Pokemon Quickies Chapter 9: Quickie 9: I'm Game If You Are or Bored Game Night, a pokémon fanfic

Explanation/Disclaimer: I am the lizard king.

Quickie #9: I'm Game If You Are or... Bored Game Night

Announcer: "Looks like our favorite trio is heading back to a very familiar city, Cerulean City. Why? Oh I'm sure there's a good reason...

"ASH!" Misty yelled, "We're DEFINATELY lost now..."

Ash looked at Misty innocently, "Now Misty, we're definitely not lost, we're in Cerulean City! You should know that!"

Misty growled, "Yeah, peachy, except we were TRYING to get to Goldenrod City. You didn't just miss by a town... you missed by a whole damned country!"

Ash looked carefully at the map, then turned it upside-down, then stared at it a bit, "Nope... I still cant make heads or tails of this thing..." Ash crumpled up the map and tossed it away, "Well that tears it, that's the last time I buy a map from an ENRON yard sale... no direction at all..."

"Grrrrrrr..." Misty growled again, "Damnit Ash, first off, we are NEVER letting you lead the group again, and second, lets try not to use such dated jokes..., right Brock?"

But Brock didn't hear a word, he was too busy singing along with his headphones, "Who let the dogs out? Who? Who Who Who Who? Who let the dogs out? Who? Who Who Who?"

Ash stuck out his tongue in disgust, "...and speaking of dated..."

"Actually its not hard to see WHY he's not dated." Misty replied.

"I heard that..." Brock said taking off his headphones, "If you got something to say to me you prissy little bitc..."

Ash quickly stepped in, and interrupted, "Alright guys... We're all a little testy from traveling so long..."

The two nodded and sighed, "Your right, your right." Brock admitted, "I think a good night sleep will do us a load of good."

"Great!" Ash said, "There's a pokemon center just a few blocks from here."

"Did you get that from the map?" Misty asked, "Cause if you did we'll be lucky we don't wind up in New Jersey... And I don't want to go THERE again..."

***SCENE CHANGE TO...

Ash Misty and Brock when they visited New Jersey a few years ago.

The three stand there, sniffing in the air. After a minute Ash asks, "Umm, guys? Do you smell that?"

Brock nods and sniff and says, "What the hell is that?"

***SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY

"Besides," Misty said as she noticed Ash was getting annoyed, "Why would we stay at a pokemon center? I LIVE here, we can just stay at my house!"

"That's a good idea!" Brock said excitedly.

"Yeah," Misty continued, then looked at Brock and said, "ESPECIALLY since my sisters are out of town, so they wont have to deal with YOU ogling them!"

"What?" Brock said, "That's ridiculous!"

"Ridiculous?" Misty scoffed, "Don't you remember the LAST time we stayed at my house?"

***FLASHBACK TO THE LAST TIME THEY STAYED AT MISTY'S HOUSE...

Daisy, (Misty's sister in case you don't remember) is laying on her bed and Brock walks in completely naked and sopping wet. "I was just taking a shower, and I just noticed there's room enough for two in there."

Daisy just stares in shock, opened mouthed.

Brock grins looking at her face and asks, "Is that an offer?"

Daisy shrieks.

***SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY...

"Oh sure," Brock complained, "Single me out... like that hasn't happened to everyone else!"

"Umm guys," Ash said, "Maybe we should get going... I think we'll all feel better once we get to sit and relax for the night..."

"Pika!" Pikachu chimed in.

"See?" Ash said, "Pikachu agrees!"

"Pikachu pika pika chu pikachu pika!" (Translation: No, I just haven't had a line yet in this freaking episode, and had to say something damnit!)

***TWO HOURS LATER...

Spirits are much better among our trio, and they are lounging around just enjoying a bit of R and R. Brock is laying on the couch reading an article, then he calls out to Misty and Ash who are sitting watching TV, "Hey guys, you read this article in pokemon magazine?"

Ash shakes his head, "What's it about?"

"It seems like they discovered that Hannibal Lecter was a huge pokemon lover..."

"Really?" Misty asked, "He doesn't seem the type."

"Yeah... apparently he loves them over rice..."

There's a moment of silence. Then Misty and Ash turned their heads back to the TV.

"Nothing?" Brock asked looking for laughs.

"Nah." Ash and Misty responded.

"Hmmph." Brock said, going back to the magazine, "Everyone's a critic."

About fifteen minutes later Misty spoke up. "This show kinda sucks."

"Yeah," Ash agreed, "There's nothing good on TV anymore..."

There's a painful pause of silence then Ash and turns and looks at the viewers and continues, "Except, of course, Japanese cartoons... they still rock! AND... they don't contain subliminal messages to prepare for the great conquering..."

Brock nudged Ash in the chest, and made a "shhhh" noise with his finger. Ash nodded.

Misty turned off the TV. "Well, since TV sucks..."

"...except, of course, cartoons." Ash added.

"Yes, thank you," Misty finished, "We could always play a boardgame, I have a whole closet full of games."

Misty headed out of the living room and upstairs.

"That could be fun..." Ash commented.

"...or a segway for a string of jokes." Brock replied.

"Either way, its all good." Ash replied.

Misty quickly returned, her arms full of boardgame boxes. "Alright, I didn't know which one we should play, so I just took them all."

"Fair deal," Brock asked, "so which ones do you have?"

"Lets see here..." Misty said going through her pile, "Well, we can play Twister!" Misty then looks over at a smiling Brock and amends what she said, "On second thought... never mind."

Misty rummaged a bit more and picked up a box. "How about we play Monopoly?"

Suddenly the front door bursts open. In walks Bill Gates who walks in, grabs the box away from Misty, and leaves.

There's stunned silence. Ash finally says, "Well... that was unexpected."

Misty goes back to the boxes, "Well, how about Clue?"

Ash takes the box and looks at it and groans, "Oh no... its one of those 'theme' versions."

"Which theme?" Brock asked.

"Clue: 'Who Killed Nicole Simpson?" Ash reads. He then opens the box and asks, "Hey... why is OJ on all these cards?"

"Hm." Misty says, "Must be a misprint."

Brock coughs and says sarcastically, "Yeah... 'misprint'."

ANNOUNCER: "The opinions of this story do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the author and producers.... but come on... if you cant get your opinions from an online spoof of pokemon, where CAN you get your opinions?

Misty picked up another box, "How about Trouble?"

"Its FUN getting into Trouble!" Everyone yelled at once.

"...that was weird..." Brock said, "But its not ALWAYS fun getting into Trouble..."

***SCENE CHANGE TO THE OLD DRAGNET ENDING...

ANNOUNCER: "Pikachu was arrested in Los Angeles, and will be tried by the State of California for the murder of Togepi. Evidence is still being planted... erm... retrieved, by the local law enforcements."

***SCENE CHANGE BACK TO MAIN STORY...

Misty put the box back down, "On second thought, I don't want to play anything with a 'pop-o-matic' bubble. The sexual innuendo practically writes itself..."

Brock and Ash exchanged a glance confused, and then shrugged.

Then a box caught Ash's notice. "Hey! Let's play Operation!"

"Oohhhhhh No." Misty said, "You take that game WAY to seriously! Remember last time?"

***SCENE CHANGE BACK TO THE LAST GAME OF OPERATION...

*BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ...

Misty laughed, "Haha, Ash, you touched the sides!"

"Damnit! He's flat-lining!!" Ash yelled, and started pounding on the game's chest. "Breath damnit! Breath!" Ash said nearly frantic, "I've never lost a patient yet! Don't you give up on me!"

Misty and Brock just stared opened mouthed. "Ummm... Ash?" Brock said, "Its just a game..."

"How CALLIOUS can you be???" Ash spit out, "How can you think of saving lives as a GAME? You are not GOD my friend!"

Then Ash started to do mouth to mouth to the boardgame...

*BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

Ash is sent backwards out cold by the electric shock of the game.

Brock shook his head, "He takes this too literally..."

Misty sighed and started packing up the game, "And you wonder why we don't play 'Ants in the Pants'"

***SCENE CHANGE BACK TO THE MAIN STORY...

"Hmmm" Ash says thinking hard, "I don't remember any of that..."

"We could play Blind Date," Misty says opening a box, "Here's the sunglasses, and here's the canes... oh shoot... the seeing eye dogs aren't in the box!"

"Oh that's OK Misty," Ash replied, "I don't think we could afford any more problems with the censors."

Misty ignored Ash and opened another box, "What about, 'Don't Wake Daddy'?"

But as Misty opened the box, the little daddy figure opened its eyes and yelled at her, "What the hell you think your doing you little bitch? I gotta get up early tomorrow morning!"

Then the figure leaps out of the box and lands on Misty's face and starts raining down blows. After much screaming, squealing and cursing, Brock and Ash managed to yank the toy figure off Misty and toss it back into the box.

"Fu-BLEEP-ing toys." Misty cursed rubbing her forehead, "Its only like that when it's out all night drinking at 'Tapper'."

"How about we just play Scrabble?" Brock asks, holding up it's box.

"Yeah... that seems safe enough,", Misty agrees.

After getting set up Ash saw a perfect word to play. "Here we go, K W Y G I B O, that's all 7 letters, for 50 points, plus on a triple word score. That's over 150 points! Beat that!"

Brock raised his eyebrow, "Kwygibo?"

"Yes, its a big dumb balding North American Ape." Ash explained.

"Why you little!!!" Brock yelled out.

"Aye Caramba!" Ash gasped.

Misty just made a "Mmmmmh" noise.

Togepi made a "Suck - Suck" noise with its pacifier.

Pikachu lets out a loud "BurrrrrRRRRrrrrrpppppPPppp."

Gary appears at the window, points in and says "Haw haw!"

Suddenly Professor Oak appears at the door, arches his fingers and says, "Exxxclent"

There's a pause after all this. Finally Misty speaks up and says, "Can we end this now?"

Ash nods and says, "Okiely Dokely!"

"D'oh!" Brock barked out.

***THE END***

"Good one guys!" Ash says.

"Yeah, easy for you to say, " Gary says walking off, "I get two words in this whole episode, and THEY were stolen from another show!"

Professor Oak corrected, "Now now, they're "borrowed"... stealing is such an ugly word!"

"Besides..." Ash said, "Your lucky! You weren't even suppose to do that line, that was suppose to be Meowth's... but for some reason they never showed up!"

Brock and Misty exchanged a glance and Brock said, "I wonder where they are?"

***SCENE CHANGE TO NEW JERSEY...

Jessie looks quite aggravated, "James! You dummy! How could you get us so lost?"

James shrugged, "I guess it was easy! We'll just ask for directions, and we'll be back by the next episode!

Jessie lets out a deep sigh, "Fine, alright, as long as we're here, who wants to hit Atlantic City and do some gambling?"

"Sounds good!" James agree, "Coming Meowth?"

*sniff sniff* "Hey guys... do any of youse smell dat?" Meowth asks.

*sniff sniff* Jessie and James, "Hmmm...."

...

***THE REAL END***

THIS STORY IS DEDICATED TO MY HOME STATE OF NEW JERSEY. A WONDERFUL PLACE TO LIVE, AND HOME TO THE WONDERFUL LOCAL GAME... "WHATS THAT SMELL?"

Alright, my ninth quickie is in the bag! Go me, Go me... It would have bee up sooner, but due to personal reasons, I really wasn't in much of a jovial mood, but that, for the most part, past. Thank you for reading my story, and a VERY special thanks to all of you that have reviewed these quickies. If YOU would like a very special thanks too, you should post a review right away! And if you've already reviewed, but liked the feeling of getting a very special thanks, then feel free to review again. OK, that's it, I'm done... I hope you enjoyed! Thanks again for reading!