saved her life, but she was in shock for weeks after. It was Cas who coaxed her back to join the living with his stories and his constant caring and from the comments Mike makes it's clear that if she hadn't snapped out of it, the leader would have thrown her out. I don't want to believe that, but Cas doesn't really deny it either so… And then June tells the story how she and her boyfriend managed to survive croats for years before coming to Chitaqua. They heard of the camp and decided to come here, but along the way they ran into some people and decided to go together. Couple of hours later one of them turned and bit her boyfriend. He killed the croat and killed himself before she had a chance to say a word. Brave new world indeed.

There are more stories like that – they tell me some of them and keep some to themselves, but I've heard and seen enough to promise myself I will do whatever it takes not to let this happen in my time. What surprises me the most is that despite all of this, these people are surprisingly normal – yeah, okay, Mike seems unhinged, but the girls are alright. They all smoke weed of course, but hey – kids go through tons of weed in college and the stress level here is out of the roof.

Anyway, they are finally out and both of us are slightly stoned and drunk. We're still sitting on the rug, sharing the joint when I ask him.

"What's the deal with Mike, anyway? You two seem joined at the hip."

Cas looks at me for a long while. Then he sighs.

"When I found Mike he was nearly catatonic. He was the one who killed his wife and kid after they turned and when I found him he was sitting staring at their corpses and waiting for some croats to find him. It was my last raid, back when the leader still allowed me on the raids. It was a miracle I found him at all – I drifted too far out. There was no reason for it – Mike didn't make a sound, but I entered the house anyway. When I saw him, I thought he was a croat, but when I trained my gun on him, he just looked up and muttered 'finally'… So instead of killing him, I took him with me. It took me a while to convince him. So long in fact that I was sure the leader and the rest had left. It wasn't unheard of anyway – if you didn't get back on time, you were left behind. But I had to try to get him to this relative safety so I stayed with him and begged him until he finally agreed to go. I was four hours late by then so I started looking for a vehicle to get back to the camp. Instead I found very pissed off fearless leader – apparently he was looking for me and really wasn't happy… One of the biggest shouting matches ever – he yelled and yelled how I was a threat to everyone, how he won't go looking for me ever again and you know – all that jazz… And then Mike hit him." He chuckles here and I can imagine the shit storm that must've followed. "In the end I got my ass kicked and banned from raids, but I got Mike into the camp. He lived with me for almost a month after – he needed some time to adjust, to start functioning on his own again. It's not easy for him still – he's in too much pain most of the time, so I like to keep him around, to spot the breakdowns before they happen and pull him out of them while I still can. He's allowed on the raids though and he's good on them – it's usually the quiet time that gets to him… Anyway, in the camp it is generally agreed that Mike and I are together and we both support the rumors."

"Whoa, whoa – together as in… You know, together?!" I ask startled. What the hell?

He laughs. "Yeah, together as in together. To everyone here Mike is mine and so they leave him pretty much alone."

"And are you… Together? As in… together?" I stammer and even to me I sound like an idiot. But hey, it's Cas we're talking about! As in my angel Cas – how am I supposed to react to him being together with a dude?!

"Okay, I'll kick your ass if you tell this to anyone and I mean anyone at all, but no, we're not together as in together. Mike's my friend. My best friend really and… I suppose he's the only family I have left. He's been with me when I was breaking down and I was with him when he was – it kind of makes you stick around."

"And what about the leader?" I ask, because I think the dick is probably not happy about it. "How does he take him?"

"He generally loathes him." Cas chuckles. "I mean, for all he knows, Mike and I are together and the idea of me being any degree of content pisses him off. Besides, Mike fights him every time the leader jumps on me, so no, there's no love lost between them."

"Yeah, I thought so…"

"Why's that?" He asks suddenly staring at me.

"Um… Well, you know, 'cause he's a dick." I mumble, but this does get me thinking. Fine, the leader is a dick, but why do I hate the idea of Cas being with that Mike guy? I mean he does sound like a nice guy and he cares about Cas a great deal. I should be happy he's found someone, instead… It pisses me off that Cas has someone to call family that's not… well, me. It's absurd really, I must be more stoned than I though. So I change the subject. "Cas, man, you gotta tell me, where did you learn to play poker like that?"

Cas laughs loudly.

"You taught me. Before, when we all still lived at Bobby's, poker was your favorite past time and you taught me all the different kinds of poker you knew. And then you complained a lot, because in the end I play better."

"That's a load of bullshit and you know it!" I growl and then laugh, because dammit, he is better.

"Yeah, yeah, but just so you know, you actually owe me everything you've got and you had been responsible for the dishes at Bobby's for as long as we lived there."

We both laugh again, but then Cas stiffens. I look up and see the leader standing in the doorway.

"Good, so you found your way back here. Didn't want to go back there looking for your sorry ass." He snarls.

"Then perhaps you shouldn't go hitting yourself in the first place? Talk about suicidal tendencies." Cas smirks and the leader narrows his eyes at him.

"I don't recall asking for your opinion. Then again, nobody asks for it anymore, do they? What insight can a useless junky provide anyway?"

I swear I see red at his jibe.

"Fuck off!" I yell. "What the hell is wrong with you? How could I have become such a douche?!"

"Relax, Dean." Cas says calmly. It appears he's more than used to being treated that way.

"What is he, your guard dog now?" The leader sneers. "Whatever happened to Mike?"

"You know, oh fearless, I would think you'd get it – what's with your clear and substance free brain. I would think you'd see what you've become if people around me want to protect me from you."

He stares at him for long while and I can almost see how he's fuming. Finally he unclenches his fists and says silently.

"A word. Outside."

"Hell no!" I yell, but Cas stands up.

"Don't worry Dean. The leader has yet to actually prove I should be afraid of him. Let's see what he wants." He walks out of the cabin and the dick follows him. I consider going after them, but decide not to. I know he won't actually do anything to really hurt him – I could never hurt Cas, regardless how bad things were – and clearly Cas knows it too.

I don't know when exactly he returns, but I don't think he's been out for long. I'm lying on his bed, almost asleep and Cas flops down beside me.

"You okay?" I ask sleepily.

"Yeah, I'm okay." He says, but his voice shakes and I look at him. "Really, I'm fine."

"What did he want?" I yawn.

"To make a point. It doesn't matter, really. He didn't say anything I didn't know already."

"Way to be cryptic." I groan.

"It doesn't matter, Dean. And by the way, since you asked so nicely, you can sleep here, but I warn you, no cuddling!"

I grin at him. Dammit, I am in his bed and I didn't even ask if he's fine with me sharing it – how 'bout that?

"I don't cuddle." I tell him and he laughs. "What?"

"I had to sleep with you in your Impala – you cuddle!"

"That's a filthy lie!" I shake my head resolutely. "If the cuddliness ensued then you were the one doing it."

"You'd think that, wouldn't you? I gotta disappoint you – you are a cuddler! Anyway, sleep, Dean. And no cuddling." He chuckles and we both drift to sleep.

/\/\/\

"One rule, Dean." I hear a groggy voice as open my eyes. It takes me a moment to understand where I am. Right, 2014. I lift my head and to my utter horror I realize I am draped over my friend! My face was nuzzled between his shoulder and neck and my own traitorous arm is wrapped around his middle. I pull back at once. Dammit! I do not blush. I do not fucking blush! Except that of course I do…

"Sorry." I mutter.

"Don't worry about it." He smirks. "I know I'm irresistible to cuddle at. As long as you're not drooling on me…"

"Oh, shut up…" I groan and hide my face in the pillow. I try my best not to hear him laugh.

"Come on, relax. It's not a big deal." He chuckles and gets up. "I'll go get a shower while you battle your embarrassment."

He pads out of the door and I groan again. Dammit… This place is getting to me in all the wrong ways. I've shared bed with Sam countless time – when money is short and we can't afford two rooms and the only one available is a double. Yet never, and I mean never, had I waken up snuggled against him! What the hell was that? And I can't even blame Cas – I was the one cuddling him! Dammit!

I lie hiding my face for some time, just to get myself under control. Finally I roll out of the bed and yawn. From the looks of it, it's late afternoon, which means I've slept for at the very least seven hours. Now that's something – it's the end of the world and I sleep like a baby. I hear someone climbing up the steps and turn around to see who it is. It's Mike.

"Hi Mike. Cas is not here, he's taking a shower." I tell him and he nods seriously.

"I know, I saw him go. It's you I wanted to speak to."

"Okay." I say carefully. There's something in his tone I don't particularly like. "What is it?"

"Cas. I know he thinks you're not the same as the fearless leader, but to me it sounds like a load of crap. And I don't intend to sit around and do nothing while you stamp on him again."

"Hey!" I scowl. "I have never… I have no intentions to stamp on him."

"Yeah, well, forgive me for not trusting you. Your carbon copy is always more than happy to kick Cas whenever he gets his guard down."

"I'm not…"

"Shut up and listen." He growls. "It took him a while, a long while if you ask me, to learn to always be on guard whenever that dick is around. He would let himself believe there's still a chance to get you back and that asshole would break him again and again until finally he accepted the fact you are lost. And now, when he found a way to manage, you come along and I can see he's letting you in again. You'll be gone anytime now and Cas will be left with that poor excuse for a human wearing your face."

"I don't… Listen, man, it's not like I can actually do anything about it. I mean the other me is who he is – what do you expect me to do?"

"I expect you to get away from Cas before it got out of hand. It's been hard on him, don't you get it? Losing that other you and still seeing him every single day! Being forced to be around and see the man you have become without being able to do anything. He tried again and again and again and every time he failed it broke him more and more. And now you come and you're a reminder of whom he fought so hard to get back, whom he lost! You'll leave and he'll break again. Again!"

"Mike." There's a quiet voice from the doorway and we both look at him. "That's enough."

"No Cas, it's not. You know I'm right."

Cas looks at him for a moment longer and smiles sadly.

"I know who he is. I know our leader is not going to miraculously change back into my friend. It's alright."

"Yeah, and will it be alright when you OD again?" Mike hisses and I feel the dread I don't think I felt before. "Will it be alright when you're in a coma for a week again and that asshole won't even come to see if you're alive?"

"That's enough." Cas repeats calmly.

"Yeah okay, it's enough." Mike retorts desperately. "You know where to find me when the shit hits the fan again."

He strides off and Cas sighs.

"Sorry about that," he shakes his head, "he just worries too much."

"You ODed?" I ask staring at him.

"It was just an accident. Mike got it blown out of proportions."

"Coma for a week? Seriously?"

"Yeah, well, I made a mistake. I wasn't trying to OD, it was an accident." He dismisses it. "Besides, I've learned my lesson – pills are not to be consumed in handfuls!"

"Dammit Cas!"

"I didn't know, okay? How was I supposed to know?"

"Is he right? Is me being here tough on you?"

"No, Mike just worries too much. I'm way past caring about the leader. He's lost." He says, but I know Cas. Even if he's not Castiel anymore, I think I can spot his lie when I see it. I don't want to push him though – the other me is definitely not someone I want to talk about. I think about what Mike said for a moment longer. Then I look at Cas with a grin.

"If you ask me, that Mike guy is freakin' in love with you."

"I won't ask you then." He chuckles. "It's not true though, Mike's a friend. But now you do get how the general consensus Mike and I are together was reached in this camp?"

"Yeah, I get it alright!" I grin. "If you hadn't shown up, I'm pretty sure he'd have started peeing at the corners of the room, marking his territory."

Cas laughs at that. "Good thing he didn't come earlier, then. Might as well have peed on me to stop you from cuddling."

"Argh, not cool, man!" I groan, but I can't help but laugh. Yeah, I'm sure Mike would've been pissed to see me curled around Cas. I would've liked to see that! It's petty and I know that, but the idea of Mike being all possessive of Cas annoys me – Cas is my family and even though this Cas is so different from the one I know, he's also very much alike. There's this fierceness about him, behind all the bullshit and all the pain he is still the guy who can look at you and you're smited. Or is it smitten? Whatever. "Cas, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, what's up?"

"You say you and Mike are not together as in together, but have you ever… You know, been with a guy? Not Mike, I mean… Any guy." It's so not my business, but I just can't stop myself from asking.

He chuckles seeing how uncomfortable I am at all this.

"It's weird for you, isn't it?" He asks with a smirk. "Yeah, okay. Yes, I've had sex with a guy. Not Mike though, as I told you – he's my family."

"Okay." I stammer. Cas, of all people! He'd nearly choked at the whorehouse and in this life he's been experimenting! "It's weird, alright. The version of you I remember freaked out over a whore and here you are – smoking weed, popping pills, shoving your tongue down month chick's throat and apparently being into dudes too."

"Gender roles in sexuality mean very little to me. Sex is the extension or rather the form of my father's love given to humans as one of his many gifts and as such it was not meant to be judgmental or restrictive. People devised the rules and passed judgment on what is normal and what isn't – it has nothing to do with sexuality my father created. And apparently I'm angel enough not to obey the rules humans impose." He smiles. "Or to put it in simple words – whatever ticks. And yes, dudes tick for me."

"Yeah, okay, I get it." I nod and then mutter under my breath. "It's still weird. You, of all people."

"Alright, Dean. I think it's time for you to see what's happening behind the walls of my cabin. Zachariah brought you here for a reason after all." He says suddenly. "Besides, I assume you're starving by now?"

"You damn right I am!" I agree and as on cue my stomach rumbles.

"Ah, you got excited!" He smirks. "That is so adorable!"

"Shut up! I want to eat!"

"Yeah, well how about you tell me if you're still excited when you see what passes for a food for mere mortals here?" He laughs. "Come on, let's go eat."