1x02: Heart of Darkness
"Fine. Then maybe it's because I'm pure evil…and I can't help myself."
"No. It's because you're hurt. Which means that there is a part of you that is human."
Caroline wanted to hide the emotions that ran through her mind, wanted to keep the feelings hidden from her eyes. She knew how the emotionless mind of a vampire worked, and one of a hybrid – part werewolf – had to be just as predatory to weakness. However, when she heard him say the nearly forgotten endearment, she knew – if she were still human – her heart would be fluttering in her chest. She had come all this way, with so much to say to him, but everything she wanted to say died on her lips.
How could this happen? She had spent fifteen years, curious of what she would say, if she ever ended up here. Would she surprise him, would she tell him that he was right? Would she simply come out and tell him that she cared for him, maybe – quite possibly – even loved him? But now she wondered if any of that even mattered now.
He look ragged, like he just finished slaughtering a whole town. Whether he had been in his wolf form or human form when he killed, she had no idea, but blood covered him from head to toe. And it looked as if he had mad not attempts to hide that fact. Despite her speechlessness, Klaus's siblings more than made up for it.
"Niklaus, please, could you attempt for a mere moment, to stay under the radar?" Ellijah spoke, of course, thinking first of their cover.
Klaus gave Ellijah a mocking look, "For what, dear brother? Mikael has been dead for a long while, and I really don't care much about the humans, or their opinions. I'm immortal. What will they do, aside from lay out a meal for me?"
Before Ellijah was able to do more the purse his lips, Rebekah beat him to the punch.
"Well, what the bloody hell are you doing here? You've been avoiding us for months, you bastard, and now you decide to show your face?" Rebekah growled with as much venom as she could muster.
"It seems you two are conspiring against me, once again. It seems only fitting that I see what pathetic plan you've come up with this time."
This time. Caroline did miss the way he said that. In over a decade, she could only imagine how many things that Rebekah and Ellijah had come up with to get their brother back – though Caroline was far too distracted to catch the first part of what he said. Ellijah looked defeated, as if he knew that this was once again a hopeless endeavor, though Rebekah looked as if she was still clinging to hope. Quite honestly, she was surprised there was still a population left in New Orleans.
"…And this is my city, Rebekah, of course I would be concerned with its well-being and all that lay in it. It seems that you two lot have decided to bring me a peace offering. Diego and Thierry were so eager to tell me what you are keeping from me, baby sister."
Klaus's eyes roamed over Caroline, giving her a once over, making it clear that the only thing he thought of her for, wasn't anything that included emotion. Caroline recognized the primitive look, all on her own, without him having said a word.
"I can't say that I'm surprised, though I'm intrigued that you waited so long to bring her."
Caroline narrowed her eyes.
He rolled his eyes as he met her annoyed ones and smirked, "I'm sorry, Caroline, but it appears my siblings have caused you to waste your time to come and save me."
His smile vanished, and in seconds, so did he.
"As you can see, Miss Forbes, your hands are more than full. My sister seems to have hope that you may be our brother's redemption," Ellijah began, "though we've been down this road once before."
Rebekah gave a disgusted look in Ellijah's direction, "Ellijah, if you could mope less, and go make sure to keep an eye on Nik before he disappears again, that would be much more useful."
Ellijah vanished without as much as a word.
"What happened to him?"
"Don't worry about that, dear. That's a longer story for a different day. Besides, it's none of your concern. Let's leave it at what you said when you told me 'fifteen years changes a person.'"
Caroline through Rebekah a withering glance, "Well, what do you expect me to do?"
"Also none of your concern yet, but Ellijah was unsurprisingly right about one thing."
"And what would that be?"
"We do have our hands full."
Rebekah brought Caroline to a large compound – Rebekah had called it the Abattoir – before coming to an abrupt halt on the stairs above her, "Welcome to your new home, Caroline. I hope you like it, because you'll be here for a while."
"And where is my room?" she asked, glancing in every which direction at her new home.
"I've already had your things brought up to your room. Since you claim to have come back to be with my brother, I found it only fitting your room is next to his – well, his room when he uses it, anyway."
"What?" she came to a halt, eyes wide as a deer. At first she believed Rebekah to be crazy, but then she let her mind wander to her own emotionless state so long ago.
Rebekah narrowed her eyes at Caroline, suspiciously looking for any sign of second thoughts on the baby vampire's face, but instead she found a sentimental one.
"Stefan, just because I haven't kicked you from my home, doesn't mean you're welcome to be so close."
"What's the problem? Feeling threatened by me being here? Feeling anything, at all?" he smiled a smile that was trying to goad her. He was trying to trick her into thinking that she felt something. He may be annoying but he was hardly stupid.
"Actually, forget I said anything. There are about a million rooms to choose from, but good luck finding one without a corpse in it. I'm leaving."
Stefan looked around her abode, wondering how she could go anywhere in Europe, and she chose one of the more ostentatious homes in the middle of the city of Rome. Caroline heard Stefan sigh as she walked out the door. If he thought he was going to make her feel something – bring her humanity back – he had another thing coming.
She had no desire to feel anything. She would kill every person in sight before coming back to the weak girl she was. Besides, turning off her emotions freed her from every painful thing that ever happened in her life. She had gone two years away from the people in Mystic Falls who had put her here in the first place. She was free, and she'd be damned if she let Stefan Salvatore put her back in a cage.
"Caroline?" Rebekah brought Caroline out of her thoughts.
"I'm fine," she said, "That's fine. I'll… be in my room."
Rebekah made a point to show her exactly where it was, before stopping, briefly. Caroline gave her a curious glance.
"….If you need something," she lead on. Caroline smiled. Rebekah may not be the greatest person – she damn sure wasn't Caroline's favorite person by any means – but she was trying to not seem like such a bitch. She wasn't doing a great job, but she was trying.
"No, I'm good, you know, considering I'm being held against my will," Caroline gave Rebekah a pointed look.
"I'm still not explaining anything to you, Caroline," she leaned against Caroline's door and crossed her arms, and Caroline sat down on the bed with an exasperated look, "It seems your friends have a tendency to mess things up when they know what's going on."
"I think you underestimate me, Rebekah. When I told you that I had changed in fifteen years, did I forget to mention that your brother isn't the only who toyed with the off-switch?" Caroline reasoned.
"Caroline, all vampires – young, especially – turn it off. My brother is over a thousand years, and has never turned it off. This isn't-"
"Let me guess, the same thing? Well, let me tell you what I know about vampires without their humanity. One, the last person they want to see is the person who makes them feel the most. I'm guessing since you need me, in your brother's case that position would fall on my shoulders, as his daughter and mother of said child is dead."
Before Rebekah could interrupt, she continued, "Two, when someone tries to make them turn it on, they get more violent, more brutal than normal. And three, well, your brother is a hybrid. He's part werewolf. That makes him ten times worse. He's got that aggression thing going for him, a werewolf that is indifferent? I don't know what you expect me to accomplish. It took Stefan almost three years to make me turn it on again, and as you told me, I am a baby vampire – not a hybrid with an already annoying temper and enhanced werewolf capabilities, and apparently never turned off, so he's also living off that I don't care high."
"You think I haven't thought of that? Are you so determined to give up on my brother so soon?"
"I'm not giving up on Klaus, but I know when I'm walking into a losing battle. Living in Mystic Falls taught me a lot about cutting my losses, and though I have nothing but centuries to spend on your brother, I'm telling you that, if you think that my being here is going to change him, I think you're wrong."
"And I think you underestimate just how much my brother cares—"
"Cared, you mean," she interrupted.
"About you, Caroline. Ellijah might be foolish in thinking that his return to New Orleans a long time ago with a positive attitude was a show of his mercy and change, but I knew what it was. It was you. Of course, it was you. He loves you and you have never had an inkling of a clue how much that is."
Caroline looked down at the floor, lips pursed, no longer with the words to argue. She looked up as Rebekah began to speak again.
"I do know, Rebekah. Your brother caring about me is what brought me to him in the first place! If it weren't for his stupid charm and his stupid accent, then I promise I wouldn't have step foot in this town or even be having this conversation. Of course, I know how much your brother means to everyone and how much my presence means to him. But I also know that because I mean so much to Klaus, that he will stop at nothing to keep me from making him feel again. I don't want to watch him push me away, I don't want to watch… someone I love, completely cut completely every tie to his humanity away."
"I didn't realize that you loved him, Caroline," Caroline was only able to manage to get out a, "I guess I didn't –," before Rebekah interjected her again.
"I need you. You're our last hope. Ellijah has given up, but I'm not. You're the only person we have left to go to."
"I guess it's fortunate I decided to show up; what would you have done if I hadn't showed up, Rebekah? Really? Your brother already thinks I'm here because you guys brought me here." Caroline threw her hands up, raising her voice.
"We would have killed him, Caroline," Rebekah said with a tone mixed with regret, bitterness, and another emotion she couldn't quite pick up, "It's gotten that bad, Caroline. If you had shown up even a year late, and there wouldn't even be someone to come back to, someone to proclaim your love for. Keep that in mind while you sit in here second-guessing things. I'll be back later, stay here."
With that, Rebekah closed Caroline's door and left her to her thoughts. She hadn't even been able to say a word, but her face displayed her disbelief and shock plain as the day.
Caroline was throwing her clothes around the room, trying to wipe away tears and sipping down whiskey all at the same time. Rebekah wasn't here, she hadn't heard her in a good minute, and she was livid. She felt the guilt that Rebekah placed on her shoulders. It was on her. If it weren't for Caroline, Klaus's own flesh would trying killing him. And, somehow, Rebekah was trying to say that it was her fault. She threw the glass into the wall, before deciding that she needed air to clear her head.
Without thinking, she grabbed the first thing that she saw in her emergency bag of clothes, leaving the disaster that was her room.
She gave one last glance at the mirror – to make sure her face was clear of any tears – before grabbing her jacket, "If you want to play games, Rebekah, then I can play just as well."
In seconds, she was far from the Abattoir with no real place in mind to go.
She ended up a bar, unsurprisingly, she found herself at those a lot. She smiled a bit, as the bar almost reminded her of home. Almost. The bartender approached her and poured her a shot, before Caroline realized exactly who she was.
"You!" she exclaimed.
The blonde human woman gave Caroline a small smile, "Ah, the crazy Rebekah-vampire look-alike. Long time no see. Name's Camille – Cami preferably."
"No wonder you're still alive in this town. Must not be a lot of sassy humans in a city like New Orleans with the brains to back it up to. Vervain?"
"Actually, a gift from Rebekah's boyfriend," Camille poured Caroline a shot, "Nice guy, bad temper, too many personal issues."
Caroline actually snorted, "If he's with Rebekah, I'm not surprised he has personal issues."
"Not with Marcel, just with Rebekah's brother, or well, brothers. As in Klaus," she murmured with a pointed look at Caroline. She shuffled around the bar, looking busy, with a fleeting eye, before settling on the task of cleaning out beer mugs.
Caroline wished, so desperately in that moment that she could compel the middle-aged human woman in front of her. To hear all that she knew, then make her forget. She didn't want too many people knowing she was actually curious about Klaus, least of all of the two men he referred to, Diego and Thierry – not when they were feeding him information left and right. She debated inwardly for about a second too long, causing the subject of her worries to speak again, but not before Caroline finally decided to speak, interrupting her.
"So –?"
"Camil –,"with a withering looking sent in Caroline's direction, she forced a smile before correcting herself, "Cami. You know Klaus."
"Unfortunately, yes. Have known him longer than I should. By now, you'd think I'd be the one sitting at the bar, with an alcoholic dependency. Instead, I'm still pouring them for every vampire he sends through the bar. I thought you were another one of his crazy ass friends, sorry."
Caroline's smile became sheepish, "Yes and no, but long time? How long?" her smile vanished, and she waited for an answer.
Cami looked around again before settling her glance on Caroline again, "Since he got here, sixteen years ago?"
Caroline's eyes widened.
This woman may know… everything she needed to know. Her aversion to him may be from her connection to him. If Rebekah's not going to fill me in on her crazy plan to save her brother, then I guess I'll have to roll with the punches and come up with my own plan.
"Go on."
Two hours after Rousseau's closed, twelve shots and half a bottle of Bourbon later, Caroline had been completely filled in on all that Camille knew about Klaus, which was surprisingly a lot more than Caroline would have assumed. Camille had been compelled and cornered by Klaus so often before he had turned it off for company, but afterwards, had been a sort of confidante – thought that may have been because Klaus found a sick sort of ironic amusement from the fact that Camille was studying psychology in grad school.
Caroline shook her head, grimacing at the taste of the latest shot she had taken, letting herself process the information she had from two different sources. From Rebekah's end, it seemed that Klaus had simply turned it off as a result of the loss of his child after a murderous rampage, feeling he had nothing left. From Camille's end, though that wasn't entirely a lie, there was so much more. He had grown to… care about Hayley, so much more, even after the child. He had backed off for sake of his brother's feelings, and instead tried to find comfort in Cami – the brave bartender – who at the time was clearly not interested in him, despite her scholarly mind and sarcastic mouth, telling him in not so many words that his attractive face, and charming personality couldn't make up for the fact that he was a psychotic killer with abandonment issues and she had told him before that she couldn't do the bad guy thing anymore. Caroline felt in that brief moment, a sort of connection, to Camille.
Of course, Klaus being Klaus, didn't react well to being rejected, and especially after finding out about his little sister, Caroline grimaced, gripping her chair, trying to kill him.
Cami had told her of the woes of living in the French Quarter, in the middle of a war between witches and vampires, while being pulled between both sides, losing an Uncle and brother in the crossfire, and at the same time still having to go through the normal motions that are being human. Caroline patted Cami on the shoulder, sincerely feeling like this town wasn't completely full of mannerless monsters. The woman cried for a while, and eventually passed out, not being fortunate enough to have a vampire's tolerance.
Caroline looked at her with sympathy and then realized that she had a little problem, "Crap, this is great." Rubbing her forehead in an exasperated motion, she thought for a moment, then had an epiphany.
Digging through Cami's purse, she pulled out a phone, "God, I love technology." She snooped a little until she found the address she needed.
So, Caroline set about her night of carrying her home, all the while thinking of the mess she was in. A month ago, she had been comforting Elena in the woes of her and Damon drama, yet at the same time, feeling excitement for her other best friend, Bonnie, on her engagement. She had left Mystic Falls to come and worry about herself for a change, and once again, she was still in the same place she was before. Worrying about everyone else's well-being.
Caroline sighed, reaching Camille's apartment complex without much difficulty, before sensing another's presence, "What do you want?"
"Good evening, Caroline," an unusually monotone British accent sounded.
"Klaus," Caroline said spinning around in front of Cami's door to see the infamous face that had so many in this city frantic.
"Caroline," he greeted once more, before taking in Camille's drunken stupor.
"Before you try anything," she opened Camille's door and set her against the floor of her living room before facing Klaus again, "she's drunk and passed out and doesn't need to be in the middle of whatever you're about to do."
He smiled, his eyes possibly radiating with something she couldn't recognize, "Ah, contraire, love, I merely was in the neighborhood, thought I'd drop by, say hello," his pitch dropped significantly, "and threaten you to not do anything stupid."
Caroline was rendered speechless, and listened as he continued, "…though, since you're so kind as to incline an invitation, I'm not adverse to a ménage à trois. I've got some spare time, however, maybe we shouldn't," he inclined his gaze, and moved forward to put his hand on her face before giving her a smoldering look, "given that you are still so inexperienced, and possibly not ready for something so… different from what we had."
Caroline was practically red, face aflame, before she pushed him back. She was livid. He was a… a pig. An emotional Klaus, oh she wanted to kill him more so then than anytime she had before. She realized later that she should have held her tongue before she spoke the next few words,
"For your information, that was hardly my first time, and you're not at all amusing. Ha, ha. Secondly, it seems like despite the fact that you're in charge of this town, the least you'd do is make sure your human pets were protected. And thirdly, don't even think about threatening me to leave because your sister isn't the one who brought me here."
Of course, she realized then, what type of vampire Klaus became when he was emotionless. Ironically, without their humanity, vampires still had unique personalities that separated them. For Elena, she was an absolute bitch to those she normally cared for more than anyone; she wanted to hurt the people she loved, and murder those that she felt empathy for. For Damon, he was like an alcoholic who just got out of rehab and had a relapse. For Stefan, well, he tended to rip people's heads off and get a little too high on blood-lust. For her, she had simply become brutal, and brutally honest to the point where she was almost sure she would scare Stefan away. There was absolutely nothing. No amusement, no games, nothing. She was just a lone-wolf who happened to want to kill at will, whenever she felt the need, or desire. She wanted to be left alone. She had surprised Stefan, who hadn't expected her to be the way she was.
With Klaus… he was himself. He was the same, in the respect that with his humanity on, he would hurt those who tried to hurt him. Without it, he would torture and get under the skin of those who wanted to make him feel. In that, she could relate. It's what emotionless vampires did. When they couldn't feel anything, they wanted to torture the ones who made them feel the strongest – friends, family… lovers.
How unfortunate that she happened to be on the list of people that Niklaus Mikaelson cared about.
He gave her a condescending look, "I don't care what brought you to New Orleans, Caroline, and frankly, I don't care what my sister is up to, but mark my words, this is my town. Leave when you want, but stay out of my way." He grabbed her arm and pulled her to him.
"And don't for a moment think I won't kill you without a second thought. Don't think I won't hesitate. You are nothing to me," he emphasized every word.
"Big words. You sound a little paranoid for someone who doesn't care," she said with as much malice as she could.
"Precautious, love. When the world is after you, you learn to think ahead of your enemy. Much easier without any pesky human emotions around," he said, before moving to walk away.
"I get it, you know," she said, motioning her arms out wide. He paused and turned around to look at her. His eyes pierced her own. Hers were full of hope, his were devoid of everything.
"You get what, exactly?" he questioned, in a murderous tone.
"Why you turned it off," she said gallantly, "I did, too. Once. The perfect vampire, everyone expected me to just deal with it," Caroline looked at the ground, crossing her arms and letting her hair cover her face so he couldn't see how much her saying this affected her, "But, there are some losses that even vampires can't handle. Close friends… a mother… or I guess in your case," she tilted her head to look at him again before hesitantly saying the last word that would set him off, "it would be your daughter."
He looked absolutely predatory as he approached her, "What happened then concerns me little, and should concern you even less. I am in no mood to hear sob stories, Caroline. Emotions are for the weak – love, is for the weak. We are vampires as you so astutely pointed out, so let me make it clear to you. We are not weak. We do not feel. We do not care."
"But you did, once. And you will, again. We all do. Rebekah told me you've never turned it off before," she moved close to his face to meet his eyes, "Why? You used to tell me about all the horrible things people did to wrong you. So why not turn it off a long time ago?"
"Caroline, though you are still physically pleasing to me, I will not refrain from ripping your heart from your chest."
She just stared at him, waiting on an answer. Hands on her hips, she asked again, "Well, that's the second time you've threatened me for asking you a few questions. Fifteen years, we can't catch up? Reminisce?"
He out right laughed at her before moving make a shaking gesture with his finger, as he pointed at her, "You are clever, it's no wonder I wanted you. Good form, love, but it doesn't matter why or why I didn't do things. All that's important is that I did, and I'll never have to be burdened by emotional ties again." He gave her a meaningful glance, hoping she would take the hint.
"Or so you think. I'm not leaving, Klaus," she was close enough to him now that she could kiss him if she tilted her head closer, "if you think your threats scare me, you better get a little more imaginative. Remember? We played this game back in my town for over a year. You won't hurt me—"
"I will—"
"And you know why? Because you'll regret it, regret it more than anything else when you do finally turn it back on. I know that, because if it weren't true, I wouldn't still be standing here."
He gave her a look that clearly told her that she caught him off guard, so she continued, "Niklaus Mikaelson doesn't give warnings, or second chances." He still remained silent.
"I will be here every step of the way, a nagging voice in the back of your head, until you turn it on."
His look hardened as he finally found his words again, "And the deaths that rise in the fallout, will be on your shoulders, Caroline."
"No, they won't. It'll be another thing you'll have to feel, to cling on to, when you come back to yourself. Another thing that the infamous Klaus has done to plague humanity. You know, I think you might actually be Samaritan of the year."
Klaus was finally losing patience with Caroline's semantics, and they both knew it. She was stalling him, hoping that she could keep him from running off. Stefan did the same. The longer he pulled her into conversation, the longer he forced her to endure little things from the past, the more it had an effect on her. Not at first, but slowly, until he pushed her over the edge. She would push Klaus until one emotion stuck, his wrath be damned. She came here with nothing left to loose.
Finally, Klaus spoke again, "What are you really doing here, love?"
Caroline didn't want to admit it, but she had to say it. Granted, she would have preferred to have told him under better circumstances, but perhaps, it might be a wake-up call to his slumbering humanity that there was a girl he loved waiting for him on the other side. She couldn't just not say anything. But, looking back, perhaps, she owed it to him to wait telling him anything at all about her own feelings.
"I missed you, Klaus. I came here to see you. I needed to see you to tell you that I—," he refused to let her finish her declaration.
He smirked, giving a look that would give the Devil himself a run for his money. He moved away from her, quickly.
"Unfortunately for you, I no longer care. It appears you wasted your time making this trek. You. Mean. Nothing. To. Me."
Caroline refused to let him push her out, not with that. Klaus was a lot of things – murderer and psychotic lunatic ran across those possibilities – but he had never given up. It was hard for her to see him like this, looking so completely defeated. He had given up, utterly. With his emotions, he never gave up to anything. He persevered and pushed until he got what he wanted; he always got what he wanted, if not always in the way he expected. At one point, he wanted her, had told her he wanted to be the last lover she ever had, and now that he had that presented to him, he no longer had the ability to feel what she would imagine would be, joy.
She knew that this would be hard, but she would get through him, one way or another.
"I don't believe you," his smirk grew, as if a challenge was being issued, and Caroline just had to throw down the gauntlet, "And I have nothing but time."
Before Caroline or Klaus moved, a voice spoke out.
"I wouldn't count on that, if I were you, Caroline," It wasn't Klaus who spoke, but his little sister, Rebekah. She then fixed her glare on her brother, but the man from before – Marcel – was with her.
"No more games, Nik," Rebekah said. The wind picked up a little in speed, leaves around them. Marcel just kept his eyes fixated on Klaus with a hard glare.
Caroline began screaming in pain, her head feeling as if it would explode. She dropped to her knees, blood running from her nose and ears. Her body temperature was sky-rocketing.
A new figure joined the crowd. She looked young, like she might be in her late twenties. Dark long hair hung around her, and her arms were pointed towards Caroline's general direction.
The pain intensified and she felt as if it might kill her.
She looked at Klaus to see that he looked right back at her. If it were anyone else, she would say that he felt nothing, that he was watching her watching him in agony, and not a single emotion crossed his face.
"Help me," she whispered, but to no avail.
"Enough, Davina," Marcel said. Suddenly, she was able to breathe, and she tried to push herself up, with no luck. The girl, Davina suddenly dropped her arms and looked up to Marcel with a look one might give their brother or father, "You're too kind."
He gave her a small smile.
Rebekah, meanwhile, was still staring at Klaus, "Turn it on, brother."
He cocked his head and let out a small chuckle, "Oh, sister, I knew you and Marcel were desperate but this is a new level of pathetic, even for you two."
"Go on, go ahead, kill her, I dare you sister," Klaus warned, calling Rebekah's bluff. If his own father wouldn't fool him, neither would his sister.
She held her glare, feeling no more words could be said.
Meanwhile, in the middle of the chaos, Caroline felt a hand plunged into her chest, and grab hold of her heart. Turning to face her attacker, her eyes widened in surprise.
Author's Note: Okay, so first of all, yes, I'm using titles from actual episodes because I'm A) too lazy to think of my own, and B) they have a meaning in regard to what I'm writing in the chapter. No, I'm not translating what Klaus said in French, though given the context, it should be fairly obvious, and I want to point something out. Without his emotions, it's not that I'm making him overtly sexual, simply that he is trying to get under Caroline's skin. If something's not making sense, I promise it will in the next few chapters. Please review, give me your sincere thoughts on what you like, don't like, loathe, and all that! Next chapter should be out in another few weeks.