Just Always Be Waiting For Me

Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, all rights go to their respective owners.

Talking to Kester had been somewhat helpful, but he was still having nightmares and he still hadn't mustered up the courage to tell Severus. He could walk into battle and willingly die at the hands of Voldemort for the greater good, but he couldn't admit to Severus Snape that he needed him to sleep at night for his own greater good. Voldemort was evil and Harry didn't care what he mocked or chided him about, but he really did respect and like Severus and if the man were to use this against him, he wasn't sure he'd be able to spend the rest of his life tied to Severus if the man used his confession as a sort of ammunition against him. If it were anyone else he wouldn't have a problem telling them that he couldn't sleep, and asking if he could have a kip with them. Of course it had to be Snape, nothing could ever be easy for him.

With classes steadily becoming more and more stressful, and his Head Boy duties were becoming more and more inconvenient. He'd briefly considered renouncing his position and allowing McGonagall to bestow the honor on another student. The lack of sleep was really starting to get to him, and he wasn't excelling the way he should have. The only good thing that seemed to be going for him at the moment was the Quidditch team. Despite having to replace nearly the entire team, he'd been able to put together a formidable group of players. The only player he'd been able to retain was Ginny and she was a force to be reckoned with when it came to being a Chaser. If she was an amazing seeker she was even better Chaser. Holly, the girl from his first day of Transfiguration had also managed to make the team as their Keeper. She was incredible, she would knock the quaffle away from the goal post without even a second thought.

"Oi! Badges! Look out!" Holly shouted at him as he was intercepted by a bludger, and was knocked off his broom. Luckily, Ginny was a quick thinker and managed to give him a soft landing. He groaned as he floated onto the ground, a bludger to the stomach was no joke. He'd been so busy watching the Chasers work together that he hadn't even been paying attention to his new Beaters: Sean and Jon. They had the skill of Fred and George, and the twinliness, but they were a bit more reckless than the Weasley twins and that was saying something.

"Harry, are you okay? Do you want me to go and get someone?" Ginny asked landing beside him and tossing her broom aside.

"I'm not fine, but you don't have to get anyone," he said through gritted teeth and managed to pick himself up off the ground. Clutching his stomach he looked around at the array of worried faces that were in front of him.

"We're so sorry," Sean insisted. "We didn't mean to get you there!" Jon finished off. "We just meant to put a bit of fright into yah! Honest!"

"It's alright, you were just doing your jobs," Harry offered them a ridged smile.

"You need to go to the Hospital Wing," Ginny said glaring at the two third year boys in front of them.

"It's alright. I'll just have Severus take care of it," he shook his head. "Can you finish up practice, Gin?"

"Yeah, of course," she grinned worriedly. "Do you want one of us to come back to the castle with you?"

"No, I'm fine, honest."

Severus was none too pleased when Harry came in early from practice and was sporting injuries. He made Harry strip off all of his gear and lay down on the sofa. He did a quick diagnostic scan on him and went to retrieve the suitable potions from his personal store. Harry had to admit that there were definitely perks to living with and even being married to a Potions Master. Severus tilted a number of potions down his throat and then made Harry pull off his shirt so that he could apply the bruising salve. It turned out that the rogue bludger had broken a few of his ribs and caused a bit of internal bruising. Severus carefully administered the salve and Harry hissed as his well calloused fingers started to work it into the injured area.

Afterwards, Severus sent him to the shower and made him sit down and to have a meal.

"I'm sorry I'm so much work," Harry apologized through a mouth full of mashed potatoes.

"You are not work, just clumsy and a bit reckless. It's not a great match," Severus corrected him.

"I don't mean just this," Harry said gesturing to his injury and wincing when his moves had become to careless. "I'm sorry that I have nightmares that end in screaming, and that I wake you up all night and that I can only manage to sleep when you're in the same room as me. I'm sorry that I have to have a therapist because I can't seem to get a handle on it all and that you have to be married to me even. I mean you've sacrificed enough, and now you're saddled with me when you could be off doing what you'd like."

"I think I much preferred the Potter that I got saddled with this summer," Severus mused,

"Yeah me too," Harry said miserably and pushed a bit of roast around his plate.

"I also imagine that I am no walk in the park. We are married, even if it is against our will, we must learn to coexist and sometimes that means helping one another through times of trouble. Otherwise, this is going to be a very long journey through life for the both of us," Severus said taking a drink of tea.

"You're being awfully nice to me," Harry grinned across the table at him.

"I don't know how to be that and you know it," Severus scowled and Harry couldn't help but laugh in response. This caused Severus to scowl even more and Harry gripped his ribs when he couldn't stop laughing. "Now about this sleeping issue. What do you mean you can't sleep if I'm not in the room?"

"You heard that, huh?" Harry sighed and looked up at him.

"I hear everything, Potter. I was a very skilled spy after all. It's my job to hear things most people wouldn't."

This effectively shut him up and he felt the color rising in his cheeks. He was busy mentally kicking himself as Severus looked over at him expectantly.

"Well...you see...when you'er in the room. I don't know why exactly, but I don't really have nightmares, or dreams that I remember at all," he said staring down at his hands embarrassedly.

"Why?" Severus pressed on.

"I just well. I don't know! I guess I feel safe when you're around. Like nothing bad is going to happen, because of all the looking out you've done for me in the past."

"Doesn't knowing that I'm a few doors down do anything to quell your fear or your nightmares?" Severus asked him confusedly.

"It might of before the war. I don't know I just can't help but worry that someone could sneak right into my room and do away with me before you even had the chance to get out of bed. I know I sound like a complete idiot and I didn't even mean to tell you! I was just going to deal with it."

"If by dealing with it you mean continuing to suffer through these nightmares, then I'm afraid I don't think it's a very full proof plan on your part," Severus said skeptically. "Or a very practical one for either of us."

"Yeah, I'm sorry," Harry said looking away when the blush started to rise in his cheeks. "I just don't know what we're supposed to do about it."

"The answer, no matter how uncomfortable, is fairly obvious is it not?" The older man asked and turned his gaze on Harry who felt his blush deepen.

"It's not like you want to share a bed with me, or I with you," Harry started and Severus held up a hand to stop him.

"It's not about what either of us want at this point, it's about what's going to be most practical and helpful to the both of us. Neither of us are running on full when we aren't getting a full night of sleep."

Harry couldn't even find it in himself to respond to the man's solution. He and Snape sharing the same bed? There was no possible way that would ever work out for anyone involved. He knew that they were married, but at the same time it wasn't like a happy marriage. You wouldn't read a story about a couple who ended up like this in any of those love stories that Ginny was so fond of. This wasn't even a love story, and part of him knew that now that he was forced into this marriage that there was almost a 100% chance that he would never know what it was like to fall in love, and if he did it wouldn't never fruition into anything of value. He felt bad for Severus as well, because he knew what the man had sacrificed for their cause and now that he was free of all of that, he was now bound to Harry for life instead. It was hard to lead a life of freedom when you had to worry about tugging another person along.

"We can find a way to make this as accommodating as possible for the both of us," Severus continued, effectively snapping him out of his thoughts. "For now you will take the normal dosage of Dreamless Sleep Potion on three nights of the week, and you will sleep in your own room. On the other four nights, you will stay the night in my bed. It will take some getting used to for both of us."

The next morning at breakfast, Harry could say that he'd had a good nights sleep thanks to Dreamless Sleep, but he wasn't sure how well he would sleep that night. It was the first night that he was meant to share the bed with Severus and it was daunting. It wasn't as if he hadn't shared a bed with a bloke before, hell he was gay, it was just that Severus was different than anyone he had ever met. He was busy shredding a piece of toast when someone sat down beside of him. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he realized who it was.

"Did you plan on avoiding me forever?" Draco asked amused. "I mean you are married to my Godfather, it was a bit inevitable that we would come face to face at some point."

"Which is exactly why I had planned to avoid you for as long as humanly possible. I don't fancy being around for when Severus realizes what happened between us. The last thing I need is for him to jump to the wrong conclusion."

"I didn't realize that things were quite so serious between you," Draco smirked and Harry scowled darkly at him.

"They're not. I just don't want that to come up at all if possible. I don't want to have to explain myself over something that happened before I even knew any of this was going to happen. It's not like I exactly planned at being at Hogwarts and married to Snape come September."

"Fate doesn't care for our plans," Draco shrugged and took a bite of his porridge.

"Why are you sitting with me?" Harry asked bluntly and turned to Draco to gauge his response.

"You're in my spot," the blonde shrugged and continued eating.

"Your spot?" Harry asked confused. "Your spot is at the end of the Gryffindor table?"

"Yeah, it's prime location, and most people are too afraid to sit near me."

"You're not supposed to sit at other houses tables," Harry tried to reprimand him.

"Cool your Head Boy badge there, I'm an eighth year student who doesn't live in the dorms, I think it hardly matters at this point. Besides, Lovegood did it, why can't I?"

"Luna didn't scare off everyone with just her presence."

"Speak for yourself. It's not exactly like I scared you away, and I'm not exactly welcome at the Slytherin table. They don't take well to betraying your entire family and don't seem to find coming to the enemy's help to be very impressive."

"Don't you have any other friends?" Harry asked arching an eyebrow at the blonde.

"Don't you?" Draco replied evenly.

"Touche."

His accidental breakfast with Draco had temporarily managed to take his mind off of his impending night with Severus, and well the rest of the nights that were to be spent to him as well. He kept telling himself that if he could just make it through this night, he could make it through all of the others as well. This was going to be the hardest, getting over the hump was always the hardest part. He just hoped that he could fall asleep, nothing would be worse than laying awake in bed all night next to a sleeping Snape. Maybe he could just fly his broom after dinner until he couldn't stand himself any longer and didn't have any other choice but to fall asleep, or run up and down the stairs in front of the Great Hall until he couldn't bare it any longer. There had to be a way to just sleep through it all and get up in the morning and act like it was any other morning. He couldn't help but wish that Hermione were here because she would definitely have ideas of what he could do. He knew he could fire call her, but he didn't want to interrupt her studies. All he could hope was that this night passed swiftly and that they got through it without any qualms. But he was Harry Potter and things rarely ran smoothly where he seemed to be concerned.

A/N: I hope you like it! Things will start picking up between Harry and Severus soon I promise! I hope everyone had a good weekend, I met Matt Smith this weekend it was pretty terrific. Thanks for reading and reviewing!