The unpleasant undersea adventure continues, but fortunately, Bill and Lance have Evil Pretty Bomber cornered.
DISCLAIMER: Contra belongs to Konami, whereas Bomberman still remains a property of Hudson Soft as of March 1, 2012. WarioWare, on the other hand, is owned by Nintendo. Any songs "used" throughout the course of this fanfic are properties of their respective owners, along with any characters that aren't within the three franchises listed here, unless stated otherwise.
Chapter 6: Under the polluted sea - Part II
[Interlude BGM: Rukifellth's Theme (Bomberman 64: The Second Attack!)]
Elsewhere above the Earth's atmosphere, Purple Basilisk and Sniper Bomber were greeted with disappointing news from the surviving henchmen that were driven out of the United States. The purple-skinned humanoid alien, however, didn't take the news well. He was sure the Red Falcon Empire would be virtually unstoppable with the Super Titanium alloy at their disposal this time.
"I gave your robotic comrades the protection guaranteed to nullify every man-made weapon thrown at you, and yet still two guys miraculously defeat you by the thousands?! I never should have let that incompetent braggart take charge of business in America, let alone Diamond City of all places!"
Sniper Bomber scoffed. "Well, what did you expect? They're friggin' Contras; gung-ho, but not stupid."
"Duh! I know that, but the fact they magically turned the tables in their favor baffles me!" Purple Basilisk threw his arms high in frustration. "Not even their holy powered toys could scratch the Super Titanium alloy, unless..."
"Blaze Bomber brought his human friend, Penny Crygor, to safety before we took him prisoner, so she could try and exploit a flaw in the alloy itself. Aaron and Ami could only have survived, much less freed themselves along with Bill and Lance, if Magnet Bomber was too overconfident for his own good."
Purple Basilisk pounded his desk in a hissy fit. "I will NOT be outsmarted by a human child nor Blaze Bomber!"
"So what? We still have the entire planet covered with the Five Dastardly Bombers at the helm. We'll get our chance to strike hard, even if Axe Bomber's not bored as hell."
"Oh yeah?! What about your plan to make the Contras and their friends think Cute Pink turned evil by kidnapping her?! It's nothing but a flub now!"
Sniper Bomber replied smugly, "Will you relax? It was just a nasty little prank Axe and I felt like playing on them for kicks, that's all. We never counted on it too much to succeed, anyway. Besides, with the other Dastardly Bombers guiding our empire to sheer victory, not even the Contras can take us all."
During the conversation, Warlock Bomber stepped inside Purple Basilisk's office to greet his creator. "Good news! We've recently gotten Arctic Bomber arrested, just as we planned! I never knew Siren could imitate someone's voice, but she did us proud!"
"At least you did something right," said Purple Basilisk. "Now take our surviving men with you to Brain Bomber's hideout for more reinforcements. Sniper, Axe, and I have business to take care of."
"It's as good as done," acknowledged Warlock Bomber. "How much longer till Lord Red Falcon's resurrected back to life?"
"You can't rush art," answered Sniper Bomber.
Immediately after Warlock Bomber took his leave, Axe Bomber barged in. "Hey, boss! When do we get to kill the Contras? My axe hands are itchin' to rip 'em apart!"
"Not yet. We're supposed to supervise Basilisk in his assignment to redeem himself." Sniper Bomber gestured for his loyal second-in-command to bring Purple Basilisk along.
"Yeah yeah, but I'm bored with being cooped up in the Death Falcon every day and night..."
[End BGM]
[Stage BGM: Lakebed Temple (The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess)]
Mission 2C: PrettyBase
It is officially confirmed that this base is the source of the water pollution.
If said source isn't taken out, the pollution will spread all over the Atlantic Ocean...or worse.
Meanwhile, Cheerful White and Cool Black are said to be held prisoner inside PrettyBase.
August 29, 20XX
7:20 AM
Back down on Earth, Bill and Lance were glad to have made it past the enemy patrol alive. However, they knew they weren't done yet, as they still had the water pollution to stop before it got worse, for they could not afford to let Cheerful White and Cool Black down. Henceforth, they climbed out of the submarine and inside PrettyBase, deliberately ignoring a warning sign which read: DANGER! No loitering, spying, or intruding allowed! That means you, unless you're working for me. Thank you! ~ Pretty Bomber, soon-to-be permanent Queen of the Seven Seas
"Hey, Lance...um, about that water we stopped from seeping in."
"What about it?" asked Lance.
"Despite its polluted condition," explained Bill, "it wasn't acidic. If that were the case, then we wouldn't have encountered those illegally-modified BTR-80s at the Rio beach by now, much less hijack an enemy submarine."
"Yeah. And those subs wouldn't be around, either. I take it acid isn't Evil Pretty Bomber's style; just plain mucky water." As soon as Lance finished, a couple of mermen spotted him and his buddy, readying their three-pronged spears.
"Hey!" The merman shouted. "No loitering allowed! Or did you not bother reading the sign up front?"
"You probably heard it before," added the other merman, "but we'll just say it since you'll wind up dead anyway. Ahem...I dunno how you broke in, but we know how you're getting out: the hard way!"
Bill and Lance dodged the thrown spears, and elbowed the mermen down. "There are likely more on the way," warned Bill, "including Red Falcon's humanoid alien soldiers."
"Speaking of which," said Lance, "we should activate the 'Konami Barriers' Penny taught us, like with Aaron and Ami."
Bill shook his head no. "Not now, Lance. Let's stick with Aaron and Ami's gadgets' 5-hit barrier systems for now, then we can do the same for our M16 machine guns. We can't afford to waste the 30-hit Konami Barriers."
Lance nodded. "You've got a point there. It's probably best that we save it for the battle against Evil Pretty. Then again, it's been a while since we tried Bomberman Tournament on Game Boy Advance. Come to think of it...I don't remember if we beat the game or not."
For the time being, Bill and Lance turned on the 5-hit barrier systems within my Contra Rifle and Ami's Bomberman Watch; better for them to wait five minutes than half an hour for the protection to come back. Just then, two generic RF soldiers came by, only for Bill to stealthily knock them out with the butt of my Contra Rifle. He and Lance eventually dragged them into the darkened area of the room, and swiped their outfits - save for their underwear and socks. Before they walked off, Lance immediately put the KO'ed guards to sleep with a Sleep Bomb.
"These light armorsuits will surely help us blend right in," said Bill. "I mean, it's just the two of us against a large number of Evil Pretty's minions."
"But what if they see through our disguises," questioned Lance, "just by looking at Aaron and Ami's gadgets?"
"Then we say we stole them, even if our disguises won't last long."
"That might work, but let's hope they don't have X-ray visions and stuff."
Despite the risk that Evil Pretty Bomber's minions might have X-ray vision, Bill and Lance went along with their plan anyway. They sneaked their way across the guard-filled rooms, making sure to act casual. One of the guards spotted them and, thinking they're working for the so-called queen, asked, "Ah, there you are! Did you get 'em?"
Bill reluctantly put on a gruff voice again, knowing not to get caught. "Sure did!"
Lance followed suit. "It was helluva tough, but we got 'em good and swiped their gizmos! These gloves sure come in handy so they don't hurt us!"
"Seriously? I mean, awesome! We'll take over from here. You need to escort Trigger Bomber to Princess Pretty Bomber's lair, so the ceremony will start!"
"Uh...ceremony?" asked Lance.
The guard sighed. "Have you forgotten already?! She's about to crown Shirobon and Kurobon as her loyal servants! Once the ceremony is over, they must promise to love and obey her 24/7, or else! Now get moving with the others! We'll make sure no one else dares get in!"
Bill and Lance left, but upon approaching the next door, a wall-mounted sentry scanned their bodies. It was as they thought after all: it had X-ray vision. "I CAN SEE DIFFERENT-LOOKING FACES BEHIND THESE HELMETS," the sentry bellowed, with a male voice. "THE FACES OF HUMANOID INTRUDERS. DEATH TO THE FOUR CONTRAS!"
[End BGM]
[Alert BGM: GF Battle Theme (Metroid Prime 3: Corruption)]
"CRAP!" Lance shouted. "I was afraid something like this would happen!"
"Weapons free!" Bill warned, just as the same guards they spoke with earlier came rushing in.
"I take it you're the same Bill Rizer and Lance Bean who survived our outer defenses!" The guard pulled out an AK-47 machine gun. "Well, we found the bodies of our comrades you stripped of their armorsuits!"
The other guard added, "Give them back, and we shall kill you peacefully!"
Lance smirked. "You want 'em? Here ya go!" He and Bill took off the armorsuits, chucked them at the two guards, and electrified them with a Thunder Bomb.
"This way, Lance!"
"Now can we turn on the 30-hit Konami Barriers?"
Bill thought quickly, eventually deciding there was no other option but to do so. "It's a dangerous risk, but it's better than getting swatted all over, even if we do find cover. Up, up, down, down!"
Lance followed suit. "Left, right, left, right!"
Then the twosome blurted simultaneously, "B, A, Select, and Start!"
In a flash, my Contra Rifle and Ami's Bomberman Watch activated the 30-hit barriers around Bill and Lance. Without hesitation, they began mopping up the place along the way. The alien soldiers tried their hardest to kill the two Contras, only for their shots to be deflected by the barriers. Needless to say, it's very easy to lose track of how many more hits the Konami Barrier can sustain, especially in the heat of battle. Nearly half an hour of exploring PrettyBase later, in addition to killing more bad guys and destroying some enemy machinery, Bill and Lance found themselves face-to-face with Trigger Bomber just outside Evil Pretty Bomber's lair. As of now, Bill didn't have the Crash Missiles nor the Drill Shot anymore (since the Konami Barrier took some damage for him), but rather the Spread Gun and Laser Beam that Penny and Blaze Bomber sent in from Crygor Labs.
"Ahh," Trigger began, "I was hoping you'd die before you got here, but I digress."
"Consider yourself disappointed, Trigger Bomber," Bill stated smugly.
"Sorry to burst your bubble," added Lance, "but we're shutting this pollution factory down!"
Trigger Bomber laughed it up, as if the Contras' words were like thunder yet without lightning, to him. "Talk is cheap! But nevertheless, I was getting tired of patrol duty ever since I got assigned here. I'll be more than happy to turn you two into Swiss cheese!"
[End BGM]
Before the Chaotic Bomber could open fire, Evil Pretty Bomber's voice interrupted him. "STOP! I'll handle them myself."
"What?! Aw, c'mon! You never let me have any fun!"
Evil Pretty Bomber shook her head no. "That won't be necessary. Well, fellas? Come on in to my room! There aren't any fancy-looking mines waiting to blow you to bits. I don't want my room looking dirty from the explosions, anyway."
Trigger Bomber huffed in disappointment, but he obeyed her and glanced back at the two Contras. "You're free to go, but no funny stuff or it's curtains for your sorry asses!"
Recalling what Magnet Bomber did to me and Ami back at MagnetBase in Diamond City, Bill and Lance took careful steps towards the door, which Trigger Bomber opened for them with a keycard. Upon stepping inside, he closed the door behind them and resumed his post up front. Unlike all the other rooms inside PrettyBase, Evil Pretty's lair was pink all over, in a way that young princesses could only dream about. True to her word, though much to their surprise, she initially greeted them with a curtsy.
[Introduction BGM: Peach's Message (Super Mario 64)]
"Hi there, and welcome to my bedroom! I'm your hostess, Pretty Bomber!"
[End BGM]
[Alert BGM: Tower of Zot (Final Fantasy IV)]
With her introduction out of the way, she put aside her sweet exterior and got down to business. "I heard about you from Magnet Bomber, although I was expecting all four of you guys to show up."
"You can thank him for putting Aaron and Ami out of action with his booby trap," said Bill, dryly.
"No offense," stated Lance, "but there can be only one 'Pretty Bomber' on this planet."
Evil Pretty Bomber retorted, "You mean Cute Pink? Pshhh! She's a phony! I'm the real deal!" Then she pointed to Cheerful White and Cool Black, who were tied to the bed.
"Please!" White cried. "Stop this!"
"Snap out of it!" Black pleaded.
Bill called out to get their attention. "White! Black! It's us, Bill and Lance! We're here to save you on behalf of the good Pretty Bomber: Cute Pink!"
Lance added, "That one next to you is the evil one! She's trying to fry your brains with her lies!"
Evil Pretty Bomber stepped in front of her bed, sternly placing her hands on her hips. "Hah! Feel free to stop your silly quest now, cuz I'm about to take you out, stinky Contras! AH, HA HA HA HA HA HAH! All shall bow down before me as the new and permanent Queen of the Seven Seas! Oh, and give my regards to Magnet Bomber if you so happen to run into him. I didn't expect you'd be able to discover our Super Titanium alloy's weakness, but then again, I'm surprised he managed to enslave a whole country not from its capital, but rather the confines of...Diamond City, was it? No matter, because the rest of us Dastardly Bombers are far more powerful than him."
Still staring at Bill and Lance, she got out a dark Smash Ball from her drawer. "C'mere, my dearest Smash Ball. Show your power! Let me transform into Pretty Balloon!"
[End BGM]
[Boss BGM: Dastardly Bomber Battle! (Bomberman Tournament)]
Evil Pretty Bomber opened the palms of her hands and closed her eyes, thus enabling the Smash Ball to float in front of her by telekinesis. She focused deeply, and balled up her hands, breaking the Smash Ball in the end. Within seconds, she mutated into a large octopus, which obviously did not look anything like a balloon, the way she called her monstrous form. Her feet and arms became a bunch of tentacles, while she retained a rather large-sized golden heart emblem on her forehead. Bill and Lance thought her monster form was called "Pretty Squid" because she resembled an octopus...at least that's what they recalled from Bomberman Tournament on Game Boy Advance.
"Stay right where you are," boomed Evil Pretty Bomber, her voice being monstrous, "and bow down before me!"
Bill sternly refused. "Never! Your water pollution scheme ends now!"
Lance readied his M16 machine gun, holding it on his right hand. "We've beaten you once before in Bomberman Tournament, and perhaps we can do so in real life!"
Evil Pretty Bomber wasn't intimidated one bit. "As your people might say, such silly simulations aren't exact!" She grabbed Bill and Lance with her tentacles, thereby catching them off guard, and continuously slammed them on the floor until their Konami Barriers wore off.
"YEEOOOOWW! OW! OW! OW!"
"OUCH! OOCH! LEGGO OF US!"
Evil Pretty Bomber, still slamming the Contras against the floor, said mockingly, "Oh, I'll let you bozos go, alright...straight into that wall!" The evil pink princess threw Bill and Lance into the wall, doubling up their pain. Since they used up plenty of their energy for the Konami Barriers to activate, they wound up exhausted. This gave Evil Pretty an advantage to jump up and butt-slam them, and repeated that process a couple more times, all the while snorting mockingly.
"Mwa ha ha ha ha ha! This is gonna be just like old times, such as when I piloted a turtle mech to slam Shiro and Kuro around! Or better yet, the one time I sent my cute li'l Pretty Bombs after Shiro - and I didn't even have to lift a finger to move those heart-shaped bombs around! You're the dead twerps! You're the dead twerps!"
"...Bullcrap!" Bill muttered, as he grabbed one of the dropped Star Drink cans, opened it up, and drank its recommended dosage. Lance did the same for himself as well.
"These may not last more than like five minutes or so," said Lance, "but we'll use what we got to dethrone you!"
By consuming just a bit of their Star Drinks, Bill and Lance were super-charged with twice the strength. Fortunately, the way those energy drinks functioned were nothing like the typical anabolic steroids, thanks to Penny's careful studying. The two Contras stood their ground, goaded Evil Pretty Bomber into attacking them, and avoided her swipes and poisonous blobs she shot out of her arms. As soon as they landed some punches and kicks, she turned into a spherical slime with a ball-shaped core in its center. This was no ordinary ball, as it was in fact a bomb. Recalling from Bomberman Tournament, Bill and Lance waited for Evil Pretty to expose her sunken parts by shooting out pink slime. That's when Lance chucked a Fire Bomb at the core, inflicting damage but not without setting off a big blast before he and Bill could get away.
"YEOWCH!" Bill winced. "Now I see why she calls her form 'Pretty Balloon'..."
"Yeah," agreed Lance, "but like from the game, we have to avoid the poisonous blobs until she reforms herself."
Having followed their own advice by moving around carefully, Bill and Lance prevented the blobs from poisoning them. Evil Pretty eventually reformed herself, and then exclaimed, "The next time you blast me like that, I won't go bye-bye alone!"
Lance had a gut feeling what was soon to happen. "Bill, we have to hurry before our Star Drinks wear off! Otherwise, we might not survive the outcome!"
Bill acknowledged without a doubt. "I'm all over it, buddy! I'll draw her attention while I still can!"
While Lance threw another Fire Bomb, Bill goaded Evil Pretty into chasing him. With that, she turned into a large ball of slime for the second time. She exposed her weak spot again, the two Contras blasted the bomb core once more, and the battle eventually came to a close. However, in a desperate move, Evil Pretty ensnared Bill and Lance by the legs so they couldn't escape. Her body began exploding, as the bomb core became red-hot once more, gradually inflating like a balloon.
"Ugh!" grunted Bill. "I'm stuck! I can't get out!"
"Me neither!" Lance uttered huskily. "I hope we don't die!"
Meanwhile, Cheerful White gasped at the horrific sight of his rescuers. "Bill Rizer! Lance Bean!" he cried, as he and Cool Black struggled real hard, eventually freeing themselves from being tied to the bed by the ropes.
"Hee hee hee hee hee!" Evil Pretty blurted excitedly. "Go boom for me, PrettyBase! GO BOOM!"
White panicked in fear, running behind his former rival as they came towards the Contras. "Hold on, guys! We're coming!" With Black's words, Bill and Lance struggled with all their might to escape, even with the help of a couple Ice Bombs to freeze the exploding slimy body. They managed to break free, but the bomb core was still swelling up in size, until it became big as a beach ball. Using what little time they had left from their Star Drink dosage, Bill and Lance took White and Black to safety, only to find out too late that Trigger Bomber secretly welded the door shut on the other side, before he fled the doomed base. Having lost their only safe way out, the Contras purposely held their friends down on the floor with their bodies for protection.
[End BGM]
"Brace yourselves, everyone!" barked Lance. "She's gonna blow!"
"BYE-BYYYEEE!" uttered Evil Pretty Bomber, as the bomb core finally exploded, reducing her monstrous body to nothingness with a pinkish spirit flying out of her. That very same explosion destroyed the entire base and its water-polluting mechanism, thus stopping the pollution once and for all, but not without rendering Bill, Lance, Cheerful White, and Cool Black unconscious...
Two hours later, the foursome woke up on the Rio beach, miraculously lucky to be alive. Had Bill and Lance not used their Star Drinks by the end of the battle, they would have been killed in the explosion.
"Ugh...wh-where are we...?" groaned Bill.
"What happened...?" croaked Lance.
Mona sighed in relief. "Ah, thank heavens you're alive! We were worried you might have died like Aaron and Ami almost did!"
9-Volt explained, "We heard you were in danger, so we asked a local White Wizard for help!"
The female White Wizard spoke Portuguese, which Mona, 9-Volt, Phoebe, and Cute Pink were able to interpret with their translator devices. Then the Bomber-girl testified, "She said that when you took out evil me, you also took out the whole base and the source of the water pollution. Within a week or so, the water should return to normal."
The White Wizard spoke again, this time with Phoebe interpreting the translation for Bill, Lance, White, and Black. "She also said you were nearly killed, but her White Magic saved your lives. That's when you were teleported to our boat, and here we are!"
"Really? Thanks!" chirped White.
"We owe you one..." said Black.
[Victory BGM: Elemental Stone (Bomberman 64: The Second Attack!)]
Bill stretched his arms out, relieved to have survived. "Thank goodness those Star Drinks protected us from certain death! It's fortunate we had enough for White and Black to take a few sips, before PrettyBase blew up."
Lance smiled in agreement. "My sentiments exactly. I thought we were done for, but we made it. Those vile mermen won't be tormenting innocent people anymore."
"Now we can all relax," said 9-Volt, "since you two defeated Evil Pretty Bomber."
"I second that," added Phoebe.
In the end, Mona and the others helped take their exhausted friends back to the hotel so they could rest up after the tough battle back at PrettyBase. With two of the Five Dastardly Bombers dead, only Golem Bomber, Brain Bomber, and Plasma Bomber remain. But by the time Ami and I are fully healed, we'd be ready to fight alongside Bill and Lance once again.
[End BGM]
TO BE CONTINUED...
The Atlantic Ocean is free of PrettyBase's poisonous substance, Bill and Lance have cheated death upon defeating its evilly sweet mistress inside, and the people of Brazil are no longer harassed by the vicious mermen everyday. Aside all that, I'll be seeing you next chapter, some other time!