Sooooo, here's the next chapter, I'm sorry that it took more than 4 weeks to finish it but it's been a tough one. Also I'm just really busy with school but I'll write more in the next few weeks because I'll have some more time to do so.
Thanks to those who wrote me these nice reviews and follow/liked my story you guys are awesome. 3

Anyways as always I hope you enjoy and maybe you could leave a review.

"Britt?" Santana asked while she turned herself around so she was facing me.

"Yes San?" We were lying on her bed for the last 3 hours. On the floor were our Spanish books, we didn't really learn tonight we just talked about us, where we came from, what kind of life we've lived so far. It was the first time I really thought, that I knew her though.

"Do you want to stay for tonight?" Uhm what? That was going to be difficult for me.

"Yeah, sure. I'll just have to go home and pack some things." I really couldn't say no to her.

"I'm coming with you!" Okay.. that sounded like something big would happen, why was she so happy about this? We stood up and when she was about to head out of the room I called her:

"Santana?"

She turned herself around and was leaning against the door frame. "Yes?" she was smiling, that kind of smile you couldn't fake. "Why are you so happy?"

"It's just.. well, doesn't matter okay? Let's go get you stuff!" sure, like it would have been so hard to say that she's happy I'll spend the night with her. Wait, with her? That sounds wrong. Next to her. Am I even sleeping next to her?

And of course, before my brain could have stop my mouth I already asked that stupid question: "Wait, San? Where am I going to sleep? Please don't let me sleep on the floor.. I hate that." Honestly I could have waited until it was bedtime if I really wanted to know but okay.

It took her a few seconds to realize the stupid question I just asked, but then she just gave me a little wink and turned around to head downstairs. So, that's where I'm going to sleep? Nice.

I had to hurry a bit because when I was downstairs she already had opened the font door and was ready to go get my stuff.

"Why do we have to hurry? I mean, I don't even know if mom will let me sleep at yours.." That was actually a really good point, because since I came out my mother thinks that I'm sleeping with every girl I hang out with. And if it wasn't for my good Spanish grades I got, she wouldn't believe that Santana and I were practicing Spanish on Fridays either.

When we were halfway there and talked about Tubbs when I saw a bunch of kids coming closer. Santana stopped immediately and stared into their direction. First I didn't think anything of it and laughed: "What's up San? So shocked that he ate all the ice-cream?" (Stupid fucking me.) But when she didn't say anything I knew something else must have been wrong. She was shaking. Her whole body was shaking. Her eyes were tearing up and she looked scared. Santana's hands found my arm. The grip got so tight that I felt the blood stopped reaching my fingers.

While Santana was having a panic attack next to me the kids were still coming closer. They seemed to recognize us or at least her because the tallest boy of them was pointing in at us with his finger.

Santana's grip tightened with every step they came closer.

And then it hit me.

Of course, these guys had to be the ones who were threatening Santana. Who else would have made her feel like that.

As I realized that they were almost close enough to hurt us (yeah well after what Santana told me about them I thought they'd hurt us) I dragged her onto a small path that would lead us to the wood I've been running at the last three months.

So I knew where we had to go so there wasn't a chance for us to get lost. I would have recognized every little thing, like a tree or every pile of leaves if I wasn't in such a hurry.

Santana didn't protest at all when I forced her to come with me by taking her hand, she just looked at me while the first tears escaped her eyes. Really, I know this girl for less than 3 months but have already seen her cry as often as Quinn. When I looked back to see if they were following us I frowned, they were.

I didn't know what to do in the first place but realized soon after that we had to move faster to get to my house.

And that's what we did. We ran. I could hear them scream after us: "What's up Sanny, aren't you happy to see us?"

That only made me run faster. I tugged at Santana's arm to make her run too. She was only one step behind me but still I had to make sure that she's there every 3 seconds.

I took a grip around her hand just to feel that she's not gone.

"Who's that Lopez? Your new girlfriend?" the tall boy screamed again. Even if the words hit me hard, I felt relief cause his voice became lower.

"Whaaaat? Sanny, I knew that you're dyke. Haha, don't play it off again!?" I could hear a girl's voice call. Immediately Santana wanted to stop, but now was not the time. I squeezed her hand and tried to speak as soft as possible "Gosh San, were almost there, just go on!" Well, that wasn't soft at all, but it did work.

She started to move again and we ran the last few meters to my house. We entered the house through our backyard. When we went in my mom stood right in front of me and I almost ran into her. "Don't you have eyes?!" I screamed. Not really the best way to ask your mom if you can have a sleepover with a friend. But I was so stressed and still focused on these guys that I wasn't able to keep my voice low.
"Uhm, Brittany? You ran into me?" my mom must have recognized that something was wrong, usually she would have made a comment about me bitching around. But she didn't.

Santana shot me a look that told me she wanted to get her mind cleared.

"San? You can go upstairs, I'll be with you I in time."

She nodded and went upstairs.

I looked after her until she was gone.

When I turned to face my mother again she was already cleaning the shelves on the wall.

"Mom?" I asked her lightly.

She turned herself around and looked deep into my eyes. I knew she was trying to figure something out, but I just couldn't tell what it was.

"Do you love her?" she asked when a smile appeared on her face.

"Eh what? Santana? No of course not! Why?" I was getting nervous. Thinking that you might fall for someone is one thing, but hearing that your mother thinks you are a completely different!

"I just thought that the way you two looked at each other meant..-" "NO! We're nothing. Just friends. I just wanted to ask you if I could stay at hers for tonight?" I hate cutting her off. But hearing how she thought about the way Santana looked at me would've been too much.

Not because it's not true but because it would hurt to hear that I might be right about her.

She sighted before offering me a sweet smile. I knew what that meant!

I hugged her and squeezed a "Thanks" before running upstairs. On the last stair I found a crying Santana with her head in her hands and my mood dropped back to where it was before mom said "yes". I offered her my hand by touching hers lightly. She took it and stood up.

I lead her into my room and while I closed the door behind us she was already collapsing on my bed.

This just reminded me of the last time she lay in my bed. When she came here, full of dirt and totally destroyed by these assholes. And with that they came back on my mind.

Santana was curled up like a ball on my bed and I really didn't know what to do. Sure, I could have just waited until she calmed down enough to talk but that was definitely not my plan. At first I didn't have a plan at all, but my head told me what I wanted to hear of I was her.

So I sat down next to her and tried to talk to her.

"San? These were the bullies weren't they?"

By noticing that her crying got harder I knew that I was right. It's not like I thought I wasn't, but I hoped it.

I let my hand rest on her back to comfort her. She leaned into my touch almost immediately.

"San, have you told anyone about that?"

She sat up and looked at me, my hand still resting on her back.

"W-w-what?" she stuttered. It was kind of a miracle that she managed to say anything at all.

"Did you talk to anyone about these guys bullying you?"

She looked at me like I just suggested the most disgusting thing ever.

"You may have to, I mean.. You already told me what they did to you the last time, when you came to me, but it doesn't seem like they're going to stop soon. Maybe they'll do something that's really going to hurt you!" I was scared for her. I really was. The bullies didn't look handsome, in fact they looked dangerous.

Santana stood up straightened her clothes and fixed her hair that was a mess. I had no idea how she felt in that moment, ever since I tried to make eye contact or get intimate with her, on a friendly basis I felt like she was drawing a circle around her personal space.

"Well, they already did that." her gaze fell to the ground. I guess she thought I didn't know that, but as stupid as I am when it comes to math or geography or whatever, when it comes to people I'm really good. Except almost everyone could have seen how hurt she was.

She was uncomfortable, but that wasn't a surprise.

I wanted to make sure that she heard the next thing. So I lifted her chin with my hand. She was kinda forced to make eye contact with me, but somehow she managed to look everywhere but me.

That didn't really matter as long as we were on the same high. "Santana.." I began, when she finally hold my gaze. Her eyes still had tears in them, or these were new. I don't really know, but it didn't matter either.

"I mean not only emotionally? What would you have done if I hadn't been with you?

You were totally out of control! San, you didn't move until I dragged you."

Tears were escaping her eyes and I carefully wiped them away with my thumbs.

"Britt I'm scared.." it came out as a whisper.

She was, I offered her a small smile and watched her fiddling with the hem of my shirt before I pulled her in a tight hug. I could feel how she relaxed into my embrace.

That was all I could ask for in that moment. Pulled me closer as I thought was possible, but I knew that was what she needed right now.

"I know" I said soft. It wasn't really an answer to what she said before, it was more like a statement to this whole situation: "me too."

Again I felt how small and fragile she was, and again I knew that this wouldn't last. I didn't know how long it would take her to make an unappreciative comment about her not being gay but that wasn't even on my thoughts anyway. Although it really surprised me that she didn't yet, cause, the bullies had totally made clear what they thought. These were everything I could think of in that moment. I mean, they had to have something against Santana. Why would they feel so confident if they hadn't?

And wait, didn't that girl say "Don't play it off again"? What did she mean by again?

I knew if I would bring it up right now Santana would have been gone so I would just have to wait until the right time comes.

"So, what will I have to take with me?" I asked as I pulled apart and turned around to grab a bag from my cupboard. Santana stood there for a while not saying or doing anything before she gave me a small smile and answered: "Uhm, I guess fresh clothes, toothbrush and stuff, and maybe you have a good DVD?" She was still quiet but at least she was able to form full sentences.

I grabbed my stuff and told her some stories about Tubbs because they make everyone laugh. No matter how sad you are, a story about a smoking cat is always welcome and especially because they're true.

When I finished packing everything I had into this bag we went downstairs. "Bye mom, bis morgen!" I shouted without even looking where she was.

"So, you're speaking German with your parents?" Santana asked when we finally got out of our house.

"Uhm, sometimes. But as long as we're here, we mostly speak English. And you and your parents?"

I was curious about that. I mean, I knew that she could speak Spanish fluently, but I never got if she was American or Spanish or Hispanic or wherever they spoke Spanish.

"Not really, only when my abuela is with us. But that's because my parents already grew up here so there isn't really the need to speak Spanish either." I felt like this was going to be an actual conversation. Like something you can just talk about without constantly having this tensed feeling.

It's pretty amazing how we got to this point when less than 30min ago she was crying really hard.

"Well, Spanish is a hot language.." before I could think about what I was supposed to say it already came out. I could have slapped myself for that comment, but at least I was being honest. Ireally think Spanish is hot.

"Uhm, okay. German is too!" argh, she was an awful liar.

I just laughed "What? Why are you laughing?" Did she really have to ask that?

"You're lying. German isn't hot, if German is anything than strange. I mean, most people say something about German always sounds like you're angry. But you can sound nice while speaking German too." I explained.

This is actually really a thing in our family, my parents would always discuss about how they colleges don't understand that German is a usual language.

"You can? So, then say something nice to me in German." she looked at me for a moment before turning her head back forward.

"Nah, I don't know what to say." this wasn't going to end well, I knew it!

"Come on, just say anything, please." she started poking me in the sides. It was tickling and I couldn't handle it very well so I gave in soon after she started.

"Okay okay.. Uhm.."

"Britt!"

"Yes, I'm thinking.." I didn't know what to tell her.

And then I said the first thing that came into my mind:
"Du bist das Schönste was ich je gesehen habe." I said soft while a smile appeared on my lips, although it didn't last long.

Oh my god, if she understood that, I'm going to die. I could have said anything like, how the weather was or what my favorite color is but no, I totally had to tell her that she is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

She cleared her throat "Uhm, yes. That indeed sounded beautiful. What does it mean?"
Thank god!

"Well, you'll have to find out on your own!" I chuckled.

I hoped that she didn't even heard what I said, so she wouldn't get to know it anyways.

"Can you repeat it?" she said while taking her phone out of her pocket.

"No, of course not, that would be way too easy." I was satisfied with how I handled this situation. Sure, inside of me I was freaking out, but I was good enough at keeping it inside that she didn't recognize it at all.

"You're mean!" she sighted.

Maybe I was dumb, stupid, useless and much more, but definitely not mean.

"I'm not, and you know that." I poked her in her rips, but made sure it wouldn't hurt her.

"Maybe?" she answered while fiddling with her key.

I hadn't recognized that we were already there. Maybe that was because I didn't feel the need to reach something before I can be comfortable again.

Our talk hadn't been extremely deep though, but it wasn't as uncomfortable as it used to be.

When we got into her house I realized that we were alone. Like, actually alone.

"Uh San? Aren't your parents home or something?"

"Nope, my mum's gonna come home at 10PM and my dad won't be home at all." She explained, I could hear a little disappointment when she talked about her dad.

"Why?" I couldn't resist. Really, if I was close to her, right now I was about to destroy everything.
"Y-You don't have to tell me though. Sorry." I quickly added. I really didn't want to rush her into something. She shouldn't feel like I would force her to tell me whatever it was. I felt extremely uncomfortable

"Britt, it's fine. He's just a surgeon at the hospital and isn't home very often. Nothing else, okay?" she smiled when she explained to me.

So, we weren't even 2 minutes at her place and I've already embarrassed myself. In other words, I've been my perfect self.

It didn't bother me that much though, because I knew Santana wouldn't think anything of it. She never does. It's like she doesn't care.

"Will we talk?" I asked curiously. I wanted to know more about these bullies, sure, she told me once but to be honest I didn't remember too much.

Maybe she didn't want to talk about them at all, but that won't matter because she has to talk about them.

If she doesn't want to talk about it with me, fine but she had to say something.

Really, I don't know if I went too far, because she looked at me, but avoided my eyes. She's was uncomfortable. But still not uncomfortable enough to throw me out.

"About what?" seriously? Why would you ask that? Santana totally knew what I've been talking about, and still she asks a question like that.

"Come on, you know who I meant." I said, taking a seat on the couch in the living room.

She sat down next to me, her eyes glued to the floor.

"You know everything, what should we talk about?", she sighted finally looking at me.
It must have been hard for her. I guess she never told anyone about this, but honestly? How come that nobody recognized this? This girl has been threatening by some guys who aren't very discreet. "I know nothing San.. Let's start at the beginning, why are they threatening you?" I shuffled a bit closer to her, just to make her feel that I would be there and that I wouldn't go anywhere.

"I don't even remember how it all began." she sighted.

The way she said that made me a bit curious. Because it really sounded like she just didn't want to talk about it.

"Gosh Santana. I thought that we moved past this. Of course you remember. Nobody forgets something like that-" "Something like what?!" she interrupted me with her voice louder that it was before.

"Something that brings this much of pain.." I said quietly. Sure, I had no idea how Santana felt, but I could see that she was hurt. And the way she reacted when we met them earlier only showed how right I've been.

She thought about lying to me, I knew that. The way she tried to look at anything but me, like she was searching for the answer, made me feel like she wasn't comfortable with telling me yet.

"Look San, you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to. But maybe talking wouldn't be a bad thing for you." she still wasn't looking at me so I used my hand to make her look at least in my direction before I continued "You don't have to handle any of this alone. There are people who want to help you, even if you're not the nicest person in the world sometimes." She chuckled at this and tried to look away again but my hand didn't let her.

"Why do you shut yourself down like that?"

"It's easier." she whispered. "Sometimes." I answered "But most of the time it makes life a lot harder. Do you trust anyone?"

I wanted her to say that she trusted me, because probably I was the only one who cared about her in that way. Maybe this wasn't good at all and it just meant that I still fell for her but I just couldn't imagine how she would handle all of this stuff on her own.

I saw a small tear escaping her eyes and rolling down her cheek. Well, I thought that this was a 'no'.

Why would she cry if it wasn't anyways?

"I trust you.." her lips formed a small barely there smile and I gave her a bigger one in response.

"Then tell me." I didn't want to rush her, I really didn't. But honestly I thought that maybe she's been alone with whatever it is long enough.

Again she sighted before she began to talk or at least before she said my name: "Britt.." "Santana, don't feel like I want to rush you or anything. If you're not in the mood of telling me right now, then that's okay. But if you trust me, which you said you do, it shouldn't be such a big thing. Don't let them get you. You shouldn't feel uncomfortable while telling me, and you won'tI promise you that and you know why? Because it's okay, it's okay to tell people what's on your mind and it's okay to tell people what hurts you. Maybe I can't do anything to help you, but who knows that? If we don't even try to get this right you'll regret it soon. At least I'll try everything to help you, and make you feel better. Okay?" I asked, she was now looking at me. I said what I thought, and for once that didn't sound stupid at all.

If I was being honest I was impressed by myself. A few years ago I wouldn't have had the strength to tell anybody about my own problems, so I wouldn't even think about saying something like that.

People change, and I really hoped that Santana would do that soon too. It's hard to help someone who acts like she didn't need help at all. But when you get these small moments where people like her open themselves long enough and wide enough to let you see what's really going on inside of them you see how weak they actually are.

That's exactly what made me think that maybe she would try to let me in. I don't know what happened to her, but I know that I love these small moments too much to just let her move too far to reach.

Now was one of these moments where I get to see what's inside of her but soon enough she would shut me out again, that was for sure but I didn't care.

I knew that she only tried to protect herself from something that happened to her.

She was like me when it came to that. I wouldn't let a lot of people get close to me either.

Sure, I'd never act like a bitch or be mean to someone. But only a few people knew my little secrets. To be honest only Quinn and Tina. With my little secrets I didn't mean being gay or loving my cat but most people don't know the little things that are going on with me. Like, that I'm constantly trying to get rid of that lack of knowledge about almost everything I need in school or how I'm feeling about dance. Even Tina doesn't know about those things. Quinn has been the only one that ever completely understood how, when and why I felt something. It's weird that I didn't tell her first about me being gay but it only made me understand even more why she's been mad.

I didn't realize that I've been in my thoughts for such a long time unless she cleared her throat.

I immediately snapped out of my thoughts and gave my attention to Santana again.

"Britt, there was something that happened in the last year at my old school. I'm not ready yet to tell you what had happened completely, but it made them hate me. You're going to laugh-" "I'd never laugh at you!" I immediately regretted that I said that. Maybe now she wouldn't finish what she wanted to say. But she just nodded slowly before continuing.

"I know, but it's funny, these kids were my best friends before that one thing happened. I never thought that I'd ever lose them but sometimes a small thing is enough to let the bomb explode, you know? I didn't do something, and I didn't hurt any of them. But it seems like they thought otherwise about this. I changed, at least I didn't really changed. But I became honest. I didn't lie about myself anymore, and that's why I lost them. I don't quite get why they behave like this. I mean, they could just let me be my stupid little self, but instead they threat my like I'm their little victim.

And that's how I feel, you know? Like a victim. I don't get to say anything if I'm a victim, so I stopped being myself and created this little bitchy version of a girl. It's easier, it really is for me. I'm just afraid that if I let anyone in again and that if I'm being honest the same thing will happen over and over again. You can see how I'm barely handling this thing, and if that happens again I won't make it. It would break me." she was now crying. She's been completely honest with me for what feels like the first time. "I won't let that happen." I said as quietly as I could. And with that she fell into my arms. I hugged her as tight as my arms allowed me to just to make her feel that it will be okay. I didn't even knew if it really would be okay, but I knew that I would try everything to make her feel good again. To make her feel like herself again. To let her be honest with herself.

That's it, I hope you enjoyed and as usual I'm sorry for mistakes but I'll read over it again the following days.

Love you, and let me know what you think. 3