INESCAPABLE CONSEQUENCES
"You look bloody awful, Guy."
"Thanks. I feel bloody awful."
"Worried about tonight?"
"What do you think?"
The two men fell silent as they rode home from Clun late in the afternoon. After a strained pause, Guy turned toward Robin.
"I'm sorry, Robin. I didn't mean to bite your head off. I didn't get much sleep last night."
Robin nodded understandingly. He hadn't seen Guy look so wretched since the day, fifteen years ago, when he'd stood beside Meg on the platform in the town square in Nottingham, facing Isabella's executioner.
"I didn't sleep well, either, if it's any consolation."
"Neither did our wives, I expect."
"Marian said she'd have herself and Eleanor at your house by the time we got home. What about your younger children? No chance of them eavesdropping, is there?"
"No. Anna's under strict orders to keep them in their rooms."
Guy abruptly pulled his horse to a halt, and turned to look at his companion.
"I guess there's no way around this, is there?"
"No, I'm afraid not. He's got to be told. I'll be there, and Meg, and Marian. You won't be alone."
"Right now I feel like the most craven coward."
"You, a coward? I hardly think so. You were no coward when you saved the men of Nottingham from the prince's army, not to mention when you stood before the king in the Great Hall. You were the bravest man in the room that day. I was proud to call you my friend."
Guy smiled gratefully, but the smile soon faded. "This is different, Robin. I didn't give a damn what those people in the courtroom thought of me, with the exception of yourself and your gang, and Tuck, of course. This time it's my son who has to hear it."
"You cared about what King Richard thought of you."
Guy snorted. "Only because he held the power of life and death over me! It wasn't because I liked him personally. I didn't try to assassinate him twice because I liked him."
"Yet you named a son after him."
"After him, yes, but after Meg's brother, too, don't forget."
He caught Robin's smirk. "Well, I had to do something to show my gratitude! The man saved my life, after all!"
"That he did," Robin smiled. Even after many years of close friendship with Guy, he still found the workings of the man's mind and the depths of his heart to be a bundle of contradictions, at once both fascinating and exasperating.
"Guy, you didn't shrink back when you stood before the king, and you won't shrink back now."
"I know. I can't. I have to tell him the truth."
He gazed across the meadow toward Locksley, toward Gisborne Hall and his waiting son. His voice was soft, almost inaudible, when he spoke again.
"I'm never going to escape this, am I, Robin? It's never going to be over."
Robin knew what he meant. It wasn't just the talk with Rodger that Guy couldn't escape. It was his past—all of the terrible memories of hurt and grief and shame. There truly was no escaping it, and Robin would not make light of his pain by offering him trite words of comfort and inane platitudes. He reached out a hand instead, and touched Guy's shoulder.
"Come on, my friend, let's go home."
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"Do you know what this is about, Rodger?"
"How should I know?"
Rodger and Eleanor sat together on the sofa near the fireplace in Gisborne Hall. Their mothers had retired to the kitchen to talk alone, after instructing the children to stay put and wait for their fathers to arrive. Eleanor fidgeted in her seat. Rodger sat with his arms crossed and stared at the fire.
"I thought maybe your folks said something to you."
"No."
"You're not in trouble again, are you?"
"You would think so, wouldn't you? No, I'm not in trouble! You wish I was, is that it?"
"All right, you don't have to yell! And, no, don't be silly. It's just a little weird that your parents and mine want to talk to us at the same time, don't you think? What do they want to talk about?"
"Damned if I know," was the curt reply.
Eleanor bit back a hasty response. Not so long ago, she would have run straight to Rodger's parents to tattle on him for using bad words. But something was bothering him, and had been for several weeks now. If Rodger was in some sort of trouble, she didn't want to make matters worse for him. She chewed her lip instead, in an unconscious imitation of her father when he was perturbed, and joined Rodger in staring at the fire.
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Guy and Robin arrived at Gisborne Hall, and met their wives in the kitchen.
"Let's get this over with," said Robin.
The two sets of parents filed into the living area, and sat across from their offspring. Though his chair was made inviting with plenty of plump cushions, Guy perched on its edge as if he might leap from it and run at any moment.
Meg sat near Guy, and laid a comforting hand on his.
She's as scared as he is in reality, thought Robin. She's just better at hiding it. Guy always did wear his heart on his sleeve. We're all scared, afraid of how our children will take the news. But we're in this together, and there's some comfort in that.
"Children, we've been a bit backward in having this talk with you both, but we discussed it last night and decided it's time that you knew."
"Papa, I know all that stuff," interrupted Eleanor, with an exaggerated roll of her eyes. "I know where babies come from." She nudged Rodger. "Maybe you should explain it to Rodger. Use small words so he'll be sure to understand."
Rodger shoved her away from him. "Shut up, Eleanor!" he snapped.
"Rodger!" Guy barked. "Enough! And don't tell people to shut up, it's rude!"
Robin smiled inwardly at the idea of Guy giving lessons in polite speech and gentlemanly decorum to the son who had inherited his quick temper. The man had certainly come a long way, in theory if not always in practice.
"That's not what I'm talking about," he said to his daughter. Then, more sternly, "Eleanor, stop teasing Rodger and listen to me. This is important."
He got up, paced the floor for a moment to gather his thoughts, and then sat down again next to Marian.
"You know that Guy and I have been friends for a long time. You also know that we share a brother, your uncle Archer. What you may not know is that it hasn't always been this way between us."
"Uncle Guy, did you really work for Sheriff Vaisey? Was he a bad man? I've heard he was pretty awful. Why'd you work for him? And did you stab the Nightwatchman? Why?"
"Eleanor!" cried Marian. "Stop interrupting your father and pay attention!"
"Yes, Mama."
The parents were so focused on Eleanor's interruptions that they completely missed the expression of appalled surprise that passed over Rodger's face as the stabbing was mentioned.
"I take then, that you've heard of Sheriff Vaisey," Robin began again. "What about you, Rodger?"
Rodger nodded, his eyes downcast.
"What have you heard about him?"
"All I know is that he used to be the Sheriff of Nottingham a long time ago, before I was born," answered Eleanor. "There was a siege once, something to do with King John when he was Prince John, and Vaisey was killed and now Sir William is the Sheriff. Did you work for him, Uncle Guy? Mama says you did."
"Eleanor—"
"No, Robin, it's okay." Guy looked at Robin's eager-faced daughter, and his silent and withdrawn son.
"Yes, I worked for him for many years, as his lieutenant. I followed his orders and enforced the law for him."
"I've told you, Eleanor, that I was one of King Richard's personal guards," said Robin. "When I came back from the Crusades, I became an outlaw, along with Allan and Little John and Will Scarlett and Djaq. There were others, too, who are dead now. Are you starting to understand now how things were?"
"Why'd you get outlawed, Papa? I thought you did kind things for people, like bringing them food when they were hungry."
"I did, but there was more to it. When I returned from the Holy Land, I saw that things were bad in Locksley and in Nottingham. Vaisey was running things, and he was, well, he was a tyrant. Do you know what I mean by that?"
The children nodded.
"He treated the people harshly. He taxed them into poverty and punished them severely for every wrong, even little things. There were other issues, too, political issues that I won't go into right now. Suffice to say that I didn't agree with how things were done, and when I chose not to tolerate it any more, I ended up as an outlaw."
"Robin was on the wrong side of the law in my eyes," added Guy, "along with his followers. We—we fought each other for years. We tried to kill each other."
"Papa, you and Uncle Guy tried to kill each other?"
"We did. At one time, believe it or not, we hated each other."
"But you're friends now. What changed?"
"A lot of things changed. Shall we tell them the story, Guy?"
Guy sighed heavily, but, resigned to the full disclosure of the past, he slowly nodded his acquiescence.
"As it can't be avoided, we might as well. Would you like to start?"
Robin launched into their history, beginning with the day he and Much arrived home in Locksley. Guy was thankful for Robin's discretion. The man had obviously given the matter careful thought, and so the story he told was one fit for the ears of their children, with many of the grim details and much of the bloodshed left out. Marian added her own comments from time to time, as did Guy.
Meg said little. Her part in the drama had not yet been told. She watched the children's reactions instead. Eleanor's eyes glowed with excitement at what sounded to her like a tale of high adventure, but Rodger shrank further and further into the cushions of the sofa as the story progressed.
Robin did not get far, however, before Eleanor again broke into the conversation.
"Who killed Sheriff Vaisey?" she asked. "And Mama, you promised me you'd tell me who the Nightwatchman was!"
"That's coming, Eleanor, just be patient. It's hard to explain without telling you the rest of the story first."
"Somebody killed him, at the siege. I know, I overheard the smith and his brother and my friend Matthew talking about it."
Robin and Guy looked at each other. "Tell her, Robin."
Robin hesitated before replying. "Well, this is getting a bit ahead of my story, but we did, Eleanor. Guy and Archer and myself fought Vaisey and his guards in the castle, and Guy and I killed him."
"Oh!" said Eleanor. "But you worked for him, Uncle Guy. How come you killed him?"
"It was justice. He was an evil man. He killed a lot of innocent people. I saw that Robin was right about him. I was fighting on the wrong side when I worked for him. Robin, and Marian, convinced me of that."
Guy caught Marian's smile, and he knew what it meant. He's mad, you know that. Why do you work for him? she'd said to him once, a lifetime ago. You're a good man, Guy. You're not a killer. If only it had been true. If only he'd listened to her sooner.
"I have to tell you children something that's hard for me to admit, but you need to know," said Guy. "I wasn't a good man when I worked for Vaisey. I did things I'm ashamed of, things I regret to this day."
"Like stabbing the Nightwatchman?" asked Eleanor.
"Yes, that's one thing I regret."
"Who was he?"
Guy glanced at Marian.
"I'll tell them, Guy," she said. Then, turning to the children, she said, "The Nightwatchman wasn't a he, but a she."
"A woman?" exclaimed Eleanor. "Really? Wow! Anyone I know? Matilda? Or was it Djaq?"
"No, dear. It was me."
"Mama?" Eleanor shrieked. She started to laugh. "You were the Nightwatchman?"
"Calm down! And stop laughing, this is serious. Yes, I was. While your father was away in the crusade, I disguised myself and went out at night, giving food and medicine to people. No one but my father and Robin knew about it."
"But, Uncle Guy—"
"Sheriff Vaisey ordered Guy to kill the Nightwatchman on sight," said Robin. "Guy had no way of knowing it was Marian when he wounded her."
"This is why we're having this talk with you children tonight," said Meg. "We know you've been hearing stories about our family's history from others in the village. We want you to hear them from us instead."
"We have a lot to tell you still," said Robin, "some things that are hard for us and that may be hard for you to hear."
"Rodger," said Meg gently, "what's wrong? What is it, darling?" She got up from her chair and went to her son. "Are you crying? I know, I'm sorry, this is hard—"
Rodger looked past her kind eyes to his father, who he loved more than anyone in the world except Mother.
"Tell me you didn't do it, Father! It's not true, it can't be!" he suddenly burst out.
"Rodger, it's okay," said Marian soothingly. "It was a long time ago. Your father didn't know it was me—"
"No!" Rodger cried. "There was another. He said you did it!"
"Rodger, what are you talking about?"
"The boy, the boy in Nottingham, he told me you killed his grandfather! I told him he was a liar. My father would never have done that. But he said you did!"
Meg stood up to make way for Guy, who hunkered down in front of Rodger. The boy's cheeks were wet with distraught, almost frantic tears. Guy gripped his shoulders and looked into his face.
"What did this boy say to you?" Guy demanded.
"Tell me you didn't, Father! Tell me he's wrong!"
"What did he say? Answer me!"
"He—he said his grandfather was a miner, at the Treeton Mine," Rodger choked, the words pouring out of him in a jumble as Guy shook him. "The mines weren't safe. He led—the other miners—a strike. He wouldn't go back into the mine. Sheriff told you to kill him. The boy said, he said—you stabbed him—you killed him, in front of his son and—the others, the other miners."
Guy slowly stood up.
"It's not true, Father! That boy made it up! Didn't he?"
No one spoke. No one answered him. No one could meet his eyes, least of all his father. It did not take Rodger long to realize why.
"You did kill him. It is true."
He sprang up from the sofa, and faced his father, the man who was his hero, the center of his world, the man he trusted and believed in and wanted to be.
"You did kill his grandfather! You are a murderer, just like he said!"
"Rodger, no! Sit down and listen!"
Blinded by tears and horror, Rodger stumbled toward the front door, yanked it open, and ran out into the night. Robin went after him.
"Rodger, come back here!" he shouted. But the boy had already disappeared into the blackness.
Guy sank down into his chair, his face buried in his hands.
"Oh, my God Almighty, what have I done?"