HEY EVERYBODY! I know, I kind of disappeared for a bit, but this took FOREVER TO WRITE. I got stuck like 15 times and I think I'm happy with parts of it and other parts... ASDFGHJKL:! Okay. SO quick thing. I"M SORRY ABOUT SASUKE! IT'LL GET BETTER SOON! But you'll be pretty happy with the way this ends so. YEAH.
"What?!" yelled nearly every female member of the student body. Tenten was one of the few that didn't shout out, but even she was surprised and a bit annoyed. She usually got advanced warnings for when Ino would drag her out shopping. None of the boys said anything either, but still, one week to ask a girl out was a lot of pressure.
Well not none of the boys. Naruto made some exclamation, that no one paid much attention to. He asked Hinata to go with him right after first period. Hinata blushed really hard but to her credit she didn't stammer one bit when she gave her reply. They walked arm in arm to Chemistry. Before he started running for his class, he gave her one last glance that positively threw Ino into hysterics.
Why hysterics? Ino still hadn't been asked out. Why would this be a problem, especially since it had only been ONE period? Because Ino was a crazy person and said that she had to dress to match her date. Until she had one she couldn't begin planning her wardrobe for the event.
"Wardrobe?" Sophia asked, taken aback. "Isn't it just one dress? Why are you saying it like it's all you'll be wearing for the next 10 years?"
Sakura sighed like it was going to take a tedious amount of explanation. "Ino here, suffers from the delusion that one must plan a wardrobe for every event in one's life. This might be fine if everything we were doing right now was being choreographed by some puppet master typing out all of our actions on some massive printing press, but I mixed too many metaphors to make a point."
Sophia shook her head, not really getting it. "Okay… What clothes do you need then?"
"Well I need an outfit for the day of to wear to school. Then I need one for getting ready in case he stops by early. Then I need the actual dress and all the accessories to go with it. Which not only has to match him but has to look at least decent when we're taking pictures together. Then I need clothes to change into after. And then I need just in case clothes for all of those. Because what if something spills or rips or matches someone else."
"She's not joking is she?" No one had to answer. They spent the rest of the class discussing idea's and gossip about the dance while Tenten scowled every time someone mentioned shopping.
Sakura wondered whether she should hold out for an invitation from Sasuke or try to move on.
"So unless you want to keep crying in bathrooms and ripping each other's heads off every time you see the other, maybe you should cut him some slack. And if you can't do that, then get over him. Find someone else if you can't deal with your trust issues."
The entire next period passed with her thinking about it. Brooding was closer to what she was doing, but it isn't as though she would ever admit it. The choice was a simple one, but she still hadn't made any headway by the time they had gone to lunch. She was sitting at a double table with everyone there, because Naruto and Hinata were together and Ino wanted to talk to "the boys" (Shikamaru) about the dance and what they're plans were. And nobody really felt like making a fuss. So everyone was there to see Lee walk up to Sakura and announce… ask? It was both really. "Sakura, My Cherry Blossom! My Youthful Flower Of Spring! Will You Join Me At The Dance Of Beauty This Friday?! And We Can Celebrate Our Vitality Together!" Everyone in the cafeteria was watching now, straining to hear exactly what Sakura said before bursting into uncontrollable laughter. 'Everyone' was surprised.
"Yes." She had been a bit surprised herself, but she decided Sophia had been right. Everyone had been right. She should get over Sasuke. She smiled. "Rock Lee, I would love to go to the dance with you on Friday." She and Lee talked over the details of picking each other up and so forth, and he walked away punching his fists into the air. Sakura turned herself back to face the table at large. They were all staring, wide-eyed and incredulous.
Ino was the first to speak. "Sakura. I understand you're at an emotional junction at this point, but you could do a lot better than Rock Lee."
"Ino…" started Tenten.
"Why? Rock Lee is anything but indifferent," Sakura said pointedly. "I imagine we'll have a pretty lively evening."
Hinata smiled and glanced up at Naruto, imagining the kind of huge stunt he might pull. Yes, lively, was the politest way to put it… "Good for you Sakura."
Sophia had decided to keep herself out of anything and everything to do with Sakura's love life, but a 'good for you' wouldn't hurt. And she said so as did Tenten, and Ino, though grudgingly. Ino was really hoping she could get Sakura and Sasuke to get together as quickly as possible and it this dance would have been such a good opportunity. 'Oh well,' she thought.
In the next class, the boys were playing dodgeball while the girls ran relays. Sasuke and Gaara had been knocked out and sat next to each other. Sakuke suddenly burst out. "What a bitch!"
Gaara followed his line of sight to the girls. They were grouped all together, talking about whatever. Gaara guessed. "Who, Sakura?"
"No! Sophia." Gaara looked even more confused at this, but he waited. "I mean you heard her. Lecturing me like I'm some sort of… you know. Telling me that I had a chance if I just worked at it. But nooo Sakura is a precious angel who really needs to be taken away from bad influences like me. She doesn't need to change at ALL. I mean you heard her earlier, telling Sakura how happy she was Sakura was going out with someone else. I mean what a bitch. She tells me one thing and Sakura another. I mean she doesn't give a damn. She just gave her self-righteous little speech and walked out, not really caring what anyone did about it. Not caring how it might all turn out or how anyone might feel. What a bitch to make someone try that hard about something she doesn't give two shits about."
Gaara exhaled. "Don't."
Sasuke almost forgot he was there. "What?"
"Don't talk like you know what's going on in her head."
"Oh and you do? Oh that's right, I forgot you two are all buddy-buddies now. I didn't realize that wanting to get into a girl's pants is justification for siding against your best friend."
Gaara's face flushed. Sasuke wondered whether it was due to anger or embarrassment for only a moment before Gaara started in on him. "Several things are so wrong about what you just said. I do actually know what's going on in her head about this and she has a clearer picture than you do about "what's best." Two, I don't want to "get into her pants." Three, isn't "getting into a girl's pants" what this whole thing is about anyway, you wanting to be with Sakura? And four, if you had been paying attention, you'd have noticed Sophia's your friend too. But you're too busy playing the victim to realize she's trying to help both of you."
"I'm playing the victim, Gaara? Really? Between a girl who has railroad tracks carved into her legs and me, I'm the one who's acting the victim."
"I don't want to punch you, Sasuke, but if you don't shut the hell up about things you don't know anything about, I will."
"Oh so you're defending an emo against your best friend. That's cool."
"You know the fact that you're only bringing up the fact that we're best friends so that I'll side with you, isn't helping you much. So if you'd just calm the fuck down, you'd get that she fucking cares about you, and she gave what she felt was good advice, even if you disagree. She never said you had to follow it. She never said Sakura had to follow whatever she told her either. And believe me when I say she gave Sakura a piece of her mind. Sakura was the one that decided to go out with Lee this Friday. Sophia didn't force her hand."
Sasuke didn't say anything to that. Someone caught a ball and Gaara got back into the game.
Over the next couple days Sophia had watched nearly a dozen boys pour their hearts out to Ino, Tenten, and even Hinata and Sakura, despite them being taken. It was quite distressing when she finally understood that she had joined the popular group without realizing it. Popular if you defined it as the group that the most people knew and liked. It was a weird feeling. She had always been part of the nerdy group or the theatre group (or the otaku group). It was even weirder when someone asked her out by proxy. She had the feeling that he had come up to ask Hinata and after seeing Naruto and Neji's death glares he had asked her just so he didn't look so stupid. She turned him down nicely enough, but he didn't look that put out to be honest.
A couple others turned up to ask her out, but she turned them down. She knew it was a dance, but she didn't really feel like going with someone just to not be single. Not yet. Tenten turned down all her suitors too, but I think that was just more to annoy Ino than anything else. Ino eventually settled on someone Sophia thought was named Deidara, but she couldn't be sure since every time Ino mentioned him she called him "Dei."
On Wednesday Ino took everyone shopping. It would have been a nightmare if they had gone shopping in Konoha, but when Ino "took someone shopping," she literally took them. They were in first class on a flight to Tokyo before Tenten could say "quadruple homicide."(Yes I know Japan isn't very big so maybe a plane ride is unnecessary and they could have just taken a train, but screw it!) Sophia began wondering how Tokyo was going to be any less busy, but Ino had reserved them time alone in some of the most prestigious shops in the entire city. In the face of the intimidating shop assistants, Sophia suddenly became very conscious of the fact that the sweatshirt she was wearing was about 3 years old and torn-up at the wrists.
Every single piece of clothing in all of the stores they visited was absolutely gorgeous. Sure, it might not have matched everyone's style very well, but it certainly would have matched with someone. Not for a single item could even Ino, with all of her shrewd fashion sense, turn to Sakura and mouth, "ew," which is a lot of what shopping was. It wasn't really just trying on all the good stuff but pointing out all of the disastrously hideous things one saw in a store that was the real joy. So in a sense, this shopping experience was less fun than usual, but then again, Ino had planned it to be business, because for Ino, getting a dress for a dance meant BUSINESS. Ino marched through stores searching through every rack of clothing and meticulously looking for every dress that might have worked for someone. Luckily none of them had to carry any of their potential dresses. Ino had gotten the shop assistants to carry everything she found to the fitting rooms.
Tenten kind of stood off to one side, moving along when Ino told her to, but in general keeping out of the way. She was resigned to put up with it all, knowing that if she just shut up and complied with it, it would be over much faster. So she didn't look for anything like Sakura and Hinata had begun to do, but tried on all the things Ino made her, and decided to end up getting whatever Ino thought to get, just to avoid getting into a troublesome row. 'Wow. I sound like Shikamaru,' she thought.
Sophia walked through the racks and started looking through the racks like Sakura and Hinata had done. She found a dress that she felt might look nice on her and pulled it out. An assistant immediately came out to take it. She was about to hand it over when she noticed the price tag. Her heart sank. There was no way she'd be able to afford anything in that store, or probably any of the stores if the price of that one dress was anything to go by. She sighed and gave it to the assistant. There was no harm in trying it on. Sophia would just humor Ino, and then not end up getting anything. She could wear one of the dresses she already had in her closet. It wasn't as though anyone had seen her wear them anywhere.
When it came to trying on the dresses picked out for Sophia, she almost started crying they were so pretty. And there wasn't a flying pig's chance in hell she could afford any of them. After about the third one, Ino cried out saying, "Oh, Sophia we have to get this one! I won't take no for an answer. I don't think we could find anything better in a million years. And if we do, you can wear it to the next dance."
'Uhhhh,' thought Sophia. "Uhm. Ino, I think I'm just going to wear a dress I already own…"
"Nonsense! You can't wear a dress more than once."
"Um yeah, but." She lowered her voice so the shop assistants wouldn't hear. "Listen, Ino. I can't afford this dress. I don't think I could afford any of these dresses…"
Ino wrinkled her brow at this and checked the price tag. She looked at Sophia with a contemplative expression on her face. "Here. I'll buy it for you. There's no way I'm letting this dress go."
"Ino, really. It's fine. I don't want to impose, especially after you flew us out here and everything already. I truly appreciate the gesture but I can't accept."
Ino frowned and made that face again. "Fine. Miss," she called to one of the assistants. "Yes, can you ring one of these up for me? Thank you."
"In this size?"
"Yes. I think we're about the same size, aren't we Sophia?"
"Uh. Ino what are you doing?"
"Well you won't accept it as a gift, so I'm buying it for myself. You're going to borrow it on the night of the dance. That's an order."
Sophia bit her lip to keep from smiling, without much success. "Yes, ma'am!"
The rest of the evening went without incident. Ino bought a dozen other dresses just for herself, and Sophia couldn't imagine when she'd have time to wear them all. Everyone managed to find something incredibly gorgeous to wear and even Tenten couldn't think of a bad word to say about her dress. They laughed the entire plane ride back and collapsed in Ino and Sakura's dorm room.
Those last few days had gone a bit differently for Gaara. On Monday night, Sasuke came back around 10, stopping only to grab a snack from the fridge and then slam the door to his bedroom behind him. On a normal day Gaara might have asked, "What the hell's your problem?" On a normal day he might have tried to get his roommate to fess up. On a normal day, Gaara might have actually cared what was Sasuke's deal was, but today he couldn't care less. It just added to the growing resentment he started feeling since their argument earlier.
On Tuesday, Gaara watched a parade of guys approach their table to ask out the girls. The fifth or so boy to come up had been looking at Hinata like he wanted to talk to her. Gaara felt Neji tense up beside him and glare at this new guy, who flinched so bad he might have fell over. He looked around the table at all the girls and spotted Sophia. "Um.. would you like to go to the dance with me this Friday?" he stammered out glancing back nervously at Neji. Gaara felt a shift in opinion of this boy shift from a non-entity to the lowest of the low. Gaara leaned forward and took in a breath. He could feel himself actually sigh when he heard Sophia reject him.
He heard as if through water Ino bug Sophia about getting a date. Sophia said she didn't feel like going with someone that she didn't know just so that she wouldn't look pathetic without a date. Gaara hadn't heard a word. During his reverie, he didn't notice Shikamaru note his every move.
Sasuke didn't mention the argument from the previous day nor did he slam his door. But he refused to speak to Gaara unless he had to and even then most of his sentences consisted of 'hn.' Sasuke's bad mood went so far that by Wednesday, even Shikamaru was muttering about how he'd lost it. Here's why. Karin and her group of crazed stalkers stopped by to not so subtly hint that the boy's should ask them out. She actually said, "Gosh, Sasuke, when are you going to stop teasing me and ask me out already?"
Sasuke was just about to tell her to jump off a weather balloon, when he stopped and in a moment of complete insanity said, "It's Karin right? Karin squealed, over the moon that Sasuke actually remembered her name. She nodded vigorously. "How about I pick you u—"
Shikamaru, who realized what Sasuke was going to say about a second before everyone else, shoved him with his elbow. Sasuke shot him a look like, 'what the hell?' But Shikamaru just glared back.
"Well Sasuke, what were you about say?"
Neji stepped in. "He was just going to say that he would pick you up a mask, so that when you ask out the next poor sap, he won't be blinded." Sasuke now looked at Neji in the same way. Neji just glared back. There was no way in hell he was going to be stuck with those girls for the night of the dance.
Karin dropped her mouth open in astonishment. She hissed at Neji, "I wasn't talking to you." She then turned to Sasuke and said sweetly, "Well, Sasu-kun?" This more than anything snapped Sasuke out of it.
"What Neji said. Get lost Kaori."
"It's Karin!" she shouted before stomping off, her friends trailing in her wake. They looked longingly back at the group of boys. Clearly they had hoped for an invite to the dance as well.
That night everyone but Sasuke, who was off brooding (drinking), gathered in Gaara's apartment. "What is his problem? We almost ended up with those girls hanging around us for that whole dance!" yelled Neji.
Shikamaru assumed his 'O' stance. "I imagine that if he had actually succeeded in asking her out, she would have roped him into making us take her friends. Damn troublesome. It would be less of a pain in the ass to go with Ino."
Neji smirked, privately thinking that Shikamaru would very much like to go out with Ino, no matter how much of a "pain in the ass" she might be.
Naruto spoke next. "I don't know how he could even think about going with her. She was so mean to Hinata and the other girls, including Sakura. Jesus. What do you think, Gaara?" For Gaara hadn't spoken a word on the subject.
"I don't know guys. It's probably because of Sakura. But if Sasuke's going to be a jackass, then I'm just going to let him from now on."
"What do you mean from now on?" asked Neji.
Gaara sighed and recounted their argument from Monday. There was a sharp intake of breath from the other three boys as Gaara finished his story.
"What an asshat," said anyone really. They were all thinking it.
"So what he's just acting like jerk because Sakura's going to the dance with Lee?" asked Naruto.
"Well it's like Sophia said that night of the sleepover. And he had the nerve to…"
Neji suppressed a smirk at that and said, "Well, there is one thing that I think Sasuke got right."
"What?" asked Naruto.
"That Gaara's got the hots for Sophia, numbskull," said Neji.
Now it was Gaara's turn. "What?"
Shikamaru answered. "Come on, Gaara. You nearly strangled every guy that asked her out to the dance this Friday."
Gaara was tired of everyone saying he had a thing for Sophia. Why couldn't two people just be close friends? "So did you and Neji when anyone tried to ask out Hinata!"
"I'm dating her! And Neji's her cousin. Of course he's going to be protective. Why are you?"
Gaara had nothing to say to this. Shikamaru decided to keep building on the argument. "If you're "just friends" then did you get angry at the guys who asked out Sakura or Tenten or Ino?"
Gaara had to admit that he hadn't really cared who the girls went out with. As long as he didn't have to hear anyone whining about it like Sasuke did.
Naruto picked up on it now. "Yeah. And I mean I know Sasuke is being an ass, but you threatened to punch him after he insulted her."
Gaara would of course admit that he cared about her, certainly, but in that way? He wasn't sure. He'd never liked anyone that way before. No matter how much his friends had teased him about it before, he hadn't really considered whether or not he liked her.
Just then Sasuke stalked in from wherever he had been, in just as bad a mood as ever.
The whole group gave a collective sigh. "I'm going to go, Gaara," said Naruto. Neji and Shikamaru gave their excuses and left too, but not without first giving Gaara significant looks.
It took Gaara a while to fall asleep that night, but eventually he did. In his dreams, he was kissing her. She was running her hands up his back, pulling his shirt up over his head. Soon her own joined his on the floor… Gaara woke up in the morning drenched in sweat.
During math that Thursday morning, Kakashi let them work in pairs as usual. He kept finding his eyes fixating on Sophia's face, her eyes, lips, the small dimples near her eyes that appear when she smiles. Sophia noticed his distraction, but not at all that it was directed at her. "Are you okay?" she asked. "You seem really out of it today."
He looked to her left to avoid looking in her eyes. "Oh. No. I'm fine."
She bit her lip, wanting to press him. "Okay. But you'll tell me if there's anything wrong?" He nodded. But his eyes kept drifting from his work back to her when she wasn't looking.
"Okay. I'll see you in Japanese," she said as she dashed out the door. He had been completely oblivious to the bell signaling the end of class.
'Okay, Gaara. This is getting stupid. You can't even concentrate in class.
What am I supposed to do?
Well, your first instinct would be to ignore it.
How can I ignore her?
Not ignore her. Just your feelings about her.
What feelings are those?
So you're telling me that you don't want to spend restless nights with her by your side? That you don't want to take her in your arms? Caress her? Kiss her? That you don't want her to kiss you back?
No… But what can I do?
I can't believe I'm this socially retarded. Why don't you, I don't know, tell her how you feel?
But—'
"Gaara?" asked Naruto. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah, you're less aware than Shikamaru," said Neji, pointing to a snoring Shikamaru.
"Just tired," he replied. Neji rolled his eyes.
He actually managed to concentrate on physics for the rest of the period, even if only to keep from thinking. His resolve was almost immediately broken when he saw her walk into Japanese. He found himself daydreaming about them being together. He could feel some sort of animal instinct make a sound down low in his throat like a purr or a growl. Then he began to deflate.
It was animalistic, the urges he felt, he thought. Even now, even now that he had admitted he was attracted to her, he felt a conflict. Even if she did feel something for him too, and it was a big if, he worried that he would hurt her. It wasn't that he thought she was weak. And it wasn't as though he thought he would hurt her on purpose. But he had never really stopped feeling like the monster everyone had told him he was when he was growing up. He had been blamed for his mother's death, for his father's unhappiness. It took him so long just to trust himself to be friends with Naruto, Sasuke, Shikamaru and Neji. And for the most part he had been able to let go of that anxiety. But in a tiny corner, locked away it told him that he was a cause of misery and suffering in the people that he cared about. And this was different than just friendship. A relationship like the one he wanted would require so much more vulnerability on her part. He wouldn't risk her safety on the chance he wouldn't end up hurting her. There was nothing to it. He'd just ignore it. Ignore every feeling, just to spare her.
And just as he reached this conclusion, the bell rang for lunch. He sighed. Lunch was excruciating. More boys came to ask the girls out, a last ditch attempt to get a date before the dance the next day. Every time he saw someone approach, even if he just went past the table to go get more food, Gaara felt a knot tighten in his stomach.
'Do you think she'd say yes if I asked her?' he wondered to himself.
'I thought you decided you weren't going to bother.'
And so his mind continued for the rest of the day, wanting to tell her, then snapping back to 'reality.' It was such a weird feeling for him. He'd never felt an attraction like he did now. When he'd seen girls before he just thought, "Yep, that's a girl." And that had been it. He had always known that he wasn't as socially normal as his friends, but it was still disconcerting when he thought about the newness of his feelings.
It was pretty late that evening, when Sasuke entered their apartment, slamming the door behind him. Gaara had been trying to sleep and though it was his own anxieties that had stopped him from sleeping, it still pissed him off that Sasuke would barge in here and act like such a dick.
So he stormed out of his room and banged on Sasuke's door. "What the hell is your problem?"
Sasuke opened the door so suddenly, Gaara almost fell forward. He didn't speak, but just glared at Gaara, almost daring him to keep yelling.
"You're acting like an insufferable child you know that? Slamming doors and pouting because you didn't get your way for once. Going off on your own for hours and drinking yourself stupid? No fucking wonder Sakura doesn't want to be around you. And you know what else? She's not the only one."
Sasuke just managed to hiss out amid very strong alcoholic vapors, "You done?"
"Yeah, I'm done. I'm done with you." And Gaara stormed out of their apartment, slamming the door.
Before he knew it, he had walked to Sophia's apartment, and begun to knock.
A knock at the door wakes her up. She stumbles to the door, half-heartedly wrapping her comforter around herself. "God, Ino. I thought we were done with this crap for today. I'll wear the tartan mini tomorrow with leggings." She rubbed her eyes and looked up. Gaara was looking at her, a troubled expression on his face. "Gaara! What's wrong?" she said, gesturing for him to come inside. She sat down with him on the couch, waiting for him to speak, but he didn't. She was about to ask when his eyes flitted from her face to her chest. She realized she was just in a bra and undies and hadn't bothered to cover any of it. "Jesus, I'm sorry Gaara. I'll be right back," and she dashed off, embarrassed as hell. She wasn't the only one.
In just a minute she came back in a fluffy blue sweatshirt and matching sweatpants, carrying two mugs of cocoa, a touch of pink on her cheeks. "Want some?" she offered, and he took it quietly. Her voice, already softened, became even gentler, but more serious as she said looking him dead in the eyes, "You don't have to say anything if you don't want to." With that, she leaned back into his chest sipping her hot chocolate, with a satisfied sigh. She twitched her eyes up, knowing that at her angle, she really couldn't see the expression on his face, but she was so desperately worried. 'Gaara, with that kind of expression, doesn't bode well. Calm down, it's probably just nightmares, the kind Gaara and I have all the time, he just needs a little reality check, to know everything is fine.'
"Listen, you're probably wondering why I showed up in the middle of the nigh-," he was cut off by her shaking her head. She turned to face him and smiled, "Gaara, we made a promise, that night in the hospital. I wouldn't care if it was the night before a huge test that was first thing in the morning- and you know I'm not a morning person-and I desperately needed to sleep. I'm there for you, even if you just need me to be next to you." She smiled and then squeaked out, "Because you're there for me too, right?" Her eyes were glistening with tears. Gaara watched as she blinked and one fell down her face. Before he could stop himself, he brushed it away with his thumb and simply said, "Always."
Sophia straightened up and shaking her head she got out, "Anyways, sorry, all ears."
Even though he'd come all the way to her, he felt a little uncomfortable telling her about his fight with Sasuke. "Sasuke and I got into a fight. I just wanted a place to crash, so I came here. You know what, no. I should go. I shouldn't have bothered you. I'll just leave. Sorry." And he actually got up.
It Sophia a moment to speak she was so caught off guard. "You're joking right? And where exactly are you supposed to be going?"
He turned around looking sheepish.
"I must be the worst friend ever if you thought I'd even consider letting you leave." He started to protest but she just held up a finger. "Listen. I've told you that it's fine. I really don't mind. In fact, I'm kind of glad that I'm not just relying on you, but that you trust me enough to come over in the middle of the night like this. Anyway, I don't have a roommate, so you can sleep in the other room if you want."
"Thanks." But he didn't look like he felt any less anxious or upset.
"Sit down." He obeyed. "Do you want to do something? Eat or play a video game or something? Just get your mind somewhere else? I've got *insert generic video game here*."
"Okay."
She gave a small smile. "Okay."
He smiled back and took a controller. Sophia mentioned, "So I suck at this game, but I'm pretty sure I remember the controls, so sorry if I make things a little slow. I'm more of a Nintendo girl myself." And then as if she had no pride whatsoever, she shouted, "Itsa me! MAARIO!" Her head sank, before even getting a glance at his expression. "Don't mind me. I'm just weird," she sighed into her controller before getting back to the game. They continued for a while, but she could tell that there was still something weighing on his mind. She bit her lip, not knowing whether she should offer something else or keep playing, but before she could decide, he looked up at her, a smile on his face, his eyes all confused.
She crouched down next to him and asked, "What's up?"
He answered with another question, "Why?"
She blinked. "What do you mean? Why does the earth's rotation take 24 hours? Why do subways inevitably smell like urine? Why do Twinkies never go bad? Or is it what I really think you mean. Why do I feel the way I feel and hurt the way I do? Why does life seem to suck away everything good that it gives you to later taunt it in your face when you try to get respite from the day?" Looking down, defeated, Sophia sighed. "I don't know."
"No. Why is it that I can hang out with such an amazing person? How is it that she opened her door for me in the middle of the night and invited me in to play video games? That's what I don't get. Why are you here for me?"
She smiled again, wider than she had done that whole night. "You are so silly." She ruffled his hair. "I told you less than an hour ago, in the middle of all this crap we call life, we need each other. We understand each other. And you know what else, we can count on each other when we can't count on anyone else, because we know what it's like when someone bails. So stop being stupid and just hit start already."
And then as an added afterthought she leaned over to kiss him on the cheek, but he moved her face slightly to the side where their lips met. Sophia was, at first freaking out. 'Holy crap. Holy Crap. HOLY CRAP! AHHH! and then: Oh my god. It's like I'm melting on his lips. This is so amazing I feel like I'm going to faint. And then it hit her: OH MY GOD! This is Gaara! What am I doing? I mean, it's not like I'm complaining or anything, but what if this screws up? If it does it will be so bad. I can't do that to him. We promised to be there for each other.' But before she got too far ahead of herself Gaara broke away.
She felt disappointed and to be honest a bit surprised. She looked to Gaara to try and figure out what was going on in his mind. But he'd turned his head away from her.
"Gaara?" No response. "Gaara, please look at me." He turned his head back around but he looked down at the floor. She grabbed his head from both sides of his face with her hands and pulled it up so she was looking straight into his eyes. "Hey. What's wrong?" He looked away and she dropped her hands.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that," he said, still not meeting her eyes.
"So… You didn't want to kiss me?"
"No… I did want to kiss you. That isn't it."
"Then what is it?" her voice cracked.
"It's just. I don't know. I really don't know. I am so confused because, well, if I admit it to myself, which I have to do now, I really like you and I have for quite a while, but at the same time you're the greatest friend I think I've ever had. And that promise that we made. I just keep weighing the options in my head, and I'm just so scared I'll hurt you. And then I'll lose you. I don't want to be selfish, but that scares me so much. And I don't want to be presumptuous or anything, but doesn't that scare you too?" He said all of this without meeting her gaze until the very end when he looked up into her eyes. He looked like a little kid, lost and scared. He wasn't sure she understood, but before he could take a breath to keep going she pulled him in for a kiss.
This one didn't last very long because she had something she needed to say. "I know. I'm scared to death, because well, now that I've known you, not knowing you would probably kill me. I'm making you another promise, that whatever happens, wherever this goes, even if it's nowhere. I'm here, with you. And if that means that was that, then so be it. But you know what I want?" He shook his head. "I want to kiss you. I want to hold you and touch you. I want to walk down hallways holding your hand. And I don't think that being afraid is a good enough excuse to miss any of that." She pulled back from the hug to look at him. "Well?"
He nodded. "Okay."
She smiled. "Okay." She gave him a quick peck then rearranged herself in his arms, leaning back into his chest and then grabbed her controller. "You ready to *insert generic video game action/goal*?" And they kept playing. Sophia finally gave a long yawn and curled up like a cat on Gaara's lap, controller still in hand. She glanced half-heartedly at the screen, closed her eyes and pressed her thumb to make the joystick go forward, ending up running into a wall. Gaara paused the game and waited for her to fall asleep before gently pulling the controller from her grip, lifted her up bridal style and placed her on her bed. Deciding she might get cold she pulled a comforter from her closet and draped it over her. Gaara kissed her forehead and left, but not before silencing her phone and un-plugging her alarm clock.
sooo... PRAISE! APPLAUSE! REVIEWS? PLEASE! It's better than sex! (That's really because I'm not getting any right now, but it's still applicable) Okay. SO Dance is next chapter which you'll all be pretty happy with. There is a poll up on my profile which I would appreciate participation in. Thank you very much. It might be a while before the next chapter is up because I don't really have it fully formed in my head and I have exams coming up so yeah... PLEASE PLEASE PLEAHSE REVIEW! I am literally begging on hands and knees. And thank you to everyone who has reviews or favorited/followed in the past. It means a lot to me. ^_^