This a collection of drabbles surrounding various prompts from The Heart of Camelot. (Merlin fans, I'd advise you to check that site out. It's amazing.)
The Challenge: Write 100-300 words as a response to this prompt, making sure you don't go above 400 at the absolute maximum.
You may use whatever genre, characters, pairings, ratings you like, but you MUST include the word below in your drabble.
Word: Forlorn
Category: Gen (Canon)
Characters/Pairings: Arthur, Merlin
Rating/Warnings: K+
Notes: Arthur's thoughts in 400 words of what happened at 5x13
Forlorn
Merlin didn't look sad. That forlorn, empty look in his cobalt eyes weren't meant to be there.
Arthur didn't understand. He couldn't. In the past ten years he had known the man, he had watched his friend grow from the naïve farm boy into a strong advisor. Merlin had been a constant in his ever-changing life, the rock he clung to when the white-water rapids became too hard to swim against.
He never wanted Merlin to change. Even though he was dying, even though he could feel his strength leaving him with each step they traveled, he just wanted Merlin to stay the same.
"I don't want you to change. I want you to always be you."
He meant those words. He couldn't bear it if Merlin changed because of his death. He knew it would be an impossible task for his friend to accomplish; their bond was stronger than anything Arthur had ever felt, in a strong race against the love he held for Guinevere. When Arthur died, he knew, for Merlin, it would feel like half of himself was gone as well.
Arthur knew he was dying. He had accepted it the moment he couldn't raise his head, the horse's trot sending his throbbing heart into his throat. He knew he wouldn't make it, but it didn't mean he wouldn't try to fight it. He had to hold on. He had to let Merlin know.
He had to let Merlin know just how much he meant to him.
At least it was him going, Arthur realized, and he wouldn't have to stay behind and mourn the loss of his other half. It was a selfish thought, but it was one he embraced. He wasn't as strong as Merlin. Merlin was everything Arthur aspired to be, and he wished that had more time to tell him that. Arthur kept fighting. He kept pushing. He could feel Death breathing down his neck, and though it would test Merlin – tear him apart – he accepted the inevitable.
But he was oh so scared. He didn't want to die. He didn't want to be alone. He was scared of what would happen next. Arthur was scared to die.
Soon, it was right there. There was so much he wanted to say. Death was here. He was leaving; there was no way to change it. There was one last thing, though. With his last breath, he hoped Merlin would understand.
"Thank you."