I groaned as I glanced over at the raven haired boy the next day during our public speaking class. He was doing his usually thing, scribbling down note after note in his slightly beat up, but otherwise neat spiral notebook. He noticed the noise and sent me a glance and I quickly looked down at my blank sheet of paper.

Mi amigo, Lo, just couldn't possibly understand the way I felt about him, could he? I shook my head at the thought, and I could see Logan giving me another look as he raised his eyebrow at me. I pretended not to notice but quickly stayed lost in my thoughts. Tomas was right, I needed to tell Lo that I'm gay like he is...at least. It might make him more comfortable around me, and then I could, ya know, warm up to telling him everything. I shuddered at the thought of rejection and tried to refocus on the lesson.

The bell rang, and even though I tried to make a break for it Logan was in front of me before I could even get out of my chair, "Los what's wrong?" Lo was frowning at me and he looked like he might cry again if I didn't give him an answer.

I sighed, "I-I just want to tell you something...but this isn't the time or place for that. And it's um kind of big...and I'm just nervous."

The "bad boy" leaned down and brought me into a hug, "I'm sure there isn't a thing you could tell me that would scare me away.." Logan drew back and looked me in the eyes, and I could feel that familiar butterfly hurricane forming in the pit of my stomach.

The warning bell rang and our moment was momentarily ruined. Logan turned back to his desk and grabbed his backpack, "Want me to walk you to your next class Los?" He looked over his shoulder at me as I stood and grabbed my own bag.

I shook my head gently, "No it's okay. I'll do a little thinking in the hallway."

Logan gave me a half smile. A smile that meant he supported me and that he would wait patiently for me to open up to him, and I couldn't help but smile back before leaving the classroom. It was so different, the way I felt for him. I just couldn't understand how one face, one smile, and two hoyuelos could change my life as quickly as they had.

As I walked down the hallway I avoided the usual rowdiness, it wasn't hard to blend in at this school, but then I saw him, Hortencia was waiting by my classroom for me. I huffed and turned to walk the other way, I didn't care if I was late to class, I didn't want to talk to my "best" amigo about anything.

Maybe I hadn't been able to see it before, but meeting Lo showed me that Hortencia isn't as nice as I thought he was.

"Carlos wait!"

I heard the voice behind me and it wasn't so easy to get away from it when the number of people in the hallway was dropping rapidly. I sighed as I just stopped walking and turned to face Hortencia, "¡Cómo! Lo Hortencia? ¿Tiene algo más que decir mierda sobre Logan? " ["What! What Hortencia? Do you have some more shit to say about Logan?"].

Hortencia flinched at the sound of me yelling and there were a few teachers in the hall telling us to hurry to our classes before they went into their own rooms and closed their doors to begin class.

"No, no. No tengo nada que decir sobre medio Logan. Te echo de Carlos. Eres mi mejor amiga y todos estos combates es estúpido. Sé que soy la causa, así que estoy listo para simplemente lo entiendan y se detendrá. Estoy celosa de que Logan se ha convertido en su nuevo mejor amigo tan rápido. No quise decir nada de esas cosas hirientes que dije de él .. o sobre usted." [No, no. I don't have anything mean to say about Logan. I miss you Carlos. You're my best friend and all of this fighting is stupid. I know I'm the one causing it, so I'm ready to just suck it up and stop. I'm just jealous that Logan has become your new best friend so fast. I didn't mean any of those hurtful things I said about him..or about you.]

Hortencia sighed and looked down at the ground, I could hear it in his voice that he meant every word. Of course, being the Carlos Garcia my madre and papi raised me to be, I forgave him instantly. I brought him in for a hug and I knew he would understand he was forgiven.

"Usted no tiene que estar celoso de Lo. Quiero que ustedes dos como mis mejores amigos. De hecho, quiero que ustedes ser los mejores amigos también." [You don't have to be jealous of Lo. I want both of you as my best friends. In fact, I want you guys to be best friends too."

I could feel Hortencia shake his head while we hugged, "Él nunca quiere ser mi amiga. Lo arruiné." [He'll never want to be friends with me. I ruined it.]

I began walking back to my class, Hortencia at my side, "Sí que lo hará. Lo va a encantar tenerte como amigo. Él tiene un gran corazón." [Yes he will. Lo will love to have you as a friend. He's got a great heart.]

Hortencia simply nodded his head, he looked at my classroom door and then back at me, "Nos vemos más tarde?"

I nodded my head and responded, "Si!" before opening the door to my class and walking in, I apologized to my teacher and took my seat.

Finally, my two friends might finally have a chance at becoming friends themselves.

I took a chance and watched the way Logan was swinging at the park the way he looks at his textbooks and his homework. I started at the simple rhythm of his feet, whoosh forward, five seconds pass, whoosh backwards, I sighed as I tried to ignore how I had a gentle view of Logan's arm muscles tightened and released as his hands would squeeze the chains to give him a little extra lift. And I certainly tried to ignore the path my eyes took, as they traveled up Logan's neck and stopped at his cheeks, admiring the dimples that brought on the natural disaster in my stomach. And I promise, I really did try to ignore those pouty lips as Logan turned to face me, he had them curved into the most beautiful smile, white teeth showing through and I mentally sighed as our eyes met while Logan swung back and forth beside me.

"Los! Come on, swing a little, it'll help your mind." Logan chuckled and I tried very hard to put that sound as deep in my memory as I could. I obeyed the genius though and began to move my legs, and he was rightm it helped me sort through my thoughts.

Logan stayed silent, knowing I needed a little bit of peace and when I stopped swinging he stopped with me, "Lo?"

He looked up at me and I couldn't help but blurt it out, "I'm gay." I sighed and rubbed my hands against my thighs nervously. I hadn't said this out loud to anyone, mom and Tomas had just accepted it without me ever having to admit it for everyone to hear.

Logan stayed quiet for a time. A long time it felt like and suddenly I was nervous again. I felt myself beginning to shake and before I had time to calm myself down Logan was in front of me, arms wrapped tight around me, stilling the small quakes my body was making.

"I'm glad I won't be the only one in the whole school." Lo chuckled into my neck and I could feel the stubble he had gained from a few days without shaving rubbing against my neck. "But Los, you didn't have to be nervous to tell me that. Like I said, you're my friend no matter what. My best friend no matter what."

So there we were, two gay best friends hugging in the park, and suddenly I felt so immensely happy that Logan had been the first person I had actually "come out" to on my own. It felt right. I didn't want the moment to end, and I didn't want him to move his arms away just yet.

But of course, the moment had to draw to an end.

Logan moved back and held his hand out for me to take, I blinked unsure of what I should do before I took the larger hand. Logan smiled at me, "I think this calls for ice cream at the Garcia household!"

I laughed as I tried to hold onto the hand of the person I was most captivated with for a little while. Surprisingly, Lo didn't pull apart the whole trip back to my house. We just chatted and walked, hand in hand, and I hoped he couldn't sense how nervous this made me. But inside I felt like a teenage girl. This was what it felt like to believe someone had been made to make you extremely happy.

When we got to my house Lali and Lia practically tackled Logna to the ground screaming, "Logwan where have you been?" and "We missed you!" while giving him a few hugs and kisses on the cheek. Logan chuckled and picked both girls up, one in each arm and carried them to the kitchen. I smiled as the girls giggled as Logan sat them down on the counter and asked if they had been giving my abuelo a hard time.

The girls shook their heads before giggling more, "No Logwan, we were good girls!"

Logan smiled at them and pulled two chocolate chip cookies out of his backpack, "Well then I guess you guys deserve these! My mom made them especially for you."

The girls smiled and said, "Thwank you," before opening the baggies and having their snack.

"Really Lo, bribing them with cookies?" I shook my head as I walked over to the girls and helped them off the counter while Logan pulled out more cookies.

"Well I brought enough for you, your mom and Tomas, but if you don't want themmm." Logan sang the last word and I smacked him in the arm.

"Of course we want the cookies!" Logan and I both turned our heads to see Tomas standing in the doorway smirking. He walked over and grabbed a cookie from Logan, "Thanks bro, tell mama Mitchell thanks for me too. I know they're gonna be excellent."

I noticed Logan blush bit and he tried to look down to hide it, but it didn't go unnoticed by me, or my Tomas either apparently. Tomas gave me a wink and left the room leaving me and Logan alone again.

I turned to the raven haired boy who was looking at me too, and I felt a nervous twitch in my stomach again. But that was gone as soon as Lo gave me a light punch in the stomach, "No need to be weird now that we both know that we're gay" He chuckled and grabbed my hand again and started pulling me to my room upstairs, "Come on, I'll help you with your speech."

We were sitting on my floor and Logan had pulled out all of his notes and spread them around us. Of course this week's speech was to be based on telling when you took a chance or wanted to take a chance and how it changed your life and advice you would give to the class about taking chances.

Lo and I agreed it was a little cheesy, but we also agreed it could be a good bonding moment for the class.

Lo pulled out a smaller notebook and a pen and looked up at me. His brows were furrowed and I knew he was in academic mode.

"So Los, what are you thinking you should write your speech about? Just give me a few ideas."

I sighed as a wide range of ideas all flowed through my mind, most of them concerning Lo, "Um, maybe something about my dad..and his funeral and how I've had to step up around my house..."

Logan nodded, "I think that would be a great speech." He looked up from his notes and gave a sideways smirk before looking down again, "Anything else?"

I pushed my eyebrows together, trying to find the words for what I really wanted to say, "I-uh, there's this guy I've liked, and um, I guess this is more along the lines of a chance you've wanted to take. I've-I've wanted to tell him how I felt for a few weeks now, but I'm really nervous.."

I could see Lo's face turning red and his pen stopped moving for a few seconds before starting up again, "Why are you so nervous to tell him?...if you want to tell me."

I started to do the nervous thing, where I rubbed my hands against my thighs, "I-I don't want him to think that I'm weird or stupid. I don't want him to look at me different. I don't want to be rejected, I'm no good at handling it.."

Logan nodded his head and looked up at me again, "Yeah...I know the feeling..Do you think you'll ever tell him?"

I sat there for a while, starring off into space, before coming up with an answer, "Maybe one day. I just want to know without a doubt it's the right thing you know?"

Lo nodded, "Yeah, sometimes it's hard to take a chance...you never know what it'll lead to. The unknown kind of scares me. I know a lot of things, formulas, words, species of animals, but even I don't know the future. There's no book or website for that..."

With that we stayed silent for a while and I glanced up at Logan and found that he was again, already looking at me, "Thank you Lo, for not making fun of me for being a big chicken..."

"You're not a chicken Los...but I think you can add in your speech how difficult it is sometimes taking chances, but in the end how the journey is what makes us who we are.."

I sat thinking again for a little while before looking at Lo, "I think I'd rather give the speech about Papi...it'll be easier. Plus I love being able to tell people that he was a great man."

Lo simply nodded his head and put his notebook to the side before crawling over to me and giving me a hug, "You're a strong guy Los, and whoever this guy is, he's lucky. Some people would kill to have someone as caring as you fall for them."

I returned the hug, maybe I hugged Logan back a little too long, but in the end our faces were just a few inches apart and he was smiling at me and he said quietly, "I know I love having you as my friend."

And as the words left his lips I wanted to dive in for a simple kiss, to see if those fireworks people talked about existed.

But as usual, I held back, those few inches lingered and I simply said back to Logan, "I love having you as my friend too." Even though every ounce of my brain was screaming for me to say "NO I DON'T WANT YOU TO LOVE ME AS A FRIEND. I WANT YOU TO JUST LOVE ME"

Logan moved back to his spot on the floor, "Well now that we figured out what you're going to talk about, if you write a rough draft I'll read yours and you can read mine..."

I smiled at my smart friend, grabbed a notebook of mine and a pencil and went to work.

An hour later, Logan was wrapping up a few edits to my speech and I was finishing up my math homework. Of course Logan had finished all his work about twenty minutes ago and ever since then he had been looking over my assignments. The silence was comfortable and I took advantage of it. Working kept me distracted from my feelings, but now that it was coming to an end, I couldn't help but look up at Logan.

He glanced up from my speech, "Done Los?"

I nodded my head and closed my math book, "For now" For the first time I noticed the smell coming in my doorway, "Dude, it smells like mom is home and she's making something excellent."

Logan chuckled as he put his books in his backpack. "Yeah it does smell really awesome." He stood up and slipped the backpack on.

I stood up next to him, realizing that he was s few inches taller than me, "Lo you know you can stay for dinner right? I'm sure she made enough for you too. Lali and Lia would have for sure let her know you were here."

Lo laughed, "I thought you would never ask me!" He slipped his backpack back off and wrapped his left arm around my shoulders and led me out of my room. "Let's go grub."

I laughed and subconsciously snuggled into Logan's arm as we walked, "Don't ever say grub in a sentence again."

Logan pretended to be hurt by my statement and pretended to wipe a tear away, "What? My best friend doesn't like my jokes?"

I shook my head playfully and he sighed, "Fine," he said as he laughed a little with me as we entered the kitchen and he lowered his arm. "It sure smells good in here ..I mean Sylvia!"

Mi madre laughed as she put dinner on the table, "Well I sure hope Los told you that you were invited to have dinner with us." She looked over at me and I could have sworn she winked but it happened so fast I wasn't sure. But that didn't stop the blush from creeping up my cheeks.

"Of course I told him he could stay mom!" I sat in one of the chairs surrounding our table and Lo sat next to me. Mom served the girls first and passed the food around the table to each of us and once again it already felt like Logan had been welcomed into my family. It even seemed like Papi liked him for me. He hadn't sent me a sign that he felt otherwise.

At the end of dinner, Lo and I cleaned up the kitchen while mom and Tomas put the girls to bed. I washed the dishes and Lo dried them and once we were done we put them up together. I couldn't help but playfully splash a little water on Logan and he smacked me in the arm with the towel a few times.

"Dinner was really nice Los. I love being with your family."

"Well they love having you around! Clearly Lali and Lia think you're better than me and Tomas combined."

Logan shook his head as we walked to my front door, "Nah, they love you guys way too much for that..." He opened the door and turned around to face me, "Your speech is going to be amazing. I think you did a really good job on it, I'm sure you'll get an A!" Logan was doing is intense happy academic related smile and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Well it'll all be due to my friend Logan!"

Logan shook his head, "No, no. It's all you bro. I barely changed anything...your Papi must be very proud of you." Logan turned a pinkish color at the mention of my Papi but I couldn't help but smile because he realized how important my dad had been to me.

"I know he is. Thank you though Logan." I pulled him in for a quick hug before shoving him out onto the porch, "Now get home before your wonderful mother starts to wonder where you are!"

After shutting the door and moving up the steps, I realized just how exhausted today had made me. I felt good about telling Lo I was gay, but I still felt like I should have just told him the whole truth...I was just too scared.

Just then Tomas appeared in the hallway next to me, "Did you tell him Los?"

I nodded my head but bit my lip nervously. "So you told him...but you didn't TELL him, did you?"

I shook my head and he smacked his forehead with his hand, "The boy like you, me and mom were saying so as we tucked the girls in. Just go for it Los."

"Just go for it Los"

The words Tomas had spoken were etched into my mind as I settled into bed and glanced over at my Papi's helmet. Tomorrow I would try to "go for it" a little better, and who knows what the future holds right? Maybe it was a future that contained me s a successful police officer with Lo at my side as more than a best friend.

I smiled at the thought and spoke out loud to no one but myself, "Tomorrow. Tomorrow I'll at least hint to him a little better how I feel."