*Flashback- August 2010*
A full three years had gone by since Adam was in Nampa, Idaho. That meant three years since he left Tampa. Which also meant it had been three years since he left Lita. He thought about her everyday. She was there whenever he closed his was there whenever he saw a woman with red hair or any sort of tattoo on her arm. She was there anytime he heard anyone say 'hon', that was what she always called him. She always seemed to show up everywhere, she still had that kind of effect on him.
There was never a day that went by that he didn't miss her. He missed her every single day. He missed her smile. He missed her laugh. He missed her smell. He missed her voice. He missed her stupid missed her love. He missed everything about her.
He could not stop thinking about her, yet here he was three years later, in a bar drinking his thoughts away, even though there was nothing keeping him away from her anymore. Yes, if he wanted to, then Adam could go back to her. He could go back to Tampa, but he didn't know how he could go now. She probably hated him, like he hated himself, for leaving her in the middle of the night. How could he possibly explain why he left in the first place? The truth would probably break her now as much as it would three years ago. He had to keep telling himself he did this for her, he only thought about her when he made his decision, but that only helped for a little bit and then he started hating himself again.
Adam tried to ask Christian how Lita was every time he talked to him, but his friend always said she was 'fine'. Christian also told him that he could try and call her and actually talk to her instead of hanging up after he heard her voice and ask her how she is himself. He called her every now and then just to hear her her voice which was the only way he knew she was okay. But there were times where he heard distress in her voice and wished he could just go back. Well, he could go back now but he didn't know how. He didn't know how he could face her after so long. What if she forgot all about him? What if she actually did hate him like he thought. He would not be able to handle that. He wanted her to hate him in case something were to happen to him so it wouldn't hurt her, but now, everything was okay and he wouldn't be able to handle it if she did hate him. He still loved her no matter how hard he tried to just forget about her. Forgetting about her was much easier said then done.
He took a big swig of the drink in front of him before he took out his phone from his pocket and dialed an all too familiar number. There was no answer so he decided to call multiple times before she actually picked up.
"Hello?" There was the voice he was missing. He didn't know what he would do if she actually changed her number in all these years. Christian most likely wouldn't give him her number.
"Hello?" He heard once again and he immediately realized she sounded tired and was probably sleeping when he called. After all, Nampa was two hours behind Tampa. It was past eleven in Nampa which meant it was past one in the morning in Tampa.
"Okay. Thanks for calling at one in the morning with loud music in the background and not talking. Some of us actually do have to work on Saturday mornings. I really appreciate it." He felt bad, but the next word leaving her mouth before she ended the call made him smile once again. "Jackass." She was clearly annoyed and angry. It made him smile because she was never able to stay angry with him for a long time no matter how hard she tried. He usually always did something either very stupid on purpose or something very sweet which made her laugh or smile and forget why she was angry in the first place. But what he did three years ago was one of the very few things that he couldn't fix with his goofiness or sweetness.
He sighed while putting his phone back in his pocket. He gestured the bartender to get him another drink which he knew he would end up regretting the next day. At least it was Saturday the next day and he didn't have to be at work.
"Adam!" He turned in his stool slightly when he heard a familiar voice shout as the owner of the voice sat on the stool next to him.
"Hey Torrie," he smiled at her. She had been drinking too, but she wasn't drunk, just a bit tipsy which was why she was fully aware that his smile was fake.
"What's wrong?" Torrie asked frowning. "You were just smiling like an idiot not too long ago."
"Nothing," he lied.
"Liar. If there was nothing wrong with you, then you wouldn't be drinking as much as you already have so far tonight."
He raised a brow. "You were watching me?"
"I like the view." She winked.
She didn't know how much those words effected him. Not because she said them, but because it reminded him of a moment he had with Lita a month or so before he left. She basically said the same words, but after that, she told him she was wondering how their kids would look. He too wondered how their kids would look and now he would never know. Well, as far as he knew.
"You're thinking about her," Torrie said breaking the silence that overcame them a few minutes ago. She was one of the few people in Nampa he actually talked to. She was the only person in Nampa that even knew about Lita. His friends in Nampa had suspicions that there was a girl always on his mind since he was never in a relationship the couple of years they knew him. Some even thought he was gay, but he didn't care. He didn't even know why he told Torrie. Whatever the reason, she was a good friend of his who he decided to confide in one night. She was the only person other than Christian, and Dawn who wasn't in the dark anymore, who knew of the reason why he left his girlfriend in the first place.
"I can go back to Tampa now," Adam replied staring at the drink in front of him. "There's nothing keeping me away from there now."
"You mean there's nothing keeping you away from her." Adam said nothing. "You're obviously still hung up on her."
"That doesn't matter. She probably hates me."
She was sad for him. She know how much he loved his ex-girlfriend. "I'm one hundred percent sure if you go back now and tell her the truth, then she will forgive you. She's going to understand. And if she doesn't, then she's stupid and doesn't deserve you." Adam finally decided to look at her only to glare at her. "Wow. Someone is getting defensive."
The glare disappeared from his face as he sighed and said nothing.
"Here's the thing," Torrie started to say, "you know I'm trying to get over Billy since we broke up a month ago. And you're obviously trying hard to get over her. I mean, if you're not going back to Tampa, then I'm sure you want to get over her."
"What are you getting at?" He asked confused not knowing if this had a point or not.
"I've heard the way to get over someone is to get under someone else. So-"
"So you want to use one another so I can get over Lita and you can get over Billy?" She nodded. He was shocked she would even say that because they were friends and not random people. "We're friends."
She shrugged. "So? Ever heard of 'friends with benefits'? Or even a 'rebound'? Both can actually turn into something more later on if we want."
"Or it could ruin our friendship."
"That too, but how about just having some fun now so I can forget about Billy and you can forget about Lita." Adam said nothing. He was still shocked she would even suggest that. She got up from the stool. "I take that as a 'no'. You have my number and know where to find me if you change your mind." She took a couple of steps and was about to leave until...
"Wait," Adam called after her which made a smirk form on her face as she turned around to face him while he got up and walked towards her, stopping directly in front of her. "Your place or mine?"
*End of Flashback*
Adam woke up the next day from a flashback dream. He shook his head as he thought about that horrible decision. He didn't want to take Torrie up on her offer, but she said she needed to stop thinking about her ex and he needed to do the same so he thought that would be a way he would stop thinking about Lita. Oh boy, did he regret it the morning after. At the moment when he accepted Torrie's offer, he thought about how different she was from his ex; Torrie was a blonde while Lita was a redhead. Torrie was a girly girl while Lita was a tomboy. Torrie's wardrobe mainly consisted of dresses while Lita hated to wear them. Torrie had no tattoos while Lita had a couple. Torrie was very social while Lita wasn't an introvert, but she wasn't a social butterfly either. Those were just one of the many differences between the two woman which Adam thought would help him forget about Lita. He dead wrong. He was never able to forget about the redhead.
He and Torrie had practiced their 'friends with benefits' relationship for a bit over two months before he realized that was defiantly no way to get over his ex girlfriend that he decided to ask Torrie out who accepted. They both knew that they both thought of the other as a rebound, they just didn't care. Like Torrie said, "sometimes, rebounds can turn into more." In this case, she was wrong. They dated for about six months and Adam didn't think it was fair for her that he was still using her to get over Lita when it seemed like she was over Billy and actually started to have feelings for him more than a friend. That broke her heart and eventually ruined their friendship. At first, she said she understood and they managed to remain friends for another two months before it was completely weird for the two and they accepted their friendship was ruined.
Adam looked over at the clock in his room and saw it was four in the morning, so he decided he would try to go back to sleep. Sleep did come back, but not soon enough because his brain decided it didn't want to shut up and stop thinking about certain events. He also started to think about whether or not Lita actually tried to move on too.
Lita took Ethan to the park that afternoon. He actually had a play date with one of his little friends, Sophia, from preschool. It was a good thing Lita got along with her parent, John, and vice versa because most of them stuck their noses up in the air when they found out she was a single parent who never had the other parent in her kids life. They always assumed Adam walked out on Lita when he found out about her pregnancy. Only Jacob's parents, Matt and Ashley, and John knew the truth since they were actually pretty great friends with the mother-son duo because of their children and they got along pretty well. There were some other parents who didn't say anything, but the ones that did never said anything to her face, but that didn't mean she didn't hear their whispers, especially now since Adam was back. She didn't care about anything they said about her, but if her son ever heard any of their words, then she would end up beating the crap out of everyone who said anything that effected him in any way.
John, was one of the very few who never said anything about her. Some of the parents actually talked crap about him too since his daughters mother walked out on them right after she gave birth. Most didn't know the truth, but they correctly assume that was what happened. Sophia's mother never wanted her and was close to having an abortion but her father plead with her mother not to have one and he would take care of their child alone.
"They're okay, hot stuff," John said after he rejoined Lita on the bench at the park. Both kids were playing at the sandbox and he went to see if they were okay since it looked like one of them fell.
Lita rolled her eyes at the name is called her. He always called her that which made her call him something he wasn't too fond of. "Thanks, Johnny."
He scowled. "How many times have I told you not to call me that?"
"And how many times have I told you not to call me 'hot stuff'? Deal with it." A smirk formed on her face before she added the next part. "Johnny."
The smile on his face disappeared and his tone changed to that of a serious one. "I actually wanted to talk to you about something."
"What's wrong?" The redhead asked with concern present on her face and voice.
"Sophia asked me about her mom the other day."
"Oh," was all she was able to say at the moment. She was kind of surprised by what he just said. It's not that they never talked about their child's other parent to one another, it was just surprising to her that Sophia finally asked about her mother. "What did you say?"
"Nothing. I pretended I didn't hear what she said and then thankfully, someone decided to call and she forgot all about it. I feel horrible, but I don't know what to say to her."
Lita nodded in understanding. "I know. I was pretty lucky in a way I guess that Adam decided to show up right around the time Ethan started to ask about him."
"I know death is hard to explain to a little kid but I want to tell her that her mom is dead. That's much easier than the truth."
"You can't do that. What if her mom wants back in her life?"
He scoffed. "No way am I gonna let her be apart of my daughters life. She doesn't deserve that."
"What about Sophia? Isn't it fair for her to know her mother if she chooses?"
"I'm gonna protect her from that bitch as much as I can. She left her once, she could come back and leave her again. I don't want my daughter to go through that." He looked up at Lita and noticed she had a deep frown on her face and was looking at the ground. "What's wrong?"
She shook her head, still looking at the ground. "Nothing."
"Hot stuff-" That earned him a glare. At least she was finally looking up at him.
"Don't call me that. Look, we're talking about you and Sophia right now so I don't really want to start talking about me, but I understand where you're coming from. Sophia is four, I'm 31 and I can't... I have these walls up every time Adam is near me. I was 26 when he first left, that was hard for me to deal with and I know it'll be hard if I actually let him in my life and he leaves again. So obviously it's going to be difficult for a little kid. I mean, we don't even know if her mom is going to come around, but I'm just saying that you have to answer Sophia's question as honest as you can without letting her feel that her mom left because of her."
"But the bitch did."
Lita sighed. "I know. But she's only four. You can't tell her that. If she asks you questions about her mom, just tell her as much as you can. Just refrain from calling her mom a 'bitch' during the stories."
"This is not easy."
Lita nodded in agreement. "Mommy didn't want you is much harder to explain than daddy didn't want mommy and Ethan doesn't even know the whole truth."
"Both are difficult to explain to a little kid. I just... I don't know what to tell her. I guess I will take your advice but for how long do I hide the truth from her? Is telling her the truth ever going to be easy? Isn't it always going to be hard? Like even when she's a teenager. Those years are pretty tough when they're going through the awkward phase, I can't tell her then either can I? Can I ever tell her her mom didn't want her?"
"Probably not, but you cannot tell her that her mom is dead."
John nodded in agreement, but, "that would be so much easier." It was quiet for a moment between the two. "So how's Ethan dealin' with life with his father?"
"Pretty good actually. I have work tomorrow at six, so he's going to be staying over Adam's house tonight. He loves having both of his parents, but he wants us both to be together and I don't... I can't do that. He asked Dawn why his mommy and daddy can't live together like her and Christian. And then she told me last night that he asked Adam the same thing earlier that day."
"Is that why you don't date?"
Lita shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, he never expressed anything like that before, but now I guess you can say yes. Obviously I think about Ethan every time I'm about to do something that I know will effect him. And now that he actually expressed his parents wanting to be together, I don't think I can do anything now. Not that I wanted to in the first place." John simply nodded as the duo fell into conversation about other things until...
"Hi." The duo looked up and saw the owner of the voice.
Lita looked over at John for a brief moment before she returned her attention back to the intruder. "Hey Adam." She glanced between the two males before she spoke up again. "Adam, this is John."
"Oh, I thought it was Chris."
Lita chose to ignore him and continued after his interruption. "He's a friend as well as a parent of one of Ethan's friends. John, this is Adam, he's um... Ethan's dad."
"Hey," the two males greeted one another. And then it became awkwardly quiet.
"Um, you're a little early," Lita said breaking the silence after a while.
"You said three. It's past three."
"Daddy!" All three turned their attention to the little boy that came over to them along with the little girl.
"Hi buddy." Adam smiled hugging his son. "Who's your friend?" He asked gesturing to the little girl besides him.
"Sophia."
"She's my daughter," John spoke up. "You ready to go princess?" Sophia nodded with a smile on her face. "Bye Ethan. Bye Adam, nice meetin' ya." He smirked turning his attention to the redhead. "Bye hot stuff."
Lita rolled her eyes. "Bye Johnny. Bye Sophia." The father-daughter son duo left with the three staying behind for a moment. "Um, make sure he gets to school on time tomorrow." She turned her attention to Ethan and smiled at him, kneeling down so they were the same height. "Bye sweetie. Mommy will see you tomorrow after work okay?"
He nodded and hugged her. "Bye mommy. I love you."
"I love you too sweetie." They ended the hug and she got up and glanced at Adam before speaking to him. "Bye." With that said, she left.
Adam couldn't help but express jealousy when he talked to Christian later that night on the phone. He learned from Christian how John was a single father and how he and Lita formed a support group of sorts between the two of them. He also informed Adam that the two never took their friendship to the next step since neither of them were looking for anything other than a friend who understand what they were going through. And during one of his rambles, Christian let it slip that Dawn thought that if Lita were to move on anytime soon, she would probably move on with John since the two did flirt a lot some times. Then Christian did some damage control when he realized what he said and told Adam that it was just harmless flirting and he didn't think she was actually wanted more than a friendship from John. Adam simply said he didn't care and made an excuse to end the call which told Christian that was far from the truth. He did care.
Thanks for reading. Thanks for the reviews.