Fragment from a letter from Mary to Francis
(One of many he'll never get)
"My soul is blue and my eyes are dry from crying too much. Francis, my dear Francis, since the first time you kissed me I thought I would never feel alone again. I thought I would never fall apart. You were everything I wanted, you were everything I needed. You were mine. And I want you to know I regret nothing, even if I don't ever get the chance to taste your lips again, or feel your heart next to mine. I didn't know it was humanly possible to feel half the things I'm feeling right now, but I know I must be strong. I'm trying to, I swear, but it's harder than I thought. I wish you were here to share this moment with me.
I would give anything to see through the honesty of your eyes once again; to feel your hands holding mine; to be safe in your arms. I would kill to see you cry happy tears when I tell you I'm pregnant with your child; you would hold me in your arms and tell me "I love you", and we would live happily ever after.
My heart is shaking and my faith is fading. I miss you. I miss your white smile, you laugh, and the way you looked at me. I miss the way you used to talk like you knew what you were saying, even when you were clueless. I miss your determination, miss your strength, miss your weaknesses, and miss your courage. I just miss you and will never stop missing you. But this is the only way I can protect you. I would have done anything to save you, and I didn't have another option than letting you go. Now is time to move on for both of us. I wished I could tell you how sorry I am…
You won't ever read this letter and I'm sorry for not telling you the truth. It kills me to hide this from you, and I know it will haunt me forever; but I have no choice. I am sure we would have been a beautiful family, and it is sad to know it will never happen. But Bash is going to be an excellent father, I have no doubts. And I believe we are going to get through all storms, and finally be happy together. There are no words that can describe what he has done for me lately. He has given me everything, I couldn't be more grateful. I have opened my heart.
I'm looking at the stars hoping you are doing the same.
Do you think the moon knows she shines for us?
Something tells me that she does…"