Lyrics: Skillet, It's Not Me, It's You

You know what, Lavi? All the time since you and Jiji entered the Black Order to observe the war as exorcists in order to be able to survive longer and gain more information for our history records – all the time I knew it was wrong for you to take over. I could've done it. I wouldn't have become vulnerable, I wouldn't have become a problem, unlike you.
At first you didn't seem that much different, just a little more easy-going around others, funnier, even a little friendlier so that the other humans involved in this war would trust you. But with the time you spent close to them, longer than with anyone I'd had to associate with before, you grew dangerously attached. And thus began ravaging your own mind.

Let's get the story straight
You were a poison
You flooded through my veins
You left me broken

Whenever you got into situations that forced you to act as Lavi in order to keep your cover, although that stood in contrast to our teachings, even opposed our rules, our dogma, I tried to remind you of exactly those. Tried to remind you of your, of my, of our mission and help you prioritise, just like I'd always done all the years, no matter how the circumstances, no matter which war, which carnage, which people were involved. And you – you just started to argue, to talk me down and forced chains of silence onto me whenever I spoke up, only to make me shut up. Only to prevent me from reminding you of the truth. How often did you try to shatter me already? Shattering a part of yourself.

You tried to make me think
That the blame was all on me
With the pain you put me through
And now I know that

It's not me, it's you, it's not me, it's you
Always has been you
All the lies and stupid things
You say and do, it's you

I hurt. It hurt so bad to see you lose sanity, and there was nothing I could do, although I tried. Lavi, you, just didn't want to listen to my reasoning, didn't want to see the truth I showed you, but lashed onto me, blamed me for your strange, twisted morality and troubled conscience that were obviously grewing somewhere near the surface. That made you trying to convince you, me of things so obviously wrong that you couldn't even stop lying to yourself. Denying me.
Why are you stupid, Lavi? Your actions don't correspond at all with Jiji's teachings, with how you were brought up, with what you witnessed since you can remember. And that rips you apart, makes the differences between you and me even more clear and sharp-edged.
And all the while I was trying to help you. At times, through dreams in which I remembered the blood, the ugly gashes, the wide, reeking fields of bodies after a fight, after uncountable fights. The laughter of the murderers, their grinning, smug, distorted faces. Dreams in which I remembered the hollow stares of children who unfortunately had survived the carnage. Not that I especially wanted them dead, but I – and the other personalities before me – knew what dark and cold future awaited those children left behind to fight on their own. Most of them, if not all, would be broken by the adults still left to rampage the world even further. I remembered the hateful stares of those who thought Jiji and I to be enemies, aggressive soldiers or mercenaries. Or they hated for the sake of it. I couldn't have cared less by the time my name was Deak. But therefore it weren't nice dreams, but such devoid of hope or light, devoid of any positive emotions which wouldn't have been able to touch neither Jiji nor me, anyway, of that much I was sure. And yet, although I didn't really want to remember, although I didn't need to, I did – I remembered for you. But in your mind, Lavi, the objective, distant experiences, the memories, became haunting nightmares.
You should be able to imagine how much it hurt to have to listen to your desperate hopes, desperate denials, desperate lies. Not understanding the sometimes dangerously sudden flare of feelings. Scared of losing sight of your, our goal, scared of losing see you break down. I was the only one who could see that.

It's not me, it's you
All the lies and pain you put me through
I know that it's not me, it's you, you, you
It's not me, it's you, you

So here we go again
The same fight we're always in
I don't care so why pretend?
Wake me when your lecture ends

And again you argue with me although you know better. Deep within, you know that it's yourself uttering the doubts, the questions; it's you who's being sceptical and you cannot longer see how important a thing that is. How it helped me survive until now and how it's one of the few traits carved into our personality so deep that it's been a part of it for so long, we cannot give up on it anymore.
I say, Be sceptical! You say, I am but sometimes I have to trust them!
I try to warn you, You can't! No-one can ever be trusted, be it the Earl, the Noah or humans, mere humans and Exorcists alike.
You shake your head, clinging to the nice, comforting memories you've made so far with them. Clinging to lies.
I'm tired of watching you like this and tell you. You're a liar. They wouldn't be this way if they knew your true colours, if they knew how you've never cared about humans, let alone wether they live or die. They'd hate you for your inhumanity which is the one essential thing they miss and can't understand and which seems cold and cruel to others but really is the only option left for those who fathomed out this world and its inhuman laws.
My my, your thoughts are circling around the same problems all along, your points, your arguments, I know them all and sometimes I ask myself, what do I care? I'm but a former personality, a former fake cover that became part of this fake person with so many different names and yet so little self. Or are there just too many fake minds?
And again, you don't want to listen, you resist my logic with every fibre and instead of trying to come to terms with me, instead of understanding and realising your illogical, even threatening tightrope walk among these people, you only see the painful stress my memory-dreams cause you. And you fight me, start to hate me, unthink me at times, banish me into the dephts of our conscience whenever you feel threatened by me. And vanishing into these depths is frightful, as frightful as you could never imagine, Lavi. Not yet.

You tried to make me small
Make me fall and it's all your fault
With the pain you put me through
And now I know that

It's not me, it's you, it's not me, it's you
Always has been you
All the lies and stupid things
You say and do, it's you

I hate you, Lavi. I hate your guts. Thanks to you I'm slowly but steadily getting insane, too. Just like you. Instead of listening to me who's trying to save you, us, you scream at me and – even worse – you ask questions. Questions I don't understand, questions I've never asked before, questions whose answers lead into ominous directions that I've never had to face. So neither have you. You know none of us can know the answers, why are you even trying to blame me for my nescience which consequently is yours, as well? And I hate you for it. Your questions, your growing depth and range of emotions unsettles me, scares me to the core I thought unalterable. I don't have any answers to the questions you pose. But why did you suddenly start posing questions at all? Why, Lavi?

Let's get the story straight
You were a poison flooding through my veins
You're driving me insane

Meeting and fighting Rhode, that petite and unpredictable Noah with the looks of a scrawny girl and the lunatic dreams of centuries of Noahs, was like a revelation. Finally, finally thanks to her psychological mind attacks and mischievous destruction of your inner barriers, I was able to take over. Knowing that Jiji once had sided with the Noah, I wasn't worried at all about her attacking me. I knew she wouldn't, because I, the older me of you, the one who united all the perfect ones before Lavi, couldn't care less whose side it was that destroyed the world, the humans's or the Noahs's. And hence I was neither a threat to her nor an enemy. By infiltrating your mind and finally breaking it, she must have seen me, locked away in the dark corners of your consciousness. So the moment you lost it and were torn apart, I was free. And Rhode must have been able to feel the one desire that drove my actions, if you could call it desire at all since it was so devoid of unnecessary emotions and bonds as it should always be. The desire to finally return to the secure indifference with which I'd faced my counterparts and the rest of the world around me most of my life, lest it could touch and taint and hurt me. Lest it could matter to me. I just aimed to save myself, wanted to pull myself out of this mess Lavi created.
Let me wind down, let me finally ease up in the absence of human contradiction and human emotions. Let me breath again.

And now you're gone away
I'm no longer choking
From the pain you put me through
And now I know that

It's not me, it's you, you, it's not me, it's you
Always has been you
All the lies and stupid things
You say and do, it's you

It's not me, it's you
All the lies and pain you put me through
I know that it's not me, it's you, you, you
It's not me, it's you, you