Explanation/DisclaimerIt's… ALIVEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Quickie #38: Halloween Special: Tricks or Treats?
Announcer: "You didn't really think we'd go a Halloween without doing a special, did you? What do our heroes have planned for this unholiest of nights?"
"TEEN TITANS… GO!!!" A voice calls out.
Ash leaps into view wearing a red outfit with black and yellow cape and black mask, he twirls around a bo staff and declares, "Robin!"
Misty hops in dressed in a purple short skirt and purple top, her hair down, and she holds up two bright green glow sticks and declares, "Starfire!"
Brock jumps into view dressed out in tech, half his face hidden behind a metal mask, he holds up his arm which turns into a cannon like weapon and says, "Cyborg!"
Max scuffles into view painted green wearing a purple jumpsuit, he growls, "Beastboy!"
May stalks in wearing a black t shirt, ratty ripped jeans shorts with a flannel shirt tied around her waist and holds her arms straight out from her sides making a T.
Ash, Brock, Misty and Max all gape at her. Misty puts her hand to her head and sighs, "May… I thought we were going as a theme costume."
May looks at them in disbelief, "I know! You told me to be Raven! What the hell are you wearing? I thought you guys were going to be my flock!"
Everyone groaned. Ash huffed and said, "Well, its too late to worry about this now… jeez May, I thought by telling you what to dress as we'd not repeat the same obscure costumes like last year."
"Well," Brock said, "In fairness, it's not the same obscure costume as last year, it's a whole new obscure costume."
"So," Max said holding up a pumpkin pail, "Are we ready to do some trick or treating?"
"You bet, 'BB'," Ash said grinning, "We're trick or treating come hell or high water this year! Last year we had that whole mishap with those monsters, and the year before that we had those pumpkin people fiasco."
Misty scoffed, "Yea… 'fiasco', that's what I'd call that episode."
"Look…" Ash defended, "the author has already explained that there were extenuating circumstances going on that year."
"Yeah, but I really don't think O.D.'ing on snicker bars counts as extenuating circumstances." Misty retorted.
"Yeah, like you've never eaten an entire bag of snickers minis and raced through the town naked covered in blueberry jam screaming, "The blue man group is coming, the blue man group is coming! These things happen."
"Suck-up." Misty said sticking out her tongue.
"Yep," Ash said, "And you notice who's still the star? So that ruined those two years… and how about the year before that? We spent the entire night waiting in that corn field on the Great Pumpkin just so Tracey could get some sketches of it."
"Did he come?" May asked curiously.
"No idea, we were attacked by a group of kids with these strange glowy eyes." Ash explained, "Heh heh, they torn Tracey a new one… I never knew you could do that with a pitchfork."
"Come on guys!" Max said tugging on Ash's arm, "Let's get started!"
"Do you really think its ok to go out with May dressed like that? It kind of ruins the whole theme." Misty asked.
"Well… two things." Ash said, "One… we're burning valuable and precious time that could be spent begging for candy and waiting for May to change will only burn more. And two, its not like May's the only one who's breaking the theme… look at Pikachu over there."
Ash points over to Pikachu, who's dressed as a squirrel. Pikachu raises both arms and screams, "Pika Pikachu!" ("Squirrelly Wrath!")
"Obscure costume #2," Brock commented, "Alright, come on, let's go! This is the year we get to go trick or treating!"
"Alright Titans… GO!!!" Ash said pointing at the door. Everyone but May left. May stood there for a second then walked over to the CD player, pressed play, "Come Out to Play" started to blast out, May put her arms straight out again and then headed out through the door.
…but as soon as they got out the door, they were stopped by Tracey, wearing a skull mask. "Hey guys, where are you going?"
"Trick or Treating of course," Ash answered, then asked, "What the hell are you wearing?"
"Oh it's a Silver Shamrock Skeleton mask… you're suppose to wear it while you watch the big TV give away tonight, it's on shortly… aren't you going to watch?"
Ash and Brock exchanged a meaningful glance. "Um… no, you go on ahead… good luck with that." Brock says sarcastically.
"Aw…" Tracey said, as he started towards Oak's lab, "Guess I'll go on ahead and wait for you guys."
"Have fun!" Ash waved, then muttered, "Don't go and lose your head or anything." to which Brock and Ash giggled nastily about.
Brock added, "You know, those TV shows… turn you're brain right to mush." and the two started giggling nastily again.
"You gonna let us in on the joke?" Misty asked raising an eyebrow.
"Nah," Ash said, "Where's the fun in that? You'll find out when you check in on Tracey later… heh, make sure you bring a mop." And the two boys started laughing again.
"Alright alright," Ash said catching his breath and wiping away a tear, "We're burning moonlight here, let's move out!"
…but… before they could get out of Ash's driveway, he heard his mom call out to him. "Hunny, before you go, could you help me out here with Mr. Mime?"
"No Problem Mrs. Ketchum!" Brock immediately rang out and sprinted back towards the house.
Ash growled annoyed.
But when they got inside, "HOLY CRAP!" Ash, Misty, Max and May all yelled. In the middle of the room was Mr. Mime, bound by his legs to a chair, a large metal contraption with spikes twisted around his head. A timer was ticking away.
"I just came back from the store and found him like this," Mrs. Ketchum said, "This is the last time I let that nice Mr. Jigsaw keep an eye on Mr. Mime while I go to the store. If he had kept a better eye on him I'm sure that Mr. Mime wouldn't have gotten himself into a mess like this."
Max looked at the contraption from all angle. "Hmm… looks like this thing will split Mr. Mime open like an egg in an egg slicer. And it's probably heavily booby trapped!"
"So what do we do?" May asked worried.
"Jeez," Ash said, "Stand back."
Ash pushed Max slightly out of the way and quickly yanked on one metal spike, twisted two knobs and then squeezed a lever. And with a loud clank the entire contraption just fell off Mr. Mime, who danced gleefully.
"Wow." Misty said quietly, "That… that was amazing Ash."
Ash scratched the back of his head guiltily, "Not… really," he confessed, "I was actually trying to set the device off, that whole egg slicer thing sounded cool!"
Everyone sweatdropped.
"Well," Max said, "Anyway, I think you've learned a valuable lesson about letting anyone with the name 'Jigsaw' keep an eye on loved ones."
"You're certainly right!" Mrs. Ketchum agreed, "Next time I'm just going to ask that nice Mrs. Voorhees up the block."
The five youngsters glanced nervously at each other.
"No costume Mrs. Ketchum" Brock asked, stars in his eyes.
"Oh, I just haven't changed yet. I got a really nice Wonder Woman costume… but you know it was awfully hard trying to find a top that fit my bust size. But not to worry, I found one!"
"Ohhhhhhh!" Brock swooned, "I think we can hold off our trick or treating until you change, that way if you need a hand getting into costume I could always lend a…"
A birdarang smacked off the back of the head knocking Brock out.
"Nice shot" Misty whispered to Ash.
"Thanks." Ash said dragging Brock out of the room, "Alright mom, we're off, catch you later!"
"Do you think we can finally start trick or treating yet?" Max groaned.
"Yeah," Ash said, waving his cape into a groggy Brock's face trying to revive him faster, "It really does seem to be one thing after another, doesn't it?"
"Let's just get going before anything else happens!" May said.
"PREPARE FOR TROUBLE WE'RE OUT OF SIGHT!"
"Yes, and make it double because its Halloween Night!" James said still not seen.
Everyone groaned, "Right on cue." May sighed.
Jessie, dressed in a skin tight purple outfit with a 'J' on it appeared, followed by James in an identical costume, but a Z on his, followed quickly by Meowth dressed like a blue Monkey.
"Give us Pikachu, or we'll break up your group of super friends!" Jessie threatened.
Ash pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Listen guys, I have to give you points for your Zan and Jayna costumes…"
"…hey, what about my costume?" Meowth complained, "Don't I get no credit?"
"Not really, its not very good… you just painted yourself blue." Ash said, "Where's the quality in that?"
Meowth sighed, "I spent all my money on Snicker minis…"
"That explains it," May pointed out, wiping a streak of blue off Meowth revealing that it wasn't paint but jam.
"Irregardless," Ash said holding up his hands, "But you see, we're really struggling trying to go trick or treating here… so can we just put this off another night?"
The evil trio let out a nasty laugh, "You wish twerp, you want to go trick or treating then you better just give us your Pikachu, or you might lose more then just a night of trick or treating!" James threatened.
Pikachu growled and flipped Team Rocket off.
"Wow," Misty commented, "He really DOES have squirrelly wrath."
"Alright, enough of this." May yelled, "We don't have time for this, I'm not missing out on chocolate this year!"
May grabbed a chair that was folded up and leaning against Ash's garage and cracked James in the head with it. Then turned and threw it at Meowth, knocking the talking cat over. May then kicked over a nearby metal garbage can, kicked Jessie in the gut, spread her arms out again, and then DDT'ed the villain into the garbage can.
Brock and Ash started chanting, "ECW! ECW! ECW! ECW!!!"
May brushed the dust off her hands looking proud, "See.. You never want to mess with a girl and her candy because…" May then trailed off and let out a loud shriek.
"What's the matter?" Misty asked panicked.
"Damnit!" May cursed holding out her shirt looking at it, "That even flow DDT into the garbage can just tore the hell out my shirt! I cant go out like this!"
Ash groaned, "Come on May… it's not that big a rip…"
"But… what if it continues the rip and it pulls my entire top off?" May asked worriedly.
"Then fan boys world wide will have sticky keyboards." Ash said shrugging.
May picked the steel chair back up.
Ash backed off and quickly said, "Ok ok, point made… go change… but please, HURRY!"
15 minute later
Brock was deep in the telling of a story, "And the man pulled off the road… but he then realized that the guy in the other car wasn't trying to scare him… …he was trying to warn him… for he saw that… HAMTARO WAS IN THE BACKSEAT!!!"
Ash, Misty and Max all shrieked in terror. After a minute, Misty had a hand to her cheat breathing hard, "Damn… no one tells a scary story like you."
"Alright guys, I'm ready!" May said coming out the door, "I had to throw something together, I hope its ok!"
May came out wearing a short blue skirt, with a matching long sleeve blue top, with bubblegum pink hair parted into two large ponytails. Oh her shirt was a crest over a breast with a Q on it.
Everyone looked at her for a second, then Ash snapped his fingers, "Oh, I got it, you're Megumi from Detective Academy Q, aren't you?"
"Wow, that makes obscure costume #… what now?" Misty asked
"I think we're up to 5 if you count the wonder twins as separate costumes."
"6 if you count Gleek." Max corrected.
"Can we pleaseeeeeeeeeeee start trick or treating?" Ash pleaded.
"Yes, lets!" May insisted.
And the quintet hurried off of Ash's property and into town.
A FEW HOURS LATER
"Man, what a haul!" May said gleefully.
"This was the best Halloween ever!" Max rang out.
"I cant believe we actually got to go trick or treating!" Ash explained, "I thought we were going to get to town and found it overrun with zombies."
"…or pumpkin creatures." Misty coughed.
"Would you just let it go?" Ash asked, "You keep needling him and he'll just start making "Danny Phantom Quickies, and we'll be stuck in Cartoon Network Limbo!"
"What is with these tiny boxes of candy with imprints of monsters on little sugar tabs?" Brock asked, "You always get houses that give them out, but I never see them in any store."
"I'm more curious about how Candy Corn got its name… it doesn't look like corn… its not shaped like corn… it doesn't taste like corn… so what the hell?" Misty asked.
"I just want to solve the eternal mystery of what the hell are Necco Wafers are made out of, and how on earth does the company that makes this edible chalk stay in business?" Ash asked scratching his head.
SCENE CHANGE TO A DARK BASEMENT
Jigsaw laughs as he turns on the equipment, and Geodudes are dropped one by one into rotating blades turning the screaming pokemon into powder. After slipping through a few different tubes, wrapped packets of Necco wafers roll out on a conveyor belt.
BACK TO MAIN STORY
"I guess its one of those things that its better not to know," Misty said shrugging.
"Well," Ash said, "I'm bushed, I'm going to get going to bed."
Everyone looked at Ash in surprise.
"Alright, I'm lying, I'm going to gorge myself on candy and spend all night watching all 37 Friday the 13th movies, including the long forgot about, "Friday the 13th part 25: Jason goes to E3".
"Oh I remember that one!" Brock said, "That one has the tag line, "You cannot kill what doesn't have a life."
"Was that in reference to Jason or the people at E3?" Misty asked.
Off in the distance on can almost swear that they could hear a rim shot.
"Well, I don't know about any of you," May said taking her hair out of the ponytails, "But I think candy and bad horror movies sound like a perfect way to end Halloween!"
Everyone agreed and headed inside, "Wow," Misty said, "I cant believe that we're ending this on such a positive note!"
SCENE CHANGE TO OAK'S LAB…
Professor Oak, who's costume consists of Groucho Marx glasses and a T-shirt that reads, "Screw you WB!", walks into his TV room holding a bowl of popcorn saying, "Hey Tracey, there's an interesting documentary on Pokemon Witch hunts on Discovery, would you mind terribly if I…"
Oak stops midsentence as he enters the TV room, seeing what's left of Tracy lying on the floor, while the TV blares, "happy happy Halloween, Halloween Halloween, happy happy Halloween… silver shamrock!"
Oak sighed and says, "I'll get the mop…"
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!
THE END
"Well, that was a good one!" Ash said.
"Yep, nice to see we haven't missed a step!" Misty replied.
"I'm just disappointed that I don't think we made any puns at all." Brock said pouting.
"Yea, and that's like the perfect number." Misty retorted.
"Hey, guys," Max said, "Did we really kill Tracey off?"
Ash laughed, "Oh no, Max. Tracey will be back right as rain next time we need him. You cant just kill Tracey off like that!"
"Oh, because besides all the crap we give him, he's really a valued friend and valuable member of our team?" May asked.
"No…" Ash said waving his hand, "Because what fun would it be if you could only kill Tracey off once?"
Max, Misty and May shot Ash a look, but Brock nodded silently in agreement.
The REAL End
Thanks for reading my Halloween quickie, I hope all of you enjoyed, and I hope you all have a very happy Halloween. I want to thank everyone who sent me messages asking if I was ok, because it had been so long since my last quickie. I really do appreciate it. I am still doing well, knock on wood. But I also started a new job, and getting back into a routine took some getting used to. I will try to get more then one a year wink. Thank you again for everyone who asked, it was very appreciated. Happy Halloween! (Oh… and don't forget to review!)