Chapter 10.
"Well, there's going to be three big bads we really need to plan for. Four, once Willow finds out that we're dating." Faith said.
"Hey! You'd better not be talking about Willow as a big bad."
"Sorry, but Willow's a bitch and a huge hypocrite when it comes to you and her. At least right now. She'll admit it eventually, but not until after turning lesbo and years of counseling. For now, even though she's not dating you and actively trying to hook up with Wolfboy, she's still going to do everything in her power to break us up." Faith calmly explained. "So, be ready for that. The other three opponents are the Sisterhood of Jhe, the watchers' council, and the Mayor."
"Wait! Willow's gay?" Xander asked.
Faith just smiled at her man's priorities. "She always said she was 'kinda-gay'. I always said that was just a funky way of saying 'bisexual'. But I ain't gonna judge. And Willow's sexual history isn't what I want to talk about right now. Unless you really want to, that is." she waggled her eyebrows suggestively.
DD just shook her head at the antics. "Perhaps if we could refocus on the matter at hand?"
"Right." Xander shook himself. "Did you say the watchers' council is one of the enemies we have to face?" Xander looked at the watcher in the room.
Diana nodded. "There's a test that the council gives every Slayer when they turn 18. Depending on who you talk to, it's either a horrible betrayal of trust or an important tradition. I'm slowly making a list of those who feel either way."
"Because there are a lot more reforms that we need to make before... well, let's just say that we need some watchers on the side of the Slayers before the First Evil decides to kill them all." Faith picked up the thread.
"And Buffy's 18th birthday is in a month." DD finished.
Xander was silent for a moment. "So you know everything that's going to happen." he realized.
"No." Faith said quickly. "I know a lot about what did happen. But I've already made changes. Buffy and Scott are still together and happy. You dusted Spike. Plus my memory isn't perfect and I wasn't around for everything."
"Swiss Cheese brain?" Xander asked.
"Sorry, Al. No dice. I'm pretty sure I remember everything I remembered before I 'leapt'. There are just gaps because I was never fully part of the Scooby Gang and split to do my own thing for a long time. You're lucky I know anything at all about the upcoming bosses."
"Bosses?"
Faith smiled. "Yeah. Bosses. Just like your computer games." she paused. "Actually, you probably don't play many computer games yet do you?" After he shook his head she continued. "Don't worry about it. I got a PlayStation and Final Fantasy upstairs. 'Seven' for you. 'Tactics' for me."
"You got me Final Fantasy 7?" Xander gushed.
"I've never seen you play video games." Diana observed.
Faith pointed to Xander first then her watcher. "Yes. And I'm too busy right now to play. Once we deal with the Mayor and get Xander trained, then we'll have some down time. Summers are always kinda slow." she said, fully aware of the double meaning.
"So." Xander said awkwardly as they stood in front of his house. "Do you want to come up and meet the family?" he joked.
"Do you want them alive?" Faith scowled.
"Um, yes please?" Xander said.
"Then, no. Get your shit and get out."
Xander scrambled to do as he was bid, wondering if she was joking about killing his parents or not. It was just... she hadn't seemed like she was joking.
The excitement and rush of the past 24 hours had finally worn off and Xander Harris was lying in bed, next to a beautiful woman, staring up at the ceiling, and wondering just what had happened to him. A little over 48 hours ago, he had been dating Cordelia Chase. There had been a lot of kissing but nothing beyond some heavy petting. And he'd found himself attracted to Willow for no reason he could yet comprehend. Then Willow had tried her de-lusting spell and everything had gone to hell. Cordy had broke up with him. Willow had gone chasing after Oz. And just when it seemed like he'd be alone forever, Faith had swooped in and- and...
Fucked him silly. There was no other way to say it.
Then, before he could recover his senses or find his sense of shame, she'd dropped the real bomb on him. She was his wife in the future. He rubbed a circle on her naked back with his thumb, singularly amazed that there was a naked (possibly crazy) woman sleeping on top of him. They hadn't had any sex tonight, for which he was actually grateful. He wasn't sure if she wasn't trying to kill him through copulation. He disengaged himself from her and snuck quietly downstairs.
"Well, at least you had the decency to put on some underwear, unlike some people I know."
Xander froze. Double D- No. What was her real name? Diana. Had caught him sneaking downstairs. She was sitting at the kitchen table in a robe. And without support, it was far too obvious why Faith called her watcher Double D. He focused on looking her in the eyes.
"I had a feeling you might have... questions. Sit. I'll make you some hot cocoa." she got up and poured steaming water from an already hot kettle into a mug. She set the mug in front of him. "I'm going to go ahead and assume that you're having trouble coming to grips with what Faith told you."
Xander took a sip of the too hot cocoa and set it down. "Yeah." he looked up at Faith's room. "I mean it seems like a plot out of a movie or a TV show."
"I had a similar reaction. Do you want to know what she told me? She said 'says the woman who trains Vampire Slayers for a living'." DD imitated Faith's tone and accent fairly well.
Xander smiled and took another sip. "But I'm neither a woman nor a trainer of Slayers." he quipped.
"She hasn't been able to tell me much about my own past or future, but I believe her anyway." Diana said.
"Why hasn't she?" he asked.
"Apparently, I died. Quite soon after we first met. Too bad, I suppose. She hasn't said much, but I fear that was just the start of a long slide for her. The fact that she knows only the highlights of the next 4 years or so tells me that it took her a long time to join your group." DD said.
"No way. She's totally part of the team." Xander protested.
Diana just gave him a long suffering smile. "This time." She cleared her throat. "I have to say, I was as surprised as you to find out you were her husband. It was a pleasant surprise."
"You didn't know?"
DD shook her head. "I'm afraid that dying early didn't allow a bond of trust to develop between myself and my Slayer. And she didn't have a good experience with the watchers council either. I dare say it has... diminished our relationship this time around as well. But trusting me or not, she hasn't been able to hide her interest in you from me. Though, the way she scowled at you, I was sure you were one of those... big bads she occasionally mentions."
"So, you think I really am her husband?" Xander wondered eagerly.
Diana took his hand. "All I know is that I haven't seen Faith this happy since I've met her." She patted his hand then took their empty cups to the sink.
Upstairs, Faith smiled and snuggled back into her pillow, happy that Slayer hearing meant she didn't have to leave her warm bed to eavesdrop on Xander. And also glad that her watcher was reassuring him.
Buffy was a little annoyed. At first she hadn't liked Faith's 'group Slaying' idea. But after seeing the pride and joy of her friends when they bagged their own vamps, she had stopped complaining and had actually started liking spending time with them. It would have been even better if she could figure out a way to introduce Scott to that world without putting him in danger or risking losing him, but so far she'd come up empty on that front. And he was willing to accept that a couple of hours per night she was with her other friends. Plus it gave her time away from her mom, who was on a serious College Kick since finding out her SAT scores. Except that her friends were missing tonight. And it was annoying her. And it was annoying how much she'd grown to like the camaraderie of the group slaying. Except that Oz wasn't talking to Willow who wasn't talking to Cordelia who wasn't talking to Xander; and suddenly the whole Scooby Gang fell apart around her.
She had never really realized that the friendship between Willow and Xander was such a lynchpin in the group. And now that that pin had been lynched or pulled or whatever.
And she didn't even have Giles to talk to. He was away on his retreat for the weekend and wouldn't be back until Monday. She decided to head to Diana's house to see if Faith was interested in patrolling together.
"Faith! Buffy would like to know if you want to go patrolling with her!" Diana called up to Faith's room.
Those words woke both Xander and Faith. Faith knew she mostly yelled them so she didn't have to see Faith in her pajamas. Which looked an awful lot like her birthday suit. She hadn't always slept in the buff, but Xander had always liked that story of her doing it and was more than willing to join her when she did, that it had become habit. Plus, after Africa, he'd always kept the house uncomfortably warm. Uncomfortable unless you were naked. "Ugh. Down in a minute!" she yelled back.
"Crap, crap, crap." Xander muttered.
"I know. I was hoping we'd at least get the weekend together before we had to explain some things."
"Like the future?"
"Very much not telling them that." Faith said as she pulled a shirt over her head. "Take a lesson from Back to the Future there. It's dangerous to know too much about your own future."
"What about me?" Xander asked.
"You've got me to watch your ass. The others don't. At least not forever." Faith said. She tilted her head to literally watch his ass as he pulled on pants of his own. "Or as closely." she smirked as he turned around and caught her checking him out.
"Hey!" he yelped instinctively.
"Xander?" came Buffy's voice from the living room.
Faith's smirk only intensified. "Busted. Now you have to come with me."
"That was your plan all along!" Xander accused.
"Do I look like a guy with a plan?" Faith quoted. At a blank look from Xander she realized he hadn't seen the movie yet. "Never mind. You'll get that joke in like 10 years or so." She grabbed his arm and started pushing him out the door. "Let's go face the music."
"But he's Xander!" Buffy moaned.
"Exactly." Faith licked her lips while looking at him. "He's Xander. What? I thought you'd seen him in a Speedo?"
"Yeah but-"
"Yeah, that butt. Plus he's willing to fight evil even when there's nothing in it for him. Oz, I can already tell you, isn't going to be doing any fighting without Willow egging him on."
Xander perked up his ears at that, wondering if that was future knowledge or not.
"And you guys were fighting evil up in your room just now?" Buffy said accusingly.
"Hell no, B. I wore the poor guy out the other night. Neither of us can exactly walk straight right now. But don't worry, I'll work on building up his stamina quickly. I already know there's no keeping this guy out of the fight for long." Faith's smirk didn't waver.
"Xander, are you sure you're not under a spell or something?" Buffy asked.
Diana interrupted. "I can already tell you, Miss Summers, there is no magic involved other than typical teenage hormones and love."
"Love? LOVE!? He's known her for all of-"
"Ms. Summers!" Diana interrupted more forcefully. "I can tell you from my own observations that Mr. Harris is quite the catch. Were I 15 again..." she shot a glance at Faith. "I might be tempted myself. As it stands, I understand you have a beau of your own. I suggest you not patrol tonight, spend the night with him, and stop leveling your accusations at my Slayer."
Faith was almost as shocked at Diana's words as Buffy and Xander. Buffy left quietly not long after that. Faith couldn't hide the smirk on her face whenever DD entered a room for quite some time.
"I'm not sure I can do this." Xander complained.
"Would you rather she hear about us from Buffy?" Faith countered. "Better to be up front about it so she's less tempted to turn us into frogs."
"Willow has-"
"Ranidaphobia. Frog fear." Faith finished. "I know. She reserves that threat for the worst offenders."
"Is that even possible? I mean, Willow doing that to us?" Xander wondered.
"Today? Probably not. A couple of years though..."
Xander didn't answer and instead knocked on Willow's door. Faith automatically took up position on his left side. Where his blind spot would have been.
"Xander! And Faith." The enthusiasm in Willow's voice dipped significantly for the second guest.
"I didn't know it was possible to cry that much." Xander said.
"Oh, you didn't cry that much." Faith snarked.
Xander just glared.
Faith sighed. Lightening the mood was his job. "Look, neither of us is going to be her favorite person for a while. But she does forgive us and move on. I promise."
"You know it's freaky when you talk about the future like it's already happened, right?" Xander said glumly.
A/N: Do not own the Final Fantasy series or the Back to the Future series.
"Do I look like a guy with a plan?" comes from The Dark Knight. Also don't own. RIP Heath Ledger.