Chapter Four
By RubberLotus
Get your facts first, and then you can distort 'em as much as you please.
- Mark Twain
Neither Chao nor Hakase were much considered the social type. Of the two, Chao was undoubtedly more prone to joking and easier to get along with, but even she carried a certain air of aloofness with her cheery smiles; even as she hocked meat buns at the Chao Bao Zi. And, of course, neither of them cared all that much about the gossip that 3-A was constantly drowning in, ninety percent of which involved some variant of "X is going out with Y! Squee!"
Once, Haruna had actually started a rumor that the department was planning to slash the academy's research budget, just to see how they'd respond. What resulted was a month-long campaign of bribery, madness, blackmail, more madness, spying, still more madness, and lots and lots of people getting kicked in the face whenever a new, tide-changing "fact" popped up. The only "gain" from the whole experience - and even Chao wasn't sure how it happened - was the establishment of a Grant Morrison hate-club with about a third of the teachers, Negi-sensei included, as members. And only about two of them had even heard of the name...
It was the only time they'd paid attention to any news Haruna had rattled off. A pity that they hadn't even attended classes, let alone heard her latest "discoveries", for the past few weeks...
"SURPRISE!"
The two professors stood stock-still, unsure of how to respond to the mass of balloons, streamers, food, and party games lining the inside of 3-A. The eternally cheery faces of their classmates, most of them clad in party hats and casual clothing, confused them even more.
Then their eyes drifted to the pink, frilly banner lining the top of the wall and all became clear.
It's a girl.
Somehow, word had gotten out, even when they'd left the robot back at the facility.
And somehow, their intrepid classmates had managed to arrange a baby shower.
And somehow...
"Hakase?"
"Yes?"
"What's your family's take on having a kid out of wedlock?"
"They're happy when I so much as look at a boy."
"Good," Chao nodded, noting that several of her classmates were looking the two of them over as if deciding their respective tuxedo and dress sizes.