Regina Mills was not a happy woman that night; or more like a very conflicted one. On one hand, she finally had her baby back after five years of disappointments and dead ends; but on the other, her heart was breaking piece by piece at the life her five year old child led.
The first inkling she had was the sight of the bruises on her thighs, and then the hysterical recounting of how she got them. And if she thought that this was bad, she sure was proven wrong when she pulled the ragged gown off the tiny body and started washing away the dirt. Her eyes nearly bugged out of her skull at the numerous bruises and barely healed gashes on her back and stomach, and her heart wrenched every time Stella winced or hissed from the contact with them. Regina tried to be as gentle as possible with her, but some of them were still pretty recent, and therefore, quite sore to the touch, let alone getting rubbed with a sponge drenched with soap and water, no matter how gentle it was.
A small whimper left her mouth, her small features immediately taken over by fear when Regina tried to wash away the dried up blood on her forehead. The gash looked fresh, and couldn't be more than a few hours old, judging by how the skin was still soft around it. She soothed her, the hand that was previously helping support her weight on the edge of the basin, now reached for the small fidgeting hands, and held onto them, in a silent gesture of comfort. She was glad when Stella immediately grabbed onto it, a small smile tugging on the corners of her lips when she felt how she relaxed.
Once all the blood was gone from the gash, and she was able to take a closer look at it, her confusion deepened. It didn't seem to be made by a tree branch, for it had almost perfect edges.
"Stella, how did you get this gash on your head?" she asked softly, her eyes studying the terrified pair that were looking at her searchingly.
She saw how she swallowed hard, how tight her grasp on her hand had gotten, and after a long moment of silence, she finally averted her gaze before she sighed, "I broke a plate this morning, and when Daddy took me to my room, he pushed me hard inside and I tripped and hit my head against the foot of the bed" she recounted, though her voice was barely audible but it was loud enough for Regina to nearly faint.
She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the side of her head, her heart jumping slightly with joy when she felt Stella lean into it, "you're safe now, baby" she whispered, as she rested her forehead against her temple.
And now she was lying in bed, one arm trapped under Stella while her other hand stroked her hair as the latter slept. Leopold had fell asleep the second his head touched the pillow, and she couldn't blame him. It was almost, if not past, midnight by the time the Physician left, and they finally had a second to breathe.
She was still in her clothes, since she hadn't really had a chance to change in the midst of everything that happened, and she was suddenly very glad that she opted to wear one of her simpler outfits instead of an elaborate gown, for those damned things were not very comfortable, and it was starting to look like she was going to sleep like this. She had tried to pry her arm away from Stella so she can get up and change, only for her entire body to stiffen and a string of whimpering protests to leave her sleeping form, making Regina reconsider her actions and immediately soothe her instead.
And as exhausted as she was, there were a few reasons why she couldn't sleep. One of which was the very uncomfortable corset that was hugging her figure, the dress may have been simple but she still had to wear the wretched thing. She craned her neck behind her and strained her eyes to locate the gown she had been wearing that morning, and found it still hanging on the hook right next to the privacy screen. She looked back at her sleeping daughter and husband, all she had to do was get the gown and change. She didn't need to go behind the screen, Leopold was fast asleep so there was no chance he will see her, and this way if Stella even looks like she's going to wake up, she can lull her back to sleep.
And so, with that plan in mind, she wrapped the arm that was previously stroking Stella's hair around her sleeping form, leaned closer to the girl, and murmured kisses into her hair as she pulled her other arm from under her head. Stella stirred a bit, rolled over to the other side, before she settled again, completely freeing Regina's arm in the process. She carefully slid from under the covers, careful not to trip over her discarded shoes from earlier, and tip toed to where the gown hang. She slowly lifted it off the hook, and quickly made her way towards the bed, her eyes not leaving the small, curled form beneath the covers for one second.
Once she finally made it back to the bed, she threw the gown on it, and made quick work of pulling her gown over her head, before her fingers pulled at the lace holding the corset around her body. Her sighs of relief kept getting deeper and more exhilarating as the lace slid from each hoop, and with the last hoop, she nearly groaned in pleasure once she felt her body released from it. She relished in the feel of the cool winter breeze on her bare skin for a couple of moments, before she reached for the night gown and pulled it over her head.
Her eyes hadn't left Stella the entire time, and now with the whole corset debacle solved, she was forced to face the other reasons why she couldn't- or more like wouldn't- fall asleep. She was absolutely terrified!
She was terrified to sleep, only to wake up and find her baby gone once more. Even if she knew in her heart that this was reality, she had no guarantee that nothing bad will happen in the dead of the night and she will lose her child once more. After all, that's how she lost her the first time around.
Her hands were now in her hair, pulling at the pins and releasing the strands from their elaborate do. She had barely pulled the last pin out of her hair, when she caught the faint shivering of Stella's body. She placed the pin on the nightstand with the others, and was about to climb into bed once more, when Stella almost whipped around onto her back, her face covered in sweat, as she shook her head from side to side. Regina immediately scrambled onto the bed next to her, pulled her into her arms and tried to lull her back to sleep, but the slight trembling was now becoming violent shaking, and she realized with a heavy heart, that she had to wake her up. She knew that chances are, if she woke her up, she might not fall back asleep again.
She tried tightening her arm around her as a last resort, as she continued to murmur kisses and soothing words into her hair, but to no avail. And so with a deep defeated sigh, she shook her gently, "Stella" she called softly, "baby wake up, it's only a bad dream. Just open your eyes, you're safe" she instructed calmly, though her heart was breaking at the tears that were now falling past the screwed shut eyes. It took her a few moments of shaking and calling, before the terrified eyes flew open in a panic.
They were wild, filled with fear, and Regina was glad that they left a night lamp lit next to her for it helped Stella's eyes focus on her mother's face. Regina already had both arms wrapped around her, as she held her pain-filled eyes steady, one hand stroking her cheek gently, and whiping away at the tears.
"Mamma?" Stella whimpered hopefully.
"It's alright baby, I'm right here. It was just a dream" Regina soothed.
She gladly welcomed the small child, when she wiggled even closer to her, and buried her face into her chest. She felt how her arms tried to wrap around her, and so she tightened her own, and moved onto her back, taking Stella with her, so that now she was sitting in her lap. Stella wasted no time in balling up against her body, one arm going around her waist, her fist clenching around the back of the gown, while the other found the neckline and grabbed onto it, as her head rested over her mother's chest. The rhythmic beating of Regina's heart helped calm her down, and soon enough, her breathing almost synchronized with it. Regina wordlessly pulled the covers over both of them, before resuming her soothing stroking of her hair.
She didn't know why, or what made her do it, but she started humming. It was a tune she had heard one of the maids hum to her dozing off infant, and ironically it had soothed her as well, and right now it was the only thing that came to mind.
That was how she had spent her entire night; either soothing her sleeping whimpers, or her waking fears. It was almost sun up by the time Stella finally fell into a semi-peaceful sleep, and Regina fell into an exhausted one. And even though it was almost noon by the time she woke up, she was still drained. Leopold had just left to tend to matters of the Kingdom, and to inform the rest of the castle staff of their intention to keep Stella's return a secret, leaving her alone with a still sleeping Stella.
They were both on their sides, with Stella's back pressed against Regina's stomach and chest. Her hair was disheveled and covering part of her face, which added to the allure of the sight. She reached for the strands on her face, and gently brushed them back, before she bent down and pressed yet another lingering kiss to her forehead.
"Mamma?" Stella wondered fearfully.
"Yes, baby" Regina answered lovingly.
Stella rolled onto her back before she finally pried her eyes open, and met her mother's.
"Good morning" Regina greeted affectionately, though her eyes saddened a little at the look of fear and pain in Stella's eyes.
"I was scared that it would only be a dream" she confessed, and Regina's heart broke.
"It's not a dream baby, I'm right here and I am not going anywhere and neither are you" she promised, smiling a little at the hint of trust, relief and hope that crept into her daughter's eyes.